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 May 2014 Vivian Proctor
Steff
She's so full of rage
Boiling at the surface
Ready to explode
You, yes you.
Typing out your despair.
Trying to feel less mental.
I've definitely been there.

You're in pain.
You are actually giving birth.
To another stronger you
A you with more self worth.

It will rip.
But I must reassure you
The emptiness gets refilled
Soon will come your debut

So, you, yes you
Keep typing your despair
I hope you feel less mental
Knowing that you will repair.
A message to the injured. You will recover and emerge like a butterfly.
 May 2014 Vivian Proctor
Caitie
She pulls down her long sleeves
To hide all the memories scars leave
She says, "Maybe making me bleed
Will be the answer that could wash the slate clean"
I'm not that girl who always fits in,
the girl who always seems to belong.

I'm not that girl who people look up too,
the girl that everyone loves.                

I'm not that girl who is pretty,
the girl who got all the luck.

I'm not that girl who boys want to date,
The girl with so much charm.

I'm not that girl and I never will be...
I'm just some girl that wants to be THAT girl
pale computer light reflecting off your skin.
shining brightest off the whites of your eyes.
you don’t look at me until I say your name.
I wish you looked me in the eye more.
at college my friends seem surprised when
I say I have a brother

I love you Lucas. I love you so much.

when I got home today you said:
“I’m watching that TV show you recommended,
it’s really good!
how’s college?
how long are you staying?
how was that concert?”
after I talked to you for a while,
I took a shower.
I curled up and cried with my
mouth opened up so wide I could of been
screaming. I made no sounds.
I didn’t want you to hear.
it was the first time you’ve ever asked me
more questions than I’ve asked you.
 May 2014 Vivian Proctor
Isaac
I'm sorry I ever told you I loved you.

Not because it is not the truth.

But because I'm only saying what we both know is true.

The first night I said it was late on the phone.

I was scared for what you would put yourself through.

I said it to you tears audible in my tone.

Three words that mean so much, yet never enough.

I gave myself completely to you

My cards turned outwards for you to call my bluff

You only once returned those words towards me.

But now you deny that,

Water from my eyes for all to see.

I wish you never said those words "I love you"

I could see it in your eyes, each one a galaxy.

Some Words are more overrated than the color blue

I said it once,  from there now i overused

Conversing now lazy because "I love you"

No more amoret or hazel, three words now I abused

Because I said those words this is difficult.

I became who I swore not to be.

In modesty never now alone's the result.
I
I knew a girl who always looked on the bright side no matter what, always saw the glass half full.

She lived fearlessly, only afraid of dying is what she would say.

The girl became sad, she didnt talk to anyone anymore, she started thinking negatively, like the glass was half empty.

She is scared of many things now, but dying is not one.

She cannot see the glass half empty of half full, for her shaky hands have dropped the glass.

As the liquid floods her feet, she comes to the realization that this liquid was not water but blood, hers. She is no longer afraid, and she knows she is already dead.
 May 2014 Vivian Proctor
bree
why i stopped cutting
why i stopped being suicidal
why i stopped caring about what people said to me
why i stopped faking smiles
why i felt safe
he made me strong, he loved me, he cared.
but i was wrong, and now he is gone.
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