The Big Bang
the way you slam the door
I just ignore
because I want more

The Big Bang
what you do to my heart
when we are apart
I'm under your spell
like a dart to a board

The Big Bang
when you drag your cigarette
stay for another hour or two
maybe we can listen to a cassette
Who knows whats next?
the universe and I are just as complex

The Big Bang
standby
the derby can still fall

The Big Bang*
is the reason I survive
but the reason I'm alive
is because you arrived

I don't want to be perfect
What an incorrect prospect
I like my defect
At least I'm not an object

My eyes do not resemble suns
My words are more like guns
Aimed at your sons
I've only just begun

My hair is not soft and fine
You simply cannot define
Or enshrine
Standby and do not whine

My thoughts are not innocent and pure
Nothing is secure
But I am certainly not your saviour
My behaviour brings danger
I am not your entertainer

My hands are not are not flowers
I have different powers
Which devours and towers
Over your mouth as he cowers

Nature is not just beautiful
And neither am I
How dare you belittle it with unsuitable lies
Save your goodbyes
I am not your demise, that would be unwise
Do you not realise I have a disguise?

I am not  perfect
Yet you could never recreate and resurrect my imperfections
Save your affections
I need to find my own directions, away from your infectious reflections

Vulnerability is scary
I guess that's why I'm always wary
In the palm of another's hand
I solemnly stand

Vulnerability is scary
Someone I know barely
They could *bury me
In debris

I'm flesh and bones
Their words could be stones
The way you shake when you're crying
Or when you blink when you're lying
Because inside you know you're dying

When I tell you how I feel
I may begin to heal
This is so unreal-
Yet I still fear that you will squeal
What I tried so hard to conceal

Vulnerability is scary
I would like to say contrary,
I feel like a freed canary
How very wrong
I've made another prison
With bars made of vulnerability

My secrets have become a liability
For I foolishly trust
You will not run
When we are done

Vulnerability is so scary

I vaguely remember our car rides together
I wished they'd last forever
We drove around singing Queen
Imagine what could have been?
I'm nearly eighteen,
I'm beginning to forget

I vaguely remember us at Disney
I cling on to the memory fragments
Reenactments of my mind
I wish our lives where redesigned

I've been told you rocked me to sleep
Where are you now when I'm trying to fall asleep?
I vaguely remember your bad jokes
When I awake you're still not here

I imagine our little conversations today
We could play or sway or you could help me with an essay
Possibilities which will never be
Because you did not stay

It dawned upon me, I have spent most of my life away from you
That makes me feel so blue
I wish we could start anew
For I so desperately miss you