An evil man who said
He loved peace and
In his dark shadows he'd
Whisper and he'd hide
With a gun by his side and
He'd plot to **** everyone in Yemen
And then he'd laugh as he
Watched people run and hide.

i find the crossroads
i have a tendency to
walk into
during times like these

it’s empty here
except for the invading gusts
of mannerless winds
that don’t say “excuse me”
or “please”
as they pass me

i await for a vehicle
my preference would be
an expensive one
like a really nice rolce royce
to make this quick
painless but pricey

i can feel weight on my chest
about such a lightness in my life
i have people
but there’s this recurring
lack of soul
that makes me feel
ancient and aimless
like lost history
that everyone is familiar with
but no one truly knows
anything of

i feel like the homeless men
i pass by on 137th street
they go by unseen
might as well be six feet deep
in a cemetery

i observe my helpless will
crave for the ability to slow
my mothers inevitable aging
as it shuffles through files
and memory after memory
in search of some hidden
ancient
wisdom to stop time

my dwindling creations
collect dust
in a digital shelf
while i deal with the rust
i’ve allowed to form
in my bank accounts
credit score
and stomach

there’s so much maintenance
towards the inflammation
in my life
that there’s no more antibodies
for anything else
so much struggle to hold
this boulder up over
my neck
which makes me strong
but this constant sweat
leave no more water
for tears

i don’t crave opportunity
i don’t need a friend
i love my lover and my mother
but they ain’t meets to an end
of the never ending fear
of simply not being enough

i crave release from my own responsibilities
i find this tug of war between
sacrificing the self
to overcome it
in order for the greater goods to be
fulfilled
as well as this death of my ego
while
making sure my soul
is still grounded
to be *******
exhausting

i crave a pasture

allowing me to float over the singular blades of grass
allowing me to become
weightless
in the face of all this
pressure

i remember being a boy
and in my island the hills
and mountains and beachfronts
have their own voices

i remember distinctly climbing highly
or swimming far out
or exploration between the tree lines
to be a form of soothing
not therapy
but rather warm rejuvenation

where i wouldn’t think about
my finances and debts
or my relationships and ties to
characters i love
the ones i tolerate
and the ones i’m trying to love
i wouldn’t think about
stability or a consistent routine and schedule

i’m all grown up now
and my creativity compared to
the vast
and endless universes
i’d hide in
as a boy
are a forest fire
compared to my candle
at twenty three years old

i lay here silent
in the middle of this crossroads
waiting for that kid
to come hold my hand and teach me something
because he had the right answers
or at least better answers
he cared about the right things
he genuinely saw
the divinity
in all
and now i’m old enough
to struggle finding the silver lining
in anything

i remember being so creative
that life was almost missing suffering

where the lack of it wasn’t even anywhere near my awareness
and i wasn’t anywhere near as brave
or strong
or wise

it’s almost like the more i know
the older i get
the more i go through
and the more bills i pay
the less of a human being
i become

where the
****
is this **** car
already

hurry up

-melancholicreator

𝗠: Be a man who is moral in his actions, meaningful in his words, and mindful in his decisions.
𝗔:  Be a man who is admirable in character, authentic in his self, and ambitious in his dreams.
𝗡:  Be a man who is noble in heart, nurturing in spirit, and never afraid to do what’s right.

That is what it truly means to be a 𝗠𝗔𝗡.


Be a man who saves his gaze for the one written in destiny
Be a man whose wife finds no other gaze in his eyes
Be a man whose wife sees only love , loyalty not longing  
Be a man whose eyes hold respect not desire
Be a man who honours every woman's dignity
Be a man who lifts the weight of his father's worries
Be a man who brings a smile to his mother's face
Be a man who stands as the strongest pillar for her sister
Be a man who  becomes a hero to his daughter
Be a man who lives as a role model for his son


Be a man who  uses his strength to protect , not to harm
Be a man who raises his standards , not his hands
Be a man whose actions speak louder ,not his voice
Be a human who breaks unjust rules , not  her heart
Be a man who builds up woman , not break her
Be a man who respects her choice , not impose his


Be a man who is shelter
Be a man who is a protector
Be a man who is guider
Be a man who is comfort
Be a man who is peace
Be a man who is love


Be a man who loves himself
Be a man who values himself
Be a man who forgive himself
Be a man who  understands himself
Be a man who invents himself
Be a man who protect himself
Be a man who believes in himself
Be a man who motivate himself
Be a man who accept himself
Be a man who has pure soul
Be a man who has heart ,not stone
Be a real man.

SNAKE
cold blooded adapter smooth in its capture, venomous to those caught in its rapture
CATERPILLAR
ultimate evolver unique in every state, to cocoon and assimilate into a new creature at such a fast rate
OX
lifter of the heavy, for the weak there are plenty, paver of new roads that bring prosperity to many
RABBIT
soft to the touch we all wanna pet usually are to fast for anyone to get
PIG
plentiful is the swine for weak is their mind created for slaughter what a sad lifetime
IGUANA
all I can think is Mexican radio a snake with legs smoking **** in 80's videos
OSTRICH
a bird who cannot fly makes me wonder why such a big bird won't even try

~

DOMESTICATED
over time becoming content living in a situation not originally meant
OBEDIENT
submits to authority biding time as a follower till own goals become priority
GROWL*
slow rumble from the soul an intimidating stare with a glow, with a Grrr! everyone will know

faint divine sun dances
between trees and branches
falling upon my fig tree
open my rib, set my heart free.

~and all our fingers,
all our veins,
each are branches of a mission.
and with life we wrinkle,
with age we sacrifice fertile freedom. enlightment keeps us alive
like the nurturing water.
but immortality?
fig is the fruit of realization, as golden wisdom rays bless you, forever.
immortality is
in the wisdom of mysteries.~

fig is a wise man
sitting on a vast, ancient land.
his eyes seem to find something,
in the secrets mist held.

~and you search
all fountains,
all cups,
yet you found it in a lake.
and never,
never so immortal you were,
so thirsty for truth.
fig blessed you,
like the early morning sun rays.
your heart was never so exposed, never so ******,
never so touched...~

under her fig tree.