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Spenser Bennett Jun 2016
If there's room
for dead doves
In a million wars
What's one more

Time is too frail
A construct of our
Unable souls forging
Better broken mentalities

Give away the
world and see the
Cloth of love
Undulate in a deeper ocean

Heal us of corrupt scripture
Heal me of my indifference
Separate me from ignorance
That red devil on my shoulder

Shutter step over the
Growing quiet divide
Bifurcating body and spirit
Into dead entities

Our olive branch
Kindling crackles with
Delightful chagrin in
Welcomed self immolation
J Jul 2017
How to conquer the world when you are manic and preserve it when you are depressed.

I had a close friend send me a text a few weeks ago
Reminding me how to breathe and that I had to get out of bed,
I thought if she could have read my mood from the west coast
As I rotted in cotton comforters in the east, I must have been pretty obvious
Maybe it’s because we have been friends for ten years or because
I plaster every up and down online to vague audiences, I cast out my emotions
Like frayed fishing line, trying to catch even a glimpse of someone who relates.
But when this friend texted me she said something that might help balance out
The high-highs with the unbearable lows is writing how I feel when I am both.
I did my best to put the feeling of flying at 100mph upside down with wings made of silken sheets into words but the minute I did they turned into wings of concrete and I lost my focus again. And so I went to answer my friend and I said ‘here is how to conquer the world when you are manic”

I am caffeine therapy,
engulfed in energy
I am yellow, I am green
I am everything at once,
I feel everything all at once.
Did I mention?
Hey, I'm really excited to tell you
I’m gonna save the world,
All of it.
Today.
try and stop me.
I woke up at 4 this morning
Watched the sun swallow shadows
Like it was yearning for something dark
To balance itself out.
Too much light is dangerous too.
I always like to watch the sunrise before I go out to save the world, Waking up early always gives me so much more time And today I will do a lot,  I want to save the world. I hope you know I'm going to.

I am yellow, I am green. I am everything at once.
I am traffic jams spread out across freeways,
I am six trips in a row to the same store because I kept forgetting what I needed,
Music playing so loud you can’t hear anything else
I wash down amphetamines with coffee
I am now Narrow energy. I'm traveling a perfectly paved road Home to a room where I cannot see the floor, but that’s okay because I’m
Going to save the world today.
It doesn't matter how fast I'm going as long as you see me get there.
I am validation starvation in calorie counting notebooks,
I am looks from strangers whose eyes wonder loudly how I got marks on my arms or how I'm bouncing my foot like energy is spewing out my body but still have bags under mine that insinuate exhaustion I never learned how to overcome.
I am a math equation stuck inside the text book
From that semester I dropped out;
I am heat energy dancing inside shattered beakers, I am weathered worn out sneakers still being used because it’s hard to let go,
I'm kissing catalytic conversations with those I love because I need a reaction to feel like they're listening,
I am potential energy ready to become kinetic,
I am energetic and today, I have the heart to save the world.
I am off track, my bad. Its like an “ADHD starter pack” but there's no warranty or handbook.
Anyway, I started by re-enrolling in classes because I have always been good at school,
Except for when I stopped going but I have always been good at school and I can understand why everyone around me might expect me to succeed, I emit determination from my mouth when my heart feels empty, but I did sign back up because
This time I'm ready, and this  time I won’t ever feel low again, I think i beat it finally
I feel it in my bones as I cross busy streets without looking either way
I'm invincible and incredible
I am yellow I am green
I am hydro energy feeding off the
Big deep blue sea,
I am gratitude as an action
Not a trinket I can break
and today I will save the world
and tomorrow I will not be low,
And today I will conquer my fears, all 647
And tomorrow I will tell my friends I love them
And today I will remind myself that skin cells
Replace themselves every 28 days
So I only have to wear long sleeves for that many more
And tomorrow I will wake up and do my homework
And today I will surely save the world,
I will never feel so low as I have ever again
How could I when there is so much to smile for?
I’m laughing so loud my neighbors are asking,
And my friends think I’m doing better and I tell them I am. I am.
I am yellow, I am serene,
I feel it in my skin that I am better
recovery feels like Holding hands at sixteen and iced tea, And this is easy!
I am yellow, I am green.
I am yellow, I am green.
I feel everything all at once.
floating between causes, altruism is a virus, slithering through my veins, celebrating how much I will do today. Did I mention how much I will do today?
I'm going to save the world.
After signing back up for classes I spread out my day like magazine clippings I'll never put onto a “dream board” because I will most likely forget about them, my dreams make better notes in my iphone where I can see them
As I check my contacts to see who I can talk to today. Or who will listen. I wonder who will listen. Or what kind of game I will play to make someone listen.
I am yellow, I am green. It’s noon and I am flying.
Here is how else I will save the world:
I will make sure I save myself first,
I'll clean my room and go to the gym
work off three weeks of sweets with three hours on the treadmill, I forgot how good it feels to run and I know that this is the last time I will ever, ever give up.
I’m better now. I run on a track that loops back in on itself because I find comfort in knowing it will always return no matter how many times I lose sight of where I'm going, I would get lost were I to run outside because when you are everything all at once you seldom stay in place, God there is just so much to look at. I will never look back at who I was even as late as yesterday.
I get lost inside rubix cube mentalities and short lived craft store hobbies, but I'm better.
I am yellow, I am green. And today I am going to be a wildlife photographer, And an artist, and when people ask me what I want to be I tell them
I will work for the United Nations and that I am going to save the world, they believe me and ask me how I'll do it and I realize that I have yet to start saving the world.
I woke up at 4, so sure today was the day,
I felt it in my heart like the time I took two of my adderalls by mistake because I forgot that I took one that day, I felt it and it was real. Throbbing like a bump from falling but real. I lost track of that feeling for a second and now it is fleeting.
What is happening?

I am yellow, I am green.
I am yellow, i am yellow I am yellow,
Are you still listening?
I'm potential energy locked inside a pendulum
Hanging from a chemical tree that dies fast and grows slowly, Im staggered progress dressed up like empathy, I'm baggage too heavy
I am yellow, I am green.
I am fleeting energy
The kind that sparks a few times
On telephone lines turned pink infront of sunsets in july, gone before your friends can see it too.
They never really see it, too.
I am yellow, I am green

I forgot to shower every day this week but
I'm too tired to get out of bed,
What is happening? Can you remind me what I was doing?
I was supposed to save the world today
I’m sorry.
I was really going to save the world today
I'm taking in as much caffeine as I can without
Making my heart feel like it will push its way
Through my ribs out of my chest
Though being able to feel in my chest again
Might not be so bad. I’m stuffing smoke inside my cavities to fill them up, doing my best to keep feeling inside the skin I wear when I can feel it
Going numb, even it hurts at least I can feel it, I wish I could inject caffeine right into my veins,
I wish you could jump infront of moving trains without Hurting everyone on board,
I wish I felt less like this but I wish I felt more,
I reread texts from last night where transitioning
Felt like fist fighting recovery, her having one up on me,

I am crimson, I am grey, I am fleeting energy.
I’m so sorry.


I thought I said that before
And I might have but I forgot, I feel cloudy
I stumbled through steel wool tall grass to make it
Out of bed today and the weight of every single mistake I have ever made feels like it will surely break my spine Right in half, I don’t know if I will make it through today.
I wish someone would save me today.
I am crimson, I am grey.
I need someone to save my world today.
Tyler King Oct 2015
I.
The people look like flowers at last - sick thoughts of dead men strike the clock winding backwards and ignite to illuminate my approach,
The people look like,
Cigarette burns,
Bullet wounds,
Casualties of Rollins' war with himself,
Of Ellis' numb utopia,
Of the Bukowski cynic suicide,
Of the thoughtless progeny of deadbeat generations desperate to push back,
Every street corner is holy, baptized in the blood of those who died believing,
A thousand fists moved to release a thousand frustrations, and a celebrity endorsement for each overdose death,
Angel mine, abate your gutter wars and mob mentalities,
The tattoo ink has dried and the clubs are closed for the night,
Where are the revolutionaries to go now?

II.
The revenge of the skinhead minority,
The born again soul of a fallen brother,
The madman defiant in publicized rage, the faces of the enemy painted with crosshairs on TV screens,
And the damaged finally able to stand on their own,
Damaged and unrepentant,
Damaged and brilliant,
Damaged with criminal record eyes,
with paranoia brain, with X's tattooed into calloused knuckles,
with track marked arms,
Damaged, the unstoppable tide of the righteous youth - caricatured in the spray painted stencils of their testaments

III.
The spoiled children of an undefinable zeitgeist with nothing to lose,
In ecstasy binges these angels hallucinated manifest destiny through non prescription lenses,
Studying traffic patterns I remember how people are afraid to merge and everybody is looking for just the right amount of trouble,
A fire dies and another is born almost immediately,
Careless ramblings in careless county - a land I'm sure was promised to someone, somewhere, sometime
But after the gold rush nobody could cash out fast enough,
I can't cash out fast enough -
Every girl has got the guilty smile of a teenage runaway living out a Janis Joplin fantasy, and all the boys line up like addicts itching to cop,
The air is so heavy nobody can hold a thought - and when I speak, It's the accent, they say, they can always tell,

IV.
Taxi rides in laser show utopia,
Sicilian saint newly minted tells me about the ******* machine and it's ravenous posturing -
be present & be seen,
Fake it till you make it,
Cop killers singing confessions for beer on the street corner,
While the socialist manifests itself in mispronounced beverages and faux-marked Russian volumes,
avant-garde hyperrealism & ritualistic sacrifice,
There was something about *** and dying on the radio I couldn't be bothered to hear,
A drunken brawl over a bad bet made, disappointing street race, police sirens distant growing moreso,
In ****** bars where ladies always drink free, I rewatch the fall of a ***** old man from the penthouse to the street all over again,
If you haven't figured it out by now,
Don't try

