Sparked thoughts invoke fear, forming beads of sweat
Spurred on by these scars that we’ll not soon forget
This vertiginous vortex whips us along
Unwilling and restless, we’re compelled to go on

Heed peace in panic states
Lord knows the hour’s late
We choose to hide, don’t trust our fate
It’s flee or fight—it cannot wait

Spinning, swerving, bridges burning
Scenes shift and change but we’re still hurting
A carousel of doors revolving
Eyes shut and open, each blink absolving

Take off and leave it all behind
We’ll ne’er escape our judging minds
Change what you will, can’t be denied
Embrace darkness within the light

it doesn’t have to mean anything more
than a crumpled up dollar bill in an open guitar case
i hope one day i’ll learn to keep my head down
to keep walking instead of getting stuck in front of windows
it feels like i’m loitering in the parking lot of everyone else’s lives
a heap of squeezed ginger ale cans
and candy bar wrappers crowding my bare feet
i guess eventually i’ll have to leave and find out
things always look better through a side mirror
i glance back and see the orange trees in the median
a runner almost getting hit by a left-hand turn
i’m so glad i didn’t have to watch her die
instead i watch two college students nervously laugh
shifting their weight from one foot to the other
beside the crosswalk button and i sigh a little
they are on one side of the glass and i am on the other
i seem to miss the things i made sure would never happen to me
tuck myself into bed buzzing with the engine of
a snow-covered train, a reckless ellipses
it is comforting to want what i cannot have

Shining ever bright
Brighter than the stars
Glimmering in the sky, tonight

Twirling through every turn
Ever flowing strings
Surely with lessons to learn

Bumps may come along the road
Less so traveled and trodden
A message without a code
Lacking the need
If one should only read

Never knowing what one may find
When wandering along
Perhaps it was what was needed all along
Found in places most unexpected
All it took was to be redirected

Taken to an astounding view
Ever so near and new
A sky clear and endless blue
Fading to the dark
Let through the ethereal light
Of a wonderful night

- Jay M
March 24th, 2021

In a poet eye
Text are always dancing
To an invisible rhythm
Even the static figures
Keeps jumping up and down
Seeing through many lens
Lens changing with every step

I'm not sad
                                                                                     I'm happy sometimes
I'm not lonely
                                                                              When I'm thinking of you
I'm not here
                                                                                                  Daydreaming
It's not a secret
                                                                                I told you this in dreams
I'm not imagining
                                                                                      They're all true to me
I'm not in love
                                                                          I'm misinterpreting emotion
I'm not yours
                                                                                      I let myself be owned
I'm not me
                                                                         I'm what everyone made me

Sometimes,
when the face in the mirror isn't who I want it to be

and those thoughts,
those ******* disgusting worms crawling out of my brain,
to simply drive me insane

I think it's subconscious,
I never quite think it,
before the thought is reaching my hand

A little mascara
brush through my hair

(I want to feel pretty
again)

A dusting of powder
touch up my chapstick

(this face
THIS FACE ISN'T RIGHT
THIS ISN'T THE PERSON I WANT  TO BE-)

-
It's ok to be.
-

Switch up the perspective:


I Will fix my issues,
one brush at a time

A swipe of lipstick
layer eyeshadow

Please don't clump, mascara
Add some concealer

(I NEED TO FIX
THE VOICES IN MY HEAD)

Some brow gel
Some eyeliner.

Top it off
With a



[[I hear voices say,
voices far away
"say cheese!" click]]


I-
I'll be O.K.