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"fluctuations" poems
“Yorkshire! Yorkshire!” I hear the EDL scream, as if somehow the county, relates to their regime? Trying to push on others their far right views, and tainting Yorkshire with their taboos cos Yorkshire to me, is whatever the **** I want it to be, I do love a bit of local pride... maybe to revel in the comfort it provides, and even though stereotypes say we're tight, as well as stubborn, argumentative (they're prolly right), But I'd rather that, than be uptight, like a stereotypical southerner might I recently read a quote from Stuart Maconie, “England has a bottom half, but there isn't a south, in the same way there's a north” The North in the south means desolation, A cultural wasteland with deserted stations, a place built on violent, aggressive foundations, With mid summer Arctic temperature fluctuations, Nothing that comes close to a nation.... But that's not what I see, To be from the north means good fish and chips, with tomato sauce and vinegar, it's glory on the lips, I see people willing to lend a hand, A honest chat about the weather as you stand at a bus stop that you never planned, It doesn't matter whether it's a cob, bun, bap, barm or roll, Or that the north was ****** over by the outsourcing of coal, Or your opinion that we're all just sat on the dole, drinking tea out of a ***** bowl. We should still all have a similar goal, To have a good time, and not hurt a soul Sometimes I do like to revel in the divide, but I'll always welcome people from the other side, Acceptance is not sin, and if you let it, it generally ends up with a win : win What's Yorkshire to you? I haven't got a clue... but come sit down so we can have a chat and a brew! And hopefully we'll both learn something we never knew.
0
Oct 8, 2014
Oct 8, 2014 at 12:33 PM UTC
The Divide
“Yorkshire! Yorkshire!” I hear the EDL scream, as if somehow the county, relates to their regime? Trying to push on others their far right views, and tainting Yorkshire with their taboos cos Yorkshire to me, is whatever the **** I want it to be, I do love a bit of local pride... maybe to revel in the comfort it provides, and even though stereotypes say we're tight, as well as stubborn, argumentative (they're prolly right), But I'd rather that, than be uptight, like a stereotypical southerner might I recently read a quote from Stuart Maconie, “England has a bottom half, but there isn't a south, in the same way there's a north” The North in the south means desolation, A cultural wasteland with deserted stations, a place built on violent, aggressive foundations, With mid summer Arctic temperature fluctuations, Nothing that comes close to a nation.... But that's not what I see, To be from the north means good fish and chips, with tomato sauce and vinegar, it's glory on the lips, I see people willing to lend a hand, A honest chat about the weather as you stand at a bus stop that you never planned, It doesn't matter whether it's a cob, bun, bap, barm or roll, Or that the north was ****** over by the outsourcing of coal, Or your opinion that we're all just sat on the dole, drinking tea out of a ***** bowl. We should still all have a similar goal, To have a good time, and not hurt a soul Sometimes I do like to revel in the divide, but I'll always welcome people from the other side, Acceptance is not sin, and if you let it, it generally ends up with a win : win What's Yorkshire to you? I haven't got a clue... but come sit down so we can have a chat and a brew! And hopefully we'll both learn something we never knew.
