Happy birthday to all mothers out there alive or in angelic form.

You will forever be missed Angelina Descovia Aug 1, 1958

Time to return home to your glorified kingdom. Jan 6, 2006.


Do not rush your time to leave this realm somebody other than you needs your story in order to survive!

If you are here today, somebody other than yourself needs you alive!

I know we are all human. Humans aren't eternal, for on the contrary the soul is!

I pray your life becomes a "legacy", for you guided me at a point as inspiration as many of you have.


They say angels never cry.

It puts my mind in wonder on where rainfall comes from since heaven is beyond the skies.

I'll never forget your voice.

I'll never speak of you in vain.

I'll always remember that you brought us love to keep us free from harm and pain.

It hurts to go on with your energy. I do not condemn this world or any God.

No source is at fault for your departure.

I believe this much is true

Everyday I break and rebuild myself until I'm good as new.

In the skin that I'm in I feel lost

I have not done enough to earn my wings or to say I have a "Golden Heart"

I will never forget quotes and poems you composed in your journals of your journeys

You're in a place of safety and harmony where love is eternal.

Heaven is a place for angels and for we will meet again.

I will always remember the memories that give me strength to fight and protect our youth.

You empowered many and open eyes to many truths.

I will forever remember.

I will forever fight for light.

I will never forget you.


Thank you for everything mom. ❤️

The silence is powerful. All could be heard was the three voices in my head. To be in position of the new age war. It was seen in premonitions, ancestors spoke to me, in languages never heard by the living. My spells fell meaningless to aid as assistance for the greater good. Was any of this to become true at any point?  Never it dawned upon me, until I stood in midst of it all as a witness.

Aspirations of a greater and mystic purpose. Limitations in a human body, with a mind capable of breaching borders and enabling boundaries.

High frequency pitched screams (not belonging to humans), Clashing of weapons, elemental magic, nature, forces of the cosmic used in the measure of offensive and defensive methods. Sounds, all colors, it collided and exploded beautifully. Yet, it still weighed heavy on my fatigued heart.

Watching in amazement the angels overthrow the demons.  I saw the other version of myself giving everything to be a victor.

THIS IS MY WORLD. YOU FALL AS NOTHING HERE. YOU SHALL FALL TO YOUR HELL, WHERE YOU CHOSE TO MAKE IT SO FOR THE INNOCENT " Dark Descovia danced around attacks, that failed to reach in the slightest, the malicious smile on his face with a questionable expression, never changed as he snarled. His wand transformed into a sword, while swiftly swinging it at an enclosing group of surrounding horrifying monsters. The attack was so beautifully orchestrated, it appeared to be effortless. Seeing an athlete, perform the most simple task in mere minutes.  Human eyes could not detect or keep up with the speed in the manner this was done. The monsters all fall to the ground, headless and vanishes by a flicker of black fire.

FIGHT FOR CONFINES YOU TO LIVE FOR YOUR PEACE. IF THAT CHILD MEANS NOTHING, WHEN HE IS MY EVERYTHING  THEN LET ME FIGHT ON MY OWN. I DON'T NEED YOU IN THE WAY. I WANT YOU TO UNDERSTAND, I WILL KEEP FIGHTING UNTIL WE ARE NOTHING! _ " Dark Descovia dual vocals sent tremors throughout the battle field.

The full moon floating in the twilight sky, was noticeably starting to crack and perhaps, battling for hours made me suffer from mild or severer delirium. My other side, with his own will and body, seem to suffer nothing from this. Asides, from being more frustrated and having blood-lust for justice.

Shielding my timid eyes, in fear as numerous demons appeared out of the blue, violently triumphed holding their own as well in battle. Being able to witness all of this, front row seats to the demise. Standing wearily using my sword as a crutch, blood seeped from wounds visible through the holes in my clothing.


I cannot let the world, my loves live in. Die. Fate, please do not end my story here. I need strength._  My teeth clenched, blood formed and leaked from my nostrils and corners of my mouth. My charm necklace, even had this particular glow to it. Another warning, I failed to acknowledge in a timely fashion.