V.
In dreams I walk the Pacific Coast Highway dead of night, barefooted soul alive and naked in the Western night like a Jim Morrison poem, the traveler that never arrives, watching the sunrise form halos over the Sierra Nevada, like a girl I know back East who talks a great deal about plans, the best of which never even have an aftertaste of freedom
There is the same sublime anthems playing on every radio and palm trees forming crosses for any messiah who is willing to claim them,
Last train out of Anaheim as the tessellating California skies swell and give, catch and release,
I see the roofs of tenements lit up by Disneyland,
ocean reflecting the glare from Heaven,
faces of the impoverished reflecting the glare from Heaven,
everybody getting sunburned from the glare from Heaven,
I watch the lovers depart for Santa Ana,
Elderly Asian tourists for Irvine,
Hipsters for San Juan,
and the rest of the destitute ******* for Oceanside en route to San Diego,
There but by the grace of God go the drunk kids spilling out of greyhound buses, sitting till dawn contemplating skylines reflected on the bay, finding romance in every moan of living Earth,
wide eyed at possibility of removing themselves from the equation and finding the answer,
Neil Young harmonicas drift listless above Spanish villas,
Everybody talking like something bad was gonna happen but I couldn't see much thru the windows past the tourist burly shouldered slumbering beast,
I think it was somewhere between Yuma and Dallas, with Mexico stretched out like an invitation to an anarchist rally where I was haunted first,
I'm haunted by El Campo Santo, paved over restless Indian graves in the shadow of the hanging tree,
By La Calavera Catrina blessing the sinners as they pass, hollow faced and sunken on the ***** Spanish streets of their ancestral Apartheid home,
I'm haunted by Calvary, 3000 spirits hanging around unsure of what comes next,
I'm haunted by the faces of the beggars I couldn't spare a cigarette for,
In dreams the Western night releases me and I leave California a shade lighter,
And the handful of stars that manage to burn through the haze seem to promise me:
"You may be gone, but your shadow lives on without you"
I'm sorry about how long this is but it might be my favorite poem I've ever written so *******
Sumit T Aug 2013
From creation ill forever stay in rotation,
Feeling temptations, which slowly turn into frustrations,
Switch feelings, anger turns to rage, which burns to hate,
Words change to actions, fuels opportunities to incriminate

Blunts begin and go clockwise person to person, thoughts get lifted and minds worsen
Mentalities bend, back around the start becomes the end,

I forever stay in rotation, travel from station to station,
Slowly pacing forward to reach my destination
Though from the very start, fates the same ill soon depart
Forever in rotation, from birth to death to my reincarnation
Diction Oct 2018
You can call this nothing but childish poetry if you want/

Because I say this with complete honesty/

Your opinions mean nothing to me/

Looking for the reason behind the why I find in every line of mine/

Without any doubt this empty is me when I'm in my honesty/

There is no lie for you to see when it's all the same thing as what's hidden inside this poetry/

I will say so what if you don't understand these words I write/

I don't care if you can read this pens bite/

Still as oil are these words the paper snow covered drifts white/

The reason my sanity has yet to flee/

Even though everyday I'm looking at this knife as if to find this mercy/

As I'm constantly bordering conformity of this eventual reality/

Lost in my own insanity/

As I'm individually ment to be mentally segregated/

To keep steadily the steady loss of a sane mentality/

As I kept barely shackled separately separate from my misery these memories/

When I deserve every memory intentionally given to me personally/

Specially those made to cause me pain inside intentionally attacking my happiness/

So I'll be honest/

To those the ones who sent them so they can dry the rain with a wipe to clear their eyes/

I apologise/

I'm like Dr.Jekyll holding on desperately to hide the Mr.Hide hidden inside/

With memories of the psychologically unsteady/

Symmetrically simplistic in this coloured poetry thats making up my reality/

Losing myself in some fantasy/

A chemical chemistry of evolutionary perplexities/

Changing the mentalities of the socially closed personalities/

The ones who are misunderstanding me and what's behind this poetry/

When there's so much more then this man and the fact he's lonely/

These poems being what I feel each night/

Why I'm able to continue to write/

Making these words rhyme to fight off these thoughts of some suicide/

Making up poems line after line/

The only thing that makes me feel fine/

It's what keeps me from completely losing my mind during these moments anxiety sneaks up from behind/

So I'm suddenly overwhelmed  emotionally/

It's as if your falling apart and there's no one there that cares/

No one to make it stop but plenty in the part that's pressed to start/

Most days there's nobody to listen when your not sure if your life is worth living/

Sometimes the pain is so deep your needing something to numb every bit of what your feeling/

Now posted on this line paper that's been red dyed/


Maybe the hurt this time someone will see and finally take my words to heart/

Why the ink cord around my throat is still wet/

An the rest of it's spent on this borrowed piece of parchment/

A page from this mental thought process that's afflicted by the emotionally hopeless/

Constantly dancing with manikins of a manic drug addict/

With cut wrist to remind him that weak thoughts need to become nothing but static/

Keeping my mind distracted/

What secrets are you keeping in the attic/

I'm escaping into a straight jacket fearing my own love as the tragic/

When I've finally had it/

My heart I'll bury deep be it lock set with the sunset/

Secret is, the artist is ment to escape within the ink stain that's set/

This is that moment for me be it I'm now word spent so I went while the paint was still wet/
Exotic trollwood harlotry and mule kit blues
Tyrannical tyrannosaur traction padness
Cohort cavorts clastic and witch’s *** hues
Ontological ontogeny somatalogy fadness
Inductive endemic veracities and talus weather clues
Epistemological equilibrium’s homogeny badness
Timeless rhetorical ruminations and ephemeral exigency dues
Transcendent ascensional equivocal madness

Tactile acuity prescience capacity intrepid intrigues
Mystical symbiosis dharma sensorium sentiment proselyte
Torturous tractive prosthesis umbrage ultraism colleagues
Newfangled nocturnal nonchalant nether nestle neophyte
Top notch topography tortoise trauma fatigues
Faustian faux pas foist felicitous fealties socialite
Agnate nous ontological ontogeny euphenics in league
Mentalities evocative introjecting sycophant eulogizing apposite

Mystical terrestrial equestrian tellurian tableau
Panoramic imagery empiricist
Evocative exserted apomixies’ ethereal should show
Ontological somatalogy lyricist
Reflective refraction remissions opulence could know
Theosophy theophany epiphany equilibrist
Magniloquent inductive extrapolation quantum back ***
Transcendent nimbus nimiety exorcist
Re-post
Devil's elbow blues
WHY
Why is the concept of being forgotten so paralyzingly terrifying to me?
Before the expanse of time,
none of us stand a chance of being remembered.
We will be swallowed up,
only be known as a statistic, a point of reference.
The thoughts we think are paramount
Quail before the laughing face of Time.
God will remember me,
so why do I care about what those on earth think?
Why do I care what people think?
What kind of sick ******* are we that we derive pleasure from others' pain?
Schadenfreude is alive and well
Unlike you and I
Why don't I throw up my hands
And succumb to the ravages of an indifferent Time
And an indifferent society
Why not let them win
Who values a game which is purposely weighted to one side
If not those who have waged something dear upon the outcome
The Ender inside me rejects the faulty system.

Why do I persevere for a "humanity"
which will never improve
In fact,
the more we evolve and know and comprehend,
The more apt we are to be heartless
Because why do we need a heart when we have a brain, Tinman?

Why do we care what we look like
Our bodies are merely
borrowed from the earth
And in the blink of eternity's eye
what we call ours
will belong to another

Why do we live in a world overflowing with bodies
And entirely lacking with people

Why can we satisfy any part of ourselves
by draping on borrowed emotions
Why is the false more alluring than the truth?
Show me an honest person
And I will show you an attractive one.

I am not you
you are not me
And we will never be
The same
Despite the pervading effort of our society
I will not be assimilated.

If we let people in,
They wouldn't hate
So why are we terrified of doing that
Is it because,
If everyone is in,
No one is
And in ceases to exist?

Why do we feel the urge to gloat about things we did not earn

Why does 1
Make more money than 2
Because his nose is straighter,
His hair is curly rather than straight,
Because 1 spends an eighth of his time in the gym
While the less attractive 2 spends 7/8 of his time
Screaming inside
At a society which has cut off its own ears that it can't won't hear.

Why are random genes a judge of worth
While character is a word so overplayed
It folded its hand long ago

Why is the face of a beautiful liar
Infinitely preferable
To that of a plain truthteller
Infinite whys
And a world which whispers
     Cradle me with your honeyed lies
     Assurances of past lullabies
     How do I trust what the mockingbird cries
     When even it runs from the skies

Why do so many see ourselves as bound and controlled by manipulated strings
When those strings are nothing but ropes with which we can escape

Why do we live on top of one another
Without deigning to know our prisonmate
Without so much as a spared thought
For the dead flailing beneath us

Why do I hold dearest to my heart
Past injustices
Counting them as the tiny, insidious proofs
That I am a good person
Because good does not exist without the bad
Relativity is the grip keeping us from sliding
Down.
Away.

Why is it that words spoken can never be taken back?
Simple. We can never reclaim what was never ours.
You think you are original in your menial thoughts
What have you done but regurgitate the thoughts of your predecessors?
Rearranging the same letters
To form the same tiresome conclusions.
We are the worst type of plagiarists.

Why is the only thing propelling you a sense of duty
Why are you devoutly loyal to objects rather than the people who happen to hold them

Why

Why do we invent reasons to hate one another
We take solace in the loopholes which justify our hatred
That we may not be like the "monsters" we condemn

Why are "we" and "they"
Not just markers of distance?
Why must they be very real, ubiquitous mentalities?

Why are somber topics the common stuff of jokes
Because we have grown numb enough to empathy
To shun it in favour of a laugh?

Why is suffering so prevalent
When we have an excess of affluence
Are such extremes what define us as a race?

Why is a white lamb the symbol of pristine innocence
When innocence is slaughtered day after day?
Why are sharks abhorred creatures even though
Our vicious attacks
Far outnumber theirs
Do we idealize them that we may have a reason
An excuse
To assert our dominance over yet one more
To feel the joy of crushing them underfoot
Why do we focus on certain images
When the true image of our society
Is the person who occurs each day,
Who breaks
The answer is because we know
that we
Are at fault.