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37
Strewn about Pushed and pulled Kneaded and formed Torn between fluctuations Waves of highs and lows Guided by incessant duality Indecisive self esteem is a certainty Inevitable and constant is change Enjoy your main character moment It always goes just as sudden as it came God complex with a hint of self loathing We dance on the scales of our emotions Just because the pain is carried well Doesnt mean it isn't heavy, the weight of it is always felt Survival is sometimes met with guilt Youre invincible to everyone except yourself Stay balanced and level Integrity above all else Do whats right when noones looking Or be tortured by the secrets you can never tell
0
Feb 21, 2025
Feb 21, 2025 at 11:08 PM UTC
In Secret
clinton rebukes israel over east jerusalem homes obama nasa plans catastrophic say moon astronauts alaska wolves **** woman's teacher out jogging ireland frees 3 cartoonist plot suspects sarkozy and brown attack u.s. over protectionism pope benedict's former diocese rehoused abuser priest chile puts quake damage at $30bn winnie denies interview criticizing nelson mandela climate change makes birds shrink in north america dr rowan williams is honored for work on russia weymouth ridgeway skeletons scandinavian vikings live bangladesh v england michael schumacher pledges to raise game in bahrain can the u.s. vice-president broker middle east peace? sarkozy's party faces socialist drubbing remote indian state set for development new york dust victims split on 9/11 deal german tells of childhood abuse by catholic priest a step closer to the american dream? lehman: how $50bn was buried in london ba strike union announces dates in march china's oil demand increase astonishing says iea china warns google to comply with censorship laws net clash for web police projects hsbc admits huge swiss bank data theft phil spector ****** conviction appealed sir david jason to voice cbbc animation climate change 'makes birds shrink' in north america thalidomide effect mystery solved blood pressure fluctuations warning sign for stroke winnie denies interview criticizing nelson mandela mogadishu residents told to leave somali capital same-sex couples marry in mexico city by mistake i clicked on wrong button and lost everything
0
Mar 12, 2010
Mar 12, 2010 at 6:59 PM UTC
**** blue jesus
clinton rebukes israel over east jerusalem homes obama nasa plans catastrophic say moon astronauts alaska wolves **** woman's teacher out jogging ireland frees 3 cartoonist plot suspects sarkozy and brown attack u.s. over protectionism pope benedict's former diocese rehoused abuser priest chile puts quake damage at $30bn winnie denies interview criticizing nelson mandela climate change makes birds shrink in north america dr rowan williams is honored for work on russia weymouth ridgeway skeletons scandinavian vikings live bangladesh v england michael schumacher pledges to raise game in bahrain can the u.s. vice-president broker middle east peace? sarkozy's party faces socialist drubbing remote indian state set for development new york dust victims split on 9/11 deal german tells of childhood abuse by catholic priest a step closer to the american dream? lehman: how $50bn was buried in london ba strike union announces dates in march china's oil demand increase astonishing says iea china warns google to comply with censorship laws net clash for web police projects hsbc admits huge swiss bank data theft phil spector ****** conviction appealed sir david jason to voice cbbc animation climate change 'makes birds shrink' in north america thalidomide effect mystery solved blood pressure fluctuations warning sign for stroke winnie denies interview criticizing nelson mandela mogadishu residents told to leave somali capital same-sex couples marry in mexico city by mistake i clicked on wrong button and lost everything
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1
evening Maria and Mr. Riner are sitting on my bed tied up like garlands, against the wall the words stew inside and I can't seem to pour them out but we three fools, sit and scribble regardless staring blankly at the drooling clock (persistent, in our memories). the whitewashed cinderblocks are testament to the number of walls the quantity of clocks this series of chairs and if we close out eyes we expect to wake up in heaven but it's just the same old hell. she says, keep writing (if you feel inclined) and slides her back into mine but I've got no more letters in these fists (so I'll lie and think for a bit). she says, I've never been a 'she' before... morning my coat sits in a bundle near the door I've been trying to find a way to hang it but I'm having mixed results, in fact all this month I've been trying to make attachments to these white, white, cinder block walls with all manner of adhesives. but these nightly sessions have been ******* with the humidity and every morning something new is on the floor. all I can do is put them back up again. try and be a little more constant with these climate fluctuations. try and sleep a little more, sweat a little less.
0
Nov 9, 2012
Nov 9, 2012 at 5:43 PM UTC
sweat less
the alcoholic’s eyes are the least searching, there’s a fixed point in them, they’re not darting as you might expect with the loss of the virgin’s carousel of frenzy: up & down up & down. the alcoholic’s eyes are fixed on a point that makes the world less transfixed in its parabolic fluctuations, that steady eye we’re all expected to have when a hallucinogenic curtain is thrown over our eyes, when the young moralise the old and the old can’t teach the young - hence the alcoholic’s eye steady darting into commotion he least expected - otherwise known as the world. ‘but the lions are caged!’ the alcoholic bemoans, 'now i’ll have to put up with economic tourists panicky over eating their own in the race of who gets richer first spawning a thousand gypsies correcting political correctness to a hijab **** ****** at for conversation!'
