I'm a ******, I'm the oddball
My style defiles piles of pop culture ads
While I bounce off these rubber walls
With a hamster running in my head,
Until around two a.m. he goes to bed
Typing a tapestry of insanity
Pouring all the demons from my edeitic memory
Blaming the insecurities on my pedigree
Then destroy all the evil like a heroic entity.

I keep peace without a peacekeeper
I fight reapers hissing like creepers
In a secret lair, Kronk pull the le-ver,
Slashing male stereotypes, aren't I cleaver?
You wouldn't want to try to battle my wits
You'd ball your fists, I'd spit at you, sir
And let my vernacular blast your brains
This isn't a Robert Frost work, stay in your lane.

You'd take the path less traveled,
I'd pound the ground until the earth unraveled
Leaving nothing but the gravel to grovel
Like a duck without grapes you should waddle,
I drink coffee by the hoddle,
Never stuck in stop or stall, keep it rolling,
I'm a Katamari, oddball.

The soul
Is seen beneath a face of glass
With eyes looking up
As
Beads of water from clouded skies
Dispersed across the pane.

just tell me what to do,
confess to me your love,
or leave me here,
i promise this won’t be long.
just find out what to do,
tell me what to do,
what gave you the mobility to get over me,
to overcome the distance that once broke our connection apart?
how did you do it?
tell me, or I’m afraid,
I might have to jump off a building,
Cause’ you’re stuck in my brain again,
Yeah, I’m stuck in my brain again.
havoc and incessant quarrels,
bring tears to eyes and knives through hearts.
despite the mess you made with our love,
I’d go through it again if I were to know we would create the product of our love.
you’re the one i choose,
and most importantly,
the one i can never lose,
you’re stuck in my brain again,
yeah, stuck in my brain, again.
wish i could hear your voice,
it used to soothe me when i’d reminisce,
late at night, used to seek comfort in daydreaming,
in those daydreams, you used to confess to me your love through dry humor and long phone calls,
we would recycle the same thoughts to prolong conversations,
and pivot them, when the time grew too long,
all i get nowadays are the reminders that we were far too young to comprehend the concept of love;
we are no longer in love as we once were,
and you don’t feel the same anymore,
which brings me to face what i have avoided all of these years.
i no longer feel sane anymore,
so I lay wide awake,
To get my soul away,
I look for new ways around the thought of you,
I need a great escape or I might jump off a building.
is it wrong to hope that someday love will return to us?
to the one place in the world where it falls and belongs to us.
i’m afraid that if it doesn't,
time and fate will consume us slowly,
right before you declare to me the loss of us,
have you know that you’re the one i run to mid problems and emotions,
your name drives me crazy when i hear it,
still hard wired to the thoughts that make me run to you,
and your smile, don’t even get me started,
however, i acknowledge the deep sorrow and pain you feel for cutting off the supply chain of tangible thoughts that trace through my head and the oxygen that supports the barely moving body of mine,
in an alternate world,
you’re stuck in my brain, again,
yeah, stuck in my brain again.

fall from the lies

you've pinched yourself poor

fall from the lies

they are no nesting place

fall from the lies

thrive

from your dormancy

shudder off your sleep state

regain your currency

fall from your lies

and the famine of all this 'luxury'

there is this guy
that supposed to whisper
in my brain
"hey,pal,
you should definitely stop drinking"
but he's enjoying
watching me
take shots
after shots
until I whisper
in my heart
"hey, pal,
you should definitely stop thinking about her"
but he too
enjoys
watching me
take shots
after shots
after shots
until my brain shuts off for a while
and my heart beats barely
and I know in the morning
she'll be in both no matter what
with a freakin' hangover

You stupid, stupid heart.
You just had one job.
Pump blood that’s all.

Instead you had to mess it up.
Catch feelings, get carried away,
break and weep.

Brain asked me to warn you,
to hold your pace or else
to make you think of the last time
when you got stomped upon,
got shattered into pieces,
going after something that wasn’t
yours to keep.

To remember how much you cried
and almost died beating for someone
who wasn’t yours to hold onto.

You stupid, stupid heart.
Why would you turn yourself cold?
But most importantly when will you ever learn?

I look at you
everyday
either way,
I can’t feel the pleasure stay,
envious,
out of touch,
out of mindful bend and brush!
pull and push,
trim the bush,
hold back all your fears!
hold back all your fears!
I watch you
everyday,
either way
I’m not getting better!
tell your story
state your statement,
I still can’t feel the pleasure!
-hold back my fears-

echoes running thoroughly upon my head,
my my, these words i hear repeatedly said
lightning and thunder fumbling in my bed
a sight i see, the color red

the quiet resonance filling my ears
all that is left are cries and tears
sighed and breathed, no one hears
this halting life, in my mind, pierced

keep on screaming, they say
living always have a price to pay
so come what may
perhaps its too late to stay

24 begins with its cruel rule:
"No sustenance or quenching of thirst
until the sad/happy day passes."

Caring women with initials enter
Poking, prodding, asking the same questions,
While loved ones nervously watch.

Close friends, friends, and strangers
Phone and visit, offering their comforting words.
"We love you."  "We're praying for you."
"Make a pact with God."  "Chin up!"  "Happy Birthday!"

Their messages intermingle with disquieting thoughts
Of hopes and dreams left unfulfilled.
"Why me?"  "What now?"  "I knew it was too good to be true."
As hunger gnaws, and expectation is postponed.

A caring woman with initials enters one last time,
Poking, prodding, asking the same questions,
As the pushers of the bed arrive with their benign smiles.

Unwanted darkness returns,
As uncommon mortals work at their bizarre craft,
Opening the golden bowl,
Exposing its precious contents.

East and West Coast loved ones,
Separated by time and circumstance,
Carry on their prayerful vigil.

As 24 continues,
Surrounded by love,
Sustained by hope.