Why when confronted about the tiniest aspect of ourselves
We rear our heads in defense
Backing up against the corner of idiocy
The walls built upon the truths we have fabricated
Why are the swirling armor of falsities so comforting
And when pierced
We rebel
With every bit of the person we have built
Lashing out as does a dog chained its entire life
But even a dog
Which is after all "just an animal"
*Is not fool enough to delude itself into loving its chain.
Some of the "why?"'s running through my head. Like most others, this poem of mine came from a place of severe disgust towards humanity. Enjoy!
Dr Strange Nov 2015
I am my brother's keeper not his reaper
But it seems to me people rather die than survive and become stronger than they already were
Tsk shame on them, shame on me
It is sad that we are stuck in our old mentalities
We rather put each other 6 feet underground than help one another climb a mountain
Slavery may be over but now we are just binding ourselves in these rusty shackles that were left behind
They're cutting through our skin, poisoning our blood, corrupting our minds, making us forget that we have come a long way
That we are not where we once were
They strain us, drain us of all of our energy
Leaving us crawling on the floor searching for scrapes to put ourselves back together again
I understand that we are not where we wish to be
That we still have a long journey ahead of us
That we are still marching forward like soldiers
But it is not helping the fact that a brotha can go out and serve in the military for 13yrs and survive but come back home to his own street only to be shot in the head by his own partner
Then we complain saying the white man is killing us
Hell we are killing us
**** black lives matter
**** white lives matter
**** all **** lives matter
What we fail to realize that we are our own future
Not them
We control what we do
We control where we go
Not them
But if we continue down this dark path we are heading down
Well let me just say we won't have a future
And again I say...
I am my brother's keeper not his reaper
But the way things are looking
We will be our brother's reapers not their keepers
Claire Waters May 2013
walk into a bookstore where a poetry open mic is going on. the man previously nursing a lager in the back now has all eyes in the room on, flowin to the beat like drums to a song, this is all he has left that doesn't feel wrong.
"these words are all that matters," he says. " ’cept poetry, liquor, and the duality of man, i confess, these pages store my sanity and reveal my real friends, so i'll keep writing until these calluses have bled."

Lately I’ve been talking to Michael Larson in my head
And yeah, I know it’s a little weird to have a real imaginary friend
But we all need someone to turn to when feelin like we’re burning at the stake
To remind we’re still human and there’s no end; ending’s a mindset you create
There’s not really walls to hit unless you tell yourself there is,
just the narrow hallways in your mind where you lose yourself to negatives
See, you can always bend to be more
but you conceive a break, cause breaking is what you do
when you think you can’t create

and if you spend too much time wondering if you’re a particle or a wave
your thoughts manifest into the mental circles you repave
self fulfilling prophecies are subconscious misbehaviors
ignoring synchronicity in the universe’s behavior,
always waiting there for someone else to come along and save ya
caving in you dig a shallow grave, crawl in, and lay there,
blaming everyone else and yet expecting a savior?
from the wayward pain of exacerbating these anticipated cracks,
you still can’t seem to break, just blister and bounce back.
from this controversy in the name of your unsure authenticity
each flaw you extract from your skin is your own vulnerability
the world is not black and white, flat, or statistical see
just rife with impenetrable culpability
so everyone grows up and grows out with restless mentalities
time and age are isolated perceptions of our static reality,
cause we’re changing and flowing together, and we always will be
the only differences between us all are the ones we want to see
to comfort our dogmas and convictions as we atomize our selves obsessively
what matters are the paths we pursue and the wisdom we seek,
not our genetic abnormalities or the ways that we feel we are weak
when everything has innate duality, there’s no good without the bad
good’s an infallible syllable completely unpaletable til you realize bad
can only be in your heart if you perceive that’s what you have

there’s just your belief that you are either trapped or free
and realizing you want what you always had, eternally
if I’m gonna live this life, I will not sit and wait,
I will skin my knees and bleed and then get back up and create
In public Michael Larson’s hanging in my headphones loving the attention that I pay
Telling me earnestly not to worry, cause everyone is a critiqued critic these days
In burn fetish he tells me, “empathy is the poor man’s *******”
And now Krishnamurti is on my other shoulder repeating once again,
That “being well adjusted to a sick society is completely insane, the end.”
everyone gets nervous on the first dinner date, and everyone craves the safety of a friend who has their back
everyone feels like a literary hack the first time they take a paper to their thoughts and attempt to translate them into rap
we all feel a bit misdirected, and a little bit hated, but collective requires an equalibrium of giving and taking
while these days everyone treats each other as if life’s just about getting your own slice of the cake
and blatantly crazed by the toxic disarray
of our modern society transgressing and yet we just stand by and wait

Michael looked shy on camera as he expressed to me that, “what makes us human
Is how we’re a collection of our mistakes and the reactions that we have”
And what makes us individuals isn’t our lifestyle or to whom we pray
The stratosphere here that stops us from cooking to convection
is just a collection of perfections formed from love within the human condition
the gravity that keeps us from falling, is the art that we make
self actualized individuals, not feeling so lonely or crazed,
because paradoxically, art is also how we all relate.
How can I come up
Abrupt society
But it's too corrupt
Greed feeds a ***** seed indeed
I'm.the last of a dying breed
****** need to wake up
Shake up before we end up
Bitin the dust trust
Its by design asinine media topics
And bias *** politics
Quick to lock a brother up
For pen profits
Its the new slavery took the chains out the field
And put into a corporate never forget
Where I come from
Deep in slums I was made from.***
Mother and father but why bother?
Tryna make something for my self
When I'm destined to fail
In this west European society
And they ask me why I react violently
Too hearts gone silently
In reality I'm battling the sable
Tryna take off the cables
That's wearing me down frown
Upon the lost masses
They mentality shattered like broken glasses
Hard yo put the pieces together
But if we work as one we can maneuver
The stormy weather
But when the darkness is gone
Shaft of light replenishes the blight
I smoke top flight I never go without a fight
**** the gov yea you know them
The same people that say they love
To alleviate the problems
Make more problems I ain't dumb
I peeps this **** an early age streets are raged
I felt like a caged animals
Cops always in the hood for no good
Drugs ain't flown in by us
Brother put down the guns and bust
Knowledge
Reading books from legal crooks
Like Scarface Elliot Ness and Dutch man
Understand
We can take over if we pull our heads
Our *****
But ya rather remain stuck
Gangsta mentality
Tryna come up
Mateuš Conrad Aug 2022
now that i'm relistening to this track, i remember the sole reason why i worked that dead-end night club job: to earn enough money to buy myself a mandolin... which i did: i entrusted myself to earn the money than to pocket the money out of my student loan... never mind picking up ****-filled bottles from the bathroom: being sexually assaulted by some ****** who thought that long hair was something akin to women and not to old-school metal-heads: which i was back then... you know: getting groped by the *** by some man who later thrusts himself at you while you're picking up ****-filled bottles of beer... oh sure: with retrospect he would have said fellow to my forehead... how times change... well yeah, i worked that job to buy myself a mandolin... which i did... for the sole purpose of learning the mandolin part of Rod Stewart's Maggie May... which i learned and played it for Fiona beneath her kitchen window in the student flats... she giggles blah blah... but... Maggie May soon turned into that other favorite song of mine: And One... Military Fashion Show... perhaps the music is sort of Disco Polo... but the lyrics?

cutest girl behind my door
everybody's hiding in love from war
the beauty broke down their chains somehow
who's gonna living on my body now?

a growing pain within my pop divine
will I ever regret the line?
switching on the light
i will not reassign
girlfriend's girlfriends never could be mine

drop her white pants wide open warm
now she's slipping on her uniform
and every second would become so mis-defined
girlfriend's girlfriends never could be mine

nope, i never had any luck with women, maybe i should have picked up gambling: but then again i don't like testing luck when it comes to being lucky with bus times... i like waiting for a bus for a minute... but with women, i sometimes observe my parents and then realise: ah... that's why i'm not married... makes perfect sense... the idea is lovely: i can never get over the idea of loving a woman, but then i realise a woman also has an idea what it implies to love, hardly a man, hardly a semi-automated thing, something that's offensively useful, from time to time activated but altogether sterile... hell: if it didn't take me playing the mandolin to a girl outside her window: Romeo is ****** as hell... Romeo is gone gone gone... the only luck i've ever had with women were with prostitutes, that realm of evidence where the transactional is up-front... there's no looping of paying for meals for cinema for celebratory self-congratulatory pieces of doodle / jewelry... there's just the up-front "rent" of a body... job done... let's get other aspects of "plumbing" worked on... i'm not even bitter... i'm just sort of: on a snooze button mentality, sort of sleepy... sort of disappointed... that? the men who wrote about love from the 19th century are antiques in the 21st century: not even 19th century folk: antique: pre-historic mentalities of the current zeitgeist of insomnia and over-burdening libido being frozen in a frenzy of self-doubts and self-appeasement of pleasures not met... by the other... i just feel disappointed by having invested so much time in Stendhal in Kundera... seems rather pointless...


i finally picked up my Trek mountain bicycle today
from the repair shop...
i came in talked all giggly and bubbly with
the owners... ah... Hemmingway got it spot on
in that novella of his of short stories:
men without women...
play cards, drink, tell terrible jokes...
make loads of oaths sparingly beginning
with the letter F...
i was told £75... but the guy comes to me and says:
the cassette has been worn down?
your advice? what's to be improved, how will
this affect my cycling?
blah blah this blah blah that... o.k. i know you're
trying to milk me... milk me but don't waste my time...
if it needs changing just tell me...
'oh, but we don't have the parts'...
o.k. ask your supervisor blah blah blah...
he comes back to me and says: oh he have the parts:
SUDDENLY... no no... not suddenly:
the customer, i.e. i... am willing to pay...
how much and how long?
£35... 15 minutes... great! do it! i'll go for a coffee:
which was a lie... i went for a pint
of Guinness and sat by myself like
some ******* portrait of an absinthe drinker
by Degas... they should do one of a Guinness drinker...
a person who sits alone and drinks a pint
of Guinness watching a table of about 5 men
and 1 ****-ugly woman drinking merrily enjoying
each other's company...
with the solo drinker lighting up a cigarette
and lighting up a smile on his face thinking:
oh thank **** i'm alone...
i used to drink with "friends": with people...
i soon realised... they're as much things as much as
i am a thing: sure... dehumanizing...
but so much of philosophy and of medicine
is infuriatingly dehumanizing in achieving
the pinnacle of objective-reason, no?
tell me, am i wrong?
            
