You don’t know

That I trace

Three words

On your back

In every language that I know

So that it sinks into your skin,

So that your soul knows before your ears ever do

if i die young, know i died unhappy and life’s unfair,
if i grow old and die traditionally,
know i died unhappy and life was a misery

i’d tell you a tale
of all of my life’s history
but it would all be derailed and all sound pale
in the words of my mouths contradictory
so i’ll leave you with my frail words for the cemetery;

if i die young, know i died unhappy and life’s unfair,
if i grow old and die traditionally,
know i died unhappy and life was a misery

when i’ll die, i’ll die artistically
candle lights, speaking words lyrically
and if youll ask me if i could go back and do it all again, if i’d make a change,
i’d say in a heartbeat
and if i did, i wouldn’t have to repeat

if i die young, know i died unhappy and life’s unfair,
if i grow old and die traditionally,
know i died unhappy and life was a misery

for i didn’t do it my way,
i did it life’s way
if a decision could have swayed
me in another direction,
i would be happier, in the life of my correction,
that got lost and died with life
while i waited to come back to mine

so if i die young, know i died unhappy and life’s unfair,
if i grow old and die traditionally,
know i died unhappy and life was a misery

and to my life, i miss you
and to my cat-child, i miss you
and to my moms eyes, i miss you
and to my sister-child, i miss you
and to what was once mine, i miss you

And words
are like birds
that keep flying in my thoughts
and far away.

“When I die,
return me to nature.
I don’t want to be in a wooden hug,
that’s as dead as I’ll be.
I want my hands gripping grass,
and my lungs filling with dirt.

Don’t give me flowers,
if they’re not planted
on my last blanket.

One day I’ll die,
until then, I’ll enjoy
every second of being.”

A.V.

The poets dwell
within their Hell
on a Sabbath day
witching hour

Their minds a wreck
Their hands  
of tech
They grind their teeth
in angst

Silence staid
The beds unmade
Searching for who
knows what

Snaps a pencil
It's indefensible
He can't go back
to bed

Quasimodo?
Was he noble ?
Played center for
Notre Dame

Came draft day
He was cast away
Which foot was it
you ask ?

Well the venom's drip
that sank a ship
Manned by mushroom
brained morons

Will be the first
to experience the worst
That trickles down
that piggies leg

"We all live in a yellow submarine"
It's just another "Day in the life"
After all happiness is a
warm warm gun

Re-ember.

I remembered,

Warmth, light

In and outside.

Smaller yet bigger

Me

I remembered,

The joy, delight

Looking,

Upside down

Lefter then right

I remembered,

A place so big

With people inside

Caring

for a little sprite.

I remembered

Long ago

Wisdom

Play

It re-embered

The will to go,

And stay.

You and nature get along well,
Blue skies, brown eyes, green thumb.
Have you seen the spirits lately,
Does the river ever ask about me?

Look outside this spring,
See sunlight shine away the winter,
After endless rain,
Dark soil calling new growth.

And if it feels like nature to you as well, lets
Reduce our distance, plant roots again,
Reuse our same old jokes, repeat our favorite dates,
Recycle all this love we have, it can be new and feel the same.

There's a firework inside my head
Pulling me away from tasks
Begging me to rest
Slamming the doors to others

Maybe it's "me time" once again
Just me, and the quiet of being alone

For Her
Appearance doesn't matter,
But a kind heart does.
Unwanted attention? No.
A true shoulder to lean on — yes.
Fake concerns don’t move her,
But sincere words always will.

Yes —
She may seem strange to you,
Because you can't decipher her soul.
She’s a rare gem
Amid all the world’s noisy pleasures...
She shines brightest
In the quiet kingdom of her own world.

You and your romantic ways, your countless list of reasons, your lovely lilac haze
Shadowed only by your fears there's not a universe where I stay.

Battled me.

And all my disarray
The timing and the distance, my thoughts that force resistance.
My lack of patience sure put up a fight, and mix her with my temper and we'll be here all night.
My fear, always ready to run, pulling me back behind the wall I built, away from the warmth of your sun.

Today i learn that "i don't care" has a deep meaning
1. Disappointment from expectations
2. Forgiving people too many times
3. Too many things to think about
4. Just literally don't care like how the heck can people just be careless, must've been through lots of things

My eyes droop and grasp at the acknowledgment of darkness.
The brain wanders and runs from these memories.
Hands curl and scrape the desperation into the silicone skin
Close your eyes. Let the ability to feel go.
Let it go and feel at peace.

I never wished you bad,
    I wish you the best, after you broke me.
What is stolen departs,
    & when I cried and you laughed,
I never as your enemy,
    for the love you want , you wont find in him.
your yes will watch, his distant gaze,
     as it continues to depart, for another's bloom
          that will mirror my ghost.
that will be your constant fear,
            for everything in life is paid in one way,
and he will do the same thing to you.
            I just wish you realize, before you're in my place.