0
Oct 8, 2015
Oct 8, 2015 at 10:39 AM UTC
alcoholic's eyesight
I live my life in extremes Polar opposites attract in the center of my soul And for some reason, living on opposite ends Seems to be a fashion trend I am not the "I made out with every girl in my college sorority So now I'm bisexual" type of queer Not to out-and-proud vomiting rainbows type of bisexuality I am the bisexuality that gets erased The eighth grade girl who, when she told her first boyfriend she was queer, He told her she was over dramatic and crazy. I am the bisexuality that gets oppressed Because I am confined to the walls of a shrinking closet Or is it expanding? I have lost my sense of left or right Up or down Yes or no. I am not your manic pixie dream girl type of bipolar Not the girl who needs saving from her mental illness Not drowning. I am the bipolar disorder that becomes overwhelming The depression that chains me to my bed in the morning The hypomania that seems euphoric, but is never happy The grey area, the lone horizon, the empty space in the middle Seems like something I drive through over the speed limit Every day of my life. While my extremes do not look good on your favorite actress They look beautiful on me. Not an outfit I can strip down when it goes out of style Not a channel I can change when it is not appealing anymore But I will learn to love my fluctuations My mood pendulum My love pendulum I am swinging from state to state But at least I am flying Instead of falling.
0
Dec 13, 2015
Dec 13, 2015 at 11:59 PM UTC
Extreme Fetish
this is a poem about happiness. this is also a poem about how great life is, see? here's a metaphor comparing nature to the faultless form of a pedastalized lover, here's a description of the effect of changes in air pressure and localized temperature fluctuations on physical matter in a given area. here's a bland truism that anybody can relate to. here's a couple rhyming stanzas about the ethereal shifting of connecting threads which cause all life to dance upon the cosmic stage like food poisoned marionettes. here's an ode to the wrinkles of my ******** and the bits of fuzz that occasionally find their home in my ***** here's a sonette to the drop outs doing better than me here's a dirge for the businessman that hangs himself and a jubilee for his widow who earns nothing off his death because he left his entire estate to his catamite. I'm writing a symphony in color, notes of fermenting wood dogshit and coffin dust. the violas swoop and drone the piccolos trill fast enough to excise your gastrointestinal system the barotone sax wheezes and the timpani drum rumbles (the flutes sit motionless because **** flutes) the pianists fingers are bleeding hes banging with stumps now his face contorted in ecstatic glee as if the face of god has parted the clouds just to scrape his gums clean with his dietous **** and lo faint is the whisper which climbs and slithers between the false, bash upon life with both hands. here is life here is death let me show your life let me breathe your wretching like squandered like roots in the soil, paint your everlasting cave drawing in the face of your kitchen and dance around a fire let the embers lick your heels til pagan viciousness overtakes your quivering form. gasp it in
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Jun 20, 2014
Jun 20, 2014 at 2:47 AM UTC
don't mind baphomet
this is a poem about happiness. this is also a poem about how great life is, see? here's a metaphor comparing nature to the faultless form of a pedastalized lover, here's a description of the effect of changes in air pressure and localized temperature fluctuations on physical matter in a given area. here's a bland truism that anybody can relate to. here's a couple rhyming stanzas about the ethereal shifting of connecting threads which cause all life to dance upon the cosmic stage like food poisoned marionettes. here's an ode to the wrinkles of my ******** and the bits of fuzz that occasionally find their home in my ***** here's a sonette to the drop outs doing better than me here's a dirge for the businessman that hangs himself and a jubilee for his widow who earns nothing off his death because he left his entire estate to his catamite. I'm writing a symphony in color, notes of fermenting wood dogshit and coffin dust. the violas swoop and drone the piccolos trill fast enough to excise your gastrointestinal system the barotone sax wheezes and the timpani drum rumbles (the flutes sit motionless because **** flutes) the pianists fingers are bleeding hes banging with stumps now his face contorted in ecstatic glee as if the face of god has parted the clouds just to scrape his gums clean with his dietous **** and lo faint is the whisper which climbs and slithers between the false, bash upon life with both hands. here is life here is death let me show your life let me breathe your wretching like squandered like roots in the soil, paint your everlasting cave drawing in the face of your kitchen and dance around a fire let the embers lick your heels til pagan viciousness overtakes your quivering form. gasp it in
