Please let me tell you
About your positivity
The way you patch
Me up and send me out
Sorry to be melodramatic
But I somehow feel dramatic
As I am thrown out to the wolves

And I am sorry to have
To tell you but I have just
somehow become immune
to all your positives, like steroids
you keep on pumping  into me
And I am afraid that my soul
has just retract and gone different
way
sorry but I can no longer
pretend to be made of steel
Not for you
Or any positive view

Ok then lets go out
put on a jacket
Hunter gatherer
Lets go get her
Stand in a queue
talk to a girl or two
pretend that what
she had just said    
did not hurt you
And maybe instead
of getting kissed
We can just get ******

We can start to look a mess
while they judge us on our dress
The way we speak
The job we have
The money we don't have
The size of our house
the car we drive
Can we make them laugh
or are we just a bit boring
You say I have no confidence
But is this just a coincidence

You tell me I am all
of this and all of that
But I am tired of all that
As you lift me in
a hydrogen balloon  
Just a little *****
again I feel a ****
So I will tell you
Who I am
ADAM is who I am
always have been  
Always will be
just Adam
nothing more
nothing less  

And what I say to you
As a friend
I really
LOVE YOU
But what I don't
need from you
is your positive view
All I need
IS JUST YOU

To my dear Kay
You hold me up
After a long day
As you speak from
So far far away
It is as though
It was only yesterday

If only I could
hold you tonight
It would be with
such a delight
You would make my
life a great play
So come without delay
I ask you pretty please
you **** little tease

And let your heart
open up to me
And tell me what
You want to see
You may think me
A silly little cheese  
But I will shock
you with a squeeze

How I so adore
The tiger's tempers roar
releasing you to soar
How this fruitful fire
helps you to aspire
capturing all my desire
And remember when
the day is dawning
I will be totally
naked in the morning

All dressed up for the ball
I remain locked away
From the dancing floor of love
Marooned on the side lines
As couples dance and swing
Within there completed circles
Am I to sing on the roof tops
Dance naked in the rain
What will it be
For them to see

As I silently beg
like a lost child
I wonder around a giant maze
Desperately looking for the center
And only find many dead ends
Searching with a fear
As a chasing Minotaur
Is on my back
As every romantic triumph
Dissolves into a chaotic car crash
I throw myself into
A swamp of disgust

I am the old romantic steam
Engine all run out of puff
Stationed on the platform of self
I am just a novel excursion
For the kind soul to play
Placed so so far away
In an antagonized frustration
I hammer the last nail into
The coffin of the other as all
Thoughts and dreams of a
Partner die buried in the ground
Bare foot on pebbles
I wobble in the thought
Of a life with aloneness

As many beasts surround me
Wishing to devour my happiness
Like a T-REX! I stand tall
And I gobble , them all ! up
YUMMY YUMMY
For my heart reins
Like a king over all
As it is my heart that sparkles
When the music plays
With many dashes and flashes
Fluctuating colors within my heart
I am a walking road show
A disco fever
With the Minotaur slain
I find the center of my maze

No longer at the mercy
Of the fickle other
Released from the confines
Of my political mind
A million jack in the boxes
Spring out of me
As I am surprised
By the many treasures
The Lord placed in me
As many ring and sing
All birds collect in me
In the end the old romantic
Finds his steam and iron strength
Puff puff puff into the country I chug
As i whined myself into Gods beauty

The death of the other
Can be the beginning
A deeper adventure
Into your sweet self
So off we all chug

As the glorious LION
Stands strong in stature
Radiating with a presence
Of Absolute rule
The air washed with
A bristly respect
A natural pride
Beams with  beauty
He guards the gateway to truth
and only the brave may enter
He is the king that needs no crown
as he holds a royal presence as he
sits in his golden coat and main
Lies spark combust just bounce off
dissolve in all his shine.  

As broken men become renewed
Their fractured parts
Collect in the melting ***
Of the Lion's  stare
As they are engulfed and swallowed
In the reservoirs of his strength
As the many wounded souls
Find themselves restored
In his majestic presence
As he rattles the very fabric
Of this world

There is no procrastinating belly
Exposed by a lackluster display
No one insults his strength
By creating a make believe world
Or covers him with scaffolding so
That they may alter him
For he is the finished article
And he is never held up or supported
With anyone's emotional ropes or strings
For he no ones puppet
He is never silenced
By the Strangle hold of this world
Tightened with a multitude of gestures
For I hear his ROAR!!!!!!!!
His explosive self expression
As his throat bursts and beams like the sun
Breaking all collars, and his tongue is freed
As a thousand trap doors Open up in him  
And boulders are lifted and rocks are shattered
within the sound of his voice.
His Soft pads of silent stealth
Gather for all his wealth
As the power of his pounce
Is governed by both his strength
Of spirit and the honesty
With which he meets the earth
For he owns all of his own pain
And paces and growls to warn
Away any who seek to steal his fresh ****
And diminish him with pretty lies
For he owns all his space
As it feeds his strength
As somewhere in the fury of feasting
Lionesses and Lions  
We find our freedom
For his power explodes like a volcano
When his soul meets the earth  
As he shakes off all avoidance
To seek only truth
As streaks of white light
And pure Gold glisten in the SUN
As the world's projections
Reflect and bounce off him

There is so much to learn
From a beautiful LION

Come on everyone don't be
like reluctant children on the
first day of their schooling.
Oh cloudy dark days, its really
not that bad, plenty
more twists in the story.

Lets all join hands stop
swearing tell everyone at
the top we are all together
and not moving.
OK come on,with  no doubts lets go,
go Brexit, but then lets paint it
red and not blue.
Wave to Mr Murdoch and say Ha ha to
you, you lost after all.  

Let us temper the angered
words dealt snake bit and
venom.
Brutal exchanges like Klitschko
and Joshua now is the time for
the hug right after.
You know when we are all slinging
mud and shouting someone
some where in power is betting.
And they are the only one that will
be winning.

Time now is for us to look in with
rolling hills, roses and blackberry
bushes.
Sandy beaches, prickly thorns and
mystery round circles of stones.
Coated in gentle breezes alike a
kindly uncle the weather protects
us.
And what do I find that sweet soft
tender, holly in the winter and roses
in the summer.
little England
And not something to be ashamed of
but something to be
proud of.

Time is now for us all to be free as there
is always darkness just before a birth.
Like a brave bird breaking free only
the brave seeds make it into a tree.
As not every parent knows what
is right for their child.

But lets not then look for the common
wealth and all its crimes.
let us simply be
Little England
That subtle feeling we hold
As we all know all the answers
live
INSIDE

May I tell you a little secret
But please don't let anyone know

That I am not strong
But actually weak

That I don't know
where I am going
Lost in rough sea
I cling to my tiny boat
With no life jacket

That if you look at me closely
You see my house  
Is made of cards
And not brick

That every day I turn of the sound
Holding cotton to my ear
As the world sings a song
My mind doesn't want to hear

That the bravado of a ******* man
Swinging a shirt above his head
Hides a little boy
Who was bullied at school

That I am like the little girl
Who slept with every guy in town
But was actually scared  
To sleep with just one

Or the guy who could
Have every single girl
But to scared to take his pants off
So hid in the Loo

That every day I close my eyes
As I walk a narrow path
With a shear drop on either side

That I scale a rope bridge
Across a great raven
Made with a decaying wood

That I sometimes do things
I wish not to do
I will even be your play thing
If it helps me fit in

That I do not possess Rhino skin
It is actually paper thin
Every word can break my skin  

That my heart doesn't roar
But hides like a
Little Lamb stuck in
A Lion's den

Thank you for letting me
Share my little secret
But please don't let anyone know
That I am not strong
But very weak

Rippling waves bursting through
Encaged chests springing, smashing
and smashing as all love is
rolling over

In the Love of the abandoned ocean

Breaking shells and all packaging
                  a packaging  
          Love never wanted
           All love being free
      Its depths to be accessed
                 For all to see

             Oh the great Sea
        The abandoned ocean
             No one can see

    Whispering sweetly it tickles
        Relaxing all our stresses
          Soothing our shores
        As it lovingly caresses
            Enticing us all in
            

   How the abandoned ocean
      tries so hard to get us
        All to just jump in

      Foolishly men with their
   backs to the ocean stare sadly
  in dismay at empty rock faces
   rigorously searching under
   pebbles and hidden places

With all the love of the abandoned
      ocean sitting behind them

  Lifting itself up and over
      The ocean pours its
        Love all over
Giant Whales start calling
   Comeback comeback
    We are all waiting

