You don't have to love me anymore
But I'll always love you
You'll always have someone there
A wide open pair of sliced-up arms

I used to dream of you laying on my chest
Now all that lays there is razor marks
I almost don't mind if they scar;
They can represent my pain like a crest

I'll never be able to hear of your country
Not even see the southern cross
Without remembering your eyes
I'm so broken, I can't find it in me to cut ties

And so as you move on with life
I hope you know I still wish you the best
And I know you don't believe me, but I'll be here
Dragging the next blade across my chest

I know you'll be happy
And one day, I pray I can be too
But until then
Australia still makes me think of you

What a beautiful surprising life
Is so precious but it cuts you like a knife
A painful sunset shakes thoughts awake
Every evening from the fantasies we make
A bright new sunrise in the early haze
Midafternoon hot like a blaze
Commanding time
Providing light
She rules day
He rules night
The moon cloaked in shades of black
The sun robed in white and blue
Perfect balance to steady the universe
Allowing meaning to all we do
King and Queen of humble Earth
Governing vast sky
Without reciprocation
No complaining
No asking why
How come I am so ungrateful?
Why can't I realize I am blessed?
I should be thanking trees for the oxygen supplied
Instead cursing the air inflating my chest
I need to open my eyes all the way
Look a little harder around
Because on days with no sunshine to be found
Just under clouds that star is still there
Reliably shining away from man's stare
It is true that every second in this world is a gift
Remember next time you feel low and seek a lift
Cherish miracles hidden
Great and small
Gaze towards the heavens when bowed by a fall
Even if you can't see its glow or feel its gentle burn
The sun is there in our stormiest hours
Eventually it's presence will return

whenever their words are sandpaper
that aggressively rubs her heart
and forms stinging cuts,
her hands always reach for
her soft, fluffy, warm blanket.
as it envelops her in its warmth,
her heart heals the cuts
and becomes soft again.

I'm back into this beautifully torturous environment  

That I so un-proudly call “home”

Chained, restricted, duct tape shut

I’ve felt it all before

#childhood

The scars, the bruises, and the cuts

They were starting to heal, slowly but surely

But I’m starting to feel the cuts reopen

The bruises coming once again

And the scars shining brighter than before, taunting me with the reminder

That there is truly no place like home

skin left sore and damage.
My purple flesh leaves marks that signify hate within others.
Pain left from fathers and mothers, sister and brothers, friends or foe.
I  believe the skeletons I hide, have more guts than I do.
Being pushed around and abused by those close to me without fighting back.
But I know I would rather take a thousand cuts before giving one.
I may seem so well put together from the outside, but I know on the inside I have been torn apart.

Just an inch
without a flinch
of a river flowing red.

But then I said,

Just another inch
without a wince
of silver staining red.

I see you
You’re the girl who’s too put together
For what her heart feels
For what her arms scream
You wear band aid sleeves
Your lips spill out lies
But I can see past
Band aid blinds

It’s your little secret
That kills you inside
No one knows how deep those cuts go
Deeper than your skin

You must be in agony
There’s a monster clawing at your heart
And no one else seems to care
You feel you’re bleeding out
In front of them all
And no one says a word

You must be so frustrated
Seeing your own hands cut your skin
When no one around you needs
To destroy their body
Just to get through the day

You wish you could rip off the band aids
And let them drink in your brokenness
But you never do

My friend, I want to tell you
Everything will be okay
But you’re the only one
Who can make that promise
All I can do is tell you
I see your cuts
Because I had them too

And I thought it would never get better
But I was wrong

I hope more than anything
That someday your cuts will
Turn white just like mine
And you’ll wear short sleeves
And not be ashamed
And that one day you’ll see past someone’s
Band aid blinds
And tell them your story
Of how you thought your pain would last forever
But in the end
It didn’t

Trigger warning: Cutting, self harm


Not technology
Not an accessory
Not a tool
Not a clock
Not a device
Not jewelry

My watch is a mask
A disguise, a cover
For the darkness I hide

As long as it’s there
As long as it stays put
They’ll never know
That underneath
There are marks which prove
Irrefutably
I’m living a lie
I’m not alright

But I can keep it quiet
Hiding my wounds
Beneath my watch band