I am nothing
without a soul
just a hollow shell.

I am nothing
without my thoughts
just a fool on the line.

I have nothing
left to give
I am just running from myself.

I wish I had something
left to hold on to
feels like I'm drowning in the sand.

I feel nothing
running all alone
till I bleed myself dry.

I am nothing
without you
I wish you could've stayed
I don't know where you're gone.

I associate sadness with you
Drinking makes me sad
Drinking brings me back you
A hollow, bottomless, throbbing feeling
After a while it feels almost reassuring
It may not be nice, but it feels like home
Comfort in its familiarity
My place to mourn you
Deep inside my hollow heart

For a thousand reasons they've hated me
Waiting in the shadows, for a daily treat
Stuck in this hell hole, to be the predator
Never was the intention to hurt others
Even my sweetest words can harm them
Condolences on behalf of my mourning
In the middle of a terrible story, I stand
As the hero and the villain, a modern drama

Let me dry out under the sun rays
Falling, shattering leaves all over the ground
As their celebration begins in this beautiful evening
As death comes forth, I await a merciless judgment

I think about car crashes,
And the wind in the grass,
Summer was just hot enough,
For our small souls to bloom.
The path I traverse over and over,
I’m coming back to now,
My life appears to be re-walking,
Re-tracing.
My heart and your hair,
Did you mean all the things you said?
When you were drunk and I was keeping you upright,
Safe from the wind?
I love you in the ways that matter most,
I’m sorry I’m not very good at it.
I’m not confident, or perfect,
I’m not easy to love.
Should I be easy to love?
I ask that a lot,
I know I ask too many,
Questions.
And you don’t have the answers.
But why is this day,
Aching at the heart,
Flesh ripped from flesh,
I never really understood you,
Will you leave me at the altar?
Am I the stars above?
Sometimes I feel like I am nothing.
Shallow
-under the night sky of influence.
Would you argue?
Would you complain?
And is it worth it, our lengthy refrain?
I keep it at a distance.
But I think I know.
At least the stars above and earth below continue to hold me,
Keep me still.
Until overturned cars,
And the colour blue,
Stop making headaches twist and rot behind my eyes.

I'm into the dark bloom
I cried for the doom by an obscene colostomy
do not dare to ask whose

I just shall not answer in my mask of crystal
I sniff my pain
I shout my regret
but, could I give this guilt a culprit or a name anyway?

The lines of fear start to turn out my brain
even if it is going to devour me
let me be mysterious
even if you know what the plot is
Is the light a fool?
Or just am I being the silly mime?
I disintegrate on the void of their heart
My head creates non-existent memories before my disease  
but at the edge of the lame time
who I am to blame?
Just lose you in the deepest ditch
where the ache is not drilling my walls
just the silence of my biggest penumbra counting my clock’s sand.

i'd cry

but
i'd have to have
tears to give

i'd laugh

but
i'd have to have
air to spend

i'd bleed

but
i'd have to have
blood in my veins

i'd love

but
i'd have to have
a heart in my chest

If I plunge a knife in my heart
And wake up again
Will I see a new life?
Will I see a new me?
Oh no, but I'm very empty inside
The knife would just
Find its way out free