Changing faces for nameless places
Nameless people struggling for existence in a nameless time
Worship the incoherent ramblings
Of countless babbling nameless fools
Bread and water lead the lambs to slaughter
Prejudice injustice demanding obedience
Nameless zombies

Becoming the robotic puppet
Of the puppeteers desires
With pre-programmed responses
Feelings not your own

Desensitized children
Of a race of morbid loving junkies
We render them fearless, then cry
At the mass of chaos they invoke upon us

Lost leading the lost
Devouring the beauty in their paths
The scourge of the free man
Who lives under the delusion of his freedom

Prisoners all
While the power sits upon a high throne laughing
Unbelieving how simply they all fell
And obediently they continue to provide
The avenues of deception for his rich existence


© Crystal Erickson   11/24/2007

Share with me my pain, my pity
Share with me my loss, my loss
Don't pretend, don't play games
I can see what you hold in
I say nothing to this knowledge
That you hide on the outside
I know what you really think
The secrets you wont share
On the exterior your mask you wear
I will keep your secrets safe
Never let you know, I know
I'll never let you feel ashamed
Thinking what I'll think of you
I will share your pain, your pity
I do feel your loss, your loss
I pretend I can not see within you
I let you wear your mask
I love you either way!

©Crystal Erickson

Shavings of a canvas sky,
Slowly float and twirl by,
I lay back resting now,
my body heavy with its dread.
The torturous thoughts within my head.
For turns past I can not go back.
The lake of feelings brewing
turmoil and hurricane winds
That are gathering strength.
They will come and rage,
destroying this emotional cage,
in their fury, my emotions rip from me.
Shadows creep and slither in the wake of their destruction.
Mangled trees and dying wrath lay strewn about.
There is no path.
I stagger to the edge of my emotional cliff
And cast myself away.
Over the edge to the plummeting depths
from where I cant return.
The skies will clear and smile again.
The sun will kiss the dew.
I will wander the darkest deep
Lost and alone I'll wither and weep.
The blackness slowly starts to blue,
followed by a redish hue.
Then comes orange and yellow too.
Can I see a rainbow.....
Birds I hear them, waken I must
Dreaming of you,
I become dust!

© Crystal Erickson 4/24/08

Will you remember me when days grow cold?
When dark clouds close in and the ground dies under foot,
When all the world falls into slumber and oneness,
Will I fade from your consciousness?
When I am gone will it hurt?
Will I cry when you no longer think of me, and I die?
To exist only as a thought in your head.....
Life dependent on your thinking.
Even a memory... at least then,
I would be recalled from time to time, resurrected.
I can't even be  a memory because I never was...
never really existed.
Just something you one day thought up.
I can only survive as long as you are thinking me,
and continue entertaining the thought of me.
You have no way to give birth to me.
No way to make me exist in the material world.
No way to make me solid.
I am no more then an electrical impulse
passed between the synapses in your brain.
When they stop firing me to and fro I will cease to exist.
What will become of me when you fizzle me out?
Will you simply reabsorb me into your cells?
Will I be cast out as waste?
I turn to face my fate, yet you keep thinking me.
Torturing me in a way, recalling me, adding to me,
making me bigger, longer, more intricate.
What price I'd pay for you to create me in reality.
Impossible, I know...
To be able to see you from the outside in, instead of inside out!
To know the you, you present to the world.
The strong, creative, mysterious, smart,
confident, emotional you. The quiet you.
Instead I know the inner you, the screaming,
raging, crying, laughing, manipulative,
intelligent, humorous you.
Would I think of you the same.....,
could you manifest me into reality?
Would you me......?
You would know me after all, you thought me,
you created me, you own me.
Breathe life into my veins.
You are me!
Can I become a memory... of a thought... you once created?

