Hidden from the world, their expectations too high
I will never reach them, even if I try.

So I change myself; My face, my hair,
Everything that makes me ME, no one will care.

Soon enough, I'm not the same as I used to be
No longer that little girl that everyone loved to see.

I have become a fake person with fake aspects
So afraid of their expectations of having to be perfect.

I have lost the only people that cared about the real me
Now I'm a nail, holding up their reputations like the tool they want me to be.

I am defenseless and the only thing I can do is be quiet
This is what I wanted, right? The new look, personality and diet.

I wanted to reach their expectations and still I fail to do that
I changed myself for them but still they walk all over me like a mat.

I guess their expectations were too high, I couldn't go that far
Now I have to live with them ******* me dry of myself like the leeches they are.

I'm on a strict diet of
red wine and smoke
as I train for a marathon
of loneliness, self-discovery, and
moving on.

Letting you go was crushing,
and I still fight the
urge at least once a day
to unblock your number
just so I can say hello.

Nearly everything takes me back to you,
whether it's a sunset I know you'd cherish
or a poem I know you'd
want to analyze with me.
You live in the tree's green leaves
and in the smiles of strangers.
I feel you next to me as I
toss and turn in my bed,
and I smell you in the candles
that are supposed to soothe me.

It seems cruel that you can't be around,
and my heart often
threatens my head for *******
a good thing up.
But the good I had with you
was bad for me,
and I know I need to let myself
be broken so that I can
one day be full again.

I'm on a strict diet of
red wine and smoke
as I replace the love I have for you
with love I'm finding of and
for myself.

I'm on the train, it's six o'clock
With a hunger bomb, tick tock, tick tock
Which at any moment, will explode
My weight loss goals start to implode
Why not have a small baguette
Who needs a diet, just forget
No one knows, it's not a sin
Just buy that chocolate, stuff it in
How dangerous can a latte be
With that biscuit pack that comes for free
Or maybe just a little wine
Along with nuts, go on it's fine
Determined, I shut out the voice
Stay in charge, I have a choice
I sip some water, shun a snack
And pat myself upon the back

Must I,
Like some fitness freak,
Do 10 000 crunches
To see my feet?
Or,
Rely on
Water's erosive powers
To expose my toes
With 10 000 showers.

I don't know since when.
This diet has began
and gone extreme.
There was once
a reasonable aim.
But a new one comes up
whenever the old was
claimed.  
Crosses over the weekdays.
Tell me how far I have gone.
But the crosses goes on,
They linger far too long.  

I was counting on my calories.
Eating portions from my lunchbox.
No more than
a quarter
I couldn't stop.
I'm sorry.
But I'm not.

Led by starvation
my ultimate downfall.
I was saving all the calories.
For a binge at a time.
Keeping in my desires.
Till it's time to dine.
No my throat is on fire.
It's getting tire and tire.
So I kept eating and
release as
I violently *****.

This is all too
disgusting.
dreadful.
disgusted am I.
Nothing have I eaten for breakfast,
lunch, tea and dinner.
Spooning out from my
kiwifruit.
No one could save me.
From my one and only solitude.

The miracle weight loss pill ...
does help you lose weight, but keep it off what a joke
it doesn't change whats in your head
it doesn't give you the rush you need
when you're down

The miracle diet ...
does work for a while of course you lose weight
feels good you're eating healthy food
feels good that others notice and compliment you
then you plateau

The exercise machine ...
promises the world you too can be a hot model
you can do it just 3 minutes a day
you will transform into **** in weeks
then you stop

It takes much more than a few dollars
To turn your world inside out
To change the way you think
To change your lifestyle
Food is just food
Think about it like that
Try cutting out added sugar
Replace the bad takeaway with a good one
Do something small everyday
Remove all the effort
Its working on me
Day by day
I'm starting to fade away
Awesome