In the grander scheme of things, stars are just streetlights
Often times things feel like
They’re more of a hurricane
Than a passing wave in the golden horizon
And sometimes they’re too complex
To put into words or fully comprehend
The night feels wistful,
The moon more lonely than usual
And the stars don’t seem to
Form patterns in the sky anymore;
And you wait till sleep takes you away
To another night sky
Only this one is far too mediocre
To hold celestial beauties in its arms
Dawn tosses light yellow powder upon blue
Feel the dull ache of my ankles in the morning chill
Pressed upon the pavement is my single silhouette.
Past the trees and telephone cables
The sky is yellow powder decorated with glitter
The stars are still in the 6.50am sky
The streetlights still brightly awake past their bedtime
“It’s not as big as you make it out to be”, you’d remind me;
and sometimes I see what you mean.
Sometimes the stars in the sky are just like streetlights. Not as grand and mystical and faraway as I think them to be. Sometimes I feel dizzy and suffocated, caught up and spun in the eye of a hurricane. But as time passes, I find myself sat alone on a rock on the sand, watching the waves roll over one another, chasing after the setting sun - and I realise that the danger and the terror is over. Not for good, but it has left for a while - and that’s sometimes more than I can ask for.
In that moment, I’d believe you when you say, it’s not as big as I make it out to be.
written 09 june 2018 ; 3.22pm
Inspired by something shannon barry wrote, which i shall put below:
@barry_happy on instagram: "It's not as big as you think it is" is a piece of advice Elizabeth gives me frequently. It applies to pimples and problems and worries and heartbreaks. It is a gentle way of saying "I know you Shannon. And I know what you are doing in your brain right now. Stop that." Because I make everything big. So if you’re like me, and you’re there right now, let me be your Elizabeth: hey. It’s not as big as you think it is.
(And it’s going to be just fine.)
