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I live on an island.
Just me and my 2.3 million thoughts.

It's getting crowded here,
I looked to the right,
and the money worries are in sight

I turn a corner,
there's housing waiting for an order

I spin around to the sound of my Independence,
crying with fear,
she may be about to be taken away

I look up and see my capabilities questioning me

I need my thoughts to stop all talking
This island is too full.
I want to get off

My finances are taking a hit
It's not my fault,
Not one bit

I can't take on anymore. My Island is about to sink

On the count of three… just stop.
A poem I wrote on the heart of stress and anxiety. I'm so glad I found poetry it's so therapeutic.
Nothing in life comes easy
There are things that make us stumble and fall
We all want things that come free
We want life to answer to our beck and call
But that’s not how we grow
We have to go through things that make us struggle
It may sound cliche
But what doesn’t **** you makes you stronger
The bad things we experience don’t stay
Things will get better after
After you gain that worldly wisdom
The kind of wisdom that comes with experience
There are times you will feel like a victim
It’ll feel like your life is going through turbulence
Just know at the end of that is a blessing that is there to earn
We always must remember to live and learn
I had a conversation with my younger brother about anxiety and fear earlier and he gave me some scriptures to help me through that so I was feeling inspired to write this.
Sharks have to move to breathe
Sometimes I feel as though I am the same
If I stop moving I will suffocate
Relaxation feels like a pillow smothering my face

If I stop running they will catch me
All the pain I’ve spilt
My shame
My guilt

All combined into a lurking monster
Chasing me through the forest
I want to pause
But I can feel the monsters claws

My lungs start to ache
The tears stream down my face
I cannot brake
I cannot lose this race
Indra L 5d
Fear teaches me, sort of aimlessly.

Blaming a resilience I wish I'd seen,
The punch I wish I’d been -
A prey I wished I'd hit.

Overshadowing the dopamine I’d like to feel.

Via guilt-induced tears, effortfully shield-building.
Via timeless dampening -
I’m nervously standing, brainlessly censoring.

But never has anger crossed that brain,
Never have I ever played this game.
Device
Scrolling
Screen
Underground
WiFi
Online
Last seen
Swiping
Typing
FaceTiming
Social
Apps
Anxiety
Notifications
Ghosted
Crisis
5G
Loading
Roaming  
Signal
Lost
What’s up
What’s down
WhatsApp
Connection
Connecting
Content
Addicted
Feed
Endless
Doomscrolling
Emptiness
Algorithm
Is
Relentless
Fake
News
Bots
Deepfake
AI
*****
Text back
Mate
Updates
Stories
Likes
Shares
DM
Sliding
Aubergine
Pears
Triggered
Trolls
Separation
Right
Left
Manipulation
Cookies
Cache
Crumble
Realisation
Screen time
6 and half hours
**** me
What a life
I wasn’t brave.
Don’t let them say that.
I was just tired
in a way no one could see.
Tired like my bones were made of grief.
Tired like I’d been screaming underwater for years.

It wasn’t about dying.
It was about ending.
Ending the weight,
the buzzing silence,
the way I could still be in a room
and still not exist.

I went to the roof.
You know the one.
Above the library.
It was cloudy
the kind of sky that doesn’t look down on you,
just swallows you whole.

I didn’t cry.
There were no shaking hands,
no last minute second guesses.
Just this strange calm
that felt like finally breathing
after holding it for too long.

I stepped.
And for a second
I swear
I felt free.
Then everything went black.
17:31pm / Let down by Radiohead was playing
I apologize too much.
I never think I do enough.
I always go beyond and above,
Still I’m too fragile to be loved.

I’m so scared of the truth,
Yet nothing else will ever do.
Happiness has been the goal,
But I fear forever feeling hollow.

You and I deserve the best of me.
But who am I—why can't I see?

I don't know how to say no.
People say, "stop," I still go.
Always there, always giving—
Yet alone when I need forgiving.

I'd climb a mountain, cross a sea.
I'd burn myself out just to meet a need.
But I've already lowered the bar—
It drags behind me like a scar.

The world is loud. The vision’s getting hazy.
Please help me now... I feel crazy.

So many faces—
Which is mine?
Each stitched with guilt,
A need to stay in line.

What if saying "no" could feel like peace?
What if I took a space just to breathe?
Would you hold me when I come undone?
Remind me I don't always have to run?

I'm worn, but still reaching.
I'm bruised, but still believing.
I don't need much, just to be seen—
Not as a mirror,
But a human being.
She sits with her silence,
Bound by her thoughts.
Life continues anyway,
But join in, she does not.

Though she would like to,
It takes time to decide,
And once she gets ready,
There’s no room in the ride.

So maybe she’ll start walking,
Or she’ll stay frozen in fear.
She wants to go somewhere else,
But she seems to be stuck here.

She’s found a doorway
Just a handful of times,
But every time she moves closer,
Further away it flies.

There must be a lesson
In this self-aware prison,
A continuous torturous cycle
From which she hasn’t risen.

Swirling and thrashing
In circular motions,
Part of her must like
Being breathless in the ocean.

Yet there’s a small part
On the left side of her brain
That hates this **** cycle,
The suffocation insane.

But she doesn’t control movement
And barely steers thoughts,
So here she goes again,
Busting down doors that should remain locked.

She’s scared to read new stories
With endings untold,
When all familiar tales
End predictably bitter and cold.

There’s bite to the freeze, though,
And pleasure in pain.
Echoes fill her mind’s chamber:
“Free us from these chains.”

No, she doesn’t need saving,
She’s working out the clues.
You say she’s isolating,
But it’s what she has to do.

So very easily distracted,
Hypnotized by honeyed words,
She falls in love so quickly,
Abandoning her puzzled curse.

And when it surely fizzles out,
She’s back here at square one,
A couple days of crashing out,
Erasing all the work she’s done.
Twenty seven years of this and it's surely lost it's fun
Lee 3d
I cut it because,
I know that I I don’t.
A cold swollen body,
Won’t always float.
Saltwater’s more harsh,
It stings in my throat.
Traversing the seas
In a decommissioned boat

They say when the lungs,
Swallow it in,
You're taken over by calm,
Three scars on your shin.
eliana 3d
my stomach,
it twists and it turns.
Should I go or should I stay?
These thoughts surround my head,
Scared of what lies ahead.
What could go wrong?
I'm not sure that I belong.
Oh silly me, just be free!
For this is your only chance to feel alive again.
Ive been really nervous as im supposed to be going out in just a few hours and my anxiety is off the charts lol but, I feel happy and face my fears i guess. Who knew social anxiety was so scary in the moment!!
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