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6.7k · Aug 2014
waiting
sweetsillybrat Aug 2014
Everyday, I wait for you.
It's all I ever do.
I wait for you to be home from school.
I sit around and stay cool.

I wait for you to be home from a guys' night out.
I make sure you're home safe so I can sleep without a doubt.
I wait for you when you feel like calling..
I wait for you, you know I do.

You did not force me to wait.
I guess, Im just the one who doesn't hesitate.
Maybe I just wanted to wait for you,
Or you give me reason to.

Im not complaining to you.
I just want you to appreciate what I do.
But there are really times when I think it's enough.
These were the times I think it's rough.

You keep me waiting for you.
Maybe you don't care coz you know waiting is what I always do.
But sometimes, you keep me waiting not knowing what to expect.
I think it's just painful and I feel that somehow there's no respect.

It's hard when you wait for something.
How much more if you just wait there not knowing what's gonna be happening?
When the person you're waiting for doesn’t say a word.
You think you're being absurd.

I just grew tired of doing so.
Especially when you found out you waited for nothing though.
I guess it breaks your heart.
I bet it tears you apart.
5.6k · Aug 2014
tears
sweetsillybrat Aug 2014
Then...they wont stop,
Slowly each of them drops.
They begin to flow.
Those types which rarely show.
Those that make you as cold as snow.
Sometimes the heart needs more time to accept what the mind already knows.
sweetsillybrat Sep 2014
I cannot give you things those other girls can.
I cannot give you pride, for I am not that pretty;
-compliments, for I feel awkward saying them to you;
-romantic moments, for I am clumsy and as they say, funny;
more time, for my course demands a lot of it;
special gifts, for I am not good in choosing one.
I am totally different from them but I know I should never be insecure,
For I can assure you that despite being just an ordinary girl,
I can give you my loyalty.
I can render you my care,
and as long as I exist, you will always be loved.
sweetsillybrat May 2014
I am not the princess-type girl who can eat with you in a formal restaurant.
I am no one but a simple girl, to some things I am ignorant.
I am not someone you can bring to formal events.
I might just ***** things up and cause some series of unfortunate incidents.

I don't know if im good enough.
They might disagree and for us they might make it tough.
They might not accept me the way my family accepted you.
They might not like me the same way you do.

I don't know what to say.
I don't know if there's an easy way.
I don't know what to think.
With embarrassment, I might shrink.

I feel dissatisfied and wanted to try harder.
So that, in the eyes of your loved ones, I am better.
I feel nervous and my self esteem is low.
I shouldn't feel this way, I know.

But I can't help it.
I don't want to just relax and sit.
I don't want to lose you.
I love you so much but I don't know what to do.
1.6k · Sep 2014
quiet love
sweetsillybrat Sep 2014
I want us to stay a little longer like forever;
but I know this moment is just between now or never.
I wish I could tell you how I feel about you;
but I can't 'coz I'm afraid you might not feel the same way too.

I'm sorry for being weak.
I'm sorry if I can't even speak.
All I can do is sit here and write.
Be right behind you as you shine like a star so bright.
1.4k · Sep 2014
if I die
sweetsillybrat Sep 2014
If I die today,
Would've anyone asked me to stay?
Would anyone cry?
Would anyone hope I didn't die?

Would there be good testimonies about me?
Or would people be glad and happy?
Would there be regrets I'll hear,
From people who brought me tears?

Will people say they'll miss me?
Or will no one bother to see,
The things I have done.
Now that I'm already gone.

If I die today
There's one prayer I want to say.
That is to witness my burial
To see if to my loved ones, I have been special.
771 · Sep 2014
you will find me there
sweetsillybrat Sep 2014
When it hurts to look back,
When you're afraid to look ahead,
Just look beside you and you will find me there.

Don't let your past imprison you,
Don't let your future worry you.
Live in the present and you will find me there.
755 · Apr 2015
believe
sweetsillybrat Apr 2015
Sometimes you ask why.
It is often accompanied by a cry.
You don't understand what God is trying to do.
There are so many questions in you.

There are just certain things, my friend,
that you have to wait for till the end.
Just like the answers to your questions,
you need to wait for future explanations.

It may be hard to accept it now,
but always remember, God is doing it for you,somehow.
So trust His ways, He knows what He is doing.
Whatever it is, be strong, keep believing.
659 · May 2014
be strong
sweetsillybrat May 2014
Life is not easy for you.
You've struggled a lot my dear.
I wasn't there for you physically, I know you wanted me right there to appear.

You told me about the things that bother you
But not the your feelings about them.
You tell me with that face that seems to be in control.
I decipher the covert things while I listen.

You tell me, "don't worry" when my face seems to.
I wanted to tell you I wont but that won't be true.
After sharing, you assure me it will soon end.
I just nod and give a smile to you.

I felt bad when you heard me talking about your problem to someone.
It wasn't my intention to gossip, I did it coz Im just proud of you.
You may not see it that way but it really is.
You are strong and hanging on despite everything you're going through.

Yes, you may be man enough to face all these,
You may be strong enough to get through each day,
But I want you to know, im here even if it won't change anything,
That you are facing them with me and I will be with you all the way.

God too, He won't abandon you.
His presence may not be obvious sometimes,
But know that He is just giving you your chance to fight.
He will always back you up when nothing else rhymes.