       In an eternal forever
       rhythm no stalling
      just keep on pouring
   Waves smash and bash
breaking our cliffs and edges

    That push away the Love
Of this vast abandoned ocean

May the Love of this ocean
find its way as it smashes
through hard places seeping  
through hidden spaces
As it penetrates us all
so very very deeply

    Let us all return to the
      LOVE OF THIS
ABANDONED OCEAN

Precious moments , precious moments
Where all the curves in our time lead
As ancient promises are fulfilled
And the air speaks with a delicate whisper
As I hold my breath
As the moment did all my breathing
Like it contained a heart beat

But here comes the megalomaniac
Explosive words of dynamite
Climatic , craters in the air
I despair , For I am nothing more
Than another field for harvest
As uncontrollable envy erupts
The megalomaniac can not stop
Like president Putin all armies
Push on with out him

Voices scream and holla
STOP STOP STOP
Ears drowned out by jealousy
He can not hear , as his armies
Trample , all over precious moments
Many tanks Many bombs
I am left shell shocked , as the obsessed
Megalomaniac pushes on blindly
Hypnotized by his insecure arrogance

My broken heart weeps
With its insufficient soul
having no ability to
Recover precious moments
As he wakes with a stretch , a yarn
A mind clear and without consequence
While years later I am in darkness
Still searching internal forests
Of great wisdom , so that
Some where I may find my forgiveness

You never reach the megalomaniac
They never listen , only to inner voices saying
CONTROL CONTROL CONTROL
Never stopping to think
AM I HARMING
Possessed by power
Sponsored by a world of fears
But I know I must forgive
If only the pain I carry could be seen
My soul would seek its equilibrium
But megalomaniac's never see
In a strange irony they destroy
That witch they envy
And seek to control

I must forgive I see
My heart clenched like a fist
As I fear the sun will never
Again rise within me
I sit , so very still
In hope that my heart
May find its forgiveness
For I have felt glimpses
Of forgiveness shine through
The leaves within this dark forest
As occasional breaks in clouds
Draw me closer to clarity

Although i live in shadows and the
Megalomaniac has long since left the scene
I see his lost ,contorted , twisted mind
A burden of struggling confusion
And I am brought to compassion
As I see he is lost , just like me
I seek to stretch into greater space
And begin to give GIVE
A little before FOR
So that i may be free
Before he can even see

As a silly  spoilt child
Disgruntled I grumble
Throughout my blessed life
Complaining about my loss
That God does not give a toss

But abundantly  in my life
Scattered in my garden
Live deep hidden forests
Sacred special spaces
Forgotten mossy places
Things I can not see  

In my soft mossy pastures
I am drawn into sound
Soft rich earthy ground
My meddling hands resigning
And my heart softening
To the treasures God is bringing

As a child I am sometimes
still screaming for what
I am not receiving  
Even though chosen
But my loving Father
Always refusing to
serve me poison

But he keeps on giving
Life's unexpected gifts
Full of presents and parcels
An unknown cultivated Karma
A forgotten ignored pleasure
Actually look at all the treasure
Everyday a Christmas tree
If I could only look and see

So in my adult days
I learn to look on
In different ways
With a mossy heart
I nourished and softening
receiving parcels tenderly
passed down from heaven

Shush please
Silence your mind
For I hear you
predicting my future
But I tell you
As I tell myself
I am no
Commodity

As I sometimes feel
The earth from under me
Kind of crumbles
Only to find  
My rockets
My vibrations

Like a bat i fly
My future a blank
For me it is
An adventure
Out of my cast
I explode I blast

For a moment please
Stretch out a place
Dig a hole
right
Through
your mind
Into an
outer space  
Help me find

Leave a moment
A gap
Just a chance
For a new future
To be found
But I need silence
All around

I am a flower in a forest
Filled with trees
And wisdom
Please take of your cloths
And slip in for  
something new to begin

Not all defeat is bitter
Sometimes it lifts you up
Arms out stretched
Standing on a mountain

Sometimes life can be confusing
Perplexed standing on a podium
Holding a Gold Cup
While the winner
Gets a wooden spoon,
Even nothing

Sometimes defeat can give you
A little lift,
A little bounce
In your step
As though you were
Carried by an elephant

Sometimes winners crawl back
To their cages while you
Enjoy outstretched spaces
In all your vast freedom  

Sometimes defeat dresses
You in purple
Crowns you as King
And says Go On
Claim your Kingdom

Sometimes after all the
cursing,
Defying God
You realize you are cured
And God was only operating  

Sometimes after all the
Shouting and swearing
You discover the world has
Become much sweeter

And sometimes after all the
Thrashing and splashing the
The water becomes much stiller
And you see all the colour
In the coral

And sometimes when you fall
Into these deep waters
You may hear a mermaids call
Telling you your destiny's pull

Sometimes defeat can be your glory
As you find the air is brighter
And your friends are kinder
Even the birds sing louder  

Sometimes defeat is not your
Enemy but actually your saviour
Pointing you the way out
Rescuing you from a great fire

Sometimes defeat is your closest friend
Holding you tenderly like a lover
Protecting you where it matters
The outside world in tatters

I don't care because
Not all defeat, is bitter
Sometimes it lifts you up
With arms outstretched and
Places you on a mountain

When I am full of regrets
But it is not just my fault  

Because someone said
You canot blame

A thousand fingers
Point at me
But I scream ,
         "It was not just me "

Tired of those who
Talk of self responsibility
But act without impunity
And with disregard

With the rug of power
Pulled from under me
I am forced to **** it and see

Many talk of positivity
Claiming to be free

But I cannot control all
Sometimes letting be
As I am not master
Of the universe you see

And when I wear their positivity
Wrapping up tightly
I find it gives me blisters
Everywhere I walk

So when I feel my regrets
And it is not just my fault
Powerless as I walk
And cannot get on
With their positivity
And I am not free

But when bravely admitting
All the above I start
And look and see  
I start to be
At least half free

Realizing it is ok
To say it is not just me

OUTSIDE VOICES

I have been troubled by
Many outside voices

who say "You did not try "

Please do not say I never tried
Because I saw her turmoil
I saw her tortured confusion
As she was pulled and twisted
From here to here by all
For am I to take part
Tie her in the racks
Stretch and contort her
For I could only Love her

Other voices thought me a looser

Said I must not falter
Like its all about
Bricks and mortar
Like how many houses
Do you own
Like how many lady's
Do you own

Other voices said "where is your strength
Where is your passion "

Well I say my inaction
Showed far more affection
And passion for her soul
And the strength to hold her
While not grabbing her
As she passed through
Took the roots from
A Thousand forests
As all my love is free
And I can only make her a nest
And offer her a place to erst

Other voices said " Spill the beans
to reclaim your power "

I see reclaim my power
So I may stand on a tower
While she slips into a whirlpool
Of contorted emotional chaos
I am sorry but I am not infected
With the human disease
POWER AND CONTROL
And is not inspired
To rip and tear
Even if women secretly declare
They like being dragged by their hair
If that is the way they choose
I guess I really do loose

For my love could only carry her through

But I say to all of this
It is the Love that lets go
Which lives the longest
As I still here her laughter
My LOVE will be felt long after

Turning into peach
I feel a tender baby
My young ****** heart
Unspoiled by the world
Like a seed it carries
All my future growth

Living within an empty casket
A vessel of infinite space
The hardest peach stone
Two half's , In GODS two
Hands he holds me tight
Within the hardest rock
I feel cradled and protected
Trusting the whole
As it carries me safely

Shinning brightly within
My blistering white core
Curled up deeply
My space , I site silently
Contemplating peacefully
As all attacks from the
World can not touch me
My chest expands with the
Growing space inside me
Where I feel the world
And my love ,which
Sit beside me

Rolling outwardly I radiate
Yellow like the sun
Shining brightly
As I feel many flavored
Layers of delicious juice
Wrapped in my body
Bathed in a fleshy beauty
I am rich in blissful
Golden bounty

As I reach out
I touch the world
With a delicate hair
On my furry surface
Of soft carpets and sofa's
Fluffy blankets and cushions
Where hearts and souls
Collapse into lovers arms
With abandoned minds

As we roll around
In each other charms
With the ease of
Bended knee's
As we hear resonatingT
Tones of humming
Heart strings collide
As our empty center's
Can only attract
As we fall and embrace

As together in Intimacy
We turn into delicate peach

I am the lazy
Laid back surfer
Lounging and living
Drinking cocktail martini's
With my disheveled hair
My parent despair
For what is the hurry
Making no impulsive decision
For why the hurry
With so much of this fun
In this beautiful sun
As I talk to Dave
Waiting for the perfect wave

