I hope one day we can see each other and feel no pain at all.
I hope one day we can laugh like we used to and feel no sadness.
I hope one day we can look at old photos of us and not feel any regret.

They say time is the best medicine. I hope it heals us both.

I don't know what is more empty -
The look in my eyes when I stare at myself in the mirror
Or the way my heart feels when I think of my life without you

***** it hurts

Now I must learn to move on.
I must learn to not let your smile make my heart beat a thousand times faster.
I must learn to not smile against your chest like I do each and every time you hug me.
I must learn to not let your voice give me a sense of security, protection and comfort.
I must learn to not feel so much happiness when I see you happy, because our happiness is not shared anymore.
I must learn that you are not mine. I've lost you.

I now know things are over with you. We both do, and it hurts me so much.
I should've just kissed you last night. Why didn't I just kiss you? Was it because I didn't want to hurt you further? Was it because I was scared how I would feel afterward?
I loved it when you held me. No one can touch me like you do.

I really don't want to lose you, but I know I can't keep holding on.
I am stuck in a place of hopelessness. No matter what I do, somebody will get hurt. I would rather it be me than you, but I have a feeling that we will both feel the pain.

A little bit of pain is good. More is tolerable. But the pain we will both feel will eat us up alive - I pray we survive it.

What does "I love you" really mean?

It means that I accept you for who you truly are, with all your imperfections and flaws.
It means that I would do anything for your happiness; it doesn't matter about my feelings, it's about yours. As long as you are happy, I am happy.
It means that I can't go a minute without thinking about you, and you constantly occupy my mind.
It means what it means: I love you, really truly love you, and I will never leave you or let you go.

I know what we have is not true love.
I know I am not in love with you.
I know this because I am not passionate, infatuated, obsessed, crazy, insane and completely head over heels for you.

I love you - but I am not in love with you. I love you in the way I will do absolutely anything and everything for your happiness. It kills me to see you hurt or cry, to see you broken.
I love you, I really do. I love you very much.
Just please know I'm not in love with you, and I am so sorry.

Someone once told me: "If you truly love a person, you will be willing to love their flaws. You will take the bad with the good, because good comes with the bad."

I can love your imperfections.
The question is
Do I love you enough to do it?

One day you'll find the person who makes you smile.
And I mean really smile -
When your eyes crinkle and the corner of your lips raise ever so slightly
And your teeth burst out like rays of sunshine from the ocean's horizon

One day you'll find the person who makes you laugh
And I mean really laugh -
When you genuinely can't stop
And your sides ache and you gasp for air

One day you'll find the person who makes you happy
And I mean really happy -
When you catch yourself dancing for no good reason
Or singing at the top of your lungs because joy needs to be expressed

And when you find the person who makes you feel and do all these three things
Never let them go.

The doubts I had in the beginning are slowly but surely returning, and as much as I hate admitting it to myself, I can't bear to live a lie no longer.
I ask myself, "Am I happy? Or am I really comfortable?"

My answer still remains unclear.

When I look into your eyes, I see the ocean.
I see the depth, the coolness, the tranquility
I want to look beyond what you show, I want to see you.
And I mean really see you.

I wonder what my life will look like in ten years' time.
It scares me that the future is unknown, yet it thrills me.
I wonder what faces will surround me on a daily basis, if the people in my life now are merely passing through or if they are here to stay.
I contemplate what is permanent, and what is temporary.
I puzzle over what will occupy my time. How will I make a living? Will I be living? Will I wish I could relive my life ten years ago?
I pray God will stay with me, wherever my life leads me. I pray my wish comes true. I pray I will be living in true happiness and find true love.
I think everyone deserves that in this life, at least.

I love music.
It takes you to a whole new place, a different dimension. It allows you to travel with time, to go with the flow, to focus on nothing but different rhythms and sounds beating in synchronisation.
Nothing is more satisfying than finding a song that applies to your entire life, that relates to you when no one else can.
Whenever you are sad or feeling nothing but happy, I urge you to listen to a song and allow it to soothe your soul.

