Verse 1
Hello toilet, my old friend
I've got to go now once again
I've been waiting for a great while
This time I'm going the ex-tra mile
With a force that few have ever known,
Sheer will alone,
I'm taking...the ****...enormous

Verse 2
In truth it feels more than I can take
I could pass out-and yes there's no mistake
That this straining-it is as such
Upon a mountain where lightning struck
Where I felt the challenge
May be well beyond my strength
What it might take
Attempting...the ****...enormous

Verse 3
And in the end I can now feel
This force of nature makes me reel
Pushing a boulder of such great size
Pushing a stone so big-one can't deny
Making a log-giving it your all-one may survive
Yes-in all my life
As this was...the ****...enormous

Verse 4
By my word-I feel-that this is it
Upon this toilet throne I sit
An overwhelming explosion from inside
With no place in my mind left to hide
As this was-unreal-yes, you can take my word,
The gigantic...****...enormous

Verse 5
And my goal it now seems in sight
I give it all with all my might
In a strange vision this very moment
As this an unreal bowel movement
And soon I feel:
Like the clear shaking in the earth
That as making n' breaking waves
I'm stunned and dazed
From taking...the ****...enormous

Been a long while since I was back in the city
  (at work)
Must be around two and a half years
The Old haunts... their all haunted now
Pubs I used to visit...frequent and frequently
  get a little bit drunk/tipsy in
I wonder am I still in there drinking still
I feel like if I went in I might see
  myself sitting in some corner there...

My favourite restaurant too where I used to
  eat
Every Friday afternoon with my    
  burger  black coffee and chips
Sitting in the window looking out at the
  world going by, the people passing
Glad to have made it through another week
Glad to have survived, glad to still be alive
I almost expect to see myself sitting there
  now.....

So many have gone, so many have left...
  retired, some even passed away
So many new younger faces around the place
I wonder "Am I too, on my way out"
Wherever I go all I hear are echoes of other
  times
See faces that remind me of someone else
It's like Life is moving relentlessly along
But I've been left behind some place.

I seen a face in the street that looked
  like myself when I was young
I just stood there and watched him disappear
  into the crowd
There's such an unreal ghostly feeling about
  the place
It's so strange coming back after being at
  home alone for so long.

Working from home on my computer and taking phone calls from the public for a living
My office had me rostered to do the phones in the morning from 9.30 onwards
So I set my alarm clock for 10 to 9 to give me enough time to get up and get things ready,
But that night, for some reason, that night I just could not get to sleep
Wasn't that I was worried about anything, it's just sometimes I find it hard to sleep
Well, I tossed and I turned, I tried everything..., I counted sheep,  tried to hypnotize myself,
Finally I got up and made myself a large herbal tea sleep drink, used two tea bags double strength
Even took a tablet afterwards and even then... I still couldn't sleep
Finally... finally I do drop off but it's like I've only been sleeping like for two hours
And then the **** alarm clock goes off
And now it's morning and I really am tired and it's ****** freezing in my room
And I'm lovely and warm and snug in my bed,
So I say to my alarm clock "Aww give me another 5 minutes will ya!"
(And I still don't know how to use the snooze function on my alarm clock)
So I close my eyes and of course, in no time I've dropped off again
And I get this dream...
I dream I'm walking along this path
And there's these three big guys walking in front of me
It's like a father in the middle and his two big strapping sons either side of him,
But their walking kinda slow whereas I'm walking fast
So I pass them out and I say "hello" just as I'm passing, just to be friendly
Then as I'm walking ahead of them I can hear them making these snide little comments about me behind my back
'Well that's not very nice' I think to myself
Then the next thing I know, suddenly there's this big arm around my throat strangling me
And I hear them saying "Let's **** this ******!"
And I'm thinking "What!!! What the ****! these feckers their... their trying to **** me, what am I going to do!!!
Then I think, "This is serious! My life is on the line here, It's **** or be killed, you gotta do something, you gotta fight back
(Now I ain't no fighter)"
So I'm there wriggling around, punching and kicking wildly, trying desperately to break free, fighting for my life apparently
But what becomes evident pretty quickly is that these guys they don't appear to be very good fighters either
'Cos suddenly I find myself on top of the father guy
And I've got both my hands around his throat and I'm choking, I'm strangling him now
But of course, I've never killed anyone before
So I don't know what the hell I'm doing
I'm there thinking, how do you choke...how do you strangle someone
I wonder am I doing this right, Ugh! It's not very nice, it's pretty gruesome, his face is going all red, he doesn't look too happy, does he ?
And then I'm also wondering where's them other two feckers gone?"
Then I think "I don't like this, maybe there's a better way... maybe I should... maybe I should kick him in the head instead, that might be quicker, that might be better,
But then I think "Well that's not very nice either, kicking someone in the head, I wouldn't like someone kicking me in the head..."
Anyway suddenly then I wake up out of all this craziness
And I look at my clock and it's like 9.25
"****!!!", I say, "I'm supposed to be on the phones in 5 minutes!!!
So I get up in my pyjamas, rush to my computer room, hurriedly put in all the plugs and switch all the switches on
I know it's gonna take at least 7 or 8 minutes before the broadband/ WiFi comes on
So I'm never gonna make 9.30
I switch on my computer and my work phone
And put my pants on while I'm waiting for the WiFi
When it comes on I gotta log in and put in the passwords and then open up all the programs
So in all it's about 9.45 before I'm all set to go
But then of course my phone rings rather ominously and it's my Boss on the other end of the line and he doesn't sound very pleased
"Are you not on the phones!" he says, "the Phone Manager just rang me and said there's no one from our Unit manning the phones, you were rostered to be on the phones this morning"
So I say to him, "Look!!! They were trying to **** me Man, there was three of them in it
It was touch and go there for awhile,
I mean what could I do, it was **** or be killed, I had to fight 'em!"
"What are you talking about?", asks my Boss totally confused
"Nightmares man!! I was having a nightmare,  They were trying to **** me so I had to try and **** them back, What was I gonna do
I don't normally **** someone this early in the morning"
(Then I added) "Lucky I don't have a partner or I'd be up for ******".

Funny thing was the experience of fighting for my life in the dream
It seemed to carry me through the whole morning, even the day
I strangely didn't give a hoot about the phone calls coming in and what they might be asking me
The job it just seemed completely unreal compared to the experience I'd just had fighting for my life in the dream
And y'know it was good... so good to find that I was still alive... and back here again in the world.

You see,
The thing
About love
Like
Daphne's and Simon's
And love
Like
Anthony's and Kate's
Is that
It is a love
So beautiful
So heart wrenching
But it is a love
That is only found
in the spectacles of
Great performers and
Electric artists
It is a love
That exists solely
In the world of
Cinematography and
In the pages of
A fine book
Only brought to life
By the our very own
Human nature
Our very own
Human desire
To want
To feel
To need and
To experience more
Just more...

-fir.m

My body and soul are just connected
to this world we called reality!
This can't be the truth!
To me it is still unclear!
Questions inside my head are ringing the bells and answers needed!
Like why i see hidden things
that i only can see?
Humans, buildings, ghosts, giants and dragons
Orks, trolls and elves or even the dwarves of khazad-dum
Angels and devils...
Wherever i go! i see what is real tied with what is supposed to be unreal!
Are they real?
I can't touch or sense it! But for sure my ears can hear, my eyes can see!
But it is nothing fearful!
I feel i belong to
I got used to