Lying on the bermuda grass
gazing at the stars,
we planned for our future
as if it's only a call away.

I remembered how you asked me,
"Why arent you writing anymore?"
And i sniffed, "Got no inspiration"
You kept silent, we had a fight that day.

And now Im alone,
Remembering where it went wrong
Like a strike of a lightning into a forbidden tree
I wasnt quite sure of the answer

All I know is that,
I lost the poet in me
When I found the love I am longing...
in you.

That's what love has taught me:
*YOU NEED TO LOSE YOURSELF TO FIND SOMEBODY

Im suicidal
And I am beyond happy
If I'd die tonight.

I was scared.
People around me noticed it.
They told me to try going out of my comfort zone.
To step outside the box.
I was scared.
But I gave a shot.
Now Im outside the box.
Wondering my existence.
Roaming around at every corner.
I was scared.
One wrong move
I might fail.
But I realized
I wasnt scared.
It's just in my head.
Because everything outside the box was
All my happiness.
I was once afraid of risking.

You asked me
If what makes me happy and sad.
I just laughed
Because you'll never know that
It's always been you.


You.

It's the way you look into her eyes
when you talk to her.


And even when youre not together.
You still speak about her like she's your universe.


And I,
Im just a listener.

"Im home"**

Said she.
I wore my typical smile.
I was happy for her
Not because she's home
But because she knew where her home was.


While I,
Im still figuring out where home is,
Is it a place with beds and comforters?
Somewhere you can rest?
Or a person with hazel eyes and a heartbeat?
Someone you can feel loved?

He started seeing
all the things I see in myself.
And that's the scariest thing for me
because I know he wont stay.

I was right

*He left me.