I'm afraid that we will run out of fire for each other, that we don't have enough passion to keep us going. I'm afraid that darkness threatens to engulf our flame. I'm afraid that you'll leave me; I'm afraid that I'll leave you.

I don't know what the future holds. No one does.

I made a wish in a wishing well.

I wished to fall in love, marry him, and find true happiness.
I thought of you when I flipped the coin into the water and saw it splash, submerge and disappear in the darkness.

Love is giving someone the power to destroy you but trusting them that they won't.

I have never felt so blissfully happy in my life.
My days are perfect when I'm with you.
You fill them with endless joy and I
Love you so much for it.

What saddens me deeply are people who have to hide pain.
The happiest of people are the most broken inside, the widest smiles carry the deepest sorrows, the most cheerful laughs disguise the bitterest cries.
It's sad how we automatically judge people we don't know based on appearance. The reality is, we don't know how they're feeling, what they've been through, and we most certainly don't have the right to label them based on what we see.

Please be a kind human.
Everyone is fighting their own battle.

The thought of you makes me feel, think and wonder a thousand things.

1) I wonder what goes through your mind. I wonder if I consume your thoughts like you do mine. I want to know your hopes, dreams, plans. Tell me all of it.

2) I feel warm, like the heat of a blazing fire. I feel it radiating from my soul when I think of your eyes. How strange to describe an emotion as warm. But I'm being truthful.

3) I feel blissful. I feel like I have found a purpose to live and to love. I feel content when I think about your arms and know that it won't be long until they find me again.

4) I see hope. Hope that I can spend the future with you, that we can go on adventures and see the world together with your hand in mine. I hope that we can build memories that we will never forget.

5) Know that you are special. You are not just any other person in my life. You have crossed my path for a reason. You may never know what that reason is. But I know. Trust me, I know.

6) I smile. The thought of you makes me smile. It makes the corners of my lips twitch ever so slightly. Not many people can do this to me. You are very special.

7) You are mine. Not for forever, but for now. And that is enough.

Today we decided to tell the world that we're in love
I'm officially yours
and you're mine.

You're the person I fall asleep thinking about.
You're the person I wake up thinking about.
You're the person who holds me tenderly, whose gentle kisses ignite flames inside of me, the only person who can touch my soul and not only my body.
I think I've fallen in love with you, but I don't know love well enough. I've never felt this way about anyone before. I've never had someone like you in my life.

All I know for certain is that you are my special person.
You are mine.
To kiss, to touch, to hold, to comfort.
To laugh with, to fight with, to play with, to love with.

I think I've fallen for you.

I think the worst feeling in the world is being misunderstood.
You think, believe and dream in a certain way but because people assume they know you better than they do, they instinctively think the latter of you.
My behaviour is who I am. I am myself. I am erratic, indecisive and irresponsible. Yes, I admit that.
But I also have the ability to love harder than anyone I have ever known when given the chance. The only thing that holds me back is fear. I can't invest everything I have in one person because there is always that chance they will leave me, and then I will be left more than empty  - I will be broken. I will have nothing left inside of me to love anyone else that isn't you.
I wish you knew how I really felt.
So yes I am misunderstood, and I am sick of it.

Don't make yourself easy for me to love.
Tell me the darkest secrets of your soul, because I don't just want to know the part of yourself that you want to show me. I want to know all of you. I want to open the doors to your heart and walk through the hidden passages. I want to look into your eyes and see a part of you no one else has seen. I want to know your flaws and imperfections so that I can love them endlessly.
Don't be afraid that I will walk away from you. Once I have the key to your soul, I will guard it with my life.

I chase your love around in circles.
I always want more. Give me love, give me affection, because it's what I crave most.

I love the feeling of you lying next to me. Hold me in your arms and never let me go. Keep me near your heart because I love the sound of it.

Touch me with your gentle fingers and hold my hand in yours.
I just want your love, and I find true happiness in the knowledge that I have it.

No one makes me happier
And no one makes me sadder
Than you.

How bittersweet life is! Here, let me give you happiness.
But know at the back of your mind that it won't last forever
Sadness is around the corner
Constantly threatening your soul.

