Leaves shake in the wind

As the rain pours on the forest floor below.

Water droplets soak the ground for growth.

Giving birth to new life

After storms and strife.

A fresh beginning, made from recent revision.

Sun parts through the clouds.

There's no more division.

A warm light now glows, giving view to a divine vision.

My soul now in remission.

It is time to make a very important decision.

To hold on, or go forth on the Hero's expedition.

Don the armour, be brave and bold.

Or stay back, let not the story be told.

To deny my heart, may leave me cold.

False stories I shall not be sold.

Behold, the guiding light, fire of my soul;
And through my example
Change how destiny unfolds.

when did you come in,
to my life?
funny how
i do not recall ,
a life without you.

the shape of your name,
has a strange kind of beauty

the sound of your voice,
makes my heart skip-
-skip a beat.

when did you start,
to love me?
i pray that you never stop.

i forgot,
the beauty of new love.
the innocence of,
discovery.

when did you become,
my best friend?
my brother?
my lover?

funny how,
the answer
does not even matter.

I Stick the whole world to my wall
and Notice
things that I almost Understand their real meaning

Twists and turns
Learning to check my speed along each curve
So much about myself I come to find is -
actually another thing.

The little neurons , moving about
so hyperactively
that it drives me into half a day of rest

or otherwise

What have I done those moments I have impacted them
whether by a blow from the fist or the nostrils

So much has changed
no longer do I indulge in the dangers of drugs
only the safe ones that help my physical pain

Slowly learning- but not before I'm ruined , to keep my hands off myself
As not to damage what sanity I have left .

Which fortunately, Is more than I could have based on the past decade
but unfortunately, some pieces of this puzzle of a young woman are missing-

That is okay, I guess the colors in between and I scribble underneath

I play a guessing game until my loved ones remind me of the truth
When they know it

Will I Always be searching for the corners to complete it?
I really don't care much for whole complete pictures anyways
Always folding photos to hide the faces of those who wronged me, crumbling unfinished pieces of art before wondering what I could add, only to replace it with another one .

Guess it doesn't matter- though when I dig through old memories, there are some things I find that surprise me.

How much we change year to year, throughout a lifetime as people? Is it more or less person to person based on our experience?

Quinine is used as medicine
to treat malaria in humans,
and quinine was originally derived
from a species of plant
named Cinchona;

I wonder
haw many new medicines
can be discovered
in plants, animals, insects, bacteria and
in all the species
of living-beings
on this wonderful Creation
we call Earth?

I am somewhat of a ticking time bomb.
I can feel the internal pressure increasing daily.
Reminding me time and energy are finite,
and that bitterness lingers like a bad smell.

Having little practice managing anger
it slips away from me like sand through my fingers.
Sand gets everywhere, leaving nasty texture only I can sense.
The dominos are falling; an unstoppable force.

The fire has been lit in me to discover authenticity.
Inherently, growing aware of every violation against my core values.
The sand allowed for lines to be drawn,
and I am not crossing them; an immovable object.

Static, stuck, still, yet not stable or sustainable.
Understanding that life comes with sacrifices,
I will no longer give away so easily.
Assimilation is removed from my vocabulary.

all the answers to
my questions can
be found in my
old old poems
(or by
applying common-
sense tbh…)

how f#cked up
do we really are
that we can’t
see the obvious,
plain, and simple
truth
when it’s just
in front of us?!!?
sorry,
I meant inside* of us.

Summer fills me with nostalgia in a way that I cant explain. But when the air hears up and the black ants crawl all over our house I find myself remembering when we covered the window with sheets so we could sleep when it was still light.

Most years I was alone, friends not good enough to contact outside of school.
I stayed up late in bed reading every night. It was during summer that I stumbled on my first podcast, on my first ****** novel, on my first question of gender.
In the heat of summer I sought change. Alone, I struggled with questions of college and career and the future. I despaired, sobbing into my pillow until I fell asleep.

Summer is full of possibility, of the past, of the future.
I caught fireflies out on the lawn, I put cicada husks in a jar and kept a tally, I invented games for myself and my sisters. I work late nights and come home to a warm house. I eat cereal for 3 meals a day.
The rules don't apply to Summer.

I was lying on her leather couch
This kind of love is not allowed
Two thousand and twenty one
Time moves on but stigma doesn't
I'm falling in love with her leather couch
I'm getting lost in the creases that she has created
My hands smell like discovery
Her hair looks like purpose
I was lying on her leather couch
I think it's a place where I could be found