When forces of financial
Destruction smash against me
Wave after wave
Wash over me
As I am a rock and
Nothing penetrates you see
As I am the cliff that pushes
Back at rough sea
As a thousand years of
Character are washed
In my rock face
For I am the perfect surfer
Simple needs, dry perspective
As it is only really money

Standing on my board
I remain on top
As I am always objective
Swallowed by no
subjective under current
I keep myself in balance
Never engulfed by emotion
Like the many that fall
As I sail over emotion
Like the eagle sails over sky
Wiped out before
I now stay on top
Because I know where to stop
And remaining alert in
These financial waters
For there is a slight risk
Of meeting great whites

I am the perfect surfer
And surfs up today
Well rested I move swiftly
As I seek the giant wave
The perfect cycle
As I slip into the tunnel
Of the perfect wave
With water and emotion
All around me , I remain
Dry and objective
As i enjoy the thrill and spill
As white waters splash I dash
And dance and play
On the waves today
Effortlessly gliding
I feel the blissful froth
As i am taken further
And further

Life would be so much easier
If we could all learn from
The perfect surfer

Picking up the pieces
Now the storm has gone
Possessed I was by
A wild hurricane

As mighty winds blew fast
Broken windows, door and glass
As I now live in the debris
Of my mistaken past

Where my self destruction
Was my, favorite past time
And my stupidity was
A partner in crime

Cursed I was by my
Own devils scorn
As fire grew I burnt
Both my body and soul

But now I see in all
The scattered mess
Like a photo album
All my rich past

As I clear the ruins
Of  my broken parts
And brick by brick
I begin to rebuild

Repairing broken windows
I  let a new light in
And when sweeping the floors
I see the reflection an old self  

And I thank God it is
Time for me to rest
As all the angry fuel has
Gone from my empty chest

Please don't ask me to trust
Because I trusted in places
Where most have never entered

Don't tell me to believe
As my belief was far greater
And deeper than you could know

As I tasted nectar
That told me
I could have anything
I wanted

A wind blew through me  
As though the Lord
Had whispered
Make A wish my son
And it will be so

But all came to nothing
And now the Genie has gone
And I am locked alone
In a darkened room

So don't ask me to follow
Your blind trust
As the blind fall

And when they are sensitive
They fall harder and deeper

So I will never follow
Your blind faith
And I reject your trust
To build a kingdom on
Distrust, distrust, distrust

And I carry and cradle her
Broken promises by people
And the Gods
Lay like rubble
Under my feet
And form my foundation

For really what is trust worth
If given so freely

Never will I follow blind faith
To falsely fly
As I will never trust
To become falsely great

But wait and wait
And when trust comes
TRUST IS GREAT

Shared moments , special friends
Contrasting the chaos

And when the flowers of
Faith blossom
They will be rare and sacred

Temples which only the
Silent may enter

But do not ask me to follow your trust

Softly closing my eyes
As I let
The world depart

Gently close my hands
Upon my heart

As I cradle
Lord Jesus Christ
In my palms

I hold him
So very near
So very dear

Lord

In your strength
I feel so weak

So help me daily
To take a careful step

As I care for you
You care for me

So please
Draw me close
Into
Love for you

For
LORD
I love you
SO

Bereft of all dignity
Stricken with wounds of humiliation
My shield of honor ripped away
As I am trampled under foot
And dragged for all to see
Bellowing screams steal
The dark caverns of my belly
Like a thousand lost souls
Leaving my mind destitute

Fearing the worst
And Sensing the forces of pride gathering
As he searches for an allie
The soul cries out
NOT TONIGHT , NOT TONIGHT
The soul sinks into solitude
And prays for silence
But all is lost
As pride rings the trumpets of war
For freedom has joined his side

The heart splits in two
Half a heart cries for lost love
All dreams like caged birds set free
Released into the vast blue skies
By the powers of freedom
The soul watches powerless
As they drift away
While the other half roars
like 10 Hungary Lions

Pride picks up his shield of honor
And defiantly stairs
Into the eyes of fate
Carried forward on the chariots of freedom
That know no boundary
Between life and death
The enemy shudder
As with his last breath
He spits in there face

Broken free he now floats
Freely , on the cool winds
With all the caged birds
He has now set free

I am Lion dressed as lamb
A King wearing a woolly coat
As my eyes turn red with
an increasing heart beat
and the heat of the sun
I know I have to run
While weaker men may
cry and weep in the battle
field they pray.
My laughter like armour
ripped from dead bodies
clatters through their soul.
And amongst all the waste
sliding down the valley they
hear my voice echo as they
know they have met the
GOD OF WAR.
Press me and you may find
an almost pessimistic mind
but only because i build a
house with stone.

A thousand  times I offer my love
a thousand times the world says no.
A thousand times I search for God
and only find a silence, a nothing.
A thousand times I seek my fortune
and only find fools gold.
My mind my 2 inch thick skull beaten
and folded, layered and layered fire
welded like the finest sword.
Strengthened with the forces of
fire and water, sharpened and
grounded by the trials of life.
For there is no need for fantasy
walk on water fairy tale land
with my battle hardened mind.

And the devil you are all so
frightened of he is mine and
I love him.
As I am here to free your mind
so let it be pessimistic critical
unleash your dragon.
For unlike all your GURU'S
I say the battle is not inside
but on the outside.
I never get lost or disappear
into  the black hole of my
mind but hold the blackness
up in the face of darkness.

All the No's of my mind become
my spear my shield.
Standing square all the world
fears my sword.
A hardened head a shield i carry
in front of me. with an unleashed
love I am pulled forward.
As a million soldiers stamp their
feet inside my head.
With spiraling forces expressing
curling themselves onward.
As I drill out new spaces
in new places.
  As I am swept up by the cogs
of space and time I get a glimpse
of GODS passion.
Completely protected I smash  
and smash myself forward as
I am like a planet sling shot
around.

Though my mind may feel closed
my heart is always open.
Riding on an expanding natural
force I know myself to be much
bigger.
As you cannot contain the power
of my yes anymore than an
exploding universe.
As God says no amount of no's
stopped me making all of you.
By being hear I know I have
already won.
As I have been bursting out of
sun spots, super nova's stars
ever since time began.

Much can be learn't from the RAM
with his soft heart and hard mind.

With the knowledge of celebration
I gaze into night skies
Slipping into a vast black nothingness
But there are  no stars which sparkle in me
As I wonder how a life
Which began so centered
And carried such conviction
Sailing towards success and freedom
Finds itself scattered  like drift wood
Across many shores

Deep inside my being lives
A brave young Knight , on a quest
As he strides with purpose
Of to slay the Red Dragon
That hoards boundless wealth

Back on the outside I puff in displeasure  
As i guess its a masked ball for me
As I placing a smile on my gristly face
And wear my orange chorus party coat

The young Knight reaches the
Great Red Dragon's kingdom
And finds him  deep in his lair
With beautiful bright  red scales that glitter
As he restlessly guards  his huge  treasure

Back at the party I force my demeanor
But like a iron breast plate my heart
Weighs heavy underneath my
Orange chorus coat
As I am split in two

In the lair the dragon breaths out
A both tantalizing and ferocious firey focus
Warning the Knight well away
As the dragon holds on and holds on
As he knows the world seeks  his treasure
But deep down ,  he is divided as an
Imprisoned part  longs for the sky
And to stretch his wings

Back at the party I am an onlooker
Feeling numb and divided as
Though my past had placed
One of my feet in the grave

At the lair the Dragon remains
Torn between his treasure and the sky
But in a moment of madness
He takes flight leaving his treasure behind

At the party i accidentally catch a young ladies eye
And for a moment my stone heart is pliable like butter
As I feel a new relaxed rigor in my stride

The dragon looks down and see's his treasure disappear
And feels naked like they were ripping his cloths away
But carries on flying high searching the sky

Back at the party , I am totally let go
As my heavy heart drops away
And I dissolve into my ORANGE CHORUS COAT
I become the very essence of party
I feel light as through the wind blew  
Through me and I am lifted
Sparkling wine and stars shine

Sailing through the skies the
RED DRAGON returns to his castle
To find an amazing  surprise
As all the people through out the land
Now worship him and have put on a
Celebration and  great feast in his honor
And all promise to forever share their bounty
And bring many gifts to the
GREAT RED DRAGON  

Back at the party I gain a new lease of life
As though I had gained great  red wings
As I feel the space of my inner being fly

