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Nicole Mar 2018
I'm sorry I'm like this
I genuinely feel insane
Because I love you so ******* much
But sometimes the bad stuff is consuming
And yet I just numbed myself with pain
Then took a couple dabs
And my positive emotions are starting to flow more freely
So I want to tell you now in case this fades again

I love you
Undeniably
I want to spend forever with you
Always
I'm scared to say I need you
But I know it's true

And I'm sorry I've been an *******
These states of mind scare me too
Which probably just makes it worse
But I'm really going to try this
For you and for me
Change is really intense
But for you I'd try anything
Nicole Mar 2018
I'm sitting in the bathroom
A knife in my hand
My cats near my feet
How could I do this darkness
In front of such sweet angels?
But still I do
The blood begins to sprout
And halfway through
I wonder why I'm so crazy?
Why am I even upset?
Why am I doing this?
And yet I only feel this calm
Because of the pain
And for the first time in a few days
I finally feel ok
Corvus the Crow Mar 2018
The piano was just a sound,
The drawings could never cry,
The kisses were never close enough,
And the words are never right,

The pull and drill of whispers,
Their dance inside my head,
Cold claws in cords of steel,
Reaching through the cracks in my skull,

The medium is never enough,
The emotion is an ocean of expression,
This tiny tub is too full of water,
Sinking under the raging surface,

Why so much pain,
So much blanketing loneliness,
This ache for more,
This lust for more,

To have back what was stolen,
To take what will never be mine,
To love in endless romance,
To drink in smooth recline,

Boom,
Snap,
Crack,
Break,

The ugly crooked grin,
The ***** air so thin,
The putrid water taking over me,
The sky so bleak and gone,

Where is all the love,
Where is all the peace,
Brianna Feb 2018
And in this weird dream I had things were brightly technicolor and everything played out so smooth.
It was strange and yet warm.
It was soft and beautiful.

But of course, I knew it was a dream, because you chose to stay with me.
You chose to sleep in late and I would wake you up with breakfast in bed.
You chose to skip work so we could go see a movie together and we laughed and kissed.
You chose to hold my hand and pulled me up towards your bedroom again and again.

It was strange.
It was soft and beautiful.
It was just a dream.
julianna Feb 2018
I am bothered when others are
confident and proud
because their mouths speak way too loud
they have a good relationship with their brain
while I am struggling to be sane
do you think you could quiet down?
everything is so out-loud!
You speak so much
that you don't hear
the constant ringing in my ears.
Mystic Ink Plus Feb 2018
Vibe of silence
Free spirit
Break a monotony
Adjusting the sail
No command, no obey
Philosophy of life

A different beats
Flavor of success
Defying fate
A limited edition,
In a new sphere
Ignite the passion,
Like a burning man
Sync of rhythms,
Moment in time
Nothing more exquisite
Like touching lives
Human connects

Recall a hacked dream
In a faint silhouette image
Profiled, public enemy
Enjoyed listening to lies
Worth of smile, nice trait
Taste of madness,
Insane is to be a sane
Content of life,
Never melt, Never exists
Like a black Ice.
Shared from my Anthology, Canvas: Echoes and Reflections, 2018.
Genre: Abstract
(gulp)

Couldn’t resist a minute more.

Relapse.

I again…

After six months sober...

Here.

In this pain I know all too well.

Ten years lost to this drug my veins ache for.

First breath in the morning and last thought at night, all consumed by it.

Every cell in me craves it.

That physical euphoria my body portraits.

Feels like someone has poured pure joy into every single muscle and fiber of my being.

It makes me feel so content

Every single bit of me is singing and buzzing with life and love.

It's like the ecstasy of *******— that first blissful, pleasurable pulsation of endorphins and serotonin.

This is what I feel when I first take LOVE.

And then...

And then, the honeymoon stage is over.

Fights erupt.

Never-ending debates.

Miscommunications.

Misperceptions.

No trust.

Accusations.

Lies.

“I’m done...”



Again, it feels like a part of my soul is leaving my body.

Again, sitting here numb.

A toxic love...

I’m addicted to,

And there’s no way around it.

It’s already deep intertwined with my veins.

Yet, no matter the toxic, tragic event that happened before, I sit here, and I want nothing more than to spend my life next to this soul.

To see his eyes unchanged as the skin around it wrinkles and grows old is what my heart will always desire— to stare at those eyes for the rest of eternity.

Dead air…


















So here I’ll wait, until you decided to come into my life again and repeat this déjà vu.
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