I want to die
I know my parents love me
I know they care for me.

But I can't breathe inside my house
I don't want to face the same days
and the same nights on repeat
I know life is tough and i need to be tougher but I'm sorry i can't bear it anymore.

You can call me coward
i seriously don't care
But i just hope no one should face this
What im facing right now.

I know my problem is not that big
And I should fight and try again
But I'm hopeless i just want to die.

Just like People have a Right to live peacefully i want myself a right to die peacefully without any question.

I have to make them proud
but I don't know where i doubt
They make sacrifices for me
but all I do is to let them down
I always endeavour not to hurt them
but it's me because of whom they cry.

Maybe I am cursed to make their life miserable
Maybe I am a loser who is destined to fail forever
Maybe I should stop giving them hope
Maybe I should move out from their lives

I'm hopeless, I'm empty, I'm broke, I am faithless, I'm vain, I'm a failure.

Just for once i wanted to hear them saying that they feel proud because of me but maybe I'm their doomed son and just like me my dreams will also be in vain...

I remember the day when you said you don't fear losing me anymore perhaps you had capitalized only you will i adore

forever after, the fear was started taking its shape you started taking me for granted while i looked the other way.

Slowly and quietly my fear started taking a giant shape when you started avoiding my calls and breaking our laws.

I was so helpless but still my love for you was so full i broke my heart every single day with a fear that one day you may leave.

Today when i abruptly read these lines "there can't be any love without fear" the flashback of yours came to my mind i started daydreaming what if you never said those lines?

The only polarity between us was
You wanted me, whereas i needed you!

The same old fire
started burning again;
The toy which you have burned alive
Somehow survived the plague.

I don't know if true love really exist or not but I'm **** sure if somehow it does then it's not like how you loved me!

Thanks for leaving me
I needed to find myself.

All I need
Is a tight hug from you
To join all the broken parts of me.

And when it's comes to love
I'm ******* immature person.

I wish I could save those words
Listening to whom my heart emerged

They are still seducing my mind with their arcane
And all i could do is to hope that they aimed at me again.

The drops of my tear
Telling me you're not near
The color of love
Telling me to stop it's over

These lips of mine
Wanting to touch the heaven again
The heart of mine
Wanting to **** by you again

The scars on my left hand
Showing how deeply I was in love
The crack on my mind
Showing how much you're corrupt

The pain in my body
Erasing these symptoms
The hate in my blood
Erasing the shadow of us

The soul of mine
Seeking revenge
The sweat of these night
Will take your breath.

Look deep into my eyes
It manifest no lies
I'm done with your fallacy
Now I have no mercy

The deeds you did to me
Will never be pardon
I will face the eradication
And I will stand strong

Until then you keep
Laughing on my situation
Joking on my imperfection
Mocking on my glorification

I promise I will conquer a new lease of life
I promise I will show you the pain the sorrow and the consequence
I promise I will come back to you
And i will smile, smile and smile.

Tears are drying and I'm trying
To forget you and to forgive you
But this heart of mine
is filled with pins of hatred
that can never be removed.

Liquor flowing through my veins
And I'm drinking blood as a drink
Hoping it can **** either one of us
Knowing I'm the only one who have to suffer.

Come and watch how helpless you made me
Come and watch how badly I'm waiting for my own death.

Today i declare out loud to the universe that I'm over you and i promise one day I'll show you how hard I was broken because of you and your lies.

Aye khuda bata de
Kis haq se na nafrat kroon main usse
Akhir Usne hi toh Cheena hai usko mujhse.

Respect the time
Then only time will respect you.

Jab mohabbat dil se hui ** na
Toh dil tutne par
Zakhm aur Nafrat bahot gehre hoti hai

This year taught me people will leave if you love and care about them so much.

Don't try to find love
Love will find you
At right place at right time
Just keep patience.

Life is beautiful without some people in it.

She left me and I started loving myself!

Your lips and cigarette both tastes and acts alike. Hence i never missed kissing you when you left me.

And after you left me to die alone
Drugs helped me to live a little longer.

You were destructive 
You destroyed some of my parts and left me mercilessly.
But some parts are still begging to die by you.
Please come back and destroy them too.

If I had a gun with two bullets
And I was in a room with you,
I would shoot at my heart twice.

Your memory breaks and heals me everyday

And after that night i started believing in love
when she kissed my lips after kissing my flaws.

Abhi toh aadhi raat hi hai,
Din ka aana abhi baki hai

Abhi toh unki aankhon mai khona suru hi kiye hai, unki yaadon mai khona abhi baki hai

Abhi toh unke lafzo ko hi sun paa rhe hai,
Unki saanson ko sunna abhi baki hai

Abhi toh bas beete hue pal hi yaad aa rhe hai, aane wale kal ko samjhna abhi baki hai

Abhi toh khuda se lad pare hai hum,
Unhe manna ke tumhe pana abhi baki hai

Abhi toh bas tum humse dur hue **,
tumhra wapas aake hume gale se lagana
abhi baki hai.