Have our Scottish hearts
Shrunk in the fields
Of foreign rule
Are we not greater
Than the fears
****** on us
Have we become mice
That scurry and hide
Only tempted out by cheese
Laid in many traps
Are we content
To live in the shadows
Of our neighbors ambition

I am not saying
Lets bury our minds
And drown in an
Optimistic ignorance
For we are all grown up
And know the risks
Are our abilities so short
And our hearts so weak
That we may be bold
Over so easily
Can we not find the strength
To fill our wobbly knees
Yes we all carry fear
Like all free men
But like William Wallace
We are not defined by our fear
For we stand tall and proud
And our honest hearts
Speak to us of Scottish potential
Much greater than fear

Do we not under estimate ourselves
Have we forgotten our heights and depths
As Scottish potential lies
Imprinted in the skies
By the Scottish highlands
And our emotional depths
And resources remain hidden
Undiscovered  in our many
Silent locks scattered
Throughout our land
And is not our toughness with an
Almost stubborn hardiness not found
Abundantly within our  heather
While golden eagles glide
A silent over seeing eye
Who breaths a Scottish clarity    

For I cry as rich men
Still seek to steal
Our many golden eggs
From the governor of the sky
Our most gracious Golden Eagle
So let all protect
All that is precious in Scotland
And let us cleanse our
Minds in the clear highland air
As we purge our hearts
With Scottish beauty
And release the stags
That will drive out  the
Many money lenders
That stifle our being

So let us all join together
As we are bound in the eternal
And not by pen or sword
And as we rediscover ourselves
We find our united voice
Of Scottish freedom

Standing on the edge of life
An edge to a great ocean
High up in the mountain
I stand crystal clear
But as cold as ice
My mind buried deep in stars
As a million winters collect
In my frozen belly
As I seek to thaw
My many icy layers
That separate me

Deep hidden strength sits in me
As ancient Mammoths
Preserved and buried
Frosted over , deep in ice
So let me wake these
Ancient beasts
Lying dormant
As I drive through
The torrid snow
The ice separating me
With these ancient beasts
I push against my
******* forces

Great stresses and forces
Conspire all around me
As they seek to
Twist and tangle me
But I am the King of escapology
As Houdini has nothing on me
As many forces locks and chains
Collapse around me
I just silently slip away
So I invite this world
To do its very worst
As there is not a box or barrel
That I can not escape

As I stand in my crispy coolness
I hear the silence
Of many hearts
As they all sing in chorus
REJOIN US , REJOIN US
As have I forgotten
The value of melting
As I stand tenderly waiting waiting
On the edge of life's richness
As I carry with me
All bravery of the most
Delicate crocus flower
As it keenly breaks
The winters snow
Waking the silent forest
It celebrates all that is new

Seeking now to live life
As freely as a fish
I am carried in the ocean
Almost weightless in this world
As I strip down my hidden parts
And loose all eye lashes
As I embrace this world
There is no need to hide
As I slip sleekly into
This vast ocean
Far away from buried self
The hermit in me
Seeking to almost loose myself
In the much buried love
Lying deeply in all hearts

My flower beds now released
From the deadly sleepy snow
I sew new wild pansies
Lets bring on the show
As all is embraced
By rejoining the  ocean

Please do not tell me
I am a God because I
tell you I am only human.
And I am really pleased
that your God really loves
you.
Make a wish and he will
supply you lovely job, beautiful
wife he will give you  
And how it all really worked
out for you and your respectful
family

Look I really am delighted for
all that has been given you.
But can you please please
go over there because we
are drowning over here.
And do not say we do not
paddle because we really
do so very fast.
And we are still sinking not
sure how long we can last.

I know by the look in your
face that you do not trust
that I am sincere when I
say I am joyous for your
happiness.
But what I will say is that
I am really trying
And when you wear your
happiness like a golden robe
I really try hard not to pull
on you.
As am sincere when I say
I want to be a good friend
as you seem so much better

They say knock and he will
come and I am glad your
God came.
But my hands gone numb
I now having bruised
and bleeding knuckles
and no one came.

I am truly really happy
for you but please
Remember some of us
are still drowning

Sometimes love can be a scary thing

Like walking into an empty
Castle ruin.
Where cobwebs clinging
to a moldy ceilings.

And spiders eyes pierce
through clammy darkness.
Skeleton hands touching the back
of our shoulders.

Floating across an empty ball room
I find myself remembering  
where all was buzzing,
bubbling and fun.
As I danced all night with
the queen of the ball
I bath in the memory of her
scented smile.

Drifting sideways through a wall
I enter a kitchen, with
a beast is chained to a wall,
and stand behind a large table.

A bright moon climbs through a
broken window and glares right
into my soul.

Pushed back I fall onto a collapsing
wall that sticking out of the ground
like a great crocodiles jaw.

Scrambling to my feet I hear the
sound of creaking floor boards,
where there are none.

A timeless essence pervades the room
as I am comforted by a distant
moon.

A soft silver energy spills into the
room and takes the shape of
A beautiful women.

The angry beast still chained
to the wall growls and howls
louder and louder, I shudder.

But as the lady softly speaks
the howl of the beast quickly
retreats.

Held in a straight jacket
we are braced by a
consuming silence.

Bewildered by her power
all my strength
collapsing onto the floor.

But slowly I observe fur
falling of the beast,
rippling
muscles begin to appear.

A giant stands up tall carrying a strength
greater than any dragon or beast.

All fragments of fur find life
rolling up together and
turning into a wolf.

As we all sit with each other
sunbathing in a silver moon
seeping into the room.

Lost with a beast in an abandoned
castle I am found and tamed
by this beautiful
fare maiden.

Gently together we are suddenly awoken
in a busy castle as we start remembering
something we had long ago forgotten.

How precious a love,
a gentle,
falling in love
can be.

Welcome to the world of Sci-fi
horror like a risky affair we
have all been courting,
but now it is really here.
And of course the reality is always  
far worse than the movie.
Like an alien attack or abduction
there is a flash of bright white
light.
As hot as the center of the sun
those underneath vaporize
into nothing.
Their remains like ghostly shadows
burnt into the scarred ground.
And as we drop deeper into hell
we find in terror
the devil runs out.

Survivors blinded, burnt, crawling,
moping and moaning as we find
ourselves living in a desert like
Zombie land.
An earth once full of life falls through
space like a discarded match burning
itself out.
Of course I can only talk for myself
as you maybe able to hold a flame
against an innocent child or old lady.
But if not maybe you should not,
like genocide be supporting it.  
Thousands screaming and crying but
I am sorry there no hospital and there
will be no ambulance coming.

So with Little Boy
such a friendly name
like the boy playing down the park.
Well 40 thousand died an hour after
that one was dropped.
Now imagine something 30 times as
strong something they call the
Ivy King,
king of the apocalyptic land.
And now imagine their latest celebration
they call Castle Bravo 1000 times
more powerful.
How many millions tens of millions
could that ****
Bravo bravo bravo.

But these are just numbers what if they
all each had a name like
Nikolai or Emiko
sorry maybe it would be better if
we did not give them a foreign
name maybe call them
Jenifer or John.
So do really want to give our
government permission to drop
a bomb like Hiroshima or Nagasaki.
Perhaps they would be safer if they
changed there cities names called them
something like Manchester or Birmingham.

Naughty boys boasting about their
conquers sit around tables playing
their poker bluff.
While injecting a fear into their
enemies heart they mind their p's and q's.
As they pretend to be civilized
but at the same time threatening
an annihilation.
Just so they may get the
Upper hand
A gas pipe or
Oil rich land.
But I don't want my life to be
someones negotiating tool.
So stop playing your silly game of
chance because if you loose the whole
worlds is gone.
Please someone tell them
this is really not a game.

I hope the world has realized more
bombs does not make it safer.
Maybe you think it is money well spent
or maybe like me you think it could be
spent curing cancer or the environment.    
Any on a personal note
I really do hope  
they give up trident.