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61
these faces on the wall that have no eyes, the young children with blood escaping from their hands as they pick up a mound of the Earth and throw at genuflected roses. these battered men in parks searching for light and my woman is no longer with me. it’s all vaudeville: this obnoxious working of continuance, these redundant flutings, these unprecedented fluctuations. opening the yellow gates to death as the automobile churns the last of its exhausted snarl. we are children peering through glass cases as death laughs at his hopeless clientele, sad, desolate progenies in working-classes, in parks, in factories, somewhere along Mendiola, or just treading the waist-high hellish froths of Dapitan, there’s always death in the nooks of the quiet and from where birds stir in sidereal circles, death with his hands resting on the cage, chases us back to our homes. death the changing of the gatekeeper. death the telling machine. death the dentist. death my next door neighbor. death, this boorish broken-winged Maya twitching in front of my dog’s shadow shot out of the Sun’s shameful recoil. death, my loud and loutish muse, death the truant, death, the copious fog somewhere in Kennon Rd. death, in my hands through darkness and light, death through troves of enigma, death through undisputed clearings, death the long line of red beads in EDSA, death the gates of Plaridel, it’s the moon following you, trailing your measure, i hold my woman’s used shirt, pick up her photographs and there’s no tender movement left but the still-seeking lion prowling the jungles of my heart, seared by lovelorn undoing. through the bottom of the sky and the unchanging roof-beam, the weathervane ceases to a sojourn and the wind is trapped in a place where we cannot utter any word between the gnashing of our teeth – through the wasted years, through the sleeping in and out of homes filled with beatings, to cathedrals swollen with tribulations, and to the vineyards wrung out of wine, my lover, walking through fire, sound silence.
0
Jan 2, 2016
Jan 2, 2016 at 9:20 PM UTC
Anthem
these faces on the wall that have no eyes, the young children with blood escaping from their hands as they pick up a mound of the Earth and throw at genuflected roses. these battered men in parks searching for light and my woman is no longer with me. it’s all vaudeville: this obnoxious working of continuance, these redundant flutings, these unprecedented fluctuations. opening the yellow gates to death as the automobile churns the last of its exhausted snarl. we are children peering through glass cases as death laughs at his hopeless clientele, sad, desolate progenies in working-classes, in parks, in factories, somewhere along Mendiola, or just treading the waist-high hellish froths of Dapitan, there’s always death in the nooks of the quiet and from where birds stir in sidereal circles, death with his hands resting on the cage, chases us back to our homes. death the changing of the gatekeeper. death the telling machine. death the dentist. death my next door neighbor. death, this boorish broken-winged Maya twitching in front of my dog’s shadow shot out of the Sun’s shameful recoil. death, my loud and loutish muse, death the truant, death, the copious fog somewhere in Kennon Rd. death, in my hands through darkness and light, death through troves of enigma, death through undisputed clearings, death the long line of red beads in EDSA, death the gates of Plaridel, it’s the moon following you, trailing your measure, i hold my woman’s used shirt, pick up her photographs and there’s no tender movement left but the still-seeking lion prowling the jungles of my heart, seared by lovelorn undoing. through the bottom of the sky and the unchanging roof-beam, the weathervane ceases to a sojourn and the wind is trapped in a place where we cannot utter any word between the gnashing of our teeth – through the wasted years, through the sleeping in and out of homes filled with beatings, to cathedrals swollen with tribulations, and to the vineyards wrung out of wine, my lover, walking through fire, sound silence.
