Trigger warning: Self harm, cutting, substance abuse
the ceaseless agony
she endures and endures and endures....
until the burdens force her knees to give
everything weighs so heavily on her
and in her desperation
what else could a suffering mind do
but frantically seek refuge
earnestly pursuing escape....
the meds aren't enough
the pain cuts through them
so she wonders....
how many could she take?
two... three little white pills?
might it help?
she knows they'd notice the missing bottles
but she longs for a heavy intoxication
a dumb bliss
a few hours of happiness
let the pain melt away
replace it with stupor
so she considers lesser options
she could binge eat for mild pleasure
intertwined with heavy guilt
she could **** herself
oh right.... she can't because of the meds
nothing else offers her any feeling
she seeks emotionally charged art
music, poetry, shows
but it's not enough
it's never enough
so, in her desperation
when all else has failed
when the agony is unbearable
no solace in sight
she opens the drawer
in the safety of her room
uncaps her tool
sterilizes the edge
sets the metal to her skin
and drags it across
'til she drips red