FlashBack Moment Before The Apocalyptic War

"DAD! You don't have to fight to save this world!!! You taught me to save this world with words! You can do the same! Nobody has to die! Don't leave us!!!! _ "    At 6 years old, never thought Isaiah's voice would reach in depths and heard so strongly even in my weakest moments. The image of him, embracing me tightly, and tearfully sobbing uncontrollably. I decided to listen and depart with darkness.

"The war does not put fear in my heart. The heart of this world is trying to mend in all ways of feeding into hatred. It's highly upsetting. There is no solace without sound or color. I refuse to die for nothing, when living for you is everything!"_  

Dark Descovia stated as he twirled his swords, like drumsticks for that matter, one in each hand until they became motionless blurs.

* Apocalyptic War *

A figure in a black cloak appeared right behind me. My efforts in defense, were aimless and pointless. Trying to swing a sword on my part, which had the weight of multiple life forces. I am no master of swordsmanship, compared to my otherself.  In moments, I recall only seeing the figure wave it's hands in a ritualistic formation.  Finding myself, soaring through the air. Life immediately struck me with a freight train, traveling at the speed of light. The battle raged on angels, spellcasters, empaths all against evil. Never, did I think I would see my other side/alter ego show any emotion other than confidence and anger. His eyes swelled with anger and filled with tears. Running towards my falling body, in slow motion in attempt to catch me from hitting the ground. Drowsiness consumed me with warmth washing over me. My essence pouring out of me. I am not certain if I was falling to the end or heading for a new beginning.

Aloof. I wonder within myself in a state of stagnation.

Fear only prolongs it all, acquiring needed stability to our destiny.

I am powerless, watching this perfectly magnificent storm.

Why am I here? Why am I here? I use to know you so well.
Now, I feel like you are someone, I have never known.
The light was calling out to one of us before.
It was never you. You never deserve the pain this world descended from the skies. I will give anything for it not to be you, not to be anyone I love.
My love is nothing without you being here.  Still falling, I close my eyes trying to remember the final good moments....

All family and friends from every walk of life appeared before my eyes.
The funny thing about this is, it felt like a dream. Everyone I ever known past and present, was there smiling and at peace. Dressed in all white even my other side was there in the crowd of family, smiling carefree without a single weapon in hand

"You can't protect the world. Our children lives in. If you stay dreaming" Dark Descovia spoke to me and froze reality with his voice.

Why does everything hurt so bad...my power is not strong as anyone else's I spoke to him. He exchanged no words back, only our eyes spoke to each other.

"You have to save this world. Your life does not end HERE. BELIEVE IN YOUR LIGHT. IT EMPOWERS ALL IN THIS VERY LIFE"  In angelic unison the voices of family, friends, Isaiah, my other side and my lover spoke to me at once.

I've accepted it is now my time to fade....fade into the storm and become the light.... . haha..... _

May I close my eyes and finally rest in the name of purity for all salvation?

I will come back for you. I may be different, my love for you will remain.
If my life ends this war for tranquility. Then this world can have my soul....

"Soul?? You forget. There's two of us....You have more to connect to also"_

The day I was informed, I was suppose to have an identical counter part.


"I am neither Matthew or Matt. That is a title belonging to a part of myself, consumed by the darkness.


A life of nothing, is there anyway to depart from this?

My own hatred brought me to suffocate on the light in my lungs.

The monsters inside, reminds me through vices to be strong.

Alcoholic nights. Mornings with Maryjane to ease the pain.


The weight of sadness and the madness hits me like a freight train.


The anger is the heaviest anchor, bringing my soul into the depths of torment to never breathe in freedom again.

Where did it all go?

What is left to show?

For I do not simply know.

My shadows been keeping company. In the darkness, I feel so lively.

During a full moon, transformation into my dark twin, activates sleeping forces dwelling inside of me.

There is no escape....

As I lay here thinking of you
All my thoughts grey and blue
I wish I could see you, I wish I could.
Then maybe my life could be understood
But still I'm down thinking of you


Eye for an eye
Heart for a heart.
Tooth for a tooth
Wondering in consistent circles
I am running and ripping myself apart.
I only want to be part of thoughts
That gave me peace to
live for my truths.
It's all in living color.
Yet, I feel grey and only see blue.
I have a reason to hold my head up
Although I am down in my
feelings, thinking of how much
I am missing you.