Abhi toh aadhi raat hi hai,
Din ka aana abhi baki hai

kaash ki yeh itna aasan hota
ki tumse baat krne se pehle
itna sochna na hota

thoda puch lete hum tumhre baare mai
thoda bata bhi dete hum aapne dil ke halaat
thoda haas lete tumhre sath mai
thoda roo bhi lete tumhri yaad mai

bata dete tumhe wo sarri baaten
dikha dete tumhe wo sare alfaaz
suna dete tumhe dharkane aapni
sunn bhi lete tumhri madhor awaz

thodi der k liye hi tumme wapas kho jate
es aandheri duniya se kahi dur chle jate
tumhre sath kuch aur pal bhi bita lete
khud toh thoda sa pyaar bhi kr lete

Par kaash ki yeh itna aasan hota
tumse baat krne se pehle
itna sochna na hota.

Kabhi chhor kar jaana na mujhe,
tujhe rok nhi paunga
Behad pyaar karta *** tujhse,
Lekin bayaa nhi kar paunga.

Haan shayad jee toh lunga tere bina bhi,
par tere saath marna chahata hoon
Haan shayad teri yaad bahut aayegi,
Par iss dil ko maloom hai tu kahin nhi jaayegi.

Ro bhi lunga kissi ke kandhe par sir rakhke
par mujhe shaant karne ke liye tu nhi hogi
Muskura bhi lunga tere jaane ke baad bhi
par tu yeh na samjh lena khush rahunga main tere bina bhi.

Kaash ki samay ko yahin rok pata,
Aane wale kal ko naa dekh pata,
Khush rehta in palon me,
Kyunki sayad kal tu mere sath nhi hogi.

i understood Love pretty well when she left me.

Have you ever left in a situation
where you want to write a poem
and you have exact words and emotions to write about;
but then looking down at your own words your eyes start hurting so bad that now you don't want to write it any more?

And sometimes I think I'm cursed;
for whenever someone tries to come close to me, they leave me broken.

sometimes i laugh when I'm alone
sometimes i dream of you when light is on

sometimes i miss you when I'm with my friends
sometimes i want to hug you when everything seems like the end

sometimes i try to control my feelings when you say you missed me too
sometimes i try not to blush when you come too close to me

sometimes i ponder how did someone as beautiful as you came into my life
sometimes i wonder if I'm so much in love with you?

She nicknamed me "Home"
I asked her why she chose it for me
but she never answered;
nor did I push.

Years passed and things worsened
She left me alone to feel all pain.
I thought she would return to her home;
but may be, she was in search of a new home.

The name troubled me again.
The voice inside me questioned
"Why is she not coming back
when she called you her home?"

My mind hated her for getting away,
And tried hard to forget her in every way.
While my heart had the mind of its own;
It knew she would come to me very soon.

And then, my eyes found her
Her old laughter rang in my ear,
the same old smile made my heart flutter
But this time, she smiled for a stranger.
I realized that I was the home
which she lounged around in, when she felt low.
A shoulder to cry on, that's all I was.

I was her old home,
But it still gave me hope.
One day, may be, she will be back
Wanting again to be in that old home

The only thing that is more intoxicating than her eyes is the sound of her voice.

i knew it from very start that
One day you will leave me in dark
but i didn't know that
i will make that darkness my home.

I don't believe in forever, she said,

With a million thoughts in my head,
I said,
someday someone will make you believe in love and eventually you will start believing in forever.

I'm afraid that you are coming closer to me
And soon you will get to see my flaws.
I wonder what you'll think of me
once you know them.

Will you get mad at me?  
Will you ask me why I didn't tell you earlier?
Will you ask me why I hid them from you?
Will you leave me and never come back again?

Winter was the warmest that night
When you kissed me for the first time.

You smile, i smile
You cry, i cry
You get upset, i get upset
You get happy, i get happy
You loved me, i loved you

Then why is this
You left me, i can't let you go

And if a turtle could he would walk faster
Just to watch Her smile.

Remembering you never hurt me;
Forgetting you does.

And its one year since our break up,

I hope that every morning when you wake up you don't think about me

I hope that every morning when you're in your bed you don't wait for my good morning wishes

I hope that every morning when you get confused you don't miss me for choosing the color of your dress

I hope that every morning when you eat your breakfast you don't care about whether or not i had mine.

I hope that every afternoon when you get bored you don't miss talking to me

I hope that every afternoon when you
need a little motivation you don't need my stupid motivational speech anymore to get motivated

I hope that every evening when you go for walk you don't miss holding my hand

I hope that every evening when you watch the sunset you don't need me to make you feel that you are more beautiful

I hope that every night when you need someone to share your feelings your heart doesn't call out my name

I hope that every night when you go to sleep you don't twist and turn in your bed and reread our old conversation

I hope that every night you have a reason to wake up for next day, A reason which isn't me.

Maybe all this is just a nightmare
and when i wake up i will be
lying next to you.

My heart and my mind were fighting
She said "HEY" and they both stopped fighting.

I saw a Shooting star
and wished to help me
to make things right between us

But instead of falling on Earth
it goes up away from Earth

Every night I write a poem for you

Hoping that someday you will find and read them
And then i know, you will hug me tightly just like you used to do
and then everything will get fine just like it used to be.