Who of you know
love such as this?
Such love that lives
in lying aloof on long nights
in waves of worry,
weary of losing
love such as this,
that can cause such loathing
from joy to joyless.

In knowing,
in not knowing
and in tides of enchantment,
Love such as this
tears and tears up in our eyes.
Such love that is blinding
or fragile or lies,
lies misunderstood;
this love envious
and fried.

My head,
that used to dream of darkness and the bad,
now only dreams of you.

I wake up,
a headache rises in the depths of my brain.
I seek the warmth of the person I still long to hold.

I wish you were here.

Eyes unclosed, restless thoughts.
Here today, yet gone tomorrow.
Brain so crumbled, thoroughly longing.
Unwanted, and feel no belonging.


Crisp cool air, traveling tears.
Unknowingly facing all of my fears.
Wrapped up in a woolen coat,
gentle silence, fogged up throat.

Thoughts over flood in my mind. It's like someone is stirring around my brain like a homemade stew. It never stops twirling, it never stops thinking. Thoughts are being replayed. My eyes become blurry and heavy, I struggle to keep them open, but my mind won't let me sleep. Another restless night, kept up by the sound of my loud and obnoxious thoughts.

The wind has been asking for you;
missing you with a chill,
crying for you with a howl.

Constellations joined to draw a face;
I once unraveled every night.

Your face that I recite
its lines and curves;
what makes it laugh,
and what makes it cry.

The moon stood showing off its charms;
trying to imitate the infatuating you.

Cotton clouds softly,
and with grace;
crafted your name,
and engraved it in a night sky
with the blushing moonlight
that once cuddled us
in a world of love and war.

I shiver, I shake,
I rattle, I wake.

From across the room I stare at the bar,
Wondering how the hell I ever got this far.

I don't know what to do, I don't know what to say,
Everything around me seems to be in the way.

I wish I could just curl up into a ball,
Going through my mind just to erase it all.

I cry, I break,
I smile, I ache.

I'm lying to myself, for that I cannot deny,
You ask me questions for which I can give no alibi.

I've done it before, and I can do it again,
But this time, I am more afraid of your reign.

Please help me dear soul, for you're all I have left,
I hate this feeling of despair and bereft.

Free me from, this life of illusion,
I am still lost on the path of confusion.

I'm scared, I'm hurt
I hide, I avert.

I don't know how long this can go on,
Before you know I am completely gone.

lavender bruises pool beneath his silvery eyes
as reminders of being struck by sleepless nights
he hides beneath hooded view
and speaks unwavering truth
he spares no words for the sake of your tears
before thrusting a rusted foil into your heart

I watch the ceiling change from black to grey to a pale yellow as the morning comes
I've barely slept I can't close my eyes
She sleeps soundly to my left
My baby dozing on my right
Her boyfriend is as restless as I
Awake
He ***** me with his eyes
She stirs, he says "I love you" but is staring at me
She drowsely kisses his cheek, he bites my wrist
Thud thud thud in my veins
The pulsing in his lust
I can only close my eyes and pray the beast finds rest soon
They are always hungry those sleeping beasts

The cup cried coffee tears,
Spilling over behind pale lips,
Pouring its soul down the throat
Of my sleepless addict.

Tick And tock
Like a metronome
My head keeps tapping as I stay awake
My mom snores, I can hear her growling through the walls,
As my imagination begins to creak and groan
Please sleep, stay in,  don't go wandering on your own.
My head would like to roam
In dream land once again,
But you've gone out for the night it seems
Like a Fairweather friend.

I wish mr. Sandman would stay for awhile, but it seems as though that isn't happening.
I'd be thankful for a nightmare because I haven't slept all week
Oh wait I don't think I wanna sleep while someone's slashing