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43
Delusions of grandeur abound. Sophistication and advancement are sold to the masses and deceptive merchandise is purchased with a commodity which is trivialised in the name of relativism: our soul. Fixed false beliefs are embraced in the quest for enlightenment, despite the lunacy of such an approach. Analysis of the snowflake may be captivating; but fluctuations of environmental equilibrium reduce its beauty to a tiny trickle of moisture. There is truly nothing new under the power of the Sun. So, pursue anthropological evolution and astrally project into mystical horizons at your almighty will. But I appeal to the universe: bring back the medieval celebrations of lunar amazement. However, let us not forget that the trials of Salem are a perpetuating characteristic of our triumphant modernity. I want to take you Home.
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Dec 31, 2013
Dec 31, 2013 at 3:21 PM UTC
Draconian Modernity
Sweet liars and their sugar coated lies… Root from their heart and branch out in the skies… Their innocent souls and deceptive eyes… Their polished shoes and branded ties… In the beginning they seek your attention… The next desire is your affection… By recital of their past and rejection… Either from them or from other direction… “Don’t sympathies sweetheart, I am a strong man… Okay”… “My heart comes free with this ring and bouquet”… “Say yes, my love, we’ll plan a holiday”… “Let’s go shopping for your lingerie”… The candles are lit and the dinner is served… The charm and chivalry is observed… His scent and accent leaves you unnerved… He is definitely the prince you thought you deserved… Ah! And you fall in the trap and love as well… Dreaming of him and his tempting propel… You talk of him and his stories you tell… Of the vamps he dated and your own love spell … He has your trust and you are happy high… His kisses and touch you can’t deny… “He loves me so much” you amplify… You light his nights like a firefly… Now when you feel the bygones are supplanted… The road gets a little slanted… When you are more often taken for granted… His fluctuations show the doldrums are planted… You inspect the change and the causes aligned… And come across the love texts enshrined… You feel shattered and maligned… The way you are portrayed and opined… You demotion as ex is celebrated with a raised toast… With his new flame and he playing host… You embrace your strength with care utmost… His vows and love , haunting you like ghosts… You want to cry till you paralyze… Blaming thyself for this jeopardize… The arduous task to analyze, summarize and self sterilize… From these sweet liars and their sugar coated lies… ~Kathaa Kirti
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Jan 8, 2015
Jan 8, 2015 at 4:25 AM UTC
Sweet Liars
Sweet liars and their sugar coated lies… Root from their heart and branch out in the skies… Their innocent souls and deceptive eyes… Their polished shoes and branded ties… In the beginning they seek your attention… The next desire is your affection… By recital of their past and rejection… Either from them or from other direction… “Don’t sympathies sweetheart, I am a strong man… Okay”… “My heart comes free with this ring and bouquet”… “Say yes, my love, we’ll plan a holiday”… “Let’s go shopping for your lingerie”… The candles are lit and the dinner is served… The charm and chivalry is observed… His scent and accent leaves you unnerved… He is definitely the prince you thought you deserved… Ah! And you fall in the trap and love as well… Dreaming of him and his tempting propel… You talk of him and his stories you tell… Of the vamps he dated and your own love spell … He has your trust and you are happy high… His kisses and touch you can’t deny… “He loves me so much” you amplify… You light his nights like a firefly… Now when you feel the bygones are supplanted… The road gets a little slanted… When you are more often taken for granted… His fluctuations show the doldrums are planted… You inspect the change and the causes aligned… And come across the love texts enshrined… You feel shattered and maligned… The way you are portrayed and opined… You demotion as ex is celebrated with a raised toast… With his new flame and he playing host… You embrace your strength with care utmost… His vows and love , haunting you like ghosts… You want to cry till you paralyze… Blaming thyself for this jeopardize… The arduous task to analyze, summarize and self sterilize… From these sweet liars and their sugar coated lies… ~Kathaa Kirti
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41
the wrong atmospherics of transmission move in uninvestigated chaotic archives red and pink turbulent storms swarm across deep space frequencies in imaginative currents of pulsars that are translated into phases each represented in diverse conflicting modes of expression in obsessive grooves of consciousness cut up components of recycled narratives audibly fixating on vibrations that sound across the universe in diffused spirals of manic fluctuations converting archaic symbols into equivalents of dust surfaces that oxidise in intermittent epochs and deposit a rediscovered earth an expansive transferable construction of accidental providence that allows for expression in artificially generated realities hallucinated images that float across the consciousness of the cosmos producing visions that punctuate rational thought become preoccupied with the conception of interplanetary transpeciation counting the chronological diversity of those that occupy the black, blank vacuum of space
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Aug 4, 2013
Aug 4, 2013 at 7:54 PM UTC
We are not alone...there is somebody out there...in space everyone can hear you scream...