I am the beautiful Scorpion Queen
Ruler of hidden places
Securer of hiding spaces
Buried often under rocks
Cautious of people
Who stamp over me
So I mastered the perfect sting
As those who encroach over me
I give a little ping

They say I look nasty
But I do it all for you
As I show you your true value
I will bite the hand that
Undermines you
As me and my children
Will protect your foundation
And cut the vines of envy
That strangle you
As I love sacred spaces

I lift the confusion from those
Who say all is one
But live on the outside
And trample over everyone
I cut the claws
With my jaws
Breaking the need to please

I say build your house
Before you build your city
As I preserve the
Sanctity of duality
The guardian of your cave
Protector of your temple
Keeper of your palace
A soldier who keeps on fighting
Fighting to the death
May you visit me
On memorial day
My life I feel complete
As I sew doubt splitting the world
Like a chisel into wood

But I celebrate dividing lines
And cut the white light
To give you colour
Let the rainbow shine
As I champion variety
The Goddess of individuality
As I give you difference
And hold the value of
Many shapes and sizes
I release you to your self portrait
Colourful Mosaic  
My nippers become the scissors
Of the Lord's dressmakers
As my tail does the needle work

I clear the muddled mind because
They all said you must say yes
I take away the guilt of no
Heavy shoulders weighed down by yes
And give you NO NO NO
NO to the controller
No to those who think
They know better
Dare a no to the precious Guru
For I will betray the Christ
Out of my Love for you

When they point their finger
I will make your point much sharper
I will rescue your sweet
Innocent soul  
Which can not defile
I will get my hands dirt
So you don't have to
They call me the betrayer
But what I want
Is for you to find
The real you
As my gift is
Your TRUE SELF

So much love to give
And possesses a beauty
That puts the Gods to shame
Our truly great SCORPION QUEEN

As the song of Scotland
starts to sing
All sounds of fear muffled
By our resonating hearts
For she is the silver stream
The babbling brook
There is no need
For a crook
As we sink in
The silver stream

We do not question
The English heart
For she loves
Our very own flower
But while clasping and
Gripping our thistle
So very tightly
She remains so confused
By the prickles of
Angst and hate
When our open hands
Remain without a blemish
As we do not hold your
Precious Rose

As it is the open hand
That offers the way
And the integrity of nations
Is like the purity
Of a precious stone
As we delve into
Ruby and sapphire
We see ourselves clearly
Letting the other shine
We realize all boundaries
Are never the separations
Of men but gate ways to love
So breathing Scottish being
We all start seeing
Our great lady love
As we are high above
Flying like a dove

When deciding our future path
Seek within our Scottish being
And you will find she holds us tight
As we live in Scottish being
Foundations built in the eternal
We float freely together

High up in the highlands
Clouds collect and thunder rumbles
As our Lady Scotland crackles
With a discontent , over head
As she seeks to reclaim
Her many precious children
Who gather in her valleys
And are spread across her lands
As she shepherds her children
Her only wish is to call them her own

Lady Scotland feels her
Indignant heart , unheard
By this masquerade
While paper thin
Politicians reduce her
To an economic equation
Like a fine cheese
She is cut up and sold
Or shared out at the
Conservative and bullingden club

Like an old husband our
Master seeks to keep us
bare foot and pregnant
Are we to remain grateful!!?
Push off England
You pompous ****
For you keep us in chains
While you harbor mass destruction
Within our waters
You curse us with disability
Insulting our ability
And stifle our potential
With your every word

Let us call upon
The spirit of Scotland
As we play bagpipes
Through our ancient valleys
And push holes through
The English , back line
Let us come in from long a hard day
With rain smashing in our face
And know why Scottish whisky
Tastes the way it does
And fill our chest
With the forgotten heart
Of Scotland , found within
Our age old mountains
Let us not underestimate
The power of unlocked
SCOTTISH PRIDE
As we regain our feet
As we no longer wish
To live under the shadows
Of a judgemental brother
But live within our own philosophy

There are many arguments
to be heard and understood
But let us please , to not
Sell our soul cheaply
To the highest bidder
As we search to live in
The adventures of a free life
Within the heart of Scotland

Weary of spirit I drift side ways
As my sails have lost all wind
In the mundaneness of my life
I repeat year by year
For I am a stuck record
Mechanically moving
Devoid of all emotion
I search for the thread
To my lost heart
In this daily grind
Of everyday routine
I find myself hypnotized
By the repetition in my life
My half hearted eyes
Blind to the treasures
That God bestows
For I demote myself
To a passenger in my life
For I am rung out of joy
And can no longer fill my flute

My mind bleached by the
Dazzlement of this world
I am left feeling empty
Of this worlds unhealthy fuel
As our souls secretly search
To burn away our reptilian claws
In the fires of fossil fuels
Like Edward scissor hands
Our hearts bleed for love
All actions made mechanical
We are the robots of our time
As the world seeks to make us
Into unconscious engines
Driven by the power of profit
Both in our minds and theirs

In the long range monotomy
Of this tiring life
We do not seek to run or hide
As we stand like giant rocks
Holding our own space
Carved by the weather of time
We remain the governor
Of our own lives
As all elements fall within us
For God holds us within his strength
As he fills us like balloons
Replacing all that
The world took from us
Like mountains we are pushed up
With the forces from within
As we now see this world
From a new height

As we descend the mountain
To meet the world
We are met by our many comrades
Our four legged friends
For these are the work horses
Of our time
Who show a tranquil dignity
Within their work
As they serenely
Embrace their own dharma
With a soft grace
That angels may envy
For they lead the way
As I sit and surrender
For I am a passenger
Who enjoys the view

In this new centered self
I relax and recoil within
My strength renewed
I learn the effortless embrace
My work ethic renewed
My open arms , feel the open hearts
Of our humble steeds
Who still the sea's
Of our ruffled minds
As I seek to return home
Dropping in to find my heart
Within my mechanical self
Enriched I feel
As I hitch hike on Gods glory

Finding our heart within our work
Can be the hardest sea to sail
But the greatest
For accomplishments sewn
In the hearts of men
Will beam in the sunlight
Of righteousness
While those thrown
And discarded on shallow dry soil
Will shrivel and die
Though I may sometimes stumble
Sometimes finding my stride
I remain on the path
Too and within my heart
In work

For I Love my life
In all its shades
As who am I to bring
Condition into life
As I push my food around my plate
Like a fussy child
For now I seek just to sing

I am smashed down
By the worlds standards
With such physical expectations
My hopeless heart sinks
So small, so small
so small, I am
As I am haunted by
the images of tender Beauty
Powerless and worthless, I feel
As I walk daily, shrinking inside
I hold my dignity tight
As this shrinking violet
Hides in her great forest
Cheeks all flushed and red
I scurry behind some foliage
Surrounded by my own dead wood

The lashing striking pain
The whips of many masters
Draw blood from my many old wounds
As I become aware of my infected self
Far to much it is for me
As I play pass the parcel
With all my friends
As youth shines its splendor,
its brightness, claiming all the sky's
I am burned by its great heat
My skin scorched
For such beauty can feel
like the furnaces of hell

For what God would curse us
With such inadequacy and shame
In this half life
For I live in a darkened room
Of many locked doors
Where I have cut my own
Arms and legs off so
That I may live in this world
As I live on silent scraps
While the world enjoys its harvest
and feasts on Gods bounty

But better it is to be the limp inadequate
That can only fail to catch
Helplessly left only to observe
As a great physical Prowess
Can be a great curse
For much seeing is lost
In the unquenchable appetite
of hungry feasting Lion's  
As there is in the glory of conquest
The soul can be long forgotten

The seeds of my shame
And inflections of inadequacy
Where burdens, never of God's will
But sewn by the devil himself
To hide the majesty of God's creation
So I relax to observe
The weeding of my gracious God
As I am relieved of each passing pain
I fall into blissful acceptance

I am smashed down
By the worlds standards
With such physical expectations
My hopeless heart sinks
So small ,So small
So small , I am
As I am haunted
By the images of tender Beauty
Powerless and worthless , I feel
As I walk daily ,shrinking inside
I hold my dignity tight
As this shrinking violet
Hides in her great forest
Cheeks all flushed and red
she scurries behind her foliage
Surrounded by her own dead wood

The lashing striking pain
The whips of many masters
Draw blood from my many old wounds
As I become aware of my infected self
To much it is for me
As I play pass the parcel
With all my friends
As youths shines its splendor
Its brightness , claiming the sky's
As I am burned by its great heat
My skin scorched
Such beauty can feel
like the furnaces of hell

For what God would curse us
With such inadequacy and shame
In this half life
For I live in a darkened room
Of many locked doors
Where i have cut my own
Arm and leg off
That I may live in this world
As I live on silent scraps
While the world harvest
And feasts on Gods bounty

But better it is to be the limp inadequate
That can only fail to catch
Helplessly left only to observe
As a great physical Prowess
Can be a great curse
For much seeing is lost
In the unquenchable appetite
Of a hungry feasting Lion
As in the glory of conquest
The soul can be forgotten

The seeds of my shame
And inflections of inadequacy
Where burdens ,never of Gods will
But sewn by the devil himself
To hide the majesty of Gods creation
So I relax to observe
The weeding of our gracious God
As I am relieved of each passing pain
For thy will be done

Godless men wearing back
sit within blistering sun.
As they carrying their sacred book
soaked in an evil not from any GOD.  
And they some how get
**** **** ****
**** for God.
As they ironically tell the
world that it is
blaspheming.

