When people ask you, what do you want in life?

The most cliche thing they're gonna say is get married, have a family, be famous and be successful in life.

But if you ask me, all I want is happiness, not temporary hapiness but true happiness.

I don't want happiness that comes from pills, or even vices.

I don't want to find happiness from material things, because hapiness can't be measured by the amount of material things you have. Material happiness gives you temporary happiness. You cannot sustain this happiness' cause, one way or another, material wealth will disappear.

I feel like I've been **** in a blackhole, and all I can see is darkness...

I can't escape from this emptiness.

I feel so lost.


I want to feel safe.

I want to feel accepted.

I want to feel that I'm enough.

I want to feel complete

I want to feel loved....

But I wonder, does this kind of happiness exist?

Does true happiness even exist in this world? In a world I still don't understand.

Birthdays from childhood
Are full of celebrations, is understood.

It was not any different for me
Till the unusual plea!

For my 13th birhday
The first time I gave away!

Instead of getting gifts
I contributed to the orphans by giving gifts...

Now I look back to those days
On how happy were they in all ways

I have given tones of gifts
To my fellow companions

But nothing can equalize the happy faces
Of the orphans in their mazes.

Even today I relish
The small gifts I bestowed
To those unknown orphans,,,
Is what which makes my life today
With a brimming hurray!

The way they valued my gifts
No matter how small
They looked at me tall,
And gave the happiest call
Which I would never forget at all!

Those were the real happy days of mine
Which are valued as divine
And will never decline
But I do hope will combine
To give more hapiness: for I define:-
We make a living by what we get
And make a life by what we give!.

I have been chasing
Conteplating
What is truly evil
Is positivity meditated
Or is it truly real
It is a dream sequel
A fight for whats equal
The negative mind
Only thinks of the lethal
What is right may be wrong
What is wrong may be right
Some say that God is black
And the devil is white
God can be anything
He is a mind's creation
An imagination
To keep the positive vibration
Across the land
From sea to shining sea
He is the birds
Hes is the bees
He could even be a She
Who knows not I
I am the one with the eyes
Call it sight
Call it vision
I look up to the skies
I smile
Hapiness will follow
I feel the light from the God of Sun
Call him Apollo
Keep your ears open
Laugh at the unaware
Smile at your peers
Remind the unprepared
Together we can make this world a better place
We can change
Erase sin for dear grace
Always remain happy
Bond as one
Stay strong
Forget the ignorant
Forget what is wrong
Focus on the plus sign
A positive design
I am there on cloud nine
I already found mine

From white sakura in the garden way,
had gone the milky odor sprey.
and icy heart of flooding sense
that is not me ....
that pencil wispered to a paper sheet...
The sun kisses mountines , fields
Reflect on Caspian black waters ...
May be i dream of early twilight moon,
Ridding the pinky horse ....
that is not me ...
that pencil wispered to a paper sheet...
I sent the doves with posts
three or four indeed....but...
They hadnt been read .
may be they still in net...
You sang me the song on the old quatar,
fingers dance a melody ...Habibi ...
Are you alive ?
Then i greet you with hugs
Then ...i will die from hapiness
Just for you...Habibi !
Please be alive ...let me know ....
that is not me ...
that pencil wispered to a paper sheet...

When you're 70, you're gonna look like a piece of flab anyway.
We're all gonna look like a piece of flab anyway
but that's not the point

you're absolutely beautiful. It doesn't seem to mean anything though
I don't quite understand how to make one feel beautiful if they can't love themselves.

Nobody should be killing themselves over goals that are almost impossible to achieve in body image, ESPECIALLY if they're healthy to begin with, you wanna look skinny, then have fun getting skinny, staying skinny and living skinny. Maaaaaaan. Nobody wants to just eat salad. Eat what the ******* want. just don't ******* stuff yourself every time!

god ****** girls, you're all ******* stupid for killing yourselves over this body image thing. you can all be beautiful, as long as you feel good about yourself, but I mean...if being skinny as a toothpick is your ultimate goal. If that's how you think you'll truly achieve your hapiness.

Be my guest, try it out, tell me how it feels when ya get there.

tips: **** what people have to say, if you have some extra weight, but are HEALTHY, then **** them!

if you're truly upset, don't sulk, and do something about it then. Don't be ******* brainwashed by society, SOCIETY IS STUPID LOL. Why on earth would you want to do the SAME THING that EVERYBODY else is doing? I don't understand. You ******* idiots

Love, i know i've been waiting in vain...we are missing things to hold on to,but no matter time or reason, i won't let you go. I can't. It's beyond me,i've found myself uncapable to forget, i blame it on your smile wich hunts my dreams.

