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GraciexJones Dec 2018
It’s hard to admit,
When everything goes to ****,
I am addict,

It’s always been this way,
Started at a young age,
Sugary sweets and red wine,
Cider and champagne,
Pumping chemicals into my little brain,

I never really understood,
The impact it would have on my adulthood,
The alcohol soaked in my veins,

My friends had started to notice,
Each party would become exhaustion,

My friends had started to notice,
I was trying to up-hold this notion,

My friends became distance,
I couldn’t keep filling this emptiness,

Flourishing myself in ecstasy,
Of pleasure and dreams
Treated as a remedy,
To escape from my reality,

Morning after,
Sunken eyes,
Wondering the streets of Brighton,

I promised myself I wouldn’t do this again,
I couldn’t understand,

Why I stood with the pain,
Let myself become this way,
The struggles I hid,
Got worse within time
GraciexJones Sep 2018
Breathing in the air of **** and hash,
Absorbing the levity atmosphere,
The sun glares down upon us,
Covered in sweat and mud,
Floating through the sound waves,
A dissonance of sounds,
Feeling like a wolf in the night,
An unhinged lunatic howling,
Thriving for a sense of freedom,

Dancing to the heavy bass,
Feeling the vibration from the stage,
Moving my body to the rhythm,
Creating moves, stretching my body, leaping  
Twisting and turning with all my friends,
The bass drops and we pounce to the beat,
The crowd rouse and joyfully move their feet,
A glimpse of gracious placed upon everyone’s faces,
The moment is sweet and clear,
Wrapped up in a bubble of glee,
I never want to leave,

Adrenaline is pulsing through my body,
Amazed by the people I’m meeting,
Dazed by their oddity and individuality,
Hypnotize by their creativity and charm,
Eccentric personalities,
Majestic ensembles,
An honest conversation of TOxicity,
Of past stories twisted with our own memories,
Unique bonds moulding overnight,
A journey of finding one’s split soul,

Late morning belly laughter,
Bathed in a sweat of positivity,
Colliding with emotions of vulnerability,
Drum and Bass music still roaring at 4am,
Fleeting back and forth,
Slowly vanishing back to the camp site,
Reaching for the comfort of my tent,
I catch my breath and slip into in a state of serenity,
Echoes of squeals and laughter thunder in the background,
Sunlight radiating across my skin,
Warmth of content,
I slumber into a deep coma
GraciexJones Sep 2018
It feels like a battle,
Me and my mind,
I don’t want to be the kind to run and hide,
I hear myself quick to judge,
Not only myself but others

I want to be kind and strong,
Adapt to society,
Be comfortable in the skin I walk in,
Protest for my rights and equality,
Raise my fist,
Stand up for what I believe in,
Without being afraid anymore

Instead I look at myself in the eye,
Wonder why I am so flawed.
I failed to see the wild flower inside,
Full of ambition and desire,

Walking around holding my breath,
Repressing my natural feelings,
Supressing the layers of my ego,
Unwilling to follow my intuition,
Repetition of the same issues,
Waiting to be consoled,

I want to wake up.
Accept my place on this earth,
Thrive within my creativity,
Be a decent human being
Share my vulnerability,
Reflecting on my mentality,
Working through my past tragedy’s,
Reclaim my identity,
Get rid of the toxicity,

Recognize my flaws,
Break down these walls,
Reach out for communication
GraciexJones Dec 2018
Sitting on the beach on the coldest of days,
Winter chills which skims across my face and hands,
Watching the waves rising up and down,
Beating against the shore,
Roaring against the wind,
The smell of open sea rises across the land,

Birds are fleeting above my head,
Glimpse of the sun is peeking through the clouds,
My partner is drawing characters in the sand,
I run my hands over the seashells and tiny rocks,
I explore a combination of sharp edges and wet stone,

A misty gloom appears along the coast,
The sound of seagull’s squarking and dogs barking echo’s in the distance,

My partner lights a cigarette and sits across me smiling,
We hear the pitter-patter of a greyhound dog walking towards us,
The greyhound greets us with a curious gesture,
We welcome the dog with open arms and stroke their furry face to say hello
The grey-hound pondering between us,
Excitingly moving around,
We hear the sound of people talking in the background,
The grey-hound wonders off to accompany their owner,

