I hate myself for blindly believing
Every word you said
For following you unquestionably
Eagerly going where I was led

I hate myself for my naivete
Thinking that you would stay
Never saw your true intentions
Now they're as clear as day

I hate myself for foolishly trusting you
Giving you all of my heart
Never should have depended on you
When I was breaking apart

I hate the way I easily let you in
Watched you rip me in two
Most of all I hate myself for
Falling in love with you

It hurts to hear you say I am crazy
Although I know it is true
Love brings out lunacy in me
I am only like this when im with you

Thoughts of touch drive me mad
When gone wonder who you hold
If you would answer your phone
Some sanity I could uphold

Instead leave me in our cold bed
Choosing friends and fun over affection
I stay loyal by your side
Conflicting emotions pull me every direction

Was not psychotic when we met
Never have been the jealous type
Your behavioir has proved you're a traitor
Evidenced by tears I cobtinue to wipe

After many lies and stories
I am not sure what to believe
I lost my mind, paranoid
Obessessed over the way you deceive

If I could I would vanquish the sickness
Each morning bad weather we find
Want to calm impending storms
Can't reach your marvelous mind

Dreams of delusional lands far from here
Thoughts and ideas cannot be contained
I do not care if you are sane or not
These issues can all be maintained

I understand I am too much to handle
Want to save you from insanity
Afraid craziness will consume you as well
If you want, I invite you to explore this madness with me

I’m sorry I can’t sleep,
That I spend my nights in constant agony,
Closing my eyes and trying to stay calm
But never finding rest within my mind.
I’m sorry I always have a headache,
That I have a constant pain behind
My eyelids, a torture that plagues my temples
And unmercifully spirals around my head.
I’m sorry I have to fake my way through
Every day, smiling and laughing while
The constant fatigue drains at my soul,
Tempting me to snap at everyone.
I’m sorry I frequently wake up in tears,
Fully convinced that the terrors of the night
Are real and tangible, and even though they aren’t,
I know they’ll come back night after night.
I’m sorry I’m too scared to tell anyone
What I’m going through, too worried
That they will think I’m weak, or stupid,
Or that I’m lying to gain attention.
I’m sorry I apologize for everything,
That I am paranoid, worried sick about
All the wrong I’ve done, and all the
Wrong my mind leads me to believe I’ve done.
I’m sorry.