Come and join us
or be buried alive.
Yes come and join us
Let us brutalize and castrate
your daughter your child.
And give your son a gun while
we go cut of some heads.
As we rip out your heart
with blood and violence.
And ask you to spit on all
love and humanity.
As you stand within your shaking bodies
you look into the eyes of your
wife and only see terror in
her heart.
You know that you must
RUN

Thousands of you are swept
like the dirt into the sea.
Mothers and Fathers crying as
children are lost and drowning.
Someones baby washed up like
drift wood or a log.
Cut all with razor wire
climbing caged out fences.
As a heart cry's I only want a
new family home I will polish
your shoes wash all your loos.
Please they scream we are only
human
Sorry I don't think anyone
is listening.  

Westerners wake up lounging
on their sofa belly's spilling
over their trouser.
Stomachs extended inflated
from just a little to much
extra seconds.
Looking on disconnected
at those who traveled risked
their lives even walked
a thousand miles.
And some how spill out with
their lager down their cheek
thieves  ****** and
lazy freeloaders.

And those who succeed to
find a new home some how
elegantly find a dignity
in being unwanted.
And those who failed their
perilous path trust in God
has left them homeless
As they find the west
also Godless.
As we with a cool glare tell
them go back to your guns
bombs your not welcome
here.
Stone face matter of fact
immigration explained
take your children back.
As we try to through them
back like babies into a dog
or snake pit.
SHAME ON US
for this frosty reception
and cloudy perception
I hold out hope for a
better conclusion.

I am cut by the shards
of my shattered dreams
My hard heart broken by
the fist of my own ambition
Spilt milk and empty cups
All karma now has gone
For the Lord now slips away
As his every favour, now has gone
Alone now I stand in the shadows
of my shattered dreams

Lured I was by the mermaid's smile
My dreams smash on the rocks of time
Broken am I
By the crashing waves of change
All parts scattered and spread
I find myself adrift
On the ocean of Oneness

The wolves of destruction
devour all hopes and dreams
And goddess Kali drinks the blood
from my decapitated head
I feel the force of my father's fury
I stand in a field of rubble
Where a castle of faith once stood

My tears of ambition now fall
emptying the seas of conquest
That enslaved my marooned self
on the island of desire
Eyes freed from desire
see the Love in Kali's eyes
And thank the wolves
for slaying my hopes and dreams
for freedom comes to open
A door to the deeper self

To the girl that never came
I would like
You to know
I am still waiting

They told me
Something better
Around the corner
Is just waiting
But she never came

I have been waiting
By the window
Around the corner
On  the phone
And on my own
But she never came

I wish she only knew
I have been weeding
A very sacred place
For our love to grow
On a daily base

As hope ran away
Some where dark
I would rather , not say
Did she ever hear
The song of my
Humming bird heart

Now lost its voice
I wish she would
Consider me a choice
bended  knees  
I am still asking

Oh God
My friend is now helping
Dignity needs saving
Catch me God
My heart is breaking

As I am still waiting  
For the girl
That never came

Gentle friends gather
some where between
A tear and Anger
As we march like silent thunder
Into cloudy hill tops higher
To free the minds of forgotten children
While lifting mist from their future

Children burned by the fires
Of societies scorn
They are rejected and rejected
For does anyone know
When someone last said
I love you Johnny
or jenny
or James

So together we march
To mark an awareness in God

Good moods are blown
Through life saying
Trust in God
Trust in existence  
But they are as weak
As houses made of
Flaky straw
In a world full of hungry  Wolves

So me and my friends together march

For Becki and Debbie
Who's parents cancelled Christmas
On Christmas morning
Or Rachel's lost innocence

FOR I ASK GOD
   Do you even know their name
   Even know they live
  
This  shame  needs a home

For I ask anyone
If you see God
Please tell him about the children
Who live betrayed in the
Shadows of existence

In the mean time me and my friends
Will march to higher states on Snowdon
Some where between a tear and anger

Why do we not scrap
this barbaric idea
that keeps us all in fear
The price so very dear
Is it not so very clear
We must reject this
stupid idea  

Sorry it escapes me
but how does having
Nuclear weapons make
the world a safer place
Does that mean if we all
have them the world would
be a completely safe space  

Why does our search for
peace always involve
humiliating an enemy
Destroying their dignity
alienating them completely
Can we not learn a more
compassionate intelligent
social ingenuity

If you could smell evil
we would surely pong
As we breath dreaded a
threat of global destruction
Spreading our fears
like raindrops many tears
As we arrogantly court with
pain and extermination  

Let us learn that peace
is not something you
****** on an enemy.
But can only be built
on many small
steps of trust
And by dropping our
power greed blood lust  

100 Hiroshima's sleep
within a Nuclear sub
To awake a single one
would be a calamity
So lets protect all of humanity
And regain back our sanity
By rejecting this path of vanity  

Every new journey towards
hope starts with one little
brave step in trust.
So let us take that step now and
support nuclear disarmament.

Even though my wounded pride
May wish to shower its havoc
And share its discontent
Spreading battles over many dark lands
Seeking its vengeance
As the sweet taste of the enemies pain
Would serve as the greatest aspirin
As breaking the smile of my
Gloating enemy , for my failure
Would quench the hatred in my heart
Like a thousand harsh winter
For that is where I stand
In a frozen land

Dare I melt the sea's of my frozen heart
As i sit in such silent peace
Though I may incline not to enter
The harsh world of relating
Where ego's smash against my heart
Alpha's roaring over my meek self
Leaving splinters in my bleeding heart
As they trample over me
Dispel yourself
For i seek the silent blissful path
Worthy yourself greatly , you may do
But I am a weary soul
Who grows tired of daily battle
And bored of your disrespect
Come only if you rest

Rest I must in Gods heart
And seek his help
Melt my heart Oh LORD
And cushion me in this world
As God you may be my parachute
And drain my vengeance
For its toxins , poison my blood
And spill me into darkness
A warming heart brings new remorse
To my violent soul
Shining a new light on all my errors
I seek forgiveness in the Lords presence
As I seek the new

Melting sea's renew memory's
Of broken hearts
The flow of new loving essence
Caress my many forgotten parts
Like a wet kiss from lost Love
Bringing tears and joy
In the same breath
Keep Away Keep Away
For I bath in the Love
Of lost nostalgia
Though the Love of lost lovers
Had raised me
That the stars were sprinkled
And sparkled in my heart
They felled me Like the giant Red Woods
Of California
Though I lived in the shadows
Of such heights
I seek the new
As I thank all the love of all lost love
With all the grace I can humbly offer
For their heights will become
My Stepping Stones

Are we to reject a greater unity
for the sake of a superficial
sovereignty.
For does not the richness of
every need its canvas.
And every flower deserve a special
place in the garden.
As every star sits in the nights sky
belonging to a constellation.
I never hear them complaining
only gently sparkling.

Are we to reverse down a dark alley
not knowing where we are going.
Do we wish to offer a clenched fist
or are we to open our hand and heart.
Have we become so inwardly looking
that we switch of our lights close our
eyes as a room full of blind nations
continue to fight.

Are we to be influenced by papers
that serendipitously cloud the difference
between EU immigrants and Syrian refugee's.
As Rupert Murdoch and corperate power
divides and conquers.
Trillions gather of shore sit on the world
like a giant cancer and all we do is fight
with each other.
As they in circle us with their power we become
the entertainment at their coliseum.
Or do we pour love within the gaps becoming all
so much closer bringing back all our power.

Are we to live in a shrinking world where
other people's problems do not matter.
Is it time to close our eyes or time to look
in the mirror.
Out out out keep the bad guys out
as though our hands were clean
that we had never done anything wrong.
Are we we to cling to a penny pinching surface
or delve into the depths of our character looking for
a deeper treasure that truly matters.

Will not the true values of our heart not proper
when connected more deeply on the inside
and out.
By clinging to a superficial sovereignty we may
find ourselves also clinging to a wobbly mast.
As our island drifts of into a rough sea we maybe
to involved with surviving that we forget
who we truly are.

With shortness of breath
I drag and crawl lifting
my clawed and bitten
body from the filth and
slim of a murky swamp.

