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MT Jun 2018
She said to me, “I feel like I’ve lost you.” because lately, I haven’t been there, I’m just fading away.
It’s like I went off the road that leads to nowhere, but I’m being fooled, thinking that one day I can reach ‘nowhere’ even though I’m already here.
You’ve lost me in the Jungle of Fear… Fear that I won’t get out of the Jungle so I hide away in a tree, never having the courage to leave.
Because I don’t want to be a memory that you think about in vain
I don’t want to fall into the box of your old heartbreaks and hurt
I don’t want you to fear trust in me, I don't want to cause you pain, I don’t want to be to blame when things are never the same.
You’ve changed. I’ve changed, but I am still stuck in this tree.
Waiting for you to set me free, but we are green people, we can’t just cut the tree down.
There was never a way down, but there was a way up.
You seem to fear the tree because there is not a safe way down and you climbed the tree before and was disappointed.
Will you be disappointed again or will we make it to the end?
Would it be better if I get out of the tree? Then can we be free?
Will you help me down to the ground?
Or let me fall?
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Elizabeth Jun 2018
The only thing that woke me up this morning was the meow of my kitten who wanted to be let in. He wanted to enter my safe space where my feelings and thoughts were pinned to my stark walls. I wanted my walls to be white. Like a blank canvas. I wanted a reason to wake up in the morning. I wanted to paint my thoughts each day. My bed felt like quicksand. I was being forced to stay beneath my sheets by an imaginary pull that I felt was so real. From my bedroom window, I can see the sunset reminding me of nights in our hammock ******* to our favorite tree. The tree drooped in an odd but beautiful way, and it was fascinating. I can also see the sunrise that on early Sunday mornings motivated me to roll out of bed, that was many times ago. The only reason I get out of bed some mornings is that I have high hopes that one day we’ll meet again at the farmers market just down the street. You'll bump into me and realize what we once had was special. You'll realize our love was as sweet as an August peach.
lerato Jun 2018
What happens when the price of beauty
Is suffering
What is left
When often I'm too willing to pay

What happens when looking in the mirror and what looks back at me
Is never satisfying
What is left
When I give and give and grow empty

It won't come easy
But it will come
Elizabeth Jun 2018
I went home that day, and I wrote about the boy in the green hoodie. I thought a lot about him, but I couldn't wrap my mind around what exactly it was that I liked about him. It could have been the way he danced at midnight in my mind. Dancing around the moon painting pictures of my thoughts. It could have been the way he made me feel when I had no feelings at all. No emotions to untangle, none at all. I think it was the thought of the memories we would create, the ones I could go home to tell mother about. The thing is though I never figured it out. I never knew of any other boys like the one in the green hoodie but, I never once believed it is true that I’d find someone new that was just like you.
To the boy in the green hoodie, I like you alot.
Elizabeth Jun 2018
And I know it hurts the most when you think about him at 4 am, you’re gasping for air trying not to make a sound, the crying is loud.

You can’t be loud or they will hear. I hope you find a love even better than him, a love that’ll make your depression disappear.

But if you can’t find the love, don’t go searching just let it come to you. Let love flow in like a waterfall on the edge of a desert shore. Please love, you will find it, just stay a bit longer
Kelly O'Toole Jun 2018
Like a thorn in the side twists, turns, shifts, thugs at my pride, who am I and why?
Forget to be, forget to try. Sigh, deny and try, oh try, to find out who am I?

Struggle to reach. Struggle to come to grip with reality. You see all these expectations get laid on me, I cant seem to find my feet.

Even in finding my feet, defeat. Defeating my mind and steeped and bleeding, I'm blind and beat.
I'm beating the blinds, the street, it limits the finds and eats, it eats at my mind.

But rise to my feet, I will. Beat my way through, I do. The passing days, they may get all hazy. But I got a vision, I do.

Clear as unmuddied water, that vision peaks and from the merky pool hope leaks. Not made that of odour which reeks, rather perfume which speaks to those bold, brave, not weak.
Who on top of a mountain sits and seeks and stands on the ocean before they may sink and know their song well before they dare speak.

Hope keeps us hooked. Pain gives us drive. For that, I will swallow my pride. My dignity beat, battered and bruised. But my reputation in tact.
My strenght unmatched. Unmask myself I will. Through this treacherous journey, I shall grace salvation, to find my inner will.

And with journey abound to destination unknown leaving that hope, strenght and will for events which have thrown light into the tunnel. Illuminating the stone which sits on the temple of freedom and soul, spirit, freewill, autonomy, suddenly realisation that still ...
Still I am me.
A poem wrote in collaboration with my good friend about the journey to one finding their true identity.
Aa Harvey Jun 2018
There’s something out there


There’s something out there, that I can’t find,
Or even knew I’d left behind.
There’s something out there, I can’t see,
Or ever knew had looked at me.


There’s something out there, for you and I,
So please don’t push this boy away.
There’s something out there, for you and I,
But what it is we just can’t say.
There’s something out there, before our eyes,
But we cannot see for our eyes are blind.


There’s something out there, there’s something out there,
There’s something out there, for us to find.
There’s something out there, there’s something out there,
There’s something out there, but we’re still blind.


There’s something right here, I wished to show you,
There’s something right here, I wished you to see.
There’s something right here, I wished I’d told you,
Open your eyes and see if you like the look of me.


There’s something out there, there’s something out there,
There’s something out there, for each of us.
There’s something out there, there’s something out there,
There’s something out there, if we are able to trust.


(C)2013 Aa Harvey. All Rights Reserved.
Aa Harvey Jun 2018
A lifelong search for love


I have spent a lifetime searching for love;
The only thing I found was a love that was false.
I need another chance to show I am good enough;
I am tired of false love disguised as lust.


I will keep searching for her,
Because she is my destination.
The only one who can save me;
The only one who can take me to Heaven.


I love, love; I need her touch,
But if her love is temporary it will never be enough.
I have done all I could to be the one to give her love;
But she didn’t want it, she didn’t earn it, so she is now gone.


Onto the next search for the next lover in line.
Who knows?  Maybe this time I will find Ms. Right.
If I am lucky in love I could find what I am looking for;
But unfortunately I know this search is long and hard
And it will not happen overnight.


(C)2016 Aa Harvey. All Rights Reserved.
mindmatter Jun 2018
don’t let me leave
don’t let me walk away
because I want to stay
my heart belongs to you

my mouth will shut
my mind will try to forget
I feel they want me dead
with you I have life to live

I tie myself away
I lock the door behind me
I throw away the key
only where you can find it

I only trust your love
I wonder if you will follow
this dark cloud of sorrow
to hold me tight again

the demons will fight
they won’t let go of my hand
they believe me as ******
until your light blinds the room

no one would face them
no one cared to sacrifice
showing me a paradise
that grows behind the clouds

now there’s your silhouette
that I witness in my dreams
that quiets my screams
singing my spirit to rest

when my eyes flutter open
now there’s your smile
inviting me to stay awhile
reminding me my paradise
is one I shall create
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