I don't know how to start this conversation.
But i have to say all of this at once.
I may have to take breaks because im crying.
But ive been writing this for weeks trying.
But i want you to know no matter what i will always be here as your best friend as your person.
Now what im about to say maybe kinda shocking.
But its how i feel.
The only way i know how to put it is
"i love you. "
I love that you are best friend.
I love that i can run to you any time.
I can be my true crackhead, annoying, dumb self. I love that you have this cute obsession with blankets, they have pockets as you would say.
I love the way you take a **** hit.
How i can see the muscles in your neck when you do it.
I love that you always twirl your hair when im driving in my car or when you are bored.
i love your passion and drive when you truley want something.
I love you.
Now i know you that you already know that.
But im in love with you.
Every part of you.
Your crazy side, your talented side, your funny side, your high side and your low side.
You're the only person i really feel like talking to. The only person i really want to spend time with. You make me laugh like nobody else.
I can speak my mind too you no matter how random and stupid it is.
But you're the only person i would look for in a crowded room.
The only person i see is you.
You could do the smallest thing and it melts my heart.
The way you smilies while looking at a dog, or when you start pouring your heart out in a song. Or when you have to spend 15 minutes perhaping the bed before you can even think about going to bed.
I am chasing other people and trying to distract myself from the attraction to you and the fact that you are so deeply love with my other best friend.
And im happy that you are in love him. I couldn't choose a better person.
I will never ever put you in the position where you have to choice.
Ever.
I will not ever try to pull anything.
I will never put you in the place where you cheat.
I have to much respect to you as my best friend and to dylan.
I know that this is not a mutual feeling.
But i needed to tell you.
By allowing myself to tell you how i really feel this will allow me to move on from the feelings. They will fade unless they are acted apon.
And i will never act on them them unless that's where we are.
But i will still be your best friend.
In the near future I may get sad sometimes but it will pass.
I don't want to loose you or can really stand too.
The speech i must have with my best friend tomorrow in order for me to be able to sleep at night