How i feel You when i  hear the blues, i got the sorrow on the freezing nghts,so heavyhearted and cold no longer emotion comes from me, except except when i'm with you; hapiness that's what you are.
Ironic,we've come and go but through all we stick together, that's how much i carry you...changes,pain,hapiness, age and even lovers.Yes, i must accept you've made weak and crazy.

You've also made strong, strong enough to let you in and give it all, to be humble and caring.To fight for a dead romance in the middle of our games ,with the rest of a broken heart ,you ,just you ,will always be in every piece of it ,every single piece of the forever.

I waited for long
Only to realise in the darkest hour
that true HAPPINESS lies within

heavenly
tipsy, drinking in
sights, delights, a few odd sides
im intoxified.
swinging around poles, singing gleefully
because of the tall waters,
divine despair
is it too humid in here?
or can i not breathe in this murky air?

headrush,
spinning, sirens whirl above me...
at thirty five thousand feet
to ascend, devour
the happiness, anxiety for a few short--
hours?

click, flash,
paparazzi, lights--
"welcome to miami"
art deco, delight...
on the beaches, slightly still
drunk in nightlife.

laughter, singing
whats the language?
what the hell are they saying?
i hear hapiness, sanity...
at feet, equal to the sea[s]

so watch me,
im merely *******
in english, please... tell me
what is spanish for
"What the ****?"

Today was a good day
it was a good day today
Everygood came my way
No regrets no way

A good day it was
Better than worse
Im happy ofcourse
no fuss all is lax

Thank God for a good day
godly aid kept evil at bay
I got pay  none was coy
Thats why I say

It was a good day
Easy as a pie
Is the way
We draw nigh to our end

In the end its hapiness
So forget the worriness
Pockets may be moneyless take it easy

Ive scaled myself to weigh
lighter than my sorrows
So I can fly away
To find a better tomorrow

Yay
This is the joy
Today was a good day

From white sakura in the garden way,
had gone the milky odor sprey.
and icy heart of flooding sense
that is not me ....
that pencil wispered to a paper sheet...
The sun kisses mountines , fields
Reflect on Caspian black waters ...
May be i dream of early twilight moon,
Ridding the pinky horse ....
that is not me ...
that pencil wispered to a paper sheet...
I sent the doves with posts
three or four indeed....but...
They hadnt been read .
may be they still in net...
You sang me the song on the old quatar,
fingers dance a melody ...Habibi ...
Are you alive ?
Then i greet you with hugs
Then ...i will die from hapiness
Just for you...Habibi !
Please be alive ...let me know ....
that is not me ...
that pencil wispered to a paper sheet...

Yes, feelings ****. Not that I have a lot of them, but the ones I have **** me up, and mess with my brain, body and mental health. The only place I still feel genuine hapiness is with you. I'm happy in a lot of other places, with a lot of other people. And I wouldn't wanna change those moments. But I'm never the same happy I am with you. I've never felt something quite like that hapiness. I used to see you pass by in the hallway, and still, if I pass you by, my eyes light up a little. It used to be hard to find you in a crowded place, now your face is the only face I seem to find. You don't wear colorful clothes, but you always catch my eye. You light up those really dark places, just by being there. You don't even need to smile. I don't think a lot of people see that. I don't think you see that. But I do. And I don't think I would still be able to see in the dark without that light. I'd stumble and fall, over and over again. And it's okay if I have to walk there, alone in the dark, for a little while, because I know that if I'd fall again, you'd be there to catch me. Maybe not now, Maybe not everytime, but someday, in the future, It may be.

I  went on a mission searching Him.
Priests "he abodes house of worship";
Others "you 'll find him in idols";
Scientists "in atoms as energy";
Atheist "let it be.Your pursuit is futile".

Did it suffice me?It only deluded me.
One day, I stood before a mirror,
The secret was answered.

We are clothed with Power ,
fed with beliefs,moved by love.
The cord of Realization when struck,
the abstruse life begins to unveil
Abating the afflictions of the soul.
This cord & the universe resonate,
To give 13th cord of octave - "ecstasy".