So hold your head up and keep the faith.
Keep trusting Him even though you don't understand a thing.
When you realize and see His plans, you will be thankful.
Thankful enough and praises to Him you will sing.

I'm here, He's here.
Don't you fret my dear.
We both love you and care for you.
Strengthen your faith and do what you must do.
576 · Apr 2015
girls
sweetsillybrat Apr 2015
Girls are complicated, they say.
But, girls just have their own way.
If boys got pride to defend,
girls have hearts to protect in the end.

When they say no even if they meant yes,
they are putting your sensitivity to test.
When they say they're okay even if they are not,
they are showing you the independence and strength they got.

As a man, you acknowledge that she's strong.
But, as a man loving her, you still try to be there when everything goes wrong.
Girls may be complicated as they say
but they are designed that way.
For you not to change them easily and hurt them in the end
For you to change yourself and still hold their hand.
524 · May 2014
then, he came..
sweetsillybrat May 2014
At one point in my life, I stopped believing in fairytales.
I didn't hope to have my own love story coz it usually fails.
I just enjoyed loving myself and my support system.
I wanted to just spend all my time with them.

But one day, I asked God for something I've been so curious about,
"Father, I wanted to know how it feels like to be loved with no doubt."
Then He answered me, "If you're not satisfied with My love alone, the more you cannot be satisfied by others' love."
And so, I spend most of my time loving and appreciating my Father above.

I was getting along so well but I didn't like hearing love stories.
Yeah, I was bitter and watched bitter movies.
Hehe, I didn't care about admirers.
I became insensitive about their feelings which made me an offender.

I built higher walls, and thicker boundaries.
I built it that way so no one can try to hurt me at least.
My mistrust issues were enormous.
My bitterness was also contagious.

Then, this man came.
I thought accepting his love is lame.
He tried so hard to go through my mistrustful heart.
Until now, he's still trying despite the difficult start.

He love me just the way I like it.
Every day, he shows me how I should be loved with no limit.
He's not ashamed of me.
He doesn't care about how people see me.
He doesn't mind how I look.
For him, I am good enough even if Im not the best cook.

He accepts me for who I am not for who I can become.
He treats me the way I should be which is often not practiced by some.
He doesn't care if I'm OC.
He doesn't mind, he tolerates me.

I can watch any corny or childish movie with him.
I can just be with him and dream.
He teases and argues with me,
But never did he leave without an apology.

I have a best friend in him and a soulmate too.
He is my cheerleader and he tells me,"I love you."
"I am happy," truly I can say.
Because he shows I'm worthy every day.

Yes, I have cried for someone
But that doesn't mean I can never move on.
I realized how blessed I am because of him.
He made me love God even more and be thankful to Him.
I may just be ordinary
But just be true to me and I will make you happy
440 · Apr 2015
Would you?
sweetsillybrat Apr 2015
Would you fight for something
when you know in the end, it's not gonna change a thing?
Would you still keep on holding
when you know very well the ending?

Would you still hope for a miracle to happen
despite the heaviness of the burden?
Would you still take the chance
when you know this would be the end of the dance?

When everything does not fall into place,
would you still finish the race?
When you are already told that you would lose,
would you still fight despite knowing the news?

When your dreams have to end here,
When you are asked to disappear,
When you are already losing,
would you keep on fighting?
would you?
392 · May 2015
Loved
sweetsillybrat May 2015
No one can explain properly how i feel loved by thee.
No one, not even the smartest person, not even me.
You're the rainbow which appears even when the rain hasn't stopped yet.
You're always the umbrella under the rain that keeps me from getting wet.

You look at me like how a child looks at a mountain of candies.
You stare at me like how a painter stares at beautiful sceneries.
You look amazed and dazzled every time.
Your eyes meeting mine.

I don't know how long it's gonna be.
You being truly inlove with me.
But, I want to thank you now,
for even starting to make your vows.

I told you I can't promise you forever.
But I told you we're in this together.
Forever is just a time frame.
What's important is that you came.

I love you, Bud.
I always would.
I'll try to be worthy.
I'll always try and make you happy.
319 · Jun 2017
Wait for me to heal
sweetsillybrat Jun 2017
I was never a perfect partner
Ive been repeating that all over.
But please know that I try to be a good one.
Even though a large part of the trust is gone.
Ive been crazy the past few days.
Thinking of many different ways.
My heart has a difficulty of healing.
With the broken pieces, everyday Im dealing.
I wanted to isolate myself and see if I could heal.
But I cannot just leave you, coz ******* are real.
It is like I had to get cut to hold the sharp edge of the knife.
Coz I cannot let you go because you are my life.
Im sorry if I cannot forget about it now.
Im sorry if I remember it somehow.
My heart is still breaking and I dont what to do.
Maybe only time can heal and the efforts too.
Don't give up on me, Love.
You're the only thing I have.
Many have left and I lost track.
But Please wait for me, I'll be back.
I wasn't supposed to deal with the problems coz I havent done anything wrong.
You had a mistake for not being strong.
But i realized, we are partners and we are one.
That means both should deal with what the other one has done.
I had my mistakes, perhaps you'll say.
But whatever it is, Im sorry anyway.
I love you Love and I always will.
Please wait for the time when I am healed.

— The End —