While nursing my infected
wounds washing away all
dirt and grim.
An eager early morning sun
bursts over a sleepy horizon.
Geese flock and fly over head
as a damp mist hugs the long
reeds.

A somber question weighs
heavily on my mind.
Do I regret ?
And I say no

Because amongst  all the filth
dirt and grim. Broken bottles,
hookers, ******* lines, *** ends
and scars in my mind.
Tired grey hairs and a  body that
aged ten years over night.

I found a love, and hearts that
shown like the sun. Pure in
intentions that asked for nothing
but gave me everything.
And a friendship that I had never
known.

When others crushed and spat
drowning the sparkle in my sun.
Turning my world black,
they all merely flooded in.

With their drum and base
that played all night and
flashing lights that were
ever so bright as festivals
are quite a sight.

So how can I possibly ever
regret, when from God
they had come
to
rescue me

With a sincerity in their hearts
they all together caught
cherished and
saved
me

Caught in the snares
of beauty
I am a willing victim

As I lie next to Tate
Naked in many ways

As I am lost in every
Curve and lock of hair

             As she proclaims
               " YOU ARE ****
                  YOU ARE **** "

I paint over my nerves
with directionless words
of work and horses

Returning  to me a bright smile
with  sparkling eyes
she climbs onto me  giggling

          And says  
           "YOU LOVE HORSES
             YOU ARE A GOOD PERSON
              AND YOU ARE **** "

Dumbfounded by her words
But i feel no need to question  
For i am wiery soul that seeks rest
So gather your lies around me
So I may shelter in your branches    

Tell me your
       Sweet lies
Take my money
  I will close my eyes

As I bury my sight like
A mole in his hole
A dark insecurity
Eyes shut like a baby mouse
Not ready for the world

But on opening my eyes
I see her unmoved
Striking eyes fixed on me
Wide open like nets
As though collecting
All my past mistakes
Grinding them into two shiny pearls
As she looks back into me            

And with a russian accent she says
              " I  NO LIE
                  I  NO LIE"
she shakes her head
                "  YOU ARE **** "
Fumbling hands reach out of my heart
Wishing to catch such words
But they are spilled
As my disbelieveing soul
Is already full with  rejection
Mine or the worlds
It has all become blurred

But I care not for my heart rests easy
As I am filled with  gratitude
Letting  my Love just flow and flow

I am honey coated
In the dawn yellow sun
As I walk softly
Through the glazing savanna
Intimately married to
My body I feel all
Her strength and power
My low center of gravity
Pushes down 2 tonnes
Of my power house weight
Almost buckles the ground
It is as though the earth
Beneath me becomes concave
As I stand on a spongy soil
As the landscape rolls up
To a brand new sun

If the rest of me forgets
Where I am going submerged
In flaky doubt my hard horn
Points the course through the
Clouds of apposing forces
As even the Gods are forced
To part the way like the red sea
As I plough through space and time
Nothing dictates to me
As I chase away darkness
And carve out doubt
Breaking spells while proceeding
All ghost will run from me
Possessed by the devil
I will DRIVE  him out
For I am the AFRICAN  EXORCIST

Careful where you step
Because I hang over
The savanna like a
Silent volcano
Run and hide if you
Ever hear the huff and
Puff of my disgruntled being
As you better get out the way
Without any delay
As I blaze new pathways
Showing you a brand new day
As I smash through obstacles
You or the world

I feel my center speaking
Opening , EXPLODING into
Inside out spaces
Multiverses are vibrating
As I ride on a wave
Of infinite forces
combusting
I am fired forward
With rocket fuel
As I reach new places
Expanding into worlds
Of high and far out spaces
Greater than I know

Hesitation and procrastination
Will be trampled on
All those blown over by life
Jump on my back
And I will stampede you
Through this world
So dare you attack
Or cover my track like weeds
With feeble words and excuses
As they strangle my future path
And my lava filled belly
Will blast them with fire
Melting and molding
My internal landscape
As I imprint my freedom

How I love you Black Rhino
You have my attention
So can you please point
Your horn in the right direction  
FORWARD AND UP
Forward and up for me
As I ride with the BLACK RHINO

I slip softly into my cave
as I gently vanish disappear

To my inside place
I explore like
outer space

Where I begin to light
the dark with a
fragile flickering candle

It is not long
before it all
becomes so very warm

As I rest in the
armchair of my heart
I start to hear
snap crackle and pop  

As I switch of the mind
releasing all that is tight
I enter the permanent night

But discover all turns to light
as the dark becomes a
permanent day

And as I tunnel into
my great mountain
a cave a distant quiet
world.

I start to feel the worlds
rains cannot touch me
and feel gold all around me.

With the world so far away
a glowing lamp rising
within me like flowers
bursts scents are spilling.  

And a hummingbird is
felt buzzing all around me
softly searching for
his sweet nectar.

How I love to return
to my sweet cave.

I am the firm solid earth
The ground i feel to walk on
But i fear many waters
Great  vast oceans
For they smash against my edges
As they seek to drag me down
And **** me in  

I hold tight while closing my eyes
For I feel the wind building
Seeking to ******* away
Turning and twisting me
Against my lost self
Blistering and attacking

I fear all fire for it
Spits and burns my skin
Breaking and pushing me apart
As it unsettles my restful self
Destroying and consuming

As my soul clings to self
Like a frightened child  
It screams for fear
Of its own life  
STAY AWAY STAY AWAY
For i seek nothing
But my own council

As my soul fears lose of self
In the many day dreams
That others bring to me
Like a ferocious dragon
Jealously guarding his
treasure laden lair
I hoard all that is
Precious in me

But I am the stubborn earth
That pushes all away
As time passes I discover
My many deep caves
That lie within my mountains
As I rest in the comfort
Of my own home

I begin to call upon
The many ocean
To rest against my side
The wind to lie upon me
And the fire to rise up in me
For in the sanctuary of my tomb
I am consumed by the richness
Of all that surrounds me

Dust is lifted from me
As I am now as much
The vanishing wind
As the Anchored heart
Blown through the air
I smash against all  my sides
And  fall as rain on mountains
carving valleys and canyons
Or I am absorbed by fire that
Presses and pushes

Slowly I begin to guide
The many external forces that shape me
With this loose and loving cooperation
I become my own  craftsman
Learning to embrace all elements
And truly let go into the world of relating
You become the artist  of
Your own face in this world

My appetite for life
And all its pain I have
Often felt has shrunk
Under all its challenge
As I have even sort to
Unconsciously share some
Of my precious pain
But that was as a young cub
Not a fully grown male Lion

But here I stand in the chaos
Of one of my fresh Kills
I have let to many voices in
Who are all these animals
Trying to devour my
My **** , my pain

ROAR !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ROAR !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Get away from my ****
For you deny me my strength
My beautiful Lionesses and Lions
Return to ferociously feed
For they are all ravished
This is my pain so keep
Your distance little ones

Please do not diminish
My power by hiding my
Truth within your sweet lies
Or guesses , guesses and guesses
Please do not insult my strength
By creating a make believe world
And do not cover me with
Scaffolding so that you
may work on me , for I am
The finished article

I do not need to be
Held up or supported
With your ropes and strings
For I am no ones puppet
I pace and growl to warn many of
Who have eye's for my **** for they
See the strength it gives me
As my pride feasts
I stand tall with a dignity

As I own my space I grow
In statcher and my wobbly
legs feel like pillars of strength
My soft pads meet the earth
With a deep silence and alertness
As I stand strongly because
My feet always touch the earth
As the power of my leap is
Governed not only by the strength
Of my spirit but also with the
Firmness it meets the earth
For my power explodes when
The strength of my soul hits the earth
So I growl at all avoidance
And hunger for the truth

My Lions seem so alive
As they ravage and feast
While I stand and shine brightly
In my yellow sandy coat
Which glistens in the sun
As streaks of pure Gold
Start flashing and flashing
As the worlds projections
Reflect and bounce of me
Dare they look into my eyes
And see the ownership of my being

Learning to devour pain in life
Is not easy , but we need not
Look any further than
THE LION'S FRESH ****
And some where in their fury
We shall find our freedom
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I am the queen of the sea
And when you swim with me
Hightoned is your awareness
As my super senses spill over
And danger catapults you
Into higher states
As I hunger for life
With a ferocious appetite
As my jaws propel me forward
As I bit into life I clamp
Myself into this precious world
loosing teeth as I bit
With a detailed precision
But the power of my hunger
Replaces tooth after tooth
Feeding desire I swim freely

