Blonde haired

blue eyed

beauty

schools queen bee.

she was a persons definition of

perfection.

she had it all

the big house

the loving family

the popularity.

What she didnt have was a

sane mind.

the times she spent

alone

were the times she

feared

most.

so she kept it to a minimum


she surrounded herself with friends

it helped her ignore the voices

in

her

head.

when she

needed

her friends

most

they werent there to

keep her sane

cause "jake is throwing a party, and its gonna be the highlight of senior year"


so she sat there.

the voices got

louder

higher in pitch

more demanding

as they tried to take

control.

And

all

she

wanted

was


to

shut

them

up.
­
There's a new queen bee now...

I will never be you
Yes you, with that crowd around you
Your life's blooper reel .. now my fantasy
When you ****, they exclaim "How fragrant!"
Because you're "hot", definition: conflagrant

Your smiles turn no's into nods
Your eyes a puppy dog's competition
Your Facebook friend count: 3000
As I stalk you, green, astounded

For you were the me that now I'll never be
Because I decided that life's worth being real
Fake is a tongue best unspoken
Fair weather friendships, never unbroken

Like a celebrity spiraling into oblivion
Ms. Popular is now the chameleon

Music was my way to drown out what I would feel,
trying to deny that it was real.
My skin would suffer from what I would do to myself
I couldn't take my mind off the silver object hidden on my shelf.

The silence of my bedroom
ultimately crated violence.
The things that left me horrified,
I saw constantly glorified.

While the most beautiful things can be birthed from pain,
The pain was not what was to be desired, the constant drain.
No one should ever think that the fear of gain makes you strong,
It should not be the subject in a song.

Blood stained wrists are not romantic,
It is caused by pain overly titanic.
Don't try to relate self horror,
With being an explorer.
                                                    Beauty is Beautiful,
                                                        Pain is Painful.

When I was younger,
I ran barefoot,
Innocent and happy.

As I got older,
I began wearing shoes,
Because that was 'cool'

They hurt my feet,
And killed my innocence.
They drew me to the edge of a cliff
And as I walked along it's edge,
I tripped over
A stupid shoelace,

And now I am falling,
Dreading hitting the ground,
All so I could be 'cool'

Grown Up "Cool Kids"*

Nowadays cool kids are wearing business
Suits *and  ties all the boring time,

Nowadays cool kids are chewing tobacco
Drinking Budweiser AND wine,

Nowadays cool kids are driving break neck
Speed to get to everyday places,

Nowadays cool kids are going to war and
Using bombs to "save us,"

Nowadays cool kids are paying $6,000 for
The cheapest pair of braces,

So this is what being "cool" is all about?
And this is what makes America so proud?

Where I come from being cool is being wise,
Staying clean and sober, honest girls and guys,
Who don't have to hurt their health
Just to have a really good time.