I'm just me...
An expectation by royal decree,
Why should you ask for so much,
Knowing I could never please you as such?

Set the bar high
So I know my place
When you were wanting to die
I was left as nothing but a disgrace

Set the bar low
So I know your trust
When you were wanting to go
I was left to nothing but rust

Set the bar fair
So I know of chance
When you were wanting to be happy my dear
I was left as a puppet to dance

Set the bar high
So I know how it feels
When you were wanting to break down and cry
I was left alone as my heart reels

Set the bar low
So I know where to fall
When you were wanting answers I didnt know
I was left with nothing at all

Set the bar fair
So I know you love me
When you were wanting everything to be square
*I was left patiently waiting to see

In sad songs and heartbroken poems
you always hear about the kids
who are told they won't make it.
That they will be nothing when they're old.
For once I want to hear something about the kids
who are told that they should be
and will be
everything.
Only to come to the realization
at 14,
that they can't do everything.
That sometimes,
you try, and you try, and you try,
but it's just not enough.
That sometimes,
you just can't do it.
Sometimes,
you're just not smart enough.
Sometimes,
you're just not quick enough.
Sometimes,
you just can't live up
to the expectations
that have been given to you
since you were born.

Can't even finish a sentence
without being stressed
with every little thing I write
with every little math problem I solve
Because for some reason I can't do it right.

Can't even finish a thought
without being consumed
with all the anxiety
with all the fear
because for some reason they expect me to do it right.

Can't even finish a task
without being engulfed
with a headache
with a stomach ache
because now I'm not feeling right.

Can't even finish this poem
without being overwhelmed
with every little math problem
with all the anxiety
with a headache
All because I want to do it right.

I try so hard to change myself,
Yet it isn’t enough for you.

You force me and push me,
Yet when I bleed, it’s too much for you.

I can’t do what you wish of me,
Yet that’s not satisfaction enough for you.

I want you to stop,
*Is that too much to ask of you?

If you havent earn't my respect.
Then you dont deserve my respect.

Why would YOU expect any otherwise?

I'm afraid that's just,
an unrealistic expectation,
to begin with.

Her smile turn to a frown,
The joy of her life turn sad.
She began to shatter,
Tears start to fall.
Their expectations were heavy,
Their words were sharp.
It was hard,
She had tried.


{ E.I }

Expectations were soaring

The invitation addressed:

Me and a Guest.

Expectations were tense.

The last suitcase labelled.

I shaved in my mirror.

Gave the shoes a black shine.

(Pulled back the flap,
Laid a grip on a bottle,
Gave it full throttle)

Expectations were high.

I saw the mailman

Wasn't far from my drive;

Still facing the northwind

The mailman

Walked by.

Expectations can lie.