It's been a year
I still have no mind
I still don't think
For thinking is my downfall

My thoughts
Are poison
To my success
For they pull me off course
And push me into the abyss

I want to think
But i can not
For i've built a prison
That keeps me stuck
in this empty mind of mine

I tell myself can try to  
not be impulsive
And  not be indecisive
But i can't
For i never learn

Ive restarted my mind but
My thoughts
are useless
and unoriginal
And self deprecating
But they are still there
For i want to think

I do not understand
The thoughts entering my head
They tell me to shut up
To look pretty
And to blend it at the same time

These thoughts do not sound like me
Like the me before i stopped thinking
For these thoughts
Are not mine

It was never me
It was all of the people
Who judged me
And imposed their thoughts on me
Until they became my own

For the longest time
I was mindless
With no thought
For i believed thought was my weakness
Keeping me from perfection

When thought returned
They were no longer my own
They seemed perfect
But they had flaws
For nothing is truly perfect
If it takes away your individuality

Now i'm breaking out
Freeing my mind
I'm becoming myself
One again

I am not perfect
And i will never be
For perfection is impossible

Thoughts are finally flowing
And they are my strength
For they are my own

A sickening silence slithered into a starry soul
Sending shame slinking into sight
Switching  starry souls
Who once shined bright
Into sorry souls who weep at night

It's been months
since I've written a poem
since I've turned simple words into pieces of art
since I've made sad stories seem beautiful
and inspiring

Its been months since
I've had anything to write about
months of freedom
and joy
and smiles

Its been months since I've written
for I don't write happy poems
now I have
more sad stories
to turn into beauties