I have started to realise how important it is to find happiness within yourself, and not from other people.
The worst thing you can do is place expectations upon someone that isn't yourself.
Because believe me, you will receive nothing but disappointment.

This may sound crazy, but I think I've fallen for you even harder than the first time.
You make me happy without even trying. The sound of your voice, the ocean that is your eyes, the gentleness of your touch.
I now appreciate things in a way that I never did before.
I believe in second chances. I gave you my heart, and I'll give it again because ****, I honestly think *you're worth it.

I really do.

Your hands felt like magic in mine and it made me feel a thousand feelings and remember a million memories.
You whispered the words, "I miss this" in my ear and I agree.

I miss you yet you are sitting right beside me. I miss your smile yet I see it every day. I miss your laughter, your voice... **** I just miss you.
I miss you so ******* much, it hurts me so badly.

I am lost in a tornado of emotion.
Chin up, little girl.
No one said this will be easy.

Goodbye to my first love.

I have never felt this type of pain before.
It's a new pain, a pain that eats right into your bones and makes you question your very existence. It's a pain that hurts you so badly you would do anything to escape it.
No wonder they call it heartache.
It is literal.
I can taste the salt in my mouth from my tears running down my face.
I can still remember the sound of your heartbeat when you hugged me against your chest.
It hit me at that moment that it would be the last time I can hear your heartbeat. The last time you will hold me.
You are everything I love and everything I hate. Because that's the truth - I loved you. I still do. I always will.
I will never forget the happiness you gave me. I will never forget the way your hand felt in mine. I will never forget your smile, your laugh, your voice.
But **** how I wish I could forget.
It would help me heal if I could forget.
But then my biggest fear would come true: I would lose you. And above all things, I don't want to lose you.
I hate myself for hurting you. I hate you for hurting me.
The funny thing is, I never imagined this happening. I never imagined it being so difficult. I never imagined it hurting so ******* much.
I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for hurting you. I'm sorry for not being the girl you wanted. I'm sorry that I ended up being a disappointment.
I miss you so much it kills me. It kills me to know I can't call you mine anymore. It kills me to know I am no longer yours.
Was I not worth the fight? Did I mean that little to you?
I feel bitter but I know in the end that what we had was special. It was something I will treasure forever.
I don't regret it. Once time has healed us both, we will be able to look back and smile.

Thank you for the memories.

Love letters prove that he can write more **** than he can speak it.

Just for one moment, I thought things would work out.
Just for one moment, it seemed
Perfect.

And now I'm up at 1AM with tears dripping down my cheeks thinking if I have imagined it all.

I still see you in my dreams.
How is it possible that you manage to haunt me in both reality and sleep?

This proves that even though my mind says no, my heart continues to want you.

When I miss you, I look up to the sky.
The colour is identical to your eyes
And then I find myself smiling
Because I'm reminded you're always near me.

Love is a ruthless game.
I dare you to play it.

Take a chance
Open up your soul to another person.
Give them a part of you.
They can hurt you, love you, break you.
They can leave you feeling alive
Or empty.

If you play it right, you will be rewarded.
But be warned: play it wrong, and you are asking for death.

It's unforgivingly dangerous.
You should play it though. There's a chance you'll like it.

I want someone to look at me and think
****
She's the one.

And when I see it in your eyes, I will know the truth.
I am yours, and you are mine.

Today was different.
I held you and I felt happy, content with you in my arms. I lay my head on your shoulder and opened my eyes to your big blue ones, smiling down at me.

But then I remind myself that I would feel happy with anyone in my arms, because that's how much I love love.

I am afraid of giving you my heart.
If there is one thing I will detest myself for being, it is vulnerable.
I can't stand giving someone the power to destroy me. I will avoid that at all costs, which is maybe why I can't love you.

I don't trust you. I love you, but I can't trust you with something as fragile and dangerous as my heart.
And the sad thing is, I don't think I ever will. Your heart is wild and open and is home to many people.
Mine is just for you.
And if one day you leave, then it will be a big hole of nothingness.
Empty.

And I can't let that happen to myself.