Now this phrase is justified;
"The Budda in me spreads to the Budda in you to create peace & hapiness." *Yes he's in me

Have you ever felt
so sad
been sad for so long
you dont even remember when it first started
so sad that you dont know what hapiness is anymore
so sad that there are no more tears to cry out
so sad that your "friends" have accepted that you dont contribute to their conversations because youre just so sad
so sad that your mom stopped knocking on your door to check if youre okay
so sad that you cant even explain why the bags under your eyes are huge
so sad that the word sad is part of your personality
just so sad
always so sad

Shattered dreams
and frantic streams
Of all my fear letting out screams.
I can no longer control it,  so it seems.

Constant fears,
Falling tears.
And so the darkness cheers.
I'm done with fighting after all these years.

Painful leech,
Satanic speech.
The voices screech
As the preacher began to preach.

All that's good,
And all that should.
Hiden behind a cross of wood.
To reach it, I never could.

They're pulling me back,
And that's a fact.
Hiding behind this hapiness act.
Pinning me down like paper behind a tac.

I'll never be free,
As you can see.
Drowning, I'll always be.
I'll never know why they ever chose me.

So, say "goodbye,"
And don't you cry,
For when I die,
I can finally fly.

Just keep that smile on your face,
Don't ever let it erase,
Just incase.
For when I'm gone, they'll need someone new to chase.

I've been contemplating about this life
Humanity and suffering
What we do
Why we do what we do
The rarest occasions that offer us peace
The happiness
The harmony
What gets us by
What breaks us

We live on a scope of dictated reality
Your life lightly making sense
Or does it
The struggles of getting by yourself
Pulling pushing and clinging
But clinging to what
Believing in what

Hapiness
What is happiness
Is happiness a matter of choice
Does that mean that we
Chose a scorching brutal life
In place of happiness
Was suffering forced on us

Beauty pageant
Whatever names we deem fit
Or intricately constructed
to award our highly dopamined life
Lies that  cushion us
A spongy dream that never ceased to amaze me
Or us

There's only an us if your willing to think
shun the ignorance
that strungles you
If that's even a probability
But i cannot blame us
On a reality that is shoved on us
A choice never made
But imposed

Her innocent smile is as bright as can be.
Which woefully,unwittingly fell into i diavolis sight.                            
She was truly the  fairest you could ever see.
No wonder she was taken to a world beneath all light.

She ate his fruit that was so sweet.
Then to find out she could not leave.
Disappointment down from her head to her feet.
With all the chills running down from her sleeve.

Dearest young maiden I feel your grief.
And every tear to be sulked like no other.
Thy art to return for thy has strong belief.
The daring buds of May then shall bloom,for happiness then
shall fill your mother.
  
For half the year air is cold followed  by the winters snow.
When shes back the flowers will grow by the hapiness of the summers glow.

Everytime I think about,
  what My Gods done for me;
The more I give my life to Him,
  more mercy I can see!

It blows my mind to think how long,
  I ran the other way;
Thank God, My Shepherd found this sheep,
  This one that went astray!

He called my name, then brought me in,
  from sinful life I lived;
He talked to me and paved the way,
  My sins to ALL forgive!

Now each new step I take in life,
  My Lord now close beside;
He walks with me each night and day;
  He matches every stride!

Such joy and grace I've came to know,
  since God came in my soul;
Such hapiness and peace I have,
  Since giving Him control!

When now in life the hard times come,
  His arms are open wide;
He gives me shelter in those arms,
  A loving place to hide!

Now looking toward my Heavenly home,
  since death has lost it's sting;
I'm sheltered now from all life's storms,
  Beneath My Saviour's Wing!!

We are on this limb together.
Hold onto me and I will never let you fall,
we can sit and sing together,
if love surging between us is not enough
then we were doomed from the start.
It can happen in the flicker of a hummingbird's wing.
We keep complaining about the stage,
but it is the players that run the show.
We will never quit wondering what might have been,
but the sun shines just as bright now, as it did in the past,
only now it can shine twice as bright, in our future
together.


-I want you to sing, and listen, as the secrets of sustained satisfaction, surge from our mouths
into each others ears.
I want to swallow your brains.
I want to laugh and level a building.
I want to pull you towards me,
I do not want to stop, do not want me to stop, I do not want you to stop.

What returns we will recieve,
if we invest our intellect in concert.

I shall always remember why I stayed.
Crawled through every one of these ditches
just to climb back up and find you there,
together we weaved safety from the meteor shower!

