Unworthy-
31/January/2021
1.22Am

That day when you asked if you could tell me a secret
I was so excited,
But to be honest I freaked out.
I was so unworthy of that weight.
My simple heart cannot hold such pressure.
The weight you are carrying.
The knowledge that you've earned.
I felt so unworthy of the words that would spill out of your lips.
That day I felt something different.
I thought I knew knowledge,
I thought I knew how to take life as easily as a floating feather.
I thought I knew how to take my problems and put it down with my fists.
I thought I knew what is love.
But that day your eyes told me a different story.
Your eyes showed me a story of a thousand nights.
A forest of thousand lives.
A Library with thousand books.
A universe of thousand skies.

Your eyes asked for trust that day
It asked for a chamber with a lost key,
Locked away and cannot be found for eternity.

But I am just a human.
Unworthy of the treasury you wanted to give.
Illiterate to the feelings you wanted to share.
And unworthy of your trust.

So what of those who aren't sought
Or the ones afflicted with eternal solitude
Where do our hearts go or rather hide
We are the refugees of this so called euphoria
An enigma so potent known as love

We are those not wanted by it
The unchosen and not desired
It chases us away like we're rats
Forcing us to scurry for cover
When all we want is to be fed

We've been shut out of it's presence
Like we are unworthy vagabonds
Sleeping on an empty cold floor
Crying ourselves into slumber
Only to be orphaned again tomorrow

I'm tired.
Tired of convincing myself that it was them,
and not me.
Tired of trying to understand their uninterest,
in me.
I'm tired.
Tired of lying to myself,
that one day ill find the one that will,
love me.

Just don't think about those people
Who have left you with no choice
But to think the reason of your aloneness.

Just don't hover around,
Those,
Making you feel unworthy,
Shut their door,
And don't worry dear,
It isn't ego,
It's self-respect,
Self-help,
Self esteem and
Self-love.

Just don't be with those,
Bragging about their victory,
By belittling your tiny beginnings,
And don't worry dear,
It isn't that you aren't worthy,
But the person is so unworthy
To witness your
Victory by stepping tiny it's.

your eyes and their laughter lines,
   your hair and your familiar frame,
      your bare feet and clean teeth,
         the warmth from our shared time.
the miracles made into memories,
   the wonders into wishes,
      the triumphs into tragedies,
         your patience with my pretending.
untouched i longed to be untethered,
   but too long in the mire to change.
      how long will you wait
         for my hands to be your hands?
a song in a dream and awake we're apart,
   my fear my fault and my freedom my fear.
      you may not want me anymore,
         for i am ragged.

Desire to see
How you'd be
Makin my world flee
Dont know how to feel
Cuz lovin u is my need
That i cant stop but feed
Eyes turning with speed
Whenever u proceed
Yet your always accompanied
Afflicting to admit but envied
Makin my heart bleed
For they may mislead
For i am pitied
If only youd forseen
Decree as my queen
By all means an equisite scene
Not a soul step intervene
Abundant love since sixteen
Take you to cuisine
For all is unseen
Have all ur questions
I'd answer with combustion
You may ask am i the right one?
Different from everyone?
Worthy or is there no one?
But this aint done
So listen
You maybe be taken
But i have ur heart won
Give you all for love you more than all
Haunting yet sacrifice my self
in any circumstances given
Always and forever there for u for certain
Stand out as there mistakin
They dare forsaken
Have audacity to Heartbreakin my queen
be ****** heartachein
My undertakin bringin them shakin
Cuz none will stop my wrath for godsakin
I am thier nightmare satan
Deeply awakin like a hawk
I am not all talk
But at least not like them to stalk
Have u in a shock cuz i am destined to rock
Have ur love lock full of stock that none can knock
Dont care if i am mocked
Waiting for all ticks on clock
No need if you let me have u spoken
Take all my action
Never be forgotten
For ill give all my attention
Be your best decision


https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=xuCXbqTW5aY

Uneven
Without substance, void of faith
Unresolved
Seeking facts among the fiction
Untapped
For the price seems too steep
Unfavored
Privilege lost that was never had
This heart is blackstone, hollow within
Day to day, sinking further down
Useless
Fake a smile of sincerity,
For all the world's a stage, and we are but merely actors
Or whatever Shakespeare meant.
Reveal yourself, masked man
Uncover the fear you bring
In a cloak of anxiety and dread
For these lay dormant yet dominant within this vessel
From this side of the mirror, it is all you will ever see

Yo la quiero, la amo
Y sé que siente lo mismo por mí
Pero hay veces que dudo de ese amor
No porque no lo dice lo suficiente
No porque no lo enseñe todos los días
Pero porque no creo en mi misma
No veo lo que usted ve
No escucho lo que usted escucha
Estoy toda rota
En pedazos
Destrozada
En necesidad de milagros
No me veo capaz de hacer algo bien
Una buena para nada
Una imbécil
Cerrada y callada
Soy incapaz de
Hacer
Hablar
Escuchar
Pelear
Soñar