lonely yet surrounded

This love is not the one you’re haunted by.
You are not subject to demons’ torment.
That scar is not enough to terrify.
That ghost of hurt is not malevolent.

Not everyone you see will wear a mask,
Nor every feeling from some witch’s spell.
No monster gives you poison when you ask,
Nor is your tale a ghost story to tell.

Your life is more than just a vampire’s meal.
You might find peace below the fullest moon.
Tonight for once release the fear you feel.
Redemption from your fear is coming soon.

Though heartbreak is your scariest thing yet,
To miss new love’s a scarier regret.

I don't want to sleep
I don't want to close my eyes
I don't want to start again

I'm scared of sleeping
I'm scared of closing my eyes
I'm scared of starting again

I'm scared

... We were surrounded by the blue sky,
by the mountains and the white lights.
... I was looking at you like no one else has ever done,
and that was good enough,
to make me forget where I came from.
... I felt something strange in my heart,
like if someone had pressed the button "Re-Start".
That made me feel different,
as if my ****** had been commited.

Ride through my veins, driven by your cruelty and anger
Leave me nothing, but those shadows and dark places,
You were afraid to touch, afraid to enter,
As my broken hands clenched red fabric,
Twisted it ‘round as whispered screams echoed.
The cracks though my being, held together by silken webs.
A rough touch enough to break me and scatter,
My mirrored reflection towards the stars.

I put on my pretty fairy lights and lit some candles
One of my favourite movies is on the TV
I have a bowl of popcorn in my lap
It’s a cozy Sunday evening and my birthday is next week
But in my head, thoughts are racing so fast I can’t tell them apart
I feel guilty for being so intense
And I wonder if any of these feelings are normal
I wonder why I can’t relax
I wonder why I can’t stop convincing myself that you don’t like me anymore
Why can’t I stop interpreting your momentary silence as you leaving.
Leaving. That’s a scary word.
I cry a little when I think of it
I delve deeper and deeper into the pit of fear and cry even more
And suddenly I find myself praying about a situation I don’t know if exists
Stargazing to take my mind off of events I don’t know if have happened
And I wonder:
“How do other people deal with this?”
How do other people deal with falling in love
Without the sky falling with them?