You're a cold walk in December when it's snowing and I forgot my coat.
When I'm shaking and shivering running into Walgreens because their heater is on.

You're a brisk wind and a fast paced argument that happens on a Sunday afternoon in church.
You cursed in front of your god for me not believing your beliefs.

You're a Saturday afternoon breakfast because I woke up to late and hungover.
When the food got cold because I couldn't find the asprin and broke down in tears on my kitchen floor.

See you're the reason I fell in love and the reason I drink to much of the hard stuff instead of tea.
But you don't understand that yet, which is why you still watch cartoons Saturday morning, and I cry alone in bed.

You're a cold walk in  December  when it's snowing....

I remember looking across the Golden Gate Bridge thinking... This was it! We could never be who we used to be.

Wind in our hair as we drove fast on the interstate... Just you laughing at me and me smiling at you.

What joy to be young and dumb and in love with each other and life.

It was a cool California night, we drank wine under the moonlight and roamed the city with brown paper bags in our hands.

You arms around my shoulders your lips against my cheek... I couldn't help but think this was it! We could never be who we used to be.

There's something about the city at night with its lights and the thought that danger could be around any corner.

But this was exactly where we ought to be... Just you laughing at me and me smiling at you.

You came at me like quicksand and all I could think was after this there wouldn't be a single piece left of me if this ended wrong.

You were supposed to stay away ( no matter how much I wanted you). You were supposed to be strong enough to let me go... Because we both knew I wasn't.

You came back so suddenly I didn't have time to comprehend what was happening. I can't even stay mad at you when I want to!

You are a ******* disease.
You are the reason I'm so dysfunctional.
You are the love of my life
& for that I'll always forgive you even when I shouldn't.

I like the idea... Of falling in love strangers who don't know me.

Who don't know what I've been trough or my favorite book. Who don't know how I like my coffee or what my favorite food is.

I like the idea...of being someone to somebody new.

I don't want you to know my ***** secrets yet, or my lack of showering every day. I don't want you to know I hate not blow drying my hair after a shower or how I hate walking around naked.

I like the idea... Of new beginning With new people.

I want you to get to know me for me. I want you to ask my favorite color or why I prefer white chocolate instead of dark. I want you to ask me why I take too many pictures or cry for no reason sometimes.

I like the idea of falling in love with someone who doesn't know me at all.

I thought about the weather a lot today and how my moods keep changing with the seasons.

Summer came quickly, too hot to handle. Lit me up to make me sweat and watch me fall exhausted alone and sad.

Autumn came without a warning with a chilly breeze and bright colors warning me of the coming storm I knew I couldn't stop.

Winter was faster though, ice cold, chilled me to the bone. Made me stronger though! Walked through blizzards to make it home.

Spring... Well there was never a real spring. We didn't have pastels and romance. We didn't have soft winds and warm nights... We skipped spring this year and went straight back to summer to die.

Once I stayed up watching the darkness hearing water all around me.  Once I watched the stars fade to darkness hearing the silence fall around me.

Once I loved someone with all my heart I let my walls fall around me. Once he let me go & it hurt so bad I built walls around me.

Once I told my best friend she was weak and I let our friendship fall apart around me. Once I decided to tell my parents they didn't care & I let their love fall around me.

Once I stopped caring, that day came sooner than I thought, and I let me tear crash and burn around me...