Why would any one want to stop?
Stay here.
I will tell you what I know, you know you want to know, tell me what you know.

No one shall prevent you from loving me.
Let us beat reality into submission, until it turns into our dreams,
Why turn back the clocks, when all of the elements of our hapiness exist still.
Let'***** play, and stop skipping back and forth,
we are the players, it is our stage!

The very moment I saw you, I instantly knew
That girl you're special, and that's so true
It's as if you were made for me
And I think you're my destiny

Your eyes, your lips, and your beautiful body
Is what a girl should ever be
You are so natural yet so odd
As if you were sent to me by God

The coincidences we met were astounding
And I cannot imagine this thing I'm feeling
Seems that all things about you were right
That's why I'm singing this song tonight

I really don't believe in destiny or happy ending
But when I met you, I can't imagine this feeling
It seems that all things went right
You've ended my fears and brought me light

The only moment you made me cry
Is the time when you said goodbye
But then, I did not lose hope
And with that, I learned to cope

Loving you is not that easy
And I don't understand what you feel for me
And with that I let my feelings flow
And the love that doesn't seem to go

You are my best friend and my twin
You are the hapiness I could ever been
I am yours and you are mine
We go along together just fine

You are the sweetest most delicious fruit
That's what you are, my dearest Nwute
I just can't get you off my mind
'Coz a girl like you is impossible to find

The stranger has returned
The one I despise.
I can see his shadow
Behind her green eyes.

I thought he was gone
Not seen him for years
But look here he is
Confirming my fears.

This uninvited guest
Who brings only sadness
I just want to hold her
Protect her from this madness.

He's doing his best
To pull her apart
It's sapping her strength
And breaking my heart

I see his presence
Inside her head
He tells her there's no point
In getting out of bed

He taunts her at night
As she lies awake
The pills aren't working
The cycle they can't break

He takes her emotions
To love, to be kind
He's trying to change her
To poison her mind.

She looks at me angry
Says I don't understand
As she pulls away
When I try to hold her hand

How are you doing?
I hear everyone ask
I'm good she replies
From behind her mask

They all think she's fine
That she's doing OK
But I know different
He's making her that way

I know I can't fix her
I can't make It right
So i will just love her
And pull her in tight.

She needs me to be patient
She needs me to be strong
She needs understanding
For however long.

So i tell myself this
Whenever I can
That the tears I am crying
Make me no less a man

It's threatening to consume me
The pain no one sees
Watching her struggle
With this wicked disease

I know that she needs me
To travel this road
To support and to help her
To lighten her load

And we need her also
The children and me
How important she is
I wish she could see

This kind and loving Woman
With so much to give
He's pulling at her soul
Her reason to live

But this woman is strong
She won't let him stay
Our love for each other
Will chase him away

Each time he comes
He stays a little longer
Though when he leaves
Our bond it grows stronger

Her hapiness will return
And her zest for life
This wonderful mother
My beautiful wife

Our lives will be joyful
And happy once more
With our 2 crazy children
Our family of four.

My fainting heart,
Where is thy glee?
My shivery heart,
Where is thy solace?.
Is it love,
That thou must find,
or this queer abyss of solitude,
That thou must flee?.
Either way,
Thy hapiness lie,
On the juncture,
Between Love, Solitude and Anonymity

Happiness,always reaching but barely touching
Like a  young child on tip-toes reaching to a cabinet but just touching the tip of the  mug
counting seconds till the collide of heels back to ground, defeat
Like trial and error, happiness was lurking and begging for my grasp
Searching for a grasp
I was told to find my center
But like watching a  constant swinging pendulum I could not stop
never able to stop, discover,and explore  the center
I was told happiness is not easy, not for your kind
Kind compassionate loving, why was being happy so unfulfilling
Unfulfilling, Like holding sand in your hands but it slides through those palms
Palms left empty
Emptiness, like watching  an hour glass of sand
sand finds the bottom and you see, feel, and understand half-full
Full,full, full
I found you and I found  full
fulfillment of a new kind: kind compassionate loving
Hapiness not reaching or  barely touching but grasping
Like a young child on tip-toes reaching in a cabinet for a mug and that grasp and pull
the feeling when heels kiss the wood floor; sign of relief
Like holding piles of sand and each grain is sliding through  palms
Palms no longer left  open and empty
My palms meets yours when the sand feels lost and gone  
like an hour glass perfectly timed
And placed horizontal
We create balance
Like watching a pendulum  stopped from the sway
Finding the center
Still, calm, peaceful