i can tell you my favorite quote of mine:
i don't hate people... i just hate things...
it's not my problem that some people behave like
things rather than as people...
reality simply states: some people, simply have not
depth to them, or around them,
they are worse than thespians and thespians
are the worst: since thespians are the most eloquent
of thieves... they steal people's shadows...
they steal other people's soul... essence...
i hate actors with the same passion i abhor
the sceptics... add that to my list:
given these two strands of being and thinking
are the most popular in the current zeitgeist...

so i drank my pint of Guinness and walked back
to the cycling repair shop... picked up my Trek...
listen: i've been cycling for the past year solely on my Viking
road bicycle... neat handlebars...
i used about 4 maybe 5 gears to climb
elevations... or cycle harder: faster...
but neat handlebars... trim... a sense of a tuxedo smart...
neat: for moving between traffic... like all road bicycles...
he gives me my old Trek mountain bicycle back...
**** me!
i was riding a Lamborghini for a year...
now? i'm given a ******* SUV... Royals Royce!
my god... it's a Behemoth!
the handlebars are wide... the brakes? so easily accessible!
**** me for ****'s  sake...
too many gears... i must have been trigger-happy
when it came to gears... must have changed them
about 30 times... three gears by the peddles
and 7 at the rear... wheels... don't get me started on those...
with a road bicycle you have a width of about 23cm...
these ******* where thrice if not more at that...
so wide that they made a sound akin to
me thinking: where's the train? they made this weird
sound i couldn't possibly express with letters
to combat an imaginary words...
the closest approximate is a SHOOM / WHIZZ....
what does a thick rubber tyre make on
a pavement, rotating, that's not insulated
by a frame of a car? what?! exactly...
then add the elevation of the wind...
i simply can't write an onomatopoeia for that sound...
it's not as easy as meow or woof... or bark...
or howl... or coo... or the crackling grr of crow...
gurgling of a crow...
impossible...

tyres one aspect handlebars another...
hands out-stretched... which means? too much
availability of a manoeuvre...
that's what happens when the handlebars
are less restrictive... wide...
you have too much manoeuvrability potential...
you're like that guy inside a London black cab...
you can practically do a 180-turn...
become a dog chasing its own tail...
i used to love mountain bicycles... now?
i ******* hate them... i don't know why i spent
£500 on this piece of junk...
unless... i try it out on some dirt road...
fair enough then... but compared to a road bicycle...
a... kolarzówka... (road bicycle in ******)
no... not going to happen...
i though i was going to be happy to own two bicycles
and change from one to the other...
it's such a beast to ride... sure... it's aesthetically
pleasing to look at... even when school was out
and the boys were coming out of school:
one spontaneously announced thinking-aloud:
that's a nice bike...
yeah... nice to look at... yeah... sure thing mate...
great to look at... but a ***** to ride it...
compared to...                              exhibit (a)
a cheap £125 road bicycle with the right sort of
handlebars... mountain bicycle handlebars are
all wrong too wide...
you just can't handle such a beast on a long stretch
of road... you require something more
gravity driven / prone...
at least with a road bicycle you get to steer
with slight details of force going towards
the intended direction...
i think you must learn on a mountain bicycle...
to then explore the road bicycle...
but let me tell you... one you have mastered
the road bicycle... going back to a mountain bicycle
make-up it like going from Einstein to ******...
i was becoming queasy with too much maneuverability
in my hands and not centered in / with
my entire body and bicycle attached...
i know i'll think differently when i take
this beast into its proper environment...
i know that's what will happen...
but mountain bicycles don't belong in traffic...

aha... right... i almost forgot... just before i picked up
the beast from the repair shop...
i has in the supermarket picking up a bottle of cider
to keep up my stamina of: not bored...
no no... i'm not bored...  

onomatopoeias... i'm sure as a supervisor i told
some of the stewards that i'm only doing this job
for good reference: for references that might me
apply for a job as a chemistry teacher:
since familial ties of references will not allow you
to apply for the position...
last shift at Wembley some pink haired freak
of a beached whale of a male started to mouth-me-off
about jumping the queue...
i retorted like for like: you ******* see a queue
in front of me? i'm standing in the same *******
place! you ******* fearful of being called
a racist: you silly little thing of an anti-racist?!
you ******* HOG of what could have been
a woman... you afraid of insulating the Somalis?!
we know that they're like... that's how African
queues work... people jump the queue...
they huddle... Africans are not a Mongolian horde:
they're huddling people...
they stress themselves by the numbers
they're allowed / are given...
all the Europeans follows some details of
the aesthetic of queuing... the Africans?
**** me... they just inverted the bottle-neck...
if bottles were to be invented in Africa...
they wouldn't have a neck: they'd have an entire
******* torso... and be slim at the base...
that's how Africans behave ergo: think...
that's not racist: that's a ******* anthropologist tactic....
on the last shift this one Indian looking chap
said the following lines:

'don't think me of being racist...
but what do you think of these blacks?'

ha ha... one curiosity after another...
  i love mingling with people: you never know what
you're (n)ever going to get!
i'm working with this one "creature" who's super
clingy to me... adamant that he's anti-racist...
but... oops... slip... he's actually homophobic...
just because Brighton has a "reputation"...
but a staunch anti-racist.... yet a homophobe....
me? i hate *******...
esp. if you're collecting glasses in a night club
and you're getting groped by... some ******...
come on: a man with long hair is no excuse to
fiddle with my *** while i'm picking up bottles
filled with ****... ******* ******!

about blacks? well... what do i care if i already stereotyped
the Somalis as useless idiots... not even useful idiots
of Communist propaganda...
they're like the Irish... you simply psychoanalyse them...
they're so detached from reality that
they might as well be called Moonpeople...
Somalia best be called Moonland...
no, seriously: not as a racist (although i'd love to be one)
but as an anthropologist (these days?
an ethic apologist, if?!)
they are just that... devoid of reality sort of,
sort of... sort of... a sort of "people"...
a sort of "reality" is attached to them...

never mind that... i was in the supermarket buying a bottle
of cider... a woman with two young girls was making
her shopping... some BLEEP emerged from
the cashier's desk... some... BLEEP some BOOP...
hmm... we're talking primary school aged children...
children... completely un-fuckable... although as loveable
as dogs... perhaps even more:
since? you can't exactly mould a dog...
you can't mould a little Frankenstein of your own
with a dog... a dog is kept ontologically within
the archetypical exactness of what a dog is supposed
to be: what a dog is...
but man? oh... that's a completely different barrel of
laughs!
i stood behind the trio... and listened...

onomatopoeias... once those infernal instruments
made those sounds... the two girls mimicked...
imitated the sounds ...
i would be a terrible father... or perhaps the best...
i like the cognitive-focus on the negative:
maybe that's why i adore the cynics...
i adore the cynics and abhor the sceptics...
i like negative-thinking...
i once assured myself that negative-thinking
attracts... positive-being...
magnets... blah blah...

with i have on my heart's "conscience":
something so innocent... the cure's: a short term effect
from the album *******...
no... woman! no!
that trio of curiosity...
i was going to do an in-depth Kantian analogy
of the origins of the onomotopoeia...
it just so happened that i was walking behind them...
i'm pretty good at lip-readings...
too much exposure to headphones...
NEUROTIC BEASTS OF **** UN-******...
the ugliest women imaginable:
busy-body women.... UGLY *****...
MOTH-FRENZY-MOTH-*****....
i'm good at lip-reading...
oh look... a ******* is the area...

no... is just so happened that the trio bough
more goods that me at the store...
silly ******* agony aunt!
no! i was just going to ask
the two girls...that you spoke an onomatopoeia
without knowledge of what an onomatopoeia
actually is!
an onomatopoeia in the mouth of a child
is not actually a word...
it can't be... there's no rigid Apollonian "humour"...
when a child imitates a sound made by a
machine...
it doesn't imitate the sound with an allocation
of ascribing letters to them...
i could be the best father:
and perhaps the worst...
    i'd become too curios... i'd become a naturally
born scientist...
the mother? just ignored them...
but this **** of a THINFG threw empty accusations
into the air as if it were breathing...

i learned one valuable lesson on my own...
there are people... and there are THINGS...
me, what?
you ******* THING! remain INANIMATE!
sure... move... but remain without character!
did these girls have knowledge
of the "onomatopoeia" of an ONOPATOEIA?
too many ******* vowels..

that's Greek for you...
i'm a what? it just so happened that it's suburbia
and i'm walking behind a giddy trio....
i'm suddenly, what?! HIDE! HIDE... you neurotic *****!
you soothsayer you Satan's last **** available!
you mediocre human being!

how would they know... they're already exploring
onomatopoeias without knowledge of onomatopoeias ...
these creatures mimic... in fact: an onomatopoeia
is something that's to be exacted by being written...
these children... they are yet aware of letters...
letters beside nouns... nouns beside the concepts
of verbs pronouns and the like...

first i'll ask politely... secondly i'll ask less politely:
thirdly: don't tread on me..
fourthly: enough is enough...
but that's how life happens...
you exit the mind-set of... it's not jurisprudence...
etymological hell-havoc...
              ah! pedagogy!
and then the reality of all that's around you...

neurotic old women who think you're: an project
you're a predator;... ******* ****-less *****!
i just wanted to hear what her onomatopoeia went to...
you objectionable UGLY CUT of ****!
she was uttering her first onomatopoeia without
a rubric of letters! as a man who's not going
to be a father: i thought that rather: inquisitive...
i know you women are ******* boors and boredoms...
the more you age the uglier you become
in spirit: let alone in physical appearances...
******* hyenas start looking pretty are a while
once you peak!
no! that's the point! i'm being serious!