The Saturday night crowd, all here to see Dave Van Ronk, sit huddled in the fashion of Antwerp diamond cutters, sipping cinnamon/marshmallow coffee at the tables. Caffe Lena is Saratoga's happening place in the 60's and we're here to forget the war and civil strife in the ghettos. Sister Mary Katherine, sans frock, is the warmup act, but no one really gives her any mind, as she struggles to seat herself upon the stool intended for the six-foot plus Van Ronk. Joan Baez prepare to eat your heart out! Without so much as introduction, she breaks into a high soprano Just Like Tom Thumb's Blues. Heads pivot like synchronized swimmers toward the stage. Her silken voice emits notes blinking into reality from quantum fluctuations in space/time. Every quivering high-C grafts the audience together. She's spinning veils of sound, the like of which our ears are unfamiliar. The quavers in her throat match the tremors in my coffee. In the back of the cafe a drunken Van Ronk passes out.
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Feb 23, 2012
Feb 23, 2012 at 8:49 PM UTC
One of Sixteen Vestal Virgins
Significance decreased as your speech began to reek with pretentious hypocrisy revealing conspicuous shortcomings Importunately making conclusions based upon illusions Spouting lines to save but delirium is all you gave As if I were seeking your confirmation, salvation, or blessings I would've asked your opinion if I valued your progression and prosperities or wondered into a church if I sought duplicitous appease This unrequited love you deal is meretricious and full of disease You sell a lie until it's spent then devour what is left of one's esteem You depend on the humiliation and degradation of another to accommodate the hostilities you experience from others Passing off insurmountable grief to save yourself from your own realities I hope one day you find peace and revelation Before someone else is enraptured by your false persona falling victim to your belittlement and fluctuations
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Jan 11, 2014
Jan 11, 2014 at 11:46 PM UTC
Misrepresentation
I yearned for peace, To silence the chaos of my mind. Craved a quiet solace Sought to close my heart Until Fate wove Our bonded twine. Two wayward souls On separate paths— “Coincidentally” align. This perfect pairing, Our missing piece A testament to Divine Design. We navigate this expanse Unknown For which only the boldest Are inclined, Of life’s tumultuous spectrum— Erratic fluctuations, vacillating From arduous to Sublime. It takes an acute endurance, Coupled with two spirits In their prime To overcome insurmountable Obstacles Which so often bend The Strongest Of Stalwart Spines. And yet our love Transcends all trials And to you Alone, I resign… To the man who mends My heart I am yours, and you Are Mine. I vow to cherish you Until my last breath, Until the fabric of Time Unwinds. To my Saving Grace, My Singular Proclivity— My Everlasting Valentine.
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Feb 17, 2022
Feb 17, 2022 at 3:44 AM UTC
Everlasting Valentine
Awakened by the summons Of the moon, he wanders. His eyes, vaguely responsive To light fluctuations; and He often weeps when dishes are washed. He calls my daughter, ‘David’ or Simply barks at her. At midday he routinely gathers All family photos, stacks in towers. He interchanges tasks of the dinner table And the bathroom, incognizant. The cat seeks him out and They seem to find comfort together. We keep mittens on his hands; For, without them, he’s prone to Bore holes to the bone. When outside, he’ll rush toward the maple; Embrace it, like Mom, and cry. On Sunday mornings we have come to expect: A laundry basket prepared, by him, Brimming with loose crackers, milk, cheese, Broken eggs and cat litter. He creates knotted chains with his shirts; Laughs, hysterically at the sound of the vacuum; Sings, ‘In The Garden’, whenever it rains. While, for years now, I have prayed That this is solely dormancy; And someday, he will be full again. I solemnly wish that I had no memories of him; This would make my love for him less complicated.