I want someone to notice how far ive drifted how lost i am how tired how dead. I want someone to tell me how the song in my voice once sounded so joyful; feel the drag in my feet, the shake in my hands. No, i dont  want this cluttered mind and I dont want this used body and I shouldnt want to drown in this silence but I dont want to disrupt the hapiness of those around me with a sadness I dont feel entitled to. Pretty white girl and she dont wanna live? More like crazy attention seeking *****. Dont wonder why I isolate. Reason behind sadness is akin to reason behind actions and when all we can do is wrong dont underestimate a cry.

In the lands yonder
Beyond the thrones of Europe
and the bustle of the West

There is a land
It is quiet and peaceful
The sun shines everyday
The people are black

In the lands yonder
Beyond the industrial buzz and dense smoke
There are a peaceful people in a land

Its rivers traverse the lands
From one end to the other
Its waterfalls are wondrous
Its caves adventurous

There is the land
Whose people dont worry
Their simplicity is baffling
They never hurry

There is the land
Whose people sit on gold mines and diamonds unexploited
There is more to life for these people

From days of old
They understood the balance of nature
Before Carl's nomenclature

In the lands yonder
Snow caps mountain tops
Elephants and Buffalloes run the Savannahs
Wildebeests migrate in wonder
In the lands yonder

The birds sing in hapiness
The lions roar in jungles
The lands are rich
The peoples cultures are rich too

They were once thought dunders
Plans were made to invade and plunder
Those were the worst blunders

They fought for equality
They fought for their rights
Adowa 1896
Apartheid 1994
MauMau 1954, and more
They died for their land

This is the land of peace
This is the land of wealth
And nature's bounty
This is Africa

The drunken dance of our war torn hearts are just the echo of a better time in my shattered mind....
The laughter of the peak of hapiness is just a cruel mask to temporary solitude...
Bring me back to my home or at least the castle in memories and stay safe in my arrogant tower...
Let your pedastal stand in hoarded surroundings so my clutter looks up to something...
Ill pull myself together and break the spell of shattered dreams only to make the moment seem beautiful....
But dont look back or the five oclock shadow of a broken man will engulf the joy i see in your eyes....
I disappear into the nothingness created by my wisdom to let her be free....
And as i watch her leave she takes the last breath of pure air in my vaccuum of heartache...

Your smile was so bright
Your laugh sparked a room
Always bringing such delight

But it was just a well performed act
Only a staging to conceal
The smiles were a hoax, a fraud in fact

Everyone in the audience oblivious
To the reality of his suffering
Blinded by the act, we never were suspicious

You never revealed your sadness
Always bright eyed and cheery
It seemed as if you were built from hapiness

Today i am still not sure
What the reason it was
To avert your stay on this earth

To force yourself to leave
If I had known before your departure
To have you stay I would infinitely plead

But you left with no warning
Abandoning multitudes of people
We soon found ourselves mourning

Over the death of our sunshine
The loss of an inspiring boy
Who had brought so much light to my life

my juvenile being,
your calming presence
not to be attached to you the whole time,
worry not, ...
as I'm perfectly fine in finding my own hapiness
...
but when we're together
you balance me out...
you're the ground under my seesaw
you bounce me back,
yet you'll always catch me when I fall

no words can seem to express my gratitude...
but if you will,...
please do take these sentiments...
if you may,...
just to acknowledge them,
as please don't resent them...
as i don't need any reprocications
as what we are now is all I need

The slightest light i see in the night when
the sun goes to rest.
The morning star that truimphs over
my daily worries
A mirror of positive reflection
that says to me all is well even when
am terribly troubled

Your the bridge to my hapiness even
where is no river to cross
Your the flight that flies all
the pain away though you have
got no wings
Like two ants can't fail to pull a grasshopper.
The wormth i feel in the middle of winter
The thinnest prison hole set for my rescue
and freedom
The last bullet to set captives free and
restore the dead to life
An Angel of lightful moments
A gallop of Oxygen to my injuries and an
eraser of the past
Last turn for a complete 360 in my life
A needle that brings my broken pieces
together
The path to the road of success
Chosen umbrella to shelter me
I live like a mouse in gold
Can not eat or sell it
Only to construct a home to raise hopes