Lost in my own world
In endless search of love
How has it come to this?
Why have the doves flown
to lands East and far
Where my heart cannot reach
She's there, I know
I sense,  I feel
A soul in roses woven
Her thorns do not hurt
She waits, staring at the rain
From a Kyoto high-rise roof
The drops wet her cheeks
And yet she moves not
Her legs dangle and dance
From above that neon city
Surveying her world
She endlessly searches
For love
And wonders - how?
Why? - Where?
With a glance into her mind
She finds me there
Starting at a blank screen
Writing a poem
To her name

Down there, by the sea
Where merchants of yore
Traded on shores
Treads She, whose countenance holds
Kind spirit and elven mean

Down there, by the sea
Where mighty Venice
Once brought ships to moor
Enchanting, with silence She stoops
Through the Ocean's azure door

Down there, by the sea
Where Empires fell
A Fairy dwells
That brightly seems, with endless gleam
To be the goddess from my dreams

Oh, dear Luna!
In thy light through the night
I follow ‘til come the morrow
When embarked through the dark
Thou reside by my side
So bright! Thy holy lume
So sacred! Thy godly rule
For no God hath before
Brought light to cursed night
And upon its undead shore
Spawned life from Heaven’s halls
O star of eternity
O queen of divinity
May the mortal man ne’er know
How among immortals
Thy crown glows!

Why does the Earth turn so slow?
Why do seasons change, where do they go?
Wherever it be, just let them know:
Winters were never the same since I lost my Snow

But they won't hear, they won't know
And to their will, I must bow low
Words shall vainly escape my throat:
Winters were never the same since I lost my Snow

They will echo through air, they will echo and groan
Flying up high, themselves they'll show
To God and Heaven, they'll pray and moan:
Winters were never the same since I lost my Snow

‘Hjalmar,’ the cold stone said
‘Hjalmar was his name.’
Naught more on the plaque stood
But that call to fame.

In sooth, I saw, upon the wave
The tow’ring iron mast
In the distance, his crimson mane
Flowing, and flowing fast

Faster still, the Flora went
Caring not for fate or wind
By unknown gods was it sent
Golden Shores to find

From the shore on I looked
Above that forlorn Sea
How deep, so deep, they sharply stooped
The Flora and her kin

Ne’er again did she appear
Nor her captain proud
Forever lost, but ever here
Hjalmar and his brow

Oh, spirit of freedom trapped in an endless cycle of foreboding thought

What awaits you in the inevitable, unknowing future?

Shall you be the conqueror of all that finds itself in your wake -

Or shall you be the adventurer, an explorer of this round globe;

Stretching far from the Dinaric mountains to the East and West alike

Does your freedom, forged from being lost and in an endless search for yourself

Allow your heart to love and to be loved? Will it open the rune sealed treasury;

Of your soul that lies so deep within the depths of Tartarus in your chest?

Oh, spirit so unnaturally free, forsaking yet never forgetting all that has passed

Shall your Pandora’s box remain unopened, awaiting for the ageless dream;

That shall decay it into dust and air, and return it to the fine Earth and stone;

That has given birth to so many of spirits upon its accursed soil?

What really is your freedom, spirit;

What is your secret?

Are you truly free, or only in nature and eternal wishes to fly like a phoenix;

Yet are chained to your own core, unable to move a single inch farther

Than where you already are?

Tell me, spirit;

What is the price of your freedom?

Does it require payment of flesh and blood from your own vessel

Or perhaps a surrender of soul to the ungraceful, to await an end

Within the fiery pits of Hell, clutched in His inescapable grasp?

Shall you, invincible and undaunted in your quest to see all that is to be seen;

To live all that is to be lived; To feel all that is to be felt;

Surrender your entire being to eternal suffering and torment;

A split second of clairvoyance exchanged for an eternity of blindness?

If to be lost is to be found;

If to be blind is to see;

If to be dead is to live;

Then tell me, spirit –

Are you truly free?

Again, woefully awoken
In this bed, with heart broken
A fading love has left a token
That lies heavy on the soul
And of it, I am the source
Curs'd with sadness and remorse
Starring glaringly into the walls
Reminiscing the times of old
I cannot help but weep
To into love’s madness slip
Pray God to let me her keep
Thinking: "Son thou thy love hast sold."
Entrap’d within that thought
I like any other would’ve ought
Say: "Th’ final battle is to be fought
On the heav'nly fields of gold"
And on those fields gleaming
Stands she brightly seeming
And as the stars godly beaming
Divine light upon my stones
Though there be nought but night
Perpetual and of devilish might
And only a daemon in my sight
"‘Tis all but fantasy," I am told
A lying wretch I cry out
And find myself in endless drought
Stuck inside a world of doubt
Was there truly a time before?
Is my mind too far astray
Have I truly lost my way?
Will, I ever again see the day
Where her lips I can behold?

Oh, tears unshed;
Where doth thine valley lie?
Where doth thine river flow:
In Heaven above
Or Hell below?

I hear it: the sands, they call for me
Golden grains scorching my soles
Beneath the Sun, walking free
On the arching desert dunes

Strung across the West
An infinite sea
Swift winds lead sand to rest
Somewhere in distant dreams

A voice whispers in the silence
Like a woman's lamenting song
Carried to my fading conscience
Among the dunes, I had died and gone

I have this wicked yearning
That is burning within my soul
For the sweet release
For the gaping void
I gaze at the belt
Of color black
And leathercraft
My neck hungers
My mind blank
As an empty textbook page
My heart wishing
To enter the ethereal plane
My soul weeps
For there are none to grieve
A footnote in the universe
I fade into oblivion
Into my own demise.