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Dec 5, 2010
Dec 5, 2010 at 9:14 AM UTC
Hollow Man
There should appear some respite, despite the fact, I am a Nyctophile as I too love my collapsing sight I too flicker in the bright. Like an earner without his earning The dark existence, by the sphere that lurks, partially satiated 'See-Saw' a fodder for human poets The other aspect, totally denied. Skin is imbalanced which showers mixed colors Why not an equilibrium? Vampires licking honeyed sanity The sane too, join the party. But, if he complies, they wouldn't If she complies, they wouldn't Fluctuations are eminent There should appear some respite, despite the fact, I am a dust stained file as I too love my collapsing might I too flicker in the bright.
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May 3, 2017
May 3, 2017 at 3:34 AM UTC
Nyctophile
Night shifts into jet black city escapes if it's not insanity, we don't have an answer at stake. this product of you and me was never an accident. love at its peak signaling and S.O.S. you've bought me in a surface. we don't now yet. analog fluctuations I wanted you and I cant forget. Sanctions we break, with metal palms we punch. limitations act as walls our thirst  keeps me quenched. My passion, your fire. will get us above the wires ambiguous insights to the past. Passion and fire, you ignite.
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Jul 1, 2013
Jul 1, 2013 at 8:15 AM UTC
Cold Electric, hallucinogenic
holdover from the air cools bitter awash of dark and a turning horizon without centre. where i entered an empty frame across distance and skin like smoke. ive been having nightmares of cosmic terror a sublime loss of control like paper tearing in the chaotic drifts of broken eddies and other everyday things an inward open mirror a sunlit line wavering to heat disintegration dispersal erosion and death. ive been reading uncanny fluctuations in the sign of things in a power too great and sparse to comprehend overwhelmed by haunting finitude as time veers into collision and the fleeting panic of yesterdays blood. i find myself shaking at the thought of contact the electromagnetic law of repulsion built into the fabric of my flesh eyes turned away like a promise all language from dead stars. dragged along these orbits my skin trembles and i am hateful. faces blur in passageways half-lit rooms smudge across the surface of my memory until i see nothing but the colour of what was tightening the cords of my ribs stumbling inflexion. in the precession of traffic light blurs through my sleeve and i realise i was invisible all along and that i did this to myself and that nobody can help me and that i did this to myself and that i will retreat further and further and further because if it hurts to be abandoned it hurts more to be approached and misunderstood. the masks the words the acts the plays and beneath it all fear cruel mounting hopeless wretched fear eyes turning fingers running over and over until they break the lines of my face a ******* i turn the clocks upside down. i take the batteries out of all my electronic devices. i break the locks on my door. only then does morning come.
0
Feb 7, 2018
Feb 7, 2018 at 10:51 AM UTC
faltering
holdover from the air cools bitter awash of dark and a turning horizon without centre. where i entered an empty frame across distance and skin like smoke. ive been having nightmares of cosmic terror a sublime loss of control like paper tearing in the chaotic drifts of broken eddies and other everyday things an inward open mirror a sunlit line wavering to heat disintegration dispersal erosion and death. ive been reading uncanny fluctuations in the sign of things in a power too great and sparse to comprehend overwhelmed by haunting finitude as time veers into collision and the fleeting panic of yesterdays blood. i find myself shaking at the thought of contact the electromagnetic law of repulsion built into the fabric of my flesh eyes turned away like a promise all language from dead stars. dragged along these orbits my skin trembles and i am hateful. faces blur in passageways half-lit rooms smudge across the surface of my memory until i see nothing but the colour of what was tightening the cords of my ribs stumbling inflexion. in the precession of traffic light blurs through my sleeve and i realise i was invisible all along and that i did this to myself and that nobody can help me and that i did this to myself and that i will retreat further and further and further because if it hurts to be abandoned it hurts more to be approached and misunderstood. the masks the words the acts the plays and beneath it all fear cruel mounting hopeless wretched fear eyes turning fingers running over and over until they break the lines of my face a ******* i turn the clocks upside down. i take the batteries out of all my electronic devices. i break the locks on my door. only then does morning come.
