Look at me;
See the results of dissipated love turned to agony.
Look deeply;
At the pain of every blow inflicted intensely.
See me;
See the suffering that has ravaged my life and emptied the contents of my soul.
Pierce through my walls;
For your eyes only can hold this degenerating mold.

Hear me;
Hear my soul cry out from the rubble that me enthrones.
Listen;
To the sounds of crying as my dying spirit mourns.
Come closely;
And hear my whispering sighs as one who has relinquished - defeat,
Attend to me;
See that I am a love sick soul.

Touch me;
Feel the beating of my heart in dubious harmony.
Feel me;
and touch my pain with your heart as my heart pounds for yours only.
Come near me;
Know that my warmth is gone and my body a corpse
Pinch me;
For a dream would be mercy ; the pain it would stop.

See my scars;
As I see your eyes and my life growing dim in its beauty.
Hear my scars;
As my heart hears yours and knows no other than thee.
Touch my scars;
And feel the result of our rapture.
Know I am scared;
Only by your love – for your love alone could break me.

I'd like to think I am something specail. That i have some hidden talent, too shy and unpolished to crack the surface.
I'd like to think I just ignore my skills. Almost like my subconscious mind knows that the world could not handle such a powerful force as I at my peek. I think I tell myself these things...
So that I feel okay with knowing that I do not know.
For trying could mean failure. For failure, well, that will mean the serects I am feeling, the hidden talents I tell only to myself....could be just that...only to myself. I could be nothing.
I could be ******.
A *******.
With no talent or skill or common sense.
But...in this why...I am a ******* with a quite hope.
And that's enough for now.

I felt like I shot myself that night,
When I blamed life for all of my problems.
I felt like I hung myself with the tough rope that dawn,
When I blamed the other for making me feel such strong emotions.
I felt like I choked myself on water,
Filling my lungs with it that day
I stared at Death in the eyes and he could only muster a raw cackle.
I do this to myself.

Hope.
With ugly, battering wings -
Fritters away its feathers in its cage.

It is the cage that encases my entrails.
It perches on my bones,
And its sweet tweets echo within

The nothing that is my body.
No, I won't be convinced by you today, little bird.
As if things will ever get any better.

Hope.
With its sharp, red beak.
Pecks away at me -

Until there's no lies to be said,
And no one to hear them.
No one at all.

No I don't want to speak over lunch
Or coffee
Or dinner for that matter.
These words are too much to span
One meal
To span one drink
One bite,
Too heavy to mesh with
The comfort of food.
You never asked if I wanted to just
Hang one night and discuss these things.
And that's where they all go wrong;

I don't want your pity
I want your empathy
Come back to me
When you can share my energy
I don't want to claw at my scars
Only to be looked at as if I'm still
In my infancy
I want to conserve my energy
I'm human,
We can only store so much will
And pain

Let my breath not be wasted
When the time comes,
For if I choose to speak
I speak eye to eye
Entity to entity
And if my judgement of your gaze is wrong -
In that time of supposed synergy -
Know that there is no return for your
Place with me.