A shift of temperature occurs in the atmosphere,
I feel the cold cracking my lips,
My partner begins to roll a spliff,
I contemplate about the warmth,
I propose we hit the Carrot Café along our way,
My partner agrees as he smokes his doobie
We get up and set upon our next journey.
GraciexJones Jun 2021
She says 'Honey I’m home' as she enters the room,
One life destroyed 7 lives left,
Ready to feast and fight,
She is the dictator of her fate,

She lusts for the crack of the whip,
The thrill and the thrive as she chases her victims,
The squeals and the cries as she plays with them,
The heightened experience of being alive,

She is one hot kitty-cat waiting for her prey,
She doesn’t want Batman to get in her way
She pins him to the ground and places a deadly kiss,
Upon his pouty lips under the Christmas mistletoe,

She cracks the whip once more as she scatters into the night,
Cleans her wounds and purrs softly under the moonlight
But she did not realise she left a fragment of her soul,
A piece of a kitty-cat claw which is stuck in Batman torso

Poem by Gracie Jones
GraciexJones Oct 2018
The two brothers wait for me arrive home,
They call themselves Anxiety and Fear,
Fear with his grimace smile,
Welcomes me in with his rigid glare,
He takes one look at me,
Reminds me I am vulnerable and fragile,
Anxiety plays along,
With his insolent tone,
Tells me I am an ignorant fool,
Mocking me of my wisdom,
Fear reminds me I am blind,
I know deep down they are right,

Fear is talking with a big smile to Anxiety,
The two brothers begin to laugh as I sit and calculate,
My heart begins to ache,
Anxiety points out the truth,
I can’t deny how I went wrong,
Fear places his hands on my shoulders,
I start to cry as I am unable to conceal these thoughts,
He whispers in my ear he will always be there,
Anxiety places his hands in mine
He always said one day I will suffer
No one to save you,
Like vultures they begin to circulate,
I must stay calm,

I rise firm to my feet,
So you want to mess with me?
Fear retreats to the corner and hisses,
It doesn’t matter what you have to say,
How long you keep these thoughts at bay,
Anxiety continues to linger around,
Analysing every inch and sound,

I was naïve and innocent to follow to your dark psyche,
Fear attempts to shut me up,
Yelling nonsense in my ear,
Anxiety joins in playfully,
Twisting and turning my stomach,

I take a deep breathe,
I will not follow blindly to the devil in disguise,
I will not tolerate these fears and let them ride me,
I will not let anxiety take over my strive,
My devotion will be dedicated to creativity and insanity,
You are just made believed.

The two brothers wince at my capability to be brave,
Anxiety recoils and hallows a piercing shriek,
Fear grimaces and spits venom at me,
I catch the venom and throw it back at Fear,
I owe you nothing
GraciexJones Jun 2021
I see you standing across the lake of fire,
Your body caved in wire,
Your eyes are the colour of black sapphire,
The excess of your skin begins to peel,
Your teeth are the colour of molten steel,
My heart is squelched in your hand,
You stare at me with hedonism,

Your long tongue runs along my heart,
You quench for the thirst of my self-worth,
Your long nails stretch and twinge my arteries,  
Feels like the blood boiling in my pancreas,
I fall to my knees and let out a harrowing scream,

Blood dripples down from my mouth,
My teeth begin to spill out relentlessly
My soul is inflamed by all your greed,
I force myself to get up and plea for my worth

You rupture into a lowering laugh,
Which punctures and disrupts the earth
A black desert storm erupts and crackles,
The dense grey clouds oozes and bellows,
Heaviness of dust grain fills the atmosphere,
Creating a wheeziness and tightness in my chest,

I try to escape from the feeling of desolation,
A sensation of electrocution shocks my neck down to my spine,
My brain shivers and flips as an electric shock hits again,
An odour of burnt flesh pollutes the atmosphere,
My skin fades into a texture of black charcoal,

Feeling debilitated,
I fold and recoil into myself on the cold desert floor,
A wave of emotional pain creeps over my body,
I chew on my lower lip as my eyes swell up with tears,
My stomach churning and swirling with nausea
I close my eyes as the tears gush down my cheeks,
Lips trembling as I grip my sleeves for comfort,