I have long lost any hunger
And fell into a deep slumber
Staring into the final ember
Of the faint dance of fire

I have long lost any feeling
And struggled to find a meaning
The entire world to me seeming
To have given up all desire

I have long lost any friend
And wandered lonely to no end
By the river’s dimm’d bend
Hoping to spark an ire

I have long forgot what I had
And thought myself to be mad
Until a soul of golden clad
Appear’d as a flaming pyre

I have long since woe’d
And to God’s name I call’d
But with silence He replied
Was it her or just the fire?

Bright watchful eyes of the Unholy one
Cast thy sight upon me!
Bring forth the fires of Hell
Bring forth the armies of Doom!
I offer thee my sinful soul
But one condition must be!
Bestow upon me one last kiss
Of a woman to thee unknown!
Let me this once not suffer and moan
Let me have one memory to cherish
Before I into the Nether perish.


Liar! Traitor! Unholy spawn of Hell!
Thou betrayed my final will!
I call upon the angels above
Radiant and divine!
To cleanse me of this curse
So ravaging and malign!
Bless me with thy holy light
And allow me to repent!
Revive my mortal soul
That into Hell was sent!


If only but for one moment
That I could bear witness for a final time
Her hair in locks, red as fine wine
Let me witness and lament
Let me witness
Let me die
Forsake me into the fires of Hades
No pain shall I feel
No tear shall I shed
In this Plutonian realm of Death.

Ha!
Wait, wait, wait
Speak to us son of none
What is to say a son of none
Speak to us as he spake
None have thus spoken yet
Speech is not mere sounds produced
No words knows this son of none
And he speaks not to them
Say it
He speaks not to them
Say it unto us
He speaks not to them
Say it and say it thus
He speaks not to them
Lips pale and trembling heart
Locked throat and heavy lungs
Words, needles, piercing darts
Pressed against two souls
Amidst the splitting sea
Collapsing onto one
Left behind in desert land
That spake not to them
Speaks not to us
But sounds the sounds of none
He who claims not to be
The bearer of lost love

The abyssal white of this page
  Stokes the fire of rage
  Strikes the sorrow of age
Oh you blasted ****** fool
You led yourself astray
  No there is no way
  To look or to stay
She is gone and aloof
God I hate to stare
  At this page bare
  Where, I ask, where?
I had nothing to lose
Or so I said and was made
  Memories do not fade
  Far is my bless’d glade
Whatever have I done to you?
What for are these words
  What kind of world
  Is so freezing cold?
He forsook me, too
Lately, I don’t think
  I don’t drink
  I don’t blink
All I have is null
But I have not sold
  Fragments of my soul
  I only let her go
As any man would
Let us end this here
  I grow tired, dear
  Run, there, tear!
Cry for what we could

I had a dream
One ever so daunted
By your presence haunted
There a child unborn
Ne’er to see no dawn or morn’
It is not before it was
A child, our love
Its grace ne’er to be felt
Its gaze ne’er to be seen
Its death an omen
Of what could've been

On this bitter morn’
At the passing of the night
Inclined I am by the crack of dawn
On white paper rhymes to write.
These days spent in solemn peace
Had emptied my mind of thought
I could not see just how it is
‘Till this poem to me was brought
Once again rustled was my soul
Stood still did my heart
Blood in my veins icy cold
In this peculiar month of March
What hath been forsaken
Presumably by my mind
From ignorance was awoken
To haunt these very lines
To haunt or to bless
Whichever it may be
I call upon forgetfulness
For only she can save me
I never should have met you
Not here, not now
Yet the Lord had a different view
High above this petty ground
Though to Him, I pray
Every night, and every day
Keep her eyes bright
And send me on my way
Allow me to forsake
These memories of her
Allow for her just the same
May our souls no longer hurt
Call upon the weavers of fate
So our destinies may realign
And each other we could find
In a better place
At a different time.

*******, revenant love
Stay within your dreams
Do not haunt my days and nights
Do not bring my heart disease

what is the boiling point
of the human soul?

‘I see,’ quoth he, ‘a star that fell; the star was me.
‘And the sky, my dream. My home, the sea.
‘To fly and soar. To fly and gleam.
‘Is to be the Sun. To burn and feel.
‘The godly love to rave through thee.’
‘Yes. I see.’ Exhaled; quoth he, ‘stars that fell; the stars were we.’

Friendship
Rarely do I profess love
To more than a person single
But I must do it now.
I am bound by sacred oath,
One in eternity written,
With a simple name it’s called:
Friendship.
Hereby I declare my love for all
Friends that comprise a part of me
And whose light guides my way,
Through valleys rid with dark,
And horrible terrors lying in wait;
To all friends that hold me dear,
Closely to their hearts;
And who I treasure more
Than silver or gold.
No soul here silently named
Carries any impurity,
But shines profoundly on Godly rays,
Reflecting the beauty of heaven
Onto life’s endless fields.
That is who my friends are:
My eternal beacon;
My very core;
My friends.

Oh, if only you knew
What I saw in your eyes
If only I could tell you
And touch your very soul
Perhaps the skies would clear
Perhaps the Angels would not weep.

a kiss
so small yet
so painful
on lips of mine
naught but ash
on my mind
the lips of hers
of lipstick red
with cherry taint.

Sole love of mine
Heed these desperate cries
Of my soul lost
Within your lonely eyes
Allow me entrance
Into your world
So beautiful and tame
Allow me to escape
My crooked realm
Decadent and pale
If denial is my fate
I plea, forsake me not
From your eyes
Like honey golden
From your heart
Like a glacier frozen.

There exists a dream girl
Roaming in her dream world
Unfathomable realms
She has explored
Telling stories never told
Through time she travels
On magic clouds
Like a child unspoiled
Forever young within her world
Of innocent whim
And nature pure.