Maybe it's not  knowing what the **** will happen or if you will even make it back to begin with that draws me like a moth to a flame .
Maybe I'm just so far gone and this is one step further from the edge and I know the madness will somehow keep me sane .

Headlights and strangers harsh faces echo my direction  towards nothing and everything in-between.
The road is a lover whom never returns that affection and maybe that's why you only want her more .

Small towns paint my backdrop as I chase sunsets maybe we will share this view without knowing my friends and maybe my story will find its end.
I cant pretend to know the outcome I just embrace the tornado and laugh at the destruction nothing sometimes means more than any
trinket clenched like a anchor it only binds us to one spot.

I embrace the winds and challenge the storms .
I am the ghost whom chose to be a whisper.
A shared bottle now empty memories will paint my epitaph.

Tomorrow is a  mystery and I only care to be part of this madness
Some questions are best left unanswered .

I will see you again my friends .

disease set up a limits,
all over crossing lines,
shark darkness pushing spirits,
forbid the Future bright,

when sources dried up cleaned,
when finish seemed arrived,
and body doesnt listen,
an orders stretching mind,

have lived ones life already?
have lived ones world they say?
all bettings leaving steady,
ones boat drown away?

this all regrets and sorrows -
will follow for the fate,
but yesterday, tomorrow,
all over Futures days -

fight back, combat an illness,
show up Your shining light,

couse constancy existence -
rulls only sleepers kind.

The music flowed as smoke rings littered the barroom ghosts for a second washed clean by the smell of stale beer and worn out lines.
It's here I'm home and here I'm most detached from it all I'm invisible only wanting to view and catch a buzz to chase the nights passing .

I sometimes question this existence wonder why the **** no direction suits me best .
I used to fight the urge now I simply have grown to tired to care .
And where odes another find themselves sitting next to me?

Maybe I'm to damaged maybe I'm just happy being alone .
I haven't found the answers cause I truly never gave a **** about the questions to begin with.

There's more reflection in a empty seldom clean bar glass than within my heart darlin  and my times all that matters to me now .
I have no options and the past is dead to me as the person who most hold to be the man I no longer can be .

There's always a fire burning  I just wash it clean to keep you away.

Maybe when I'm lost home seems the furthest place from my thoughts .
Like some left behind castaway I have simply went insane with time.

Underneath the lights reflection I stand the same fractured and wanting nothing more than a stiff drink and some old song to keep me company into this smoke cast fade .

Maybe home is anywhere I choose  it to be .
So try not to question the man who is but a stranger to even me.

Cheers

There is something
in your presence
that makes me feel
like I am returning home,
as though I've
traced the outline of that sparkling smile,  
                anticipated your kiss,
                        and recognized the whisper of your voice,
long before now.

Instances,
in which we have known each other
                        in some other
                                                 existence.
Ti­mes,
when I am acutely aware
         and can sense
             your disposition, cravings and            
                                        aversions
simply by looking into your eyes, hearing your voice,  
or contemplating your touch.

Our paths in this life,
        of course,
    have simply not allowed this to be          
                                    imaginable.

 But its in those moments,             
serendipitous moments,
           when I feel like
                       I am rediscovering you,
instead of becoming acquainted with the essence of you.

And it makes me wonder.

How can every word
   Whizzing around my head
Be the exact words
    I could never use
To describe
                                                                                                          My existence?

They try to catch me cause I'm falling from heavens heavy hands.

But I clutch on my mind before I lose it and stay stranded.

The spaces between my dreams is were I'll be standing.

I might never see the green grass as long as the ground's not placid.

I'm a survivor of a horrible accident which is my creation.

My faith died for long time.

But I'm not dead, I'm not dead.
Until I have died..

In words I can embrace you only to destroy all in flesh.
Are torments shared often compare are we not flawed my dear in love and charmed in life?

My monster of ego knows no weakness except the tears of your eyes I'm so sorry for the man I've become from demons I've cast we couldn't bare the flame yet in this dead of winter may we know are warmth.

Those eyes that I've seen fade now spring still my hearts wraith are the nights now colder alone or is my emptiness to much to bare?
Scars I have traced upon the flesh never mend that of this emotional drain you are that which I can never be .

You know the man not the image and I see through the past to what's of a bitter sweet embrace we have stood as enemies and loved as immortals.
A sunsets reprise often is the deepest sadness for in pain I see the beauty so few ever cared to know.

I am a villain to most and simply John to you.
Are roads cant be imagined yet I never would cast aside the wreckage for another to replace .

We understand what so few could ever fathom.
Together we are addicts of the abyss sometimes you realize the darkness brings far more comfort than the light .

I whisper to you in this night gentle for only you to hear.

Little girl do you grasp all that I can never say in words?

To most I am a monster but to you I am only John.