Moment of silence as I weep into my hands,
I hear a deathly, low and sinister whisper in my ear,
“It’s over now….”
My swollen pallid eyes look up to see,
Their carcass shrivelled legs standing over me,
“Surrender...” they whisper with a devilish smile
GraciexJones May 2019
A reflection of my human flesh,
I trace a mixture of scars and wrinkles,
I see crinkles around my eyes as I smile,
Each mark follows a story,
Of spontaneous ****** piercings and tattoo’s
Garnishing my body,
Covering the blues of desperation and release
From times of birth control,
Inserting pills and implants,
Hormones spilling from my insides,
Shaking my hairy legs and ****,
Dancing in the bathroom,
As I noticed the shape of my hips,
Thighs are squelched together,
My hairy toes wiggling underneath the furry rug
I tug at my skin as it itches again
My hair is dangling all wired and dry,
My perspective of my body -changes all over again,
Like the weight of my belly hanging over the sink,
As I brush my teeth between the crooked gaps,
When I pluck the hair flaring from my brow,
Each zit popped with enthusiasm,
Each mark has a reason
GraciexJones Jun 2021
My eyes can't unsee what I have seen
A dying man sat in front of me
His mind was battling the inner demons inside,
He thought he could control his psyche and swallow his fears

His hands clasping so tight to his open chest
The shadows on the wall reflected a sorry state of his sorrows
I wanted to give him more hope,
But I stood there and froze
Awoken by his vulnerable presence

His large eyes became pallid and sunken,
He dazes into the distance fighting to breathe,
He could hear the demons howling his name,
I tried to hold his hand which became rotten and decay,
He whispers the words 'I can't do this anymore' his hollow face sank to the floor
My heart fell into pieces as he closes his eyes,
I didn't want this to be our last goodbye
GraciexJones Jun 2021
I wish you could see me for who I am
Not just a stranger or an acquaintance
I wish you would give me a chance,
Know that I am worth your time,
Not to take one glance,
Brush me off to the side,
I wish all my hard work amounted to something,
But it really doesn’t really mean anything

I wish my past experiences didn’t taint me.
That I could open my eyes,
Realize this isn’t the way it has to be,
I wish I could talk to you openly,
I wish you could be honest with me

I wish we can lie under the stars,
We could talk about all sorts,
Music, literacy, creativity and astrology,
Discuss the dimensions of the cosmos,
How aliens plan to take over universe,
Corrupted politics
How the world is going to ****,
What we are planning to have for tea tonight.

I wish I could take a step back,
You can tell me it’s all going it’s be alright,
That life has a way of orchestrating moments,
I wish knew how to comprehend,
Everyone’s ******* reasons,
I wish I wouldn’t waste my time.
With permeant blues and drinking *****,

I wish you would see now,
The implications in our problems
Grinding till the day we die,
With a life we hate,
I wish we could wind down,
Just smoke a doobie and have a laugh,
Stop asking why
GraciexJones Sep 2018
Day after day her sanity peels away,
Living to fight another day,
Her hunger stirs inside once more,
Murky shirt is hanging loose,
Her face and hair covered in grime and dirt,
Clothes ripped and worn,
Her skin is withered and torn,
Physically craving meal,
Weighing 10 Stones lighter,
Sockless and penniless,

Time keeps slipping away,
Feeling the weight of the world on her shoulders,
She lays there on the hard concrete floor,
Feeling scared and alone
Looking over her shoulder,
Terrible fears plague her,
In this place she calls her home town,

Strangers walk by gawking,  
Analysing her vulnerability,
Criticizing her capability,
Paralyzed by her identity,

Stability is what she is hoping for,
A facility that puts bread on the table,
But the system shuns her away once more,
She grasps onto her faith in fear it will start to crumble,
A sense of purpose to stay alive

She sees a familiar man standing by her side,
He offer’s his hand with a welcoming promise and smiles with a high-spirited expression,
A sense of warmth and belonging races through her body,
She traces his wrinkles on his face,
His eyes are hazel-nut brown,
His hair and beard is frosty white,
She recognizes his smell from when she was a child,
A scent of incense and lavender,



He gently rests her cheek in his hands,
Sadness fills up in his eyes,
He glimpses into her shattered soul,
The grief which had burnt a hole,
The anguish deep inside,
Tears trickle down his face,
There a stands a man of her heart
Homeless victim in Brighton street
GraciexJones Jun 2021
She inhales a huge chunk of the chemically bitter white gram,
Shouts 'I said GOD DAAAAMNMM! GODANM' in the woman’s toilet,
The women snare at her and she beams a grin as she wipes her nostrils clean,
She strolls back to the same uncomfortable silence she had originally left,
A man with a face like a slapped *** and small crabby eyes stares at her,  
He lights a cigarette and continues to ask her questions about Mr Wallace,
She angelically takes a sip out of her £5 dollar milkshake,
An announcement storms the room “JACK RABBIT TWIST CONTEST”
She glares at him with an excited smug expression,
The man profusely refuses,
She pulls at the chance and says “I want to dance, and I want to win a trophy”

