find my poems
in a hundred years
and analyze them
as though they are written
in a foreign language
from a foreign time
full of foreign ideas
and words

analyze the way i say
i'm sad

"the darkness outside
spills into my empty room
on a body
wracked with sorrow
but too proud to cry"

analyze the idea
that everything i write
means something else
and i am not just
too lazy for prose

interpret me needing to talk
as me creating allusions

say to my face that when i said

"i'm happy"

it was sarcastic irony that reflected
my inner turmoil

analyze my poem
that is free therapy
to mean something
i wrote just for you

it speaks to you because
my word choice
was simple
every day

it speaks to you because
my alliteration is
totally
on purpose

it speaks to you because
literary terms
speak to you
more than some words
that meant

"i'm sad"

analyze me
and look past my struggles
that don't fit your agenda

analyze me

i am poetry

my soul is poured out
in each of these lines
each letter is me

so analyze me
like one of your french girls

make me beautiful

make me something that is
not
desperate poetry

make me you

A child that grows up being bullied, even by teachers, family;
That becomes a tween who is told to keep his thoughts and emotions to himself, or go to a hospital;
That becomes a teenager that is told to let go of people and emotions from just recent past;
That becomes a late teen that is told he is responsible for everything that he is going through all in his own self, with no support for his human nature;
That becomes a young adult whom is consistently abandoned because of the pain, trauma and despair he is solely seeking compassion because of;

Becomes a man who appears to be a warrior like machine. Powerful in demenour face to face, with words that will shine light on societies hidden ignorance; also capable of trumping others complacency of injustice in perception, and ending their crusade of fallacy towards disregarding others simple human rights. This man can make a crowd shake with his truth, that has been experienced far from feeble. They can carry a lie for years and have it crushed like an egg when they speak it to him; a intuitive reverse psychologist; vividly fluent in ethical philosophy, cannot be deceived.

Even jigsaw placed a restraining order, and turned himself in to escape.

God may have given him the curse, so he could show the world it could become a blessing.

But the most solid thing that this man becomes, after all the damage leaves him permanently disturbed;
This man becomes sorry.

No one sees him cry.
No more tears for himself;
The world has caused him a functional dysfunction; his only way to stop sudden confusion, is to make a paradox in his head about the situation, and solve it.

His heart wears titanium armour. None the less, does not cry.
His mind is quite damadged,
and no one knows why.
Yet they demonized a child, from the age of five.

And now he is unstoppable; still on the quest the universe had given his hand.

He's a transcendental man.

And he's sorry.

Silver skin and copper veins
Rusty joints and beta brains
No one thought, I.E. Me
Would get to FEEL differently
My mouth could say the functions
Every thing from meaning to time
To the way airplanes mimic birds
But never could it find those words
And yet with your presence
Your file hidden and bound
A corruption in my databanks
404 Not Found.
I can name you every color
In the spectrum of the light
I cannot seem to find a name
In the coloring of your eye
I cannot name your existence
It's far different than I
I am but a robot
And you are something I cannot describe
How can you compute
Even more than me
Yet still have the essence
To make you want to BE
What ARE you?
What have you done?
You've made me feel frightened
Of what I've become
I know I am not a robot
But that is how I think
So with this Will I have installed
What will become of Me?

I am afraid to imagine  
I don't know what
could make me happier
to shake the hand of
a new found friendship
to really get to know someone
talk for a while
never judge by looks
or just a pretty smile
what really matters is
whom we find inside  
we have to see whats there
we might be surprised of the
friendships we could share
we have to analyze, ask questions
and take the time to get to know them
yet it's not always easy to open up
never judge their book by its cover
don't over look the qualities
that looks can sometimes hide

vast vivid wilderness
analyze politicians mind
hypocrites world dies in lies
moral devolution,hiding in white
lose of mind,gravity inside
zero nothing, sometime
1 is a separate thing
a velvet plaything
breathing in the fumes
lobotomized muse

trying to do what is right
don't forget, never forget
to start walking in the grey
memories they slowly fade
from this harsh reality
exist inside, resist tide
inside you'll see it die
justify your wicked mind

the eyes torture tantalize
3 rings, out in time
bombarding mind
find it not linear time
time line separate thing
velvet plaything
treated like lobotomized dogs
vast vivid life of pain
wires forced into my brain

trying to do what is right
don't forget, never forget
to start walking in the grey
memories they slowly fade
from this harsh reality
exist inside, resist tide
inside you'll see it die
justify your wicked mind

Call me your *****,
And I'll call you my muse,
Rip the seams off my flesh,
So I be free from the rules,
Human limitations are all milk and honey,
A pig mask latch on a car crash dummy,
And I'm thrashing thoughts,
Because of you I'm a mess,

The pyres of loves,
Sparked a lot of buzz,
In a bag of tattered memories,
Gnawed upon by Louisiana bugs,
I'm a would be killer with a open book of matches,
But will I draw the first flame,
To turn these pictures into ashes?

Or will I still be that lover,
That nailed a stop sign on his chest,
Hanged himself on every question mark,
That you sent to me direct,

See I'm no blind fruit rooting from your garden,
I'm just that dummy who believed you never leave me hollow hearted,

******* society
For making people believe
That there is a certain way to live and breath
Everyone is the same, there is no variety
You outcast those for rioting
And living their life defiantly
What gives you the right to judge me
You are not god almighty
You are the reason for my anxiety
And loss of sobriety
And visits to the psychiatry
But I stand in protest finally
I will no longer sit quietly
And let you decide unjustifiably
What I should be

Your judgment makes people feel insecure
Why do you believe that everyone has to be similar
Why don't you understand that no one is perfect
Why do I have to conform to your culture to earn respect
Why is money the only way to achieve success
Every person lives just like the next
This makes me feel so depressed

*******, I chose to be unique
I refuse to live a life that's boring and bleak
My life does not need to be critiqued
Your approval will not bring relief

Happiness is key
I will live happy and free

An over-analytic,
overbearing,
misguided idiot.

That about sums it up.