Anxiety and excitement are one of the same
Research for an answer to analyse traits
For the loss of another can be someone's gain
A vicious cycle with which to attain
Stressed from such pressures
Soften your edges to lighten your weight
All in a state but we all hesitate
Widen perspective and encompass ourselves
When life skills aren't taught
Are we really at fault or who is to blame
Personal perception distinguishes choice
Critical thought strengthens one's voice
A softer approach is often dismayed
Where are your heroes when you reach of an age
Admiration compels to find your own way

when I found love,
it was nighttime.

I remember hoping that
maybe he couldn't see
what I looked like
in the darkness.
we laugh at that now.

it was a real fear then,
but now I realize how
irrational it was.

how does that make any sense?
someone who loves you
will see you eventually.
if they wouldn't want to see you,
then how can you call that love
in the first place?

you shouldn't need to
dress up and go on dates.
true love is found
wearing sweatpants
and a baggy shirt,
with no makeup on.

you shouldn't need to
go looking for love.

the truth is that
you will be alone
for a while, maybe even
for a long time.

and the truth is
that loneliness will hurt
and it will not be easy.

but if you go looking
for love before you are
meant to come across it,
you will only find it
in the wrong places.

when you do find love,
it won't be perfect.
it will be messy sometimes
and awkward and hard,
but don't throw it away.

it's that messiness and
that imperfection and
those awkward moments.

those are love.

love is being yourself
with someone who loves you
for being yourself,

and who doesn't
just want to love you.

they want you to love yourself
the same way that they love you.

they want you to see yourself
through their eyes,
so that you can finally know
how truly amazing you are.

The grains of sand stuck
to the sweat in between my
toes are each as big and
burning as any star stuck
into the spilt Black—
each mass a Giant searing
through skin, bubbling towards
the hollow flues of bone,
kindling a greater burn that
shines out my eyes, reflecting
my own Ancient Chaos back
at those watchful fires
in the sky;
call it an introduction,
a nod in acknowledgement
of our meetings to come.

coming up
clouds full
of dawn