She centres the room with her bold presence,
Introduces herself and the man to the audience,
Chucky Berry 'You never can tell' dawns the room,
She strikes a mixture of aristocrats dance poses,
He follows along whilst wiggling his legs and arms,
She twirls and moves closer to him,
She spins and rocks the swimmer move,
Thrusting her chest towards him,
He drops into the mash-potato dance
She shakes her *** and struts her feet,
He jiggles into faster swings and sways his hips,
Captivated by her flow and energy,
She becomes entranced by his charisma,
The two intwine like a wreath of flowers,
She devours him with her blood shot eyes


The song comes to an end,
The crowd roar with excitement,
She beams at him with pride,
He shyly smiles and bows down with Mia Wallace
GraciexJones Jun 2021
You shiver with content staring into the sea,
Reminiscing over past events which have shaped your life,
All these mixed feelings twine like spider webs,

You linger for a hand in the darkness,
A comfort you once had,
Seeking for a connection you left behind,
Feeling so far away from your mind

Often feels like a clouded view,
Of not knowing what you need,
Rather than knowing what you want,

As the pebbles hit your feet,
You hear the storm coming over from the cliffs,
The grittiness of the cold bites your lips,
You slowly move towards the sea edge,

Arms spread wide as the strong breeze hits,
Wind pushing hard against your hips,
You steadily moving further closer to the ambush of waves,
The shore rumbles and roars,
Spraying salty sea water across your face,

You stare above to see the burning moonrise
The moon widens like a Cheshire Cat smile,
You somehow feel safe and content,
Able to confront the anxieties,
Which have been growing from inside
GraciexJones Mar 2019
They say count your blessings when you are in a moment of uncertainty,
I bury my head in those moments of anxiety,
Again and again,
Unable to comprehend or justify my capability to get through this,
Tackling to appreciate what is in front of me,
Grinding through this belly ache,
Doubts are swirling in my stomach,
Palms are continually sweaty,
I strive to keep my calm,
Feeling disarmed and un-steady,
I keep telling myself this will be a positive change
GraciexJones Jun 2021
The Queen sat alone in her throne,
Drapes drawn across the window,
Sputtering candle flame by her side,
She sat there holding her heart in her hand,
Looking down she could see the veins are bruised
The colours red and blue had turned into a pale complexion,
Tears fell down her cheeks,
She starred up to see a red tapestries hanging above her bed,
The design on the tapestries was beautiful scenery,

The Queen remembered when she received the tapestries,
It was a gift from a sailor of the sea,
Each month he would come knocking on her door,
Sit down by her thrown and tell her of his adventures,
The Queen longed for those stories from the Sailor,
As she was unable to leave her castle to see the beautiful lands,

One day,
The Sailor had left her a gift,
He told her he would be going for a long trip,
He may not return for a while,
Queen took a deep breathe,
As she knew this might be the last time,
The Sailor insisted for the Queen to look at the tapestries,
To remind her of how beautiful the world can be
GraciexJones Nov 2018
Diving into my insecurities,
Replaying the same mistakes
Unfolding memories from the deepest crease,
Mesmerizing the unforgettable words
Reminiscing over faint situations
Tears trembling down my face,
A wave of nerves tip toe down my spine,

Tearing my mind into pieces
Thoughts are scattering around,
Blemishing the good thoughts
Peeling away the flesh of my sanity,
Revealing layers of my anxiety

Losing sight of what’s right
A misunderstanding of my identity,
A willingness to be distant
From the people I love dearly
You
GraciexJones Jun 2021
You
You’re a storm in summer,
So fast-moving and out of the blue,

You’re like the first day of Spring,
Blooming and slowly rising,
Amongst the decomposing earth,

You’re like a shifting darkness,
Hard to tell where you start and begin,
Filling the space with your whole being,

Your firelight flares up like a firefly,
So bright and fluttering through the twilight,

Your eyes glow with a glace of gold and rose,
So fired up on adrenaline,
Running through the countryside like a wild fox,

Your depression is like the deep artic sea,
When it gets so heavy you crawl into your shell,
So desolated with your own thoughts

You’re like a broken violin,
So beautiful but splintered with visible scars,
From the lovers who had misled you in the past

— The End —