it only takes one false accusation: lip-read to demand
a crazy momentum of reaction...
oh no no... it's not going to stop!
best ***** assured this ******* momentum
is not going to stop! now i'm grizzly bear tooth worn
on smiling...

now... i have encountered men who encounter violence
of man against man...
i have yet to encounter men who encounter violence
of woman against man...
let's just say... it's more complicated...
i love children... some women love themselves
to the point of willingly perform... what's that name?
oh.... right... has he risen too?
the deity that's Moloch... the deity of infanticide?!
has he? so... i'm not alone...
there must be more of me...
gents! we're being redeemed!  we're going back
to a singing status of existence in the ***** of our
dearest "Abraham" of Ha-Shem!
let's put on a proper, decent, show!

then again... i might: i just might be...
a solo trick-of-treat... bellowing into the depths of well...
after all... as i looked at the whole affair from
the antithesis of Darwinism...
the strong and the smart don't really reproduce:
en masse...
the idiots do...
mammals like insects...
the ill-fated reproduce: that's why they bemoan
their fate of being ill-stocked in genes...
smart people are exploratory...
i'm exploratory...
i'm not saying i'm smart but i'm certainly not dumb enough
to have children in order for them to suffer
unnecessarily... for a per se reason
that's somehow supposed to be self-explanatory:
without... an accountable self!

there's no chance in hell these two girls imitated those
sounds in the supermarket with...
a knowledge of an onomatopoeia!
no chance! speak to me an "onomatopoeia":
onomatopeia!

     ono-m'ah-t'oh-p'-ah!

   they wouldn't even catch the vowel catches of Hs
in the plural sense without the apostrophe...
no...

write me a poem using linguistic notations:
i.e. onomatopoeia: knock knock: woof woof: .
details of some book... frankly? no book...
journalism rules...
/ˌɒnə(ʊ)matəˈpiːə/
   /nɒk,nɒk/
        /wʊf/ /wʊf/:
      /ˈdiːteɪl/ some
/sʌm,s(ə)m/
                       /bʊk/
  
yeah: that's what i like... linguistic graduates...
graffitti artists with a TAG..
children and onomatopoeias...
you want to play more and more games?
aren't we living in the most circus prone times?!

hey! in current environment of events:
hello herr besondere!
drop qords not bombs!

= +- / ha;f and half...
Danielle Rose Jan 2014
No matter what is expected or preconceived
Remain determined
Break through the chains of other's mentalities of what is to be
You are more than yesterday's realities
If you persevere there's no stopping your choices manipulating destiny
A persons fate is not set in stone
We grow beyond the mold of past perceptions
Never allow another to lessen your ambitions
Speak through velocity to prove undeniable ability to overcome and achieve
The cost whatever it may be is worth the sacrifice to obtain your dreams
Carmelo Antone Apr 2012
Hand on the good book that I never read,
I swore my loyalty though you know I like to fib,
Even as your see the guilt gushing beneath my skin,
I’ve been holding the prosecutor’s hand, with another on the switch,

A spineless snitch waiting for the green light to fry you for what Benjamin did,

So sorry this couldn’t have been different,
But the chair only seats one according to our governance,
And I’m not the victim with a scheme preached as providence

So sorry for the inconvenience
But I want to feel the pulse of the pompous cease,
And watch the stillness of eyes that once blinked,
When they found the oval throne of a tyrant
Instead of the virtuous,
The one who was to lead us,

So who’s stopping me from strapping you to that seat?
Since my crime caused the scene
Since your fathers where the ones who put your sons to sleep

Coming from the cranial cracks of the insane,
Those that tried justified slavery while promising us all equality

I am the reason they put price tags on humans
And why this isn’t the land of the free

I’m the governor forcing your loyalty
Or I tell everyone you’re a traitor before finding you guilty,

I’m Uncle Sam’s mistress,
The thought process of social unrest,
When the enemy was a homegrown threat,
When Plymouth protest turned to disobedience,
I was with the Protestant,

I’m the crack in the Liberty Bell,
The judge, jury, and judicial jezebel,

The King, the colonial, the freedom fighter, the insurgent
I’ve once facilitated your independence,
I was your lust for a better existence

Since the struggle against a parliament
I’ve been dealing you an idealistic hand,
Since the election of the forty-third,
I am the notion that this isn’t the promise land
Like a revolutionary remedy
I am the idealistic ******,

The enemy of our mentalities
The thought of defying the constraints this reality
- This poem may also be found on mantone.net
- This poem is the second of one I wrote previously
- Reason for second version: I used this at a poetry reading on 4.6.2012 (so I updated the poem)
- I hope you enjoy
mahea Sep 2013
minds and mentalities
corrupted and broken
from the noxious words
and infectious actions

by the repercussion and influence
of the people we once knew

who's hardened brains perished
and withered away

who's guarded hearts mutilated
and commutated

who's perspective reciprocated
and influenced predominantly
by fallacious things

how will we,
when will we
restore our youth?

m.p.
I know if they found out I'd feel guilty,
Until then I feel safe

And if they found out during the process,
Soul crushingly instead,
But that's just my mistake.
How do I stop these headaches...
The pounding in the center as if my brain is being shaken out of place.
The irritation that makes me pray to keep my blood pressure down because hypertension runs in my genetics.

Constantly reacting, each error becomes a catalyst to a headache that makes me clench my teeth, claw my seat, wrinkle my brows. Instantaneously this frustration reoccurs.

My mother and I alternate the burden. These headaches run through both our veins. Genetically annoyed. Venting to each other of how we don't think our bodies can handle anymore. Our bodies dying as our frustration lives happily and stress free. Just piling her burdens on us. Taking advantage of our need to get things done, advantage of our go getter mentalities.

Aspirin after aspirin. They disappear so fast these days.
JAM Jul 2013
Would you say my words express possible realities
Resulting in different mentalities ?

Or

Are they just written/verbal fallacies
Resulting in abnormalities of letters and words hoping to avoid any literary casualties?

How about both

Sadly, here you can only read it,
So you don't hear it, you just see it, but it's something I'd love for your ears to meet with


Nothing really can compete
With vocal manipulation of speech or how certain pronunciations can proceed

Living through a zub-zero temperature year is what it took for me to be able to reel in my minds cable and see clear
Avoiding a fatal crash I quickly grabbed the wheel to steer
Away from hitting a metaphorical deer

It's not a black cloud that hovers above me
It's god and the devil playing rugby
Every time I try to watch they just stare back and mean mug me

Two opposing forces going head to head?
More like a sorcerer and a sorceress sharing a bed

How many times can a bee sting if it's already stung?
None, it has a single stinger that's the only one
After that, the songs been sung and that bees life is done...

An answer to a question avoiding any deception just so you can understand the expression and find your own reflection

-J.A.M
Rich Aug 2018
Am I in the right headspace?
Do I travel the galaxies conjured by my thoughts just to end up in black holes?
I’m seeking epiphanies
You know, those elusive supernovas that defy even the eyes of gods
I claim to be rich in spirit, yes
Trying to measure my wealth with the hours I spend in the stratosphere
above every worry that injects my bones with the weight of 2 Earths-
the weight of a place that doesn’t want to ever wait
Yet it must
You can’t break a chrysalis and expect patterns on the wings
You’ll get misshapen kaleidoscopes
and fragmented isotopes
beings who’ve never climbed but will die trying to ascend ropes
Am I in the right headspace?
Is my consciousness a constellation waiting to take form?
What will be the shape?
I’ll never be strong enough to resemble the buckle on Orion’s belt
I’ll never be the mouth at the big dipper,
drunk on the secrets of the cosmos
I’d want to be the hands gripping Polaris
sharing light for the planets who only see a moon rise
Am I in the right headspace?
Because I’ve fallen into nebulas,
realms where humans stand on the heads of giants yet look no higher
I’ve seen flawed ideologies that challenge monuments with their size
I wonder what it’d take for us to realize that we could be immortals
free from the finite mentalities that stunt our growth from the very roots.
Christopher Lowe Sep 2015
What is life without something bigger
Are we at the top of the food chain
Or just larger than life
Or to obsessed with it
These mentalities are exasperating

Philosophically speaking

We’ve barely scratched the surface
Of what is called humanity

Honestly
Maya May 2013
Tell me where your dreams roam
when you close your eyes.
Do they bring you home?
Do you dream of cuddling with me
while my eyes close sleepily?
Because I dream of laying sober with you
sharing whispered secrets until two.
In my best dreams, with my eyes closed,
your arms surround me, our bodies touch from head to toe.
And soon, with my eyes open,
we can do that, or so I'm hoping.
Baby, can you tell me what you dream of?
Even if it's not of me, I hope it makes you smile love.
I hope we can connect our sleeping dreams and mentalities,
from Wisconsin to California some time in reality.
Kirsten Autra Aug 2010
Mentalities that leak all over my everything.
            Uncertainty has eroded my respect of self.

Opportunities are disregarded.
Ideas strewn across the room.

            A dose of lies so potent
           It deteriorates my motives, and beliefs.

Struggling to resist the voice inside
that started as a whisper;
a slight breeze in a self made hell.

           I spoke too soon, yet I haven't said a thing.

A silence so aesthetic it takes me to the edge
Where I am vulnerable to only that which is true.

          My demons hide behind mirrors,
          And haunt the corridors of my thoughts.

Their surreptitious plans demand All of me.
I am placed in their pockets, and am considered the favor
upon which they believe they deserve.  

             Pirating my spirit, Robbing my composure,
             They only desire my emotions.

For if they acquire My happiness,
they know,
My happiness is the only thing
that can save me from my dues, my debts. 


This very reason, is why I fight, 

This very reason, is why I shall never surrender,
            Even if I am left with nothing.
Stephanie Emily Oct 2014
I was made to believe I could always improve.
Of course I assumed that meant others could, too.
Because why would we want to remain stagnant?
We live each day like fragments we hope will attract like magnets
And piece into the picture-perfect paradox we call life.

We are driven by this horribly humane curiosity
Accelerating to increasing velocities,
Until we inhibit our ability to realize when enough is enough
Lost in the instilled thoughts that manipulate our emotions with their bluff,
That we should never settle.