Wind pulled us closer,
Love made us one.
Effort kept us strong,
God made it lifelong.

At the end of each conversation
You won
In your favor
With your own law
In your own court
Like a good narcissist
As a good soldier
Same as the torturer
At the end of the night
Will begin another day
And I win
On top of the mountain of the false loss
Lives the king
Doomed to your hell
Placed in an actual heaven
At the end of the poem
You're just a puppet
Feeling like the master
How do I know this?
Cause devil's in the details
So sit still my friend
Behind the steel bars
Do you see them even
Oddly with your closed eyes?

a flame shadow-boxes a dance
with it's reflection in a cup
the scent of sandalwood
burns rings in the dark

taking too long to stand, forcing straight
the back of a now older man

before turning to bed & book

clicking of the nightstand lamp
straining eyes & resting mind
seek the comfort of thoughtless dreams
that drift through the night

sweet

I never want to see her again
I want just one more chance
I can't believe she left me
I need just one last kiss

a transplanted heart
new body and new rhythm
a hymn with each breath

dressed to ****
and well yes there was
blood on her
skirt but I know
that’s not what
you meant

What a Lovely face,
lovely eyes,
lovely hair,
and an even lovelier smile

Your beauty astounds me
your kindness so vast,
your memories surround me
I am falling steady and fast

I would be lying if I say
You don't give me butterflies
that I light up when I'm you every day
Light up so bright like fireflies

What a lovely face,
lovely eyes,
lovely hair,
and an even lovelier smile

What demands our attention today?  
A war devoid of consequences,  
Or a history shaped by creationism?  
A stillbirth born without shame?  
Vivid pain and haunting memories linger.  
A wedding absent of both bride and groom—  
Did we call for the ceremony too soon?  

The Gen Z lifestyle is riddled with artificial deceptions.  
An unforgettable presidential race stands as a historical disgrace.  
Did the pope truly have a closed casket,  
Or was it merely a non-cadaver?  

Platforms like Facebook are swarming with scammers—  
More than we've ever witnessed before.  
Referrals are obsolete;  
Being broke has become a norm,  
Your wallet may as well be smoking.  
Buy one, get one free—Temu’s prices tempt us all.  
This is the reality of U.S.-China trade tariffs.  

Are our lives dictated by the Bollywood Referrals Act?  
Isn’t that the truth?  
Comsi comsa.

A breath caught,
snagged on a jagged edge,
pure, white terror blooms,
a blinding fog.

Footsteps echo,
too loud,
everywhere, a frantic pulse,
a hummingbird trapped.

Panic, a cold fist
around the throat,
can't see, can't think,
just run. Where?
Doesn't matter, just away.
Blind.

red is for love, its filled with hate
orange is anxiety, an unoptimistic trait
yellow is decaying, rotting quickly
green is selfish and sickly
blue is not only sad, but melancholy
purple is the deep bruising, form your unfortunate folly
white is the cabinet, stained red with hate
brown is the decay that yellow can make
black and blue is her face from his selfishness
purple she turned, when she lost to the sickness.

I flirt with myself and embrace the tiny dot.  
Am I truly in love or a snail in the celestial knot?  
I wish to be happy, but my days say not.  
Depression is within me, and elsewhere seen fought.  

My planets betray me by not even talking back.  
I will die a spark that never grew back.

a dream catcher’s
dreams catch her
dream catching
dreams
while naked, she slips
through rivers and
streams
confessing her sins
she silently
screams
as her dream catcher’s
dreams catch her
dream catching
dreams

It stops one from moving ahead;
Makes them overthink and do nothing instead

Sleepless nights and terrible thoughts
All one can do is listen to sad songs.

Why does it follow us everywhere?
Keeps us drepessed and in despair?

Fear is the greatest weakness
Let it go or it'll turn into sickness;

There is a way
Face it and say it's okay;
It's just a bad feeling which will eventually vanish away.

to feel nothing and everything
with no in between
to feel ever so deeply
but knowing these feeling aren't yours

empathy?

or is it mimicking
because the incapability of actually feeling

Something Special
Grandpa used to bring simple candies.
His knock on the door would spark our excitement.
And why was he so kind, after all?
He taught me chess,
loved to read,
was a Labourist.
I don’t remember much else.
It's sad he left this world too soon.
I think I would’ve learned more about him
if I were older.

I met a lady
A lady of dreams
I was naive
A little bit green.
I gave her my heart
I gave her my soul
She churned me up
And spat me out
Straight
Into a
begging bowl.
I hatched a plan
I didn’t go well
Im serving twenty
In this prison cell.
Moral of the story
Read the label
On the tin
Before you open it
And find what’s
Within.