© Crystal Erickson 11/24/07

Everything changes within a breath.
We breathe life's force in and exhale its poison.
Thirty some years spent in sweet slumber,
The numb relief to the painful awakening.
What the hell am I here for,
If not for some purpose.
I breathe his life in and exhale his pain.
And true to this action, I know it is killing me.
Everything changes in one breathing moment.
The death that is longed for,
the hunger, the need,
Is simply released from
the breath that we breathe.
I'm being slain honest and cold.
Defenses are crumbled as fast as their thrown.
Walls that get scaled as fast as their built.
Is this what is needed,  the lessons of soul?
To slumber no longer and face loves true toll.
Selfishness battles selflessness,
And the wager is all.
Using and neglecting life ****** out,  we fall.
There is no grand ending, no marbled hall.
Where is he hiding in this masquerade ball?

© Crystal Erickson 1/19/08

The epiphanies of my failures
and the reaper of reputations
strip me to the bone
strip me to the bone, and leave me bare to dry
licked repeatedly by the incinerating
UV rays of humanity.
Care not for me.
Care not.
Hold me never.
Laugh, laugh and walk away.

Left to my own, my ingenuity.
I build myself, I create myself.
I unbrainwash myself!
Years of reconstruction.
I succeed to emerge a greatness.
An inner entity of amazement.
No one understands.

Failure?  I wonder..
Pain always lingering in the depths.
Inadequacies, *******.
I push past, deal with, and battle face to face.
To leave dismembered on the floor.
Step on it, stomp it deep.
plunge it down to surface again in light.

ME
hold me, love me if your able.
Never take for granted,
my soul, not of this life.
This place, these people, this society.
I am light.
Capable of so many inconceivable things.
I am light
I need only when I let myself need.
I need you, only if to see me.
The true me,
The me no one can possibly see.
I cry, I love, I feel, I am awakened!

© Crystal Erickson 11/24/07

Step on me, go ahead.  Don't see my blood?
Truth be told it is red.  Don't hesitate.
I've been laying here for effervescent scores of time,
drifting in and out of knowing.
My heart sewn by threads of chance.
So scared of pain and the hurts I've lived.
reluctantly the love I give, is taken greedily.
And selfish truths come into light.
Cry I have like never before,
my mistake to open the door.
Lessons learned I did not head,
now I lay here on the floor to suffer my fate and bleed.
Darkness enveloping hope.
Jumping through hoops with a noose around my throat.
Praying each leap lands me on my pedestal without a false step.
The fatal end I know, waits for the careless step I take.
You the thief, who stole the whole of me.
All of me.
Made me go where I swore I would not.
Made me live my dreams.
Made me step out into fantasy,
My reality,
Come true to me,
Unbelievably,
I, so foolishly!
No one will ever catch me, my heart will never be.
Never see a safe horizon.
Never be surrounded in true and trusted arms of strength.
I can not save you, I can not save anyone,
For I need saving myself.
Can you save me?
Will you try?
Will you support my misguided step,
before the noose pulls tight?
I am bleeding on the floor, and running out of strength.
Will you stop my blood from running, or will you merely drink?

© Crystal Erickson 3/09/08

Amongst the multitude of solitudnal whims
I carry within,
Down to you, forgotten.
A youth that's fighting,
refusing to succumb to the delicacies
of an aging core.
The dream of love renewed,
The ambiance of it.
The life of a thousand nights of falling star
wishes and programmed dreams.
A chance within our grasps.
Mirrors.

Desolately has my soul resided in this
phantasmal reality of dull referendum,
misunderstood.
Neglected, rejected, tortured, hurt,
and broken.
I remain hidden.
A cool calm collected exterior.
The world sees me,
or so it thinks.

Hilarious hideousness.
My deceptions so simple.
Smoke and mirrors, magician I am.
Humor the powerful blinding agent
of stares, opinions, and gossip.
I laugh internally as the world judges me.
Forms its superficial egotistical
repressed opinions of me.

Do you..... see me true?
Can you.....will you ever chose to?
Demonic presence ever near, trying to **** me.
Have I fear?.........No, I have no fear!

© Crystal Erickson  11/24/07