But never say never.
As cliches turn into ever-present moments,
We learn that striving is only a component of who we are.
Because if we keep chasing a limit that keeps rising
We’re only chastising a perfectly acceptable being.

Like a cigarette pressed against wrinkled lips,
This vague mantra is a hidden temporary fix.
One that ignites so easily and makes sense to the brain
But never quite knows when to seize it’s reign.
Because no parent has ever told their child when to stop trying.

We fall under control of our own mentalities trying to push us further.
But when can we put the pressure on the back burner?
And try to accept who we are
Before we accidentally discard
A perfectly adequate being.

Sometimes a friendly reminder to advance is taken out of hand.
But my hands have been fidgeting with rings until I brand their bands with indents.
Ones that burn through my skin and leave the memories of closed fists.
The fear of loving where we are or who we’re with should not exist.
For when you’ve exhausted all your happiness and have wilted to your last petal,
I will be flourishing still, for I have learned to settle.
Fah Jul 2013
I have information channeling in from the past through my DNA
i am an open portal to receive the teachings of ancient tantric left hand paths ,
my mother accepted her teaching from an aged midwife with no daughter , she taught her the power of intuition and the secret ways to move between realms without being detected

And this teaching is so secret that only now do i see the lessons,
She wove them into games we played and how she dressed herself , held herself
I run quickly with the tumbling lessons falling out of pasts giant lips painted in the sunset sky ,
i can read the clouds for messages , they never fail , the moon too sends her cool wisdom
i can read people quickly and see through to their highest self , but it takes energy so i must cultivate myself

i am a garden and flowers burst through my skin and out from behind my eyes wild roses grow , to fall into the pit of my stomach and be burnt by the roaring sun inside
after a while the alchemical process subsides and i distill the free magic scent
from which i add a whiff or two to my wrists before i leave home , this is a protection shield of the highest order

take heed if these words talk to your soul , because then you will know i have a message to deliver

The collision of two planes will destroy both ( metaphysically) giving rise to a merged existence that holds qualities of each parent,
yet,
totally new aspects from our current mentalities , thus the cycle can only be compleated when we are ready , each one will find their own turn and preahps a path they would do well to learn is the path of the soul , mind and body

The collapse of ridged belief systems and debt binders ( physically) will mark the border lines , the doldrums where the weak are prayed upon like a pastor dishing out blessings to the congregation

And my friend , in amongst the mess there will be those who would do well to lead you astray , hold fast , as long as you know your own heart the ripples will only fuel you instead of decay

We are speeding up to convergence , can you feel it?
*up to date*
Big Virge Apr 2018
What is it with ... Pretenders ... ?!?
who've ... ALWAYS GOT ... " Agendas " ...

They tend to be ... " Pretentious " ...
and like those ...  " Cellar Fellas' " ... !!!

Use GIMPS ...
to serve as ... " Tricks " ...

So that they can ...

.... " Lick Their Lips " .... !!!!!

Their vibes are ... TRULY SICK ... !!!!!
when it comes to ... How They Live ...

Just let ...

" Marcellus " ... Tell ya' ... !!!!!!

But These Words HERE ...
Aren't For ... " A Flick " ...

" Pulp Fiction's " ... Non-Descript ...
When Pretenders scripts ... Get Flipped ... !!!!!

" IT WASN'T THEM ? "

is their ... ANTHEM ... !!!!!!

They're walking phlegm ... !!!
Who cause ... PROBLEMS ... !!!

cos' they come ... " Inept " ...
with ... NUFF Defects ... !!!!!!!!

You should ... "PROTECT" ...
Yourselves ... from them ... !!!

Their words and ... " Acts " ...
are ALL ....... "Pretence" ...........

So I .... Suggest ....
Your ... Best Defence ...

is to ...
Let Them ... LIE ...
Until you find ...
The Truth .... " behind " ....

What it is they .................................................................­.. "hide" .....

They ...
Choose to ... Lie ...

Pretty much ...

ALL THE TIME ... !!!!!

So .... Politicians ....
and their ... " isms' " ...
are ... NOT TO BE ... Trusted ... !!!

Like .... RELIGION .... !!!!!

I Won't go ......... THERE .........
because they ... FLARE UP ... !!!
Like ... FIREWORKS Son ... !!!!!!!!!!

When they're ... " Questioned " ... ?

So PLEASE ..... Beware ...... !!!
with views you share ....
If you ... DON'T CARE ...
For ... Religious Fare ...

because what they ... CLAIM ...
to be ... " Their Faith " ...
is ... " Subject to Change " ... !!!!!

If they get ... IRATE ...
cos' of ... Things you say ...

ESPECIALLY .... if ....
What YOU ... Believe ...
Shows ... " FRaiLty " ........................

In THEM ...
Their ... BELIEFS ...
and Their ... IDEOLOGIES ... !!!!!

You see ....
PRETENDERS .... Feed ...
OFF ... "FEAR-FILLED" ... Peeps' ...
If you show them that .....

..... You're .... "weak" ....

Pretenders .....
Start to ... "Scheme" ... !!!
to Steal and ...
TAKE ... Money ... !!!

or ...
Leave you with ................. Babies ..................

NO ...  " Sexism " ...

..... DEFINES .....

The ways ...
Pretenders .... ride .... !!!

BOTH ....
Women and Men ....

" Love to " ... Pretend ...

From ... Getting *** ...
To Having ... " Friends " ...

Ask ... " RYAN LOCHTE " ...
About .... DISHONESTY .... !!!!!!

Many .... " Pretend " ....
to ... Get Some ... THEN ...
Are OFF Before ...
Their Victim's ... SURE ... ?
That they have ... " Lied " ... ???

BE WISE ....
.... BE WISE .... !!!

is my ... " Advice " ...

because i've been ... One ...
whose seen them ... Come ...
and even ... INDULGED ...
In ... Letting them ... RUN ...
Their ... "Devious" ... Gums ... !!!

But Trust in this ....

I leave em' ... STUNNED ...
by my .... REACTIONS ....
to their ... ACTIONS ...

They're ...
FAKE Like ... " Factions " ...
Linked to ... " COLLAPsing " ...

..... " Communities " .....

Due to things they ... " Speak " ...
and what they ... " PREACH " ...

ANARCHY ... seems ...
To Feed ... " Their Breed " ... !?!

Mentalities ....
That ... HAPPILY ...

Embrace ... "BIG LIES" ... !!!
and ... FALLACIES ... !!!
That sometimes lead to ...

.... TRAGEDIES .... !!!!!

Like Jane ....
They Are ... CALAMITIES ... !!!!!!
Who ... Break Things ... Up ...
Like .... FAMILIES .... !!!!!!!!!!

because of their ... " Guise " ...
of Speaking ... Their Minds ...

When what they speak ...
DEFIES ... Such Vibes ... !?!

They're ....
QUICK TO ... " Contrive " ...

To Say ....
What You ... LIKE ...
So that they can ... " FIND " ...
Where Your ... weakness lies ... !!!

So DON'T LET ...
Compliments ... FOOL Ya' ... !!!

They're ... " Cute " ...
Just like ... PETUNIAS ... !!!

But REALY ARE ...

.... ABUSERS ... !!!!!!!

Who .... in the end ...
are ... Losers ... !!! ...

Can't you see the ... " L " ...
on their ... Foreheads ... ???

Well ...
Like ... " Damien " ...

The Omen's ... there ... !!!

" The L " ... being where ... ?
Right Under Their ... " Hair " ... !!!

cos' ... Just like ... " Touts " ...
They're QUICK TO ... " Scalp " ... !!!

But Their ... " Native Tongue's "
Left America .... " Dumb " ....

So Look who's come ... ?
YES ... Donald Trump ... !?!

and some other chumps ...
who I ... "won't mention" ...

A ... " ****** Fan " ...
Whose Current Stance ...
is ... Quite ... "pathetic" ...

Just like ... EUGENICS ... !!!!!

They've become ... GENERIC ...
If you ... REALLY ...

Check It ...................... ?!?

From ....

Girlfriends to Guys ....

To ....

Husbands and Wives ....

BEWARE of ... " The Guise " ...
"Behind" ... All Their ... Smiles ....  !!!

cos' it's time to ... REWIND ...
These Lines ... One More Time ...

BE WISE ....
.... BE WISE ....

When These Types ...
Are in ... Sight ... !!!

Read BETWEEN ... Their Lines ...
and you ... May Just Find ... ?!?

A MENTAL ....
Lie ... DETECTOR ... !!!

That'll EXPOSE These ...

