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Diana Morales Dec 2019
Face is going numb
That’s how I know I’m in the right place
For all the wrong reasons
Of course
This isn’t normal
In fact this is unusual
I speak firmly
Trying to express that I know what I want
But actually I’m lost
And need direction
Hoping to find another world
Full of passion and purpose
The longer I linger
The more my responsibilities escape my grasp
But sometimes that’s okay
It normal to want to get away
Empire Dec 2019
I’m hardly tired
But I just wanna sleep
Took the the pills so early...
In desperation
In the hope
That they’ll show me mercy
And lull me into slumber
To save me from myself
Grey Dec 2019
Let us run away
From the troubles of the world
To wonders elsewhere
Alek Mielnikow Dec 2019
The study of destruction
Reveals a hidden chart
Of unbridled desires
And ***** rotten hearts
Was I your little plaything?
Was I your little toy?
Did you just take advantage
Of my playing coy?

The impulse of the carnal
It was warming up my blood
The pinnacle of pleasure
Until I fell in love
Now I must escape this
And scrape away the dirt
Let go of all my craving
To keep from getting hurt

-
by Aleksander Mielnikow
(Alek the Poet)
Not done intentionally, but this poem seems to go with my other poem, "Lighter". A continuation... or maybe the opposite perspective? What do you think?
Jay M Dec 2019
I was supposed to be
6 months sober
But ***** that
Just another sip
Burn my mouth
Burn my throat
Make me feel okay
Just for a little while

A poison
So bitter
Making me feel
So sweet

Allowing for a temporary escape
From all of my pain
Just for a little while
Letting me smile
Though it wasn't true
It felt true
The poison making me
Believe
I was happy
Just for
A little while

Good emotions
Not a care in the world
Just swaying
Singing a song
Laughing at nothing
Everything funny
For no reason at all

I let go
For a little while
Let myself be tempted
Grab it
Be poisoned
Intoxicated

But
I'm not supposed to be

I'm supposed to be
Okay
Without
The **** poison
But it's hard
So **** hard
To be okay
When hell
Is in your head
Devouring your skull
But the demons never feeling full

I said ***** it
But the ***** is in my head
Giving me a headache
Pulsing
Thinking
Then regretting
Guilt
For what I've done
The promise I broke
Leaving behind what I was supposed to be;
Sober.

- Jay M
December 3rd, 2019
Gotta sober up.
N Dec 2019
The chained ankles
are heavy and aching
with ****** bruises

The chained ankles
would rather break free
sarah kayy Nov 2019
I just need to write
I just need to leak
I won't say what's on my mind
I'll have the words search and find
Since when was opening up a crime
Only in this day and time
I want to speak
My tongue is locked
My eyes open wide
To flood things out
Stupid .
In a time where no one reads
No one reads the eyes
No one reads people
No one looks enough to care
If one doesnt listen , would one look?
Oh how foolish!
Teach my words to find contentment
Teach my thoughts to rest
An  escape does not exist
Only in unseen space
Ol Nov 2019
I have a taste for cowardice men.

Men who tell me how beautiful I am,
How pretty,
How nice my hair is,
Or how great my body looks,
Under the covers,
Especially with them on top.

Men who cup my hands
And look me deep in the eye
peering into my soul,
to “cherish me”
“Remember me”
“Learn the curves of my face”.

But I know these cowardice men-
they will forget me.
As soon as their lust is lost.
As soon as their **** has learnt me..
All too well.
As soon as she rears her head.

I know these cowardice men
Will hold me, in the night
Almost pushing me back together
After the last,
Who left me.

But these cowardice men forget,
I can’t love me,
Not anymore.
Because loving me makes me think,
Of happiness and who I could be.

And I forget,
For a little while,
I only fall for cowardice men,
Who never say bye when they leave.
Never blink in my direction,
They just leave the door wide open.

Wide open for the next.
Each boy I have loved, I looked into their eyes and begged them to never cheat. Each said they wouldn’t. They all lied. Then they all lied about cheating.
Ol Nov 2019
I give myself up to fill you,
but you’re just a void.
You take all you want,
but cannot be destroyed.
You harbour all my energy,
fill my head with insanity,
...“as if”
I could be your fantasy.

My heart beats frantically,
As I cannot live with this agony.
You choked me down,
to have me around.
Yet I paid with my sanity?

How dare you come back to me,
begging for sweet *****,
just to taste what we could be.

You don’t deserve anybody,
let alone my ******* body,
so go away and leave my heart be.
Ol Nov 2019
I do not like to be touched.

I loathe to be felt, like a velvet jacket in a shop.
I cannot stand being man handled, touching my waist to move past me.

But to taste your finger tips against my lips, and your hand against my heart. Was comfort like no other.

To watch your ****** expressions, reacting to television stimulation. As I felt your soft curls in my hand.

I felt full. Whole almost in those moments.

Chasing highs of you.

Chasing away my lows. A race against time between us.

Then falling out of touch became a game.

And now I crave to feel. Anything. Anyone feel me.
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