I long to find my soulmate, my own special type of lover, designed by God specifically for me.
I have the urge to find you. I know you are somewhere in this word, probably just as lost as me.
I pray our paths cross one day at the perfect time, so that I may look into your eyes and know that you are The One.
Are you thinking, dreaming, wondering about me too? Whoever you are, out there, in this big wide world?

Writing poetry at midnight because I can't fathom the thought of losing you.
Somehow I hope you find this and read all my words unspoken.

We are together, yet we are not meant to be together.
I am terrified of hurting you more than I can love you. Your happiness is all that matters to me and I hate the fact I am giving you sad happiness, I can never give you joy without the pain.
You don't deserve that.
We love each other so much that it is dangerous, it's toxic love. The type of love that we both know isn't right, yet we carry on drowning in it anyway.

The truth is, you never were The One to begin with.
I lie down every night and ask myself the same question:

Am I in love with the idea of love or am I in love with you?

It broke my heart when I saw you cry.
We may as well be strangers, but at that moment I didn't care.
I wanted to run to you and demand that you give me some of your pain so you didn't have to feel it all. I could see you dying under the weight of it and I wanted nothing more than to save your precious soul.

Pain is a burden and it is unavoidable. It will never leave us alone; it will lurk around us like a dark omen and keep us in the shadows until we give into the screaming in our head and just
Feel it.
It killed me to see you suffer and know there was nothing I could do but stand helpless.

I can't lie to myself any longer.
You still consume my mind and my thoughts and I would rather die than admit it.
I hate the fact that I can't control that I love you. You got me hooked on your sick games and you are like a drug to me, an addiction in every single way imaginable.
It's funny because you made me believe I was special. You spoke words that I so easily overlooked because I thought I knew better than that. But I can't pretend those words didn't impact me, didn't make me so impossibly happy. I would be fooling myself if I said I didn't want to hear you speak them, and I would be an even greater fool if I said I didn't want to hear them again.
I still remember the first time my eyes saw yours as if it was yesterday. I knew from that very second that you would mean more to me, and I to you. You leaked bad news but I wanted it all, I wanted my heart to be broken by you.
And broke it you did. You had me at your feet, I would have done anything and everything for you because I was your prisoner and I was yours. I was trapped and defeated and I couldn't get out of the deep hole you had thrown me in. I remember spitting the dirt out of my mouth and thinking that I would never hurt you as much as you had hurt me.
Do you have a heart? Can you love? Do you know what it feels like to love someone so much you would die for them?
I say I don't love you, but you are not easy to get over. Especially since you continue to haunt me like a ghost in my past and present, and you will undoubtedly be there in my future.
How can I tell the truth if I can't accept it myself?

I am just an ordinary girl that laughs when other people laugh or cries when other people cry.
I'm a girl that makes stupid, irrational decisions and contemplates life while watching the stars.
I'm a girl that writes poetry at midnight and eats dinner for breakfast.
I'm a girl that falls asleep thinking, dreaming, missing or falling in love with you.
I'm a girl that listens to music to escape the hurricanes of reality that are being thrown in her face.
I'm a girl that wants to experience the joys of life, and live it to the utmost fullest that she possibly can.
I'm a girl that feels sad and lonely at times but will never show it.
I'm a girl that loves the taste of honey and the smell of cinnamon, that enjoys all things sweet as long as they are bitter.

Be different. Be insane. Embrace the music your heart sings and the wild creature that is trapped between your ribcage.

Know that you are different, and that is okay. You are unique. God placed you on this earth for a reason, and that reason was not to blend in. You are your own perfect self.

Sing the song that resides in your soul. Have no shame. Let the world know that your voice is one to be heard. And if no one can hear your shouts, then

Scream.

It's a new day.

I hope that this poem finds you, I hope that you drink in these words of comfort and know that you will get through this day. Know that every human has a purpose, and today you may find yours.

Know that you are not alone. Know that your battle will soon be won. Know that there are stars in your eyes and galaxies in your head, and soon you will be soaring among the moon.

I hope this poem makes you smile. I hope it makes you think of the good things in life, the things that make you feel warm.

Know that you are special.