... " Pretenders " ...
Inspired by the CRAZY Scenario in Brazil, that involved Ryan Lochte and his pals during the Rio Olympics ....
Julian Nov 2018
The padlock on the continuous barnstorm of a transcendent time whose bunkum is transmuted consciousness aligning with parallax to a congruent worldview is not axiomatic but certainly a veridical property of reality. The universe is as much concept as percept and both properties of consciousness that lead to adaptive behavior are tethered to the eccentricity of the observer rather than the oblong nature of the observed where errors in prima facie judgments delineate the saplings of humanity to beaze under the proctored sunlight of an eternal sunshine that withers seldom to the whims of capricious arbitrage of those whose hubris exceeds the limits of the intellectual frontier because they are gilded with bricolage mentalities that scaffold the skeletonized worldview rather than apprehending the concretism and synthetic arraignment of interrogable reality in a manner that acknowledges the factitious intersection of pioneering understanding and the corporeal existence of realities both transcendent in spatiotemporal mapping and reversible propinquity to the sensible acquisition of tangible knowledge. I contest the worldview of many philosophers as a callow retread of basic logic whose ambition is underserved by a desire for prolix pellucidity rather than cogent succinct promethean formulations that dare to muster the herculean task of demystification even if the entropy of formulation is always flawed by the jaundice of the observers rather than the disdain of the observable consensus. We swing by a filipendulous thread that dangles speculation and reifies the blinkered piebald world of spotty concatenations among neurons recognizing that incomplete associations become the staples of philosophies that are precarious in some logical foundation but sturdy enough to weather the vagaries of the bluster of mendicants who verge on comprehension but pale in comparison to the monolithic edifice of so-called truth when the defalcation of figureheads supplants the clerisy as the new proctor of knowledgeable assertion. I contend that foofaraw is a primeval instinct of community ecology that expedites the balkanization of otherwise unitive properties of society and ravages them with bickering based on clashing predilections that are bellicose and combative rather than irenic and balmy. The acerbic fates of many leads to a rudimentary pessimism or a chary optimism that chides against the fortified exegesis of divinity that can be both proclaimed and stultified for its latticework properties of buttressing society in a permutation that is nimble in some respects but too turgid and rigid in others. The goal of humanity is to become a pliable instrument of a pliable universe that does not rely on buzzword dogmatism or the masquerade of hollow punditry but that relies on self-reliant principles for ascertaining veracity and impugning mendaciloquence with vigilant alacrity rather than casual sportsmanship that reaches finality only upon the handshakes of a battle waged that concedes the impotence of gladiatorial spectatorship as just a gambit of the half-witted cockney witticisms and shibboleths of sportive diversion rather than consequential and decisive reckonings with the subaudition that undergirds all events of any consequence with either a clinched victory or a callow defeatism of a futilitarian worldview that stoops to reconciliation only to propitiate antagonism and buffer against the truculent brunt of weaponized coercion to checkered flags that arbitrate the outcome of a binary polarity of humanized affairs. The majesty of creation is that reversible boundaries can be permeated in a bi-directional manner through the artifice of concerted thought rather than the orchestration of a linear traipse through the deserts of an inclement fate won immediately when projected upon the tangent of any given velocity at any point of acceleration away from the targeted impetus that grants only a partial vantage, a cantle of reality that is fragmented and piecemeal rather than circular and emergent. The most dire battle that humanity faces is the attrition of circumstance by the purposive declarations of imperious authority that seeks to muzzle the ingenuity of many for the deliciation of the few creating an accidia among the clerical institute of thinkers that imposes hogra that few people can grapple with that they are marooned into a cloister that reaps fewer rewards for an ascendant intellect than a virulent libido can clutch with predatory gallops against the also-rans that fight for carnality rather than the ethereal principles lingering within the grasp of many if it became a cynosure of worthy heralded acclaim. We witness the mass fecklessness of giftedness as a shackle of those whose plaudits come intrinsically fortified but sustain none of the abuses that the pedestrians would like to obtrude upon enlightenment to curtail and abridge the art of invention like the coagulation of blood to rob the vitality of throbbing pulse of importunate self-discovery of its macroscopic vista and its telescopic foresight about the future hodgepodge of a recursive fractalized reality besieged by the enemy of linear logical formulations implemented by ivory tower psychologists to muzzle the empowerment of abstruse language in order to make savory the nostrum of the apothecaries of delegated truth bereaved of recourse beyond certain leaps they cannot fathom well enough to flicker with even a faint transient wisdom that is designed to be amenable only to the supernal nature of ideation rather than the caprice of bedazzled humanitarianism. We need to forswear the -isms that flicker with doctrinaire dogmatism and flirt with forceful harangues that exhort a codified message and launch veridical properties of recondite etherealism into an immovable orbit whose inertia can broadcast a singular message of recoil against puritanism in science or skepticism in faith. The bedrock of this message is the deployment of useful extravagance without inordinate delay, the drivel of malcontent transmogrified into the prattle of estimable giants that have stature among the leviathan enough to recriminate against the autarky of self-smug simpletons that infest the world with barbarous indecencies and crude prepossessions that abortively crumple when met with the acerbic teleological gravity of ulterior consequence rather than blossom under the siroccos of manufactured wind designed for windfalls that always create a crestfallen aftermath from the anticlimax of understanding leading to the desiccation of consequence and the engorgement of precedence. These frangible realities become buoyant because the physics of the public dialectic insulates the creaky rickety vestiges of canonical knowledge as a sworn precedent inviolable and immune as a building block of all scholasticism, a retread of parchment recycled over and over again to entrench the past as the titanic vehicle that dictates the future of thought even though the porous inconsistencies of the vagrants of crude formulation make such a vessel less seaworthy than scientism and dogmatism of the monolith would have you believe to be true. The querulous quips of the uninformed predominate with such clutter that the armamentarium against useful idiocy is stagnated into a resigned accord with infernal subjugation of the public volition to insubordinate against a system of parochial enslavement rather than a catholic enlightenment whose universalism of principle ensures a steadfast society guided by scruples rather than undermined by the prickly thorns of abrasive contrition and the magnetism of empathic concern that sabotages the clarity of intelligence and provides a welter in the place of a well-arrayed code of peculiar but defiant distinctiveness that acts as the splinter that cracked the intangible but refractory borders of human inclination and demonstrated the sheer force of golden consistency rather than fickle withering resolve. I exhort and implore the world to heed the best minds that realize the syncretism is answerable to contradiction rather than scuttled from beneath by the impudence of its assertions against the common propriety when it stakes controversy as a gamble to aver the veracity of worldviews that violate orthpraxy with gusto as a brazen gallantry to rescue a foundering planet that seeks disequilibrium in harmony rather than an equilibrated sensibility that is proud to discriminate properly and honestly to clinch fact rather than kowtow to factitious slumber of somniferous kumbaya that is too deferent to maxims that are unduly polite only because charisma supersedes genius in its efficacy to mobilize people to fulfill their roles. With the miscegenation of justice that occurs because of expedience we find holes in many legalistic precedents because they anoint pettifoggery over sensible jurisdiction and face a leaky and ramshackle fate to foment paternalism and divide the clerisy among certain key considerations in order to save face rather than to impose a clarity of orderly supervision that seeks to dissipate the embroiled spiderwebs of dodgy prevarication and quacksalver logic to once and for all ascertain the truth that lurks beyond the primal jaundice of Kafkaesque confusion.
Big Virge Mar 2020
Now It Seems That … NORMALITY ...  
Is Needing Some CLARITY ... !!!  
For Some Within The Family …  
That We Now Call …. " Humanity " ….  
  
But .....  
What Is That … EXACTLY … ?!?
  
When It Now Seems That VANITY ...  
Not Only ... FILLS Mentalities …  
But Seems To Make Most HAPPY ... !!!
  
So Is THAT … " NORMAL " … ?!?
  
When This CLEARLY Leads To … " shortfalls " … !!!
Where Normality Stalls And Fakeness' Draws …  
The Cards That Call For Time In Realms Where Sickness Dwells …  
In The Minds of Hoards Who Are … WAY OFF COURSE … !!!!!!!
  
SICKNESS of The Mind Is Now NORMAL To Kinds …
Who Cannot Decide How To Live Their Life … ???
  
Normality To Them ...  
Comes With … " PROBLEMS " … !!!!!  
  
And MANY Now Attempt …  
To Prove To Themselves That They're NOT Unwell … !!!  
  
It's Not Hard To Tell That Their Heads SWELL …  
With ... ABNORMAL Thoughts …  
That Show That Their Core …  
Is ... FAR FROM PURE … !!!!!
  
Normality And Purity …  
Embrace The Same … " SURELY " … ???
  
Well Maybe NOT ... Cos' NORMAL Bods …  
Who Choose To ROB ... Are Normally Locked …
With Those Whose Plots Felt Shots From COPS ... !!!!!  
  
So Is Your Job A … " NORMAL One " … ???
  
What Does That Mean … !!?!!
When Jobs Like The Police ...  
CLEARLY Indulge In … BRUTALITY ... !!!!!?!!!!!
  
Now Soldiers Are COLDER And Don't Rub Shoulders ...  
With Everyday Workers ... Their Work DEMANDS Fervour ... !!!  
That Deals With Blood ... ALL OVER Their Hands ...  
When VIOLENCE Floods Where Foreign Troops Land … !!!
  
AIN'T NOTHING NORMAL Bout' THAT ... !!!
  
And THAT'S Just FACT … !!!!!!!
  
Death Is NORMAL ...
****** Is NOT … !!!!!!
  
Thus …  
Dress That's FORMAL Goes With Teardrops …  
At Funerals Where A … Loved One's LOST ... !!!!!!  
  
Right There I'll STOP.
Cos' Those Last Words In Poetic Verse …  
May Make Jaws ... DROP … ?!?
  
So I'll Move On And Go Back To … " JOBS " ...
Is A Nine To Five ... How You Live Your Life … ???
  
Or …  
  
Do You Have Time To Sit And Write …  
Through Words That Rhyme …  
Your Views About Crimes …  
And …. ABNORMAL Minds ... ???
  
Now That Sounds Like MINE … !!!!!
  
But Don't Get It Confused … !!!
I've Paid My DUES In Rooms And Offices …  
Where The NORMAL Response Is ...
  
" Do as you're told, until you go home !
Otherwise, don't come to work NO MORE !"
  
Being Treated Like ****** … !!!
To Aid The Cause of Those On Boards ...  
  
The Type Who ENSURE That You Stay POOR … !!!
While They ….. BREAK LAWS ….. !!!!!!
  
Which Seems To Be The NORM … ?!?
For They And Their Friends …  
  
….. " Politicians and Lords " ….. !!!!!!!!
  
Their Normality Sends Some To Their End …
In The Name of …. " DEFENCE " …. !!?!!
  
NOT JUST In Wars ... It's THEM Who Ensure …  
That Redundancy Blends ... Reduce Their Workforce … !!!  
So They Have To Pay LESS And Can YES … Collect MORE … !!!!!  
  
Normality Draws ..............................  
So Many DIFFERENT Pictures …  
  
That It's ... Hard To Be SURE …  ?
Who's NORMAL Or A ... Mister … ?!?
  
Who SEEMS Normal Til' Elixirs …  
Show What DEFINES … " His INNER " … !!!  
  
A Figure Who's A SINNER … ?!?
Or An … ABSOLUTE Beginner … !?!
  
