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Where's the key

It's no mystery
The mess inside
It's pouring out
I want to hide

Lock it up

Make it shut up
Keep the door closed
clawing it's way through
In fear my mind froze

Bolt it down

It's breaking my crown
Should i end it's life?
I can't find the key
Maybe death will stop this strife
My own thoughts will be the death of me
Marissa 1d
i feel it in my chest
with every breath feeling heavier than the last, like someone is playing jenga
with concrete stones on my body

my eyes burn
the same type of pain that comes from gripping a hot pan
or pouring acid on your face

i sit atop my bed, restlessly scratching
my arms or my heels
dissecting the layers of my skin
trying to feel something
or for a sign that I’m still alive

then the thoughts come creeping in
about how my body is disgusting
and i should never eat again
and how i’m just not smart enough
and no matter how much stress I put into my work
it will never be enough

even my meds know that I’m not enough
because even the proper dose
can’t help me
Oscar 1d
Wasting time, hours spent doing nothing.
She once thought she could hold the world in her hands,
stand on mountains and face the gods.
Now she's stuck. Lost, trapped and out of time.

She worries about time, watching clocks tick by;
her hours are spent trembling, anxious of the rising sun.
The moon holds her gaze, gleaming down from her kitchen window.
"Why did you leave me?" she calls out, eyes sorrowful.

The moon just stares, fixated on the girl in the window.
Time keeps ticking by, the moon turning into the sun.
As the rising dawn arrives, setting fire to the cold sky,
she holds her head high and whispers,

"The sun will always rise." The sun smiles back,
radiating warmth that keeps her from turning to stone.
Smashing the clock, shattering glass on stone floors.
The girl breaths a sigh, the clock's ticking stopping.
this made me feel better
Naoki B 1d
Funny how
The only luggage
I’ve ever carried
Was under my eyes
This whole time
Ezis 1d
Are you okay? She asks me.
I nod yes but look down
She knows I am not

My past still haunts me
when night circles in
darkness never fleeting

In class I sit with my psychology professor's voice
somewhere in the distance
"What does anxiety feel like?"

Anxiety is the cheese steak
I threw in the garbage the fateful night
my friends in college told me they hated me

It is newly 14 year old Erin
looking over the side of Narragansett Pier
on her birthday thinking what if her head hit those rocks

The fear that no one will love me
I will continue in this world the way I came and will go,

I don't know how long these memories
will haunt me
my soul forever altered
I've hit a wall lately
A wall so tall it seems impassable.
I wake up daily to it encompassing my bed.
Making waking up a test of endurance.
Once I'm passed that, there's just another wall.
Around social interactions, work, moving, and to be honest.
It's all just ******* walls.
Walls I thought I broke down, that are now 10x as big.
Did I mention my fear of heights?
I take pills that are supposed to help,
and they do, but these halflives are nothing compared to these walls.
They're made not of cement but of sentiment and wicked dreams.
Thoughts of all the horrible options that could be.
Thoughts of a depressed self and a depressed spouse.
"You think the kid can tell?" That I'm loosing my grip?
That I'm terrified of the monsters under the bed?
I'm immobilized by my own mind like a car tire boot on my will to try.
Wish someone would tow me off to oblivion.
Or at least a place I could relax.
I'd modestly ask for just a few moments escape.
From all these walls
You will
find yourself
in all
the places
you're afraid
to look.
kk 2d
When will I stop feeling okay and start feeling more?
Owlycat 2d
breathe in, breathe out
it doesn't work like they say
its going to explode
out of my chest

i shake and i tremble
i stand up and get dizzy
nauseous and spots everywhere

i cant breathe
it hurts too much
i cant stop crying
my mind won't quit racing

breathe in, breathe out
this is how i die
right here, right now
there's so much pain

muscles ache and eyes hurt
focus on something
i'll be ok,
its just anxiety
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