Everything he was,
everything he did-
was a constant effort
to be true to the image
he had of himself.

He reminds me of struggle
to be someone else
while believing that he is
struggling to be himself.

Who are you today?

I am
hurt by the fact
you can deceive and love so perfectly
at the same
time
Frightened
by your sublime.

Who are you today?

I know not
who you are any longer.
I do not know which person
I would be talking to
or living with.

Get back to the spirited,
kind and trustworthy constant
that you
once were
before you strayed off
Before your dis-ease
You have a Constant
Like a star,
a knowing
Unwavering
        Please find him
And hold on
as if your life
Depended
on it.

If the world was nicer
I would've been happier.
    
     But I surely would've died sooner.

The world has never been nice
And it has never been kind

And I must thank it for that,
For being constant in my life.

I am dirt.
I am a constant in your life.
I am there to catch you when you fall.
I am there when you lay alone at night
struggling to feel something.
I am never fading
for I am dirt.

You are human.
Your body was not meant to touch stars.
You are meant to swallow fire
to burn cities to the ground.
You take me for granted because
You are human.

You are a human who found another human.
Another human who could do my job.
Another human who could do more.
Another human who stole you from me.
Yet you didn’t take them for granted.
Your human is a thief.

I thought I was dirt.
Now I am laying alone at night.
What am I feeling?
Dirt can’t feel, or can it?
I am not dirt.

I am human.

submerged

drowned by the thoughts
of you loving me back
murdered by the reality
of me being abhorrent