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1
It is a replicable dialectic that swirls in my mind like a spiral of cigarette smoke covering fluctuations of diffused expanses of transferable hallucinated images relying on an artificial artificiality to generate a reality one that amplifies a calisthenics of maximized reduction in the blank vacuum of space allows those sophistication’s where there is a scrutiny of exclusions that may perhaps betray the concepts of others those correlatives of our own creative interirority where a mind may repeal a transgression for it is breakfast in the time of the Wizard Pig
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Apr 21, 2013
Apr 21, 2013 at 5:24 AM UTC
Breakfast in the time of the Wizard Pig
another day a few more hours till this time comes again. look out, for i will make the same mistakes. but these errors are not random they are natural fluctuations.
0
Dec 26, 2014
Dec 26, 2014 at 4:09 AM UTC
random error
Quarks, photons, gluons: sub-atomic particles: Quantum fluctuations That wink in and out of existence. Where do they come from? Where do they go? There must be somewhere else. Somewhere beyond our space and time. Outside our multiverse, Our Realm. A parallel dimension next to ours. Heaven? Who knows? We ourselves are made of particles: Many a water molecule, blinking in and out. So in effect we are dead As often as alive. But am I God? Are We God (assuming You are Real)? Yet we have little power. We can’t be God. Maybe We are The One Mind, Dreaming all together. Dream Creations in our very own Dreams. Within our virtual, mortal shells. We are caught in an infinite, Vibrating energy stream, Perceiving an illusory Virtual World, Living the Dream together indeed: The One Mind. Paul Butters
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Jan 27, 2015
Jan 27, 2015 at 6:49 AM UTC
The One Mind
sunlight reflected in broken jagged fragments on the wings of an aeroplane flying north deep in the valley of organs and warm trickling blood. she haunts my thoughts as a distant terror a threat to the happiness weaved between weathered fingers she'll take him away take away with the fluctuations of her voice cutting raw wounds in the back of my throat. //calmly wait passion resonates with a sticky wet presence clinging wet clothes to curves. he sees my thighs with appraising eyes. you must belong to me:: to my sacred heart beats-- no thoughts of california and the wreckage she should bring
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Jul 14, 2013
Jul 14, 2013 at 11:27 PM UTC
jealousy isn't a kind companion
"Mental Illness" Do those words excite you? Look at me I am a whirlpool of melancholy I am a drain I am filled with mania I am a pulse An endless flame Of what **perfect madness** I am every kind of fluctuation imaginable "Mental Illness" But I am so intimately rearranged Put together in the most unique And beautiful And miserable of ways "Mental Illness" Ha, I am so much more than that.
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Feb 3, 2014
Feb 3, 2014 at 9:03 PM UTC
Fluctuations In The Form Of Feelings
Tick tock tick tock. "When will my breath stop?" Apparently not appropriate conversation to make at my family gathering. The chicken is delightful. Would you give me the recipe? (murmurs of agreement around table) "I wasn't kidding. I avoid pools, yoga and beautiful people that take my breath away so I don't have to deal with slight fluctuations in my oxygen intake!" The table was set up perfectly by the kids, don't you think? Granted they forgot the wine glasses! (adults chuckle) "I can't help but imagine those pillowcases in our chests that expand occasionally, as if rotating fans face them. It's an obsession of mine!" Oh I think Johnny's about to fall asleep! Is there a guest bed room I can let him rest in? (assistance follows) "Why won't you listen! When I take off my T-shirts, I count down and gulp the air before pulling the fabrics off, out of fear of being found dead, half-naked due to suffocation." Oh Laurie I really shouldn't have dessert, I'm trying to watch my weight, but let me help you bring it out? (chattering of women on the way to the kitchen) "Don't you know that I carry both an oxygen tank and an assortment of plants and trees wherever I go. I insert the tubes or the vines into my nose so that even when I'm gone my lungs may never stop rising." (speaker dies the next day in car crash)
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Mar 4, 2018
Mar 4, 2018 at 11:39 AM UTC
I must sound like a midwife/partner