When It Comes To What Is NORMAL …  
In Company That's … " Cordial " …  
  
And What About The Miss … ?
Who Makes You Think of THINGS …  
That Some Define As ….. " SINS " ….. !!!!!
When The REALITY Is THIS … !!!
  
What Once Was YES … " ABNORMAL " ...
Has Now Become So Normal ...
That Girls Be Giving ... " ORALS " ...  
On ***** Types of PORTALS ... !!!
  
The Type Now Seen On Sites …  
NORMALLY ... At Night …
  
Normality Defined ...  
Now Seems To Be … " ONLINE " … ?!?
  
Online Fights And Forums With Designs …
That Formulate Insights Within So Many Minds … !!!  
  
Minds Like MINE …  
Who Are Primed To Find …  
  
Discussions That INSPIRE My Pen To Write And FIRE ...  
Verse That Serves To Explore The Works ...  
That Rest Inside My …. " UNIQUE MIND " …. !!!!!!  
  
See I'd Rather Be UNIQUE ...
Than FIT ….. " NORMALITY " ….. !!!!!!
  
Cos' Normal To Me Is Simply Being … " ME " …
  
NOT … Fitting Into Cliques ...
Or Trying To …. "Deceive" ….  
  
So That I Can Hang …  
In These … "CLONE FILLED GANGS" ... !!!!!  
  
Being … " ABNORMAL " …  
Doesn't Make You … " COOL " … !!!!!
  
So DON'T Be Fooled ...  
Try Being … YOU ... !!!!!!!!!!!!!
  
NOT Fitting Into Crews …  
Who Seem A Bit … " Confused " … ?!?
In Trying To …. DEFINE ….
Like Some Kind of …. IMMORTAL ...
What It Is IN TRUTH To Definitively Be …  
  
One Who's Seen … As Being …  
  
…… " NORMAL " ……
Well, with the people of the world showing themselves to be what they are now, who would dare try to define what a normal person is ... ?!?
Part One

                              A  American Madman's Farwell

I was fried from the scene in LA the lights the fake women with the perfect smiles and quick to jump in bed mentalities that if thinking you were a casting director were all to eager to sell there souls .

The were twisted insane drug addicts maybe that's why I had grown to feel at home amongst them and there demented ways.
I had grown numb to the excess the high quality drugs and all night binges .

My mornings were like rising from the dead more agony than pleasure
I found even now to arise from the crypt it took far more than a stiff drink and a good **** I had to dam near summon a voodoo priestess to bring me back to the living good thing even the masters of the occult all desired to be famous and were already here .

Everyone was after the fast track that quick fix and I was just after yet another story.
I was just another snake in the garden all to eager to take advantage of the first opportunity to strike the innocent then leave them with a expensive habit and some cab fair in the morning .

I sat there as I do now ice in glass bottle on the table frustrated in need  of something more one last adventure was on the horizon .
And my sights were set on the land down under .

Were the heat and mystery surrounded my thoughts where the page could breathe and my thoughts could  take flight one last time .
I sat there a addict in need of another fix one that only a finally dose of adrenaline and adventure could curb my desires .

My choice was made long before my bags were packed.
and few lines and some stiff drinks were all I desired to see this road to its end .

I paid my bill packed my **** and was ready to be lost .
L.A. was a mistake always willing to happen and a new Atlantis destined to be at the bottom of the sea .

I was buckled in  and blown out of my mind as the 747 blasted from tarmac bound for escape pointed towards the sky .
I was higher than Jesus and bound for a story that would be far beyond the depths of my own madness .

Sir would you like a drink ?
The stewardess asked me when we were stable within the clouds.
You can fill in the blank when it comes to my reply .

Just make sure it's a double .

Please fasten your belts ladies and gentlemen the madness will begin shortly .
This is simply a teaser to what will be a long serial I'm working on.
See you soon Gonz
Robyn Kekacs Dec 2013
Abiding in tidy quarters
In which space I will confine
But my life is full of hoarders,
Pack things rashly in my mind

Some more obvious, some more subtle
Seems likely I'll never
See through the rubble.
Rational thought can be transferred
Transplaced
Deterred
Through the nostalgia of a *** once stirred

Finding divets of respect
For those who expect me
To level at their self inflicted debt
Is beyond words that come to be

Break the dams down of succession
Find my daily dosed oppression
Is within the people I reside
I can't run, cause they know where I hide.

Move with me; I've moved with you
Contorted into mentalities by body couldn't do
Just to watch you stay untrue
I can't reflex anymore,
I'm deadened to your dramatic lores.

Done waiting for the progress
For reciprocation past due
Cause I'm waiting to wane this fever,
And the antidote's not you.
Mouth Piece Feb 2015
How many ways can humans prove each other wrong? Let me skim the Library of “i know and i know” i can blow you kisses or punch your face, call you a loser or get you drunk with lips that pour sweet nothings. Sugary or bitter, with noise or dead silence, “your wrong” is the song to be sung. In a castle of pride locked and tortured by criticism, even a friend can turn foe in the realm of ‘i know, i know” But who can ever let go of the self-sacrificial blade that bloodies the soul into the sweetness of unseen pride? OOO our language is tainted with poisoned lips that drip gross mentalities of perfection on earth, something’s killing me in this world of ”i know” So here i go, eating bread crumbs that lead me back to where my heart once was and in that darkness so dank with tears, i found what i really KNOW…..NOTHINGGGGGGGG
Mateuš Conrad Jan 2016
.at this point, in this particular instance, Kant's philosophy doesn't really matter, but it does matter for whatever particulars are left within it for the individual, rather than: labour freely, come and be bed entertainment compulsively sort of man... you can really listen of a psychologist talk, a philosopher will not talk, a psychiatrist will such listen and spoon you with pharma beige and bitter pills... or if you're lucky? porcelain and pale daffodil powder... never mind... the priest will spew his usual *******... the ******* will just construct an idea of a conversation with an O, an Oh-nomotopoeia... every woman is beautiful with eyes closed experiencing an ******... but these days Kantian philosophy isn't pop, thanks to Nietzsche calling the great sage of Königsberg an idiot... i never liked psychology... it was always too sophistry-riddled... rhetoric after rhetorical after rhetoric after rhetorical, yadda yadda yadda... regrets to fans of Nietzsche... i quiet like the the königsberg clock - disciplined man - people would wind their clocks when they saw him pass... and he went as far as 40 miles outside of königsberg... that's dedication... that's discipline... so watching this commando "vs." jordan peterson video... the "warrior-philosopher" mentality: sure... ever get taught martial arts by being kicked in the genitals by your tutor? oh yeah... that really makes you engaged in continuing the classes... a martial arts tutor kicks you in the *******: you become as much an enthusiast of the martial arts classes as a sumo wrestler would become on a vegan diet... "warrior-philosopher"... socrates pulled it off, but he was the one asking the question, not bloated in self-"awareness": the monologue... but socrates is a debate worth... or was he just lucky to have survived to ask the right questions? homer saw the battle of troy... and he was... a ***** poet... warrior-philosopher my ***... what are these, "current" wars about? they're about proxy... proxy wars are not worth fighting... iraq? proxy war. afghanistan? proxy war. libya? proxy war. one proxy after another... warrior at the gym... the actual warriors? on the other side? yeah: they don't gym bro... and they're not custard pie in the face mince meat cuddled together for a bicep... when wars made, sense... you'd get conscripted... but this current pro army classes, coming back into civilian class... oh what tales they must speak... warrior-philosopher mentalities gravitating their egos for a perfect psychology lunch... warrior in a proxy war? dog in a kennel... KA-GA-NIEC (muzzle - chomąto - horse collar - klapki - horse blinders)... i too might have been a... co-mann-do'h... kick in the ***** when learning martial arts? and no sorry? lying in a foetal position? women do that... i heard one story that a woman killed a policeman by kicking him in the testicles... but when a man does to a 15 year old? what martial art is there to learn? well there's only one "martial art"... kick every man in the testicles... for a man to do such to another man... the art became worthless in terms of a learning credibility... even in boxing there are rules about: below the belt... ******* western teachers of eastern combat... so i chose Kant... promenade of perfected timing... orientating himself like a shy sun to each and everyday... mind you: want to lose weight? two options... bicycle or swimming... or the gym: if you want to partake in plastic surgery from the excesses of skin... but exercise is so, so ******* mundane... you'd be better off chopping a tree down or mawing the lawn.

i don't want love to guide my way,
i've seen love being prophetic
concerning man,
and fill man with extinction,
but when i've seen the other card dealing
and have it filled with fear,
i felt a wizened presence of
either my self or god, and i don't
want love to guide my way:
i want fear to guide my treading missing
hoof trot, i want fear to guide me,
whether a fear of god or a fear of loneliness,
i want fear to empower me, for fear will,
i will not ask love for slaughter on the crucifix
i will not ask love for strength when love
gives nil, i will ask fear for all my coordinate
double denial strengths,
that whatever love comes my way
fears me not, even if i should be proud to deny it,
even if i fear it, make love not my guardian
my beacon, not my lighthouse or mountain,
let my guardian and beacon be the fear of constantly
wavering waves of the seas in the ***** of a hurricane:
and my halo will then replicate your ego
concerned with love, simplified by love unfelt
by me in your ideal of love thought: best expressed
by poetics of your kept gentle knees never knelt on.
Kant represented:        0 = negation,
ergo?              1 = sanction
   binary: yes no yes no no yes yes yes no no yes...
how simple: if not beside a coin-flip?
and the man isn't even recited that often
in modern talking points...
good: that gives me a head starts...
like a tortoise being chased by an Achilles...
i appreciate the fact that he's so under-represented,
denied access to a future (reading)
of his work...
  i love the sycophancy surrounding
Nietzsche: it appears that readings of certain
works have reached a cul de sac moment
of saturation, that...
what remains? are pedagogy rubrics of
regurgitation alligned to synthesis a priori etc.,
good to know, really good to know...
but now the intellectual output is not as
important as what the intellectual output
coincides with... i.e. the lived experience
of the thinger... the asceticism that
overpowered the aesthetic...
or rather... how a life dedicated to an asceticism
bore the fruit of an intellectual aesthetic
mostly associated with Kant.

— The End —