Never had any regrets since your last cigarette
Never a mistake that drink wouldn’t help you forget
You were ‘fun’ and you were ‘tough’ when the fuzz arrested you
The drugs well they were drugs and they did what they do

Just puff and you take and knock all back
And you huff and you joke your life way off track
It’s all about tomorrow for you; and what it can do for you
Instead of putting down childish things and seeing what you can do for you.


Now it’s bright out and all colours break the dread
You can hear and taste the screams and rows and the tears that ever came
New life hits you hard and the old feels haunts your head
Being sober and so burned only lets you know you’re nothing but ashamed

No amount of bodies would stop the haunting in your bed
It was still **** cold and still **** dark and you still can’t forget
You’re not allowed that way out too many so called tears that would be shed
So now you don’t do that? But the sky’s still blue and your bloods still red

Have another drink and heave it up and get too thin
Smoking chops up the life you want to cut in the rut that you’re in
You say you ain’t a drunk you just like to ***** for a while
Doing a-dult things don’t make you less of a child

Now it’s bright out and all colours breaks your head
You can hear and taste the screams and rows and the tears that ever came
You find comfort in the dark and fear this new light instead
Being sober and so burned only lets you know you’re nothing but ashamed

Now it’s bright out and all colours refuse to fade
Show how you love all the love these people have for you
It’s easier to imagine how it could be back in the shade
Trust they rely on you, stick it through.

But don't be a mug they don’t need you, so keep your face out the dirt
Stay sober stay quit even though it all gets through and sometimes all falls out.
Be alive and happy and hurt, instead of dead and numb, dumb and hurt.
Stick it through, stop being you.
Stick it out.

it's lonely at the top
i see it in my mind
i take it it's the same for you
so i won't waste your time

take me to the top
then take me down a step
your ones and onlys come and go
i'll make you half a trap

i want to be your 'something'
possession or a guest
you'll sometimes have your ones
i'll be your second best

i gave my last piece
i have no words
can't give no promises
can't bring a smile to your face any more

i'm done but not ready
i'm spent for no return
i'm finished with no rest
i'm empty but can't be filled again

In response to: Please Don't Put Down Your Pen

You may live by drinking the words,
But I thrive on writing the words.
Perhaps "Please Don't Put Down Your Pen" was written in response to my works, but more than likely, it wasn't.
I live off of the written word.
It is my bread and my wine, my world away from the world.
But I have put down my pen.
Returned it to its rightful place,
The navy blue, leather coated, velvet sleeping place of my works.

I have put down my pen.
My pen has been put down.
Euthanized it.
Comatose in its leather casket.

Tongue cracked, bleeding lips,
throat sore, ragged lungs
the pain of screaming at the deaf,
the futility of all this wasted breath.

How many more have come before us,
only to beat themselves ******,
to break themselves against the wall of lies,
to surrender to the ones they despise.

Despair is their way of saying you already lost,
the agony is greater when you know the cost.
Its not for us or them or the world we live in
that I tried and failed, and a failure I'll die.

It is for the countless yet unborn,
who will come into this world
wearing the shackles
that we couldn't prevent them from fashioning.
It is for the world that we will leave behind,
and the babies that will look back on us
not with pride, or love, or deep respect,
but with sadness, disappointment and scorn.

For them I wish I was stronger.

In the vast corners of the room was a telephone that read broken. Poets are really deep because they can turn nothing into something. To me, the telephone meant that us as our generation have broken communication. We get rid of our problems over text like ending a relationship or quitting a job.

She can't stop
It's uncontrollable
She just wants to turn it off
She just wants a switch
Turn them off for good
All emotions...
Especially love
For forever
It only causes her pain
Unrequited love
The worst of all
"Friend Zoned"
Backed against the wall
Last attempt
Wasted down the drain
She watches it swirl down
Then drops the knife
Sinking sowly to the ground
No heart + No life
= nothing, empty
and she's finally happy

Its hard to say goodbye.
Incredibly.

I am so sorry that you feel this was easy for me.
It was anything but that.

I never meant to hurt you.
I never meant to ruin everything.

Thank you for all the things you did for me.
Thank you for all the memories.

I am sorry I was not enough.
I am sorry I didn't treat you right.

But this is it.
Goodbye my King.

He said he caught himself thinking of my long legs when I was absent.

I froze...Silent and annoyed...

Perhaps he was over confidant when he leaned in and pressed his lips against mine.

I slapped him.

It made me feel cheap so I lit a cigarette. I inhaled deeply watching the smoke swirl... if I could just fade away with it.

Lights to bright and sounds that burst. My head hurts...I flick my ash.

Now he's frozen...just watching me.

Perverts and nicotine have the same stench. Both a bad habit I need to quit.