#mine poems on Hello Poetry

mark soltero Dec 2020

WANT

each doubt in my mind
feels like a break in the atmosphere
inexplicable apologies flood my already clouded mind
there’s a lot in this life i want
you’re more than each to me
sad eyes
****** walls
and overwhelming feelings that control me
when the night falls
new moon clearing the air
of what’s unsaid
telling you all the ways I want me dead
i want to know what eats you
the cardinal tragedies that keep us apart
all day i silently search for blueprints to your heart
too afraid to ask
i have to face my fears if i want you

#want #new #mine #love #hellopoetry #changes #night #moon #dead #eyes

mark soltero Dec 2020

happy ≠ everything

nothing worth something is easy
but is this learned or a lie
because past my pupils
exists myself
exposed and cold
i just want to be pure and gold
longing for warmth
seeking purity through garbage

#garbage #feelings #mine #new #sad #depression #hellopoetry #pure #purity #lie

mark soltero Dec 2020

challenger

pressure gives way to explosion
to tell myself that I’ve gotten better
doesn’t seem to make sense
scarlet hues and melted flesh fill the air
it’s all I know
to be beautiful through suffering
to appreciate life through misery
to expect nothing in order to have something
the tides turn as i crash into the ocean
the air ******* life from my insides
the fish welcome me into their toxic waste
falling deeper into the abyss
as i disappear
so do the traces of my presence
regret is only experienced outside the norm
an avoidable anomaly
something that’s been hard to distance myself from

#new #mine #hellopoetry #challenger #fire #sad #waste #feelings #emotions #personal

Darina Forgacova Nov 2020

Before we met

Have you considered what will be your
first words when you are going to meet me?
So many right one to choose.

I know your answer now and it is perfect:
Never leave you alone my love.

So I will never leave you also.

I am curious about your eyes.
And eyebrows. I want draw their
shape with finger.
Look on you for a long time.
Think about what you think.
Watch your eyes.
To know I am yours and you are mine.
Forever.

#yours #mine #love

mark soltero Nov 2020

22 11 20

i lay here hollow
for you to fill the spaces between my temperaments
im so sorry i have enough anguish for the both of us
and that it may feel you can’t stand the burden of your own around me
But the lovely things between each switch
bring me unimaginable hope
That one day you can feel the same
i will repent every misery laid onto you
because im undeserving of your heart
im undeserving of your embrace
feelings i fight that say I’m undeserving of you
may one day i can awake
feeling that I deserve you as my only faith

#new #hellopoetry #love #feelings #mine #sad #faith #grace #undeserving #depression

Ashutosh Nov 2020

The end

it's not the fact that you left me
but that the world didn't stop moving
when mine did ....
i know i hurt you but tell me was it so easy
so easy to give up on me ?
yeah i made mistakes ,and i was mean
but was it so easy to believe that it was just an act i put up to get your forgiveness .
i know used that word "sorry " a lot
but was it so easy to say, sorry no more
after those heart filled realisations
after admitting to those mistakes .
tell me was it so easy to just walk away
its not the fact that you wont be the person that
i wake up to neither would you be the person i close my eyes on ,just the fact that i won't have anyone in the world to call mine now..
its not the fact that you are leaving me for good
its just that the world is still one piece while mine just shattered in front if my eyes .

#2020 #theend #quarantine #mistakes #realisatiom #sorry #forgiveness #world #mine #shattered

Isabella Nov 2020

Just Know

Just know that my heart wants what it wants
Just know from the start I want what I want
Just know that so far I get what I want
Just know that your heart won’t slip from my arms

I know that your eyes they cry and they cry
I know that you hide beneath a disguise
I know what’s inside your baby blue eyes
I know you’ll be alright and you’ll always be mine

#know #obsessed #love #rhyme #mine

mark soltero Nov 2020

imed

im starting to realize
i don’t eat
im afraid to chew
scared to gain more than an ounce
i thought this fear died
when the hate did
but when you’re gone
i don’t want to fight these pangs
giving in to their tiresome lull
maybe one day i can be as small as i feel
but that’s not the truth
i just want to feel like a man
longed for and strong
instilling fear in those who challenge me
until then i might eat
even more so in hopes that maybe
i can tear open my insides
to become beautiful on the outside

TRIGGER WARNING PLS DONT DONT DONT DONT DONT THINK THAT HAVING AN ED IS GLAMOROUS I AM IN RECOVERY FOR OVER A YEAR AND DO NOT SUPPORT OR ENCOURAGE ANYONE TO HAVE OR PRACTICE HAVING DISORDERED EATING

#new #desire #me #hellopoetry #mine #personal #strength #masculinity #ed

mark soltero Nov 2020

you’re not like other boys

i am not a man
***** made at best with a lack of quality control
i cry shamefully
waiting for the day
to find that my heart has officially grown cold
like all the good boys
that receive their praise
what id give not to ask
but to only receive
just for one moment
i want to feel
what it feels like to be treated like necessity
and not a burden
i long for everything that will never be mine

#fraud #imposter #me #mine #new #hellopoetry #masculinity #sad #depressed #bipolar

mark soltero Nov 2020

can i be good

i can’t help but think of how i will never live up
to any and every expectation
of others
and of my own

i wish i could live confidently
living without caution
bursting at my seams with power

but i am weak
i can’t be what you or i want me to be
that doesn’t really seem possible
with all that i lack

the silent whisper of confirmation
that this body is undesirable
my smile is vile
what i lack is all i have

they say make with do
but i rather throw a penny away
than hope i can save it for later
because that’s sadly how i am
wired to immolate

#new #mine #sad #hellopoetry #hopeless #depression #personal #thoughts #mental #illness