All flee from me as they
Build higher and higher
Towers far above
But no one escapes me
As I will always swim faster
For I am the Queen of death
They only wish to meet me
In a cozy bed space ,a sleepy place
Unaware that they are even alive
But they miss the marriage
Of life and death
As I am both black and white
And offer Life and death
As I am the GREAT WHITE

My eyes black holes of nothingness
Swallow the world of life
So dare you stare into me
Eyes , a bottomless abyss
As I am the black sphinx
So I hope you have done
Your homework like
Jesus and budha before you
As I am the ultimate test
The perfect mirror
And most honest voice
As only the biggest souls can
Look and find the bottom of me
As they transcend all
Because in their death
I offer them life

Great are those who stare at me
Greater are those who look and took
For death is my very nature
As my being will feed  
On  your ego with
Every day you stay near
Often hunting alone as the
World see's  me as a devil
But I truly only follow my nature
For if i am not supposed
To be this way
Then why did GOD make me
The world tries to shoulder me
With expectation
But I swiftly pass through
As I have no shoulders
For I am totally free
As I glide and float
Never hurried but always fast
As I Go for it and Go for it
No shackles on me
I am just free

No where is the marriage
And spiraling dance
between Life and death
Seen so clearly than in the
Black eye of the GREAT WHITE

This is the highland spring
Let us in the mountains sing
As a deep Scottish blues
Glides and glues
Dispelling scattered fears
seeking to keep us weak  
There is no need to seek
Let all Scottish clans
All join their hands
Claiming all  their lands
Thrown away by old elite
Such history
If we could only delete

As we honor the gallant  
Men with freedom
Boiling and brimming
In their limitless hearts
Greater  , than any  life
As they spill over their freedom  
As  Scotland here  baths
In their unforgettable souls
As they still  resonate
In the trickles of
Scottish streams
So let us all hear
As silent mountains nestle
In deep blue skies
As they merrily enchant

Let all nations slip away
From tricky triangle
And clumsy squares
Where dishonest intention
Live on elevated corners
As we carry them on our back
While in their deeds they feed
The beast of paranoia
Slitting love affairs like wood
I wish this was understood
As their sharp corners
break straight lines
Where intimacies once lived  
And smash large circles
Like breaking glasses      

But let us live in precious circles
Where all nations float freely
Like lilies in a pond

The loving , work horse
Strong heart , over flow
Loving the earth so deeply
Loving the earth so completely
He is driven daily
To plow his Love
furrow after furrow
Day after day
As he pushes heart into soil
In his daily toil
Generously carried softly
A surrendered humility

Our conflicting desires
Causing internal fires
Minds torn apart
Twisted and contorted
But like wild horses
We set all free
Flying high like a bird
Relaxing , letting be
As all will inspire
So just watch
This explosive aspire

A horses purity
A crystal clear clarity
As desires from
Their master drift
Blissfully , shine brightly
As connections run deeply
And he loves his
Fathers earth to
As he share his masters grief
For all his poor harvests
So ears placed on his crown
The horse listens intently
For directions from above
And ridden horses feel
For nudges in the gut
As all horses enjoy
The blissful atmosphere
Created when their fathers
Wishes are fulfilled
As they both melt
Into a gentle repour

Boundlessly trusting
Giving themselves
Softening , striding
Physically carrying
Emotionally supporting
Integrity and honesty
As many trumpets play
Flashing lights dance a ray
As accidents happen
They listen and listen
Reestablishing connections
As they are always
TRUSTING

People and horses
Boxed in by life
Enclosed in tight arena's
Great pressures to jump
Deep urges to escape
But all jumping horses know
Freedom is not a
Horizontal choice
An option to run out
But a vertical belief
To jump what ever is front
As freedom is found
In the expression
Of unlimited self

The horse beauty
Is in its ability
To give generously
Surrender and listen
As he finds freedom
By working with and
Not Against higher forces

Living freely in this world
My vulnerability, feels so lost
As it seeks the skies to escape all
Perched high away and hiding
My heart forsaken
For my vulnerability
Has left

The little bird has flown

My retreating heart lives behind
Many layers of frozen ice
The warm waters of my heart
Have all frozen over

Come back, come back little bird

A teardrop falls
For I see the loss of potential
In this frozen pond
Where waters should be warm
My heart should sing
Great rich jungles, it should bring

My pride wounded by this world
I stare into my murky depths
My standing in this world falling
As my legs are taken
By the jaws of a giant beast

Far away a bird twitches

My stomach twists and turns
Absorbed I am into the belly
Of a great giant crocodile
I begin to feel my vulnerability
In these dangerous warm acidic waters
As I merge into a crocodile
And high above a bird leaves his perch
As the ice layers break
With the force of my tail

New eyes see the self importance in people
Of this earth, with all their arrogance
I will bring you back to earth
For I am the last living dinosaur
Born from a time when T.rex reigned
And even the birds had teeth
For I still live in waters
Where Piranha's seek to
Frenzy on living flesh
And I am to be scared of you

I warn all of those who wish to disturb
My open and most precious heart
That rests in silence over my pond
For your flesh will quiver
With the sound of my ancient growl
And your eyes will panic
With the sight of my jaw

A quiet bird flutters closer

Bring your bitterness and all your sourness
For I am hungry and love rotten meat
And your disregard feeds my fury
Circle my pond
Where my heart rests softly
With rich and green waters
Bursting and growing in love
For I am not scared to feel

And I will lounge and grab
As a tonne of me, slaps itself
Bang, ******* this earth
For I am here to feel it
And not escape it
But you will be blind
And lost in my depths
I will turn you over and
Your arrogance will feed me
As I grow stronger
You will be ripped limb from limb  

A little bird comes closer

My heart free from noise
A silence nestles in me
And all innocence is seen
Beautiful souls float freely
Butterflies dance and play
And my beautiful vulnerability
returns in sweet song
And rests softly in my jaw

A strange paradox becomes so very clear
With a little bird we hold so dear

Living freely in this world
My vulnerability, feels so lost
As it seeks the skies to escape all
Perched high away and hiding
My heart forsaken
For her vulnerability
Has left her

The little bird has flown

My warm retreating heart lives behind
Many layers of frozen ice
A teardrop falls
As I see the loss potential
Where here my heart should sing
Great jungles it should bring

Come back, come back little bird

I stare into my murky depths
My legs are taken by giant jaws
I twist and turn as he swallows me whole
My standing in the world taken
I merge with this crocodile

Far away a bird twitches

I look out into the outside world
And see the disregard and arrogance
Which fuels my anger like oil on a fire
As they disturb the peace on my pond
May their flesh quiver
With my ancient growl

high above a bird leaves her perch

I am the last living dinosaur
Born from a time when, T.rex ruled
And birds with teeth reigned overhead
And I still live in waters
Where Piranhas seek to
Frenzy on living flesh
Am I to be scared of you

A quiet bird flutters closer

Bring me your contempt
For I am hungry and love rotten meat
And your disregard feeds my fury
so please circle my pond
Where my heart rests softly
With rich and green waters
Bursting and growing in love

A little bird tweets overhead

I will lounge and grab
And you will be blind
And lost in my depths
I will turn you over and
Your arrogance will feed me
Yummy yummy
I slip away from the beast

A little bird perches on his head
Still mistrusting him
For he carries a triumphant smile
As though injected with poison
The little bird says
You know I love you crocodile
But I am still not safe

Disgruntled he returns to his depths
On the inner side of the pond
Faraway he finds me again
Staring into dark waters
As though it could speak
Many times has he watched
Arrogant mammals reach and fall
Coming back consumed with
Pain, rejection and failure
Both looking and hiding from the truth

A bird tweets I LOVE YOU

With both a ferocity and compassion
He pulls me down as a tonne of flesh
Slaps itself ******* this earth
I twist and turn as I struggle
With my own truth
As he rips my pride off the bone
Be aware of my tongue for it is
Possessed by a crocodile's lashing tail

I really Love you the bird cries

The beast feasts on my bitter truth
And sour reality, I am not
Strong enough to take
And spits out the sweet lies
That keep me from myself
As he pulls me down into my own depths
Such a beautiful beast
For he feels no need to evolve
Perfect as I am he says
As it fills me with his power
To be exactly who I am
How I love this Crocodile

A bird approaches

My heart free from noise
Inside and out
A silence nestles in me
And all innocence is seen
Beautiful souls float freely
Butterflies dance and play
As all is gentle around me
And especially in me

And my beautiful vulnerability
Now returns in sweet song
As the bird rests softly in my jaw
A strange paradox becomes so very clear
With a little bird we hold so dear