I think my addictions are addicted to me. It's a mutual symbiotic parasitism. I've taken up drinking, hoping that will push them away. But it's like lighting a fire and trying to put it out with gasoline.
And God I'm soaked.
I want to cut it out. Gunpowder is better than gasoline, right?
Iced hands Drip, dripping with icicles Light a fire Dip, dipping them in gasoline Stick a hand in, one at a time, Into the fireplace Smile Scorched hands, are happy hands Crackling in time with the flickering flames The shadows cast, dance the tango around the room Skin melting off the bone Drip, dripping down my arms
I feel it all so deeply that it hangs from my neck like an unmarked tombstone I've tried to bury it in one too many drinks instead they quenched the embers sparking in my gut so I get drunk on gasoline hoping to match fire, with fire fumbling hands shoving matches down my throat swallowing them whole consuming that which burns so bright within me and even after I catch ablaze I still feel it all too deeply.