Mariah

Mariah Jul 7

Not without a fight.

The cruelest of all
To suffer despite resolve
Fighting while you fall

I refuse to die before it gets better and that's a threat.

#resolve #suffering #cruelty #life #relentless #fighting #tough #haiku #persistence

Mariah Jul 5

For the best

If you come back to
find me dead, it's just because
I see what you meant

I won't
but I wish I would.

#ocd #death #verbal #abuse #neglect #haiku #trauma #bpd #hatred #cptsd

Mariah Jul 5

Past our prime

How lucky am I
That my skies explode with pride
Hiding genocide

Free gaza! I am extremely upset with "my" country.

#holiday #misplaced #disgrace #genocide #dishonourable #gaza #palestine

Mariah Jul 3

Jumping hope

Hope, hope, hope
Is just like jumping rope
High highs and inevitable lows
And
If you really love me
Do so,
No matter how it goes

I have a good feeling about the rest of the year.

#hope #july #summer #light #random #practice #love #loss #recovery

Mariah Jul 2

She's older than me

Take me

Slowly

To the

Place I

Know I

Can be

Please just

Show me

Who I'm

Supposed

To be

Is this

Really

What you

Mean

When you

Told me

I was

Always

Free

What was

I supposed

To see

While the

Figure's

Looking

Back at

Me

Why does

She look

So

Pretty

Even though

She's older

Than me

I don't always believe this. Even still, I've started to be able to appreciate my face more as I've gotten older.

Though, I still feel 18.

#growing #aging #reflection #slow #rare #appreciation #beauty #age #acceptance

Mariah Jun 28

Who, me?

I am impulsive
I am strange
Lying in the bed I made

I am anxious
I am loud
I won't make my parents proud

I am restless
I am tired
I'm not one to be admired

I am obnoxious
I am trite
Burning bridges keep me warm at night

I am indecisive
I am sure
Enjoying what I haven't earned

I am curious
I am afraid
Cleaning up a mess I made

I am grateful
If I am at all
I have no regrets that aren't absolved

Your guess is as good as mine.

#revised #personal #growth #duality #change #bpd #ocd #disabled #manic #chaos

Mariah Jun 27

And I love her

My younger self would
love that I watch the movies
she did too, back then.

Twilight on rainy days, unashamed.

#nostalgic #haiku #love #nostalgia #kid #self #reminiscent #reflecting #unashamed #acceptance