Cassandra & Descovia
08/03/2022

I opened my heart

To someone who would

Never even open his

Eyes To see me.

You were all

But it was

So easy for you

To watch me fall

I refuse to let you

Carry the pieces of me

Even if I break

I will build myself

From the ground up

with everything you

Fail to Take

My heart is open

My eyes they can see

As long as I keep

Striving and Growing

There will be far more left

Than just mere pieces of me!*

Descovia & Rein

Her heart is endless, infinite.

Her love is deep like the ocean.

Her love is like a magical potion

Rituals in transition

Illuminating lights in motion


The sparkle in her eyes captivating

The joys she creates to enjoy the world are fascinating.

Her laugh? Contagious
Her smile? Breathtaking
the melody of her voice surrounding my entire being
I found my light, so long after being imprisoned by my shadow for so long.

I want nothing more, than to be tangled in her embrace.

Entwined to her eternal grace

Held captive in her soul
drowning in her ambiance

Your love is life!

I will cherish and protect it with my very own.

For now and forever more!

*Elizabeth Outlaw & Descovia

My ears ring with frequencies when you speak my name.

I know you are a gamer as well, and you been great at this game.

Studying my work. Wondering if it's about you. Eye for an eye and even the blind can see, You wouldn't even give up a tooth.
Covering up your flaws, concealing worries hiding behind old ways and phases of "youth".

Trying to decipher the lie, between fiction and reality. Trying to undercover "The Truth". Every chance and promise offered went invain. I watched it all go down the drain!

No options left, but he's always the one to blame. I am not chasing clout or fame.  

So how is this your problem? I got a lot on my brain. I can't afford therapy, I'm trying to hide the pain. Restless nights left me, crying in the rain. Did things out of good and bad. I was doing what I have to! In order to maintain! If I could go back to past, I would do a lot things differently but still remain the same!

I am just holdin
All on my own
Trying to protect my prince and his throne.
Forgive me Gods, if my rights led me wrong!

We all been forgotten, used, abused and foresaken!
We live amongst killers, instigators, manipulators and rapists!
I been all for my peace.
Never been down for the hatred. It doesn't matter how you take it!
Some of yall stick around, hoping a brother of another color, never make it!

In 2020 never have I ever, had to Fake FLEX ****. All of you in your feelings, throwing mixed signals, while getting encrypted in your own codes, ha! Playin' like we're not living in a Matrix!
Grow tired of living, in a world of "Lies".
Hoping you would give me some peace of mind.
**** a piece of *****, or piece of ***!

You never saw the signs, or knew what they define. I been lost in a bind. Torn away from all that was mine. Suicide sounds fine. They always say,
"Yo Descovia, you gotta chill with your FEELINGS at times!

But unlike YOU. MY feelings be pushing me to GRIND!"

**** everything you gotta say.

You stress me to
Say what you mean
While you over here hating
I am still living my dreams
It doesn't even matter
what you think, I am gonna
continue to do me
That's the way it's gonna be!
You should've believed!
You should've believed!
You should've believed!
Nothing else more to say!

PEACE!

"365 days in a year. 52 in a half weeks. 12 months. The times, where I could no longer count. 525,600 minutes without remembering what provided me with clarity and contradictions, imprisoned me to remain captive by my own spells. This is the result of conjuring forces, meant to remain behind close doors. Within me in a lovely disguise, sleeps unruly beast whom is beautifully wrapped in moisturized medium brown skin, battle scars, tribal and memorial tattoos, with a strong voice. I am no avenging angel. But I will slay demons for these very angels, even if this war could threaten the human race. Never did I consider myself one.
I am more than willing to sacrifice anything, but may it be, as long as it's NOT any extension of myself, in my beautiful babies.
My spells condemned those whom are immune by the light of invigoration and unwilling follow a path of righteousness in enlightenment!

"If it does not reward life with offerings of tranquility. It matters not to me. I rather it be cast into the shadows, before my moment to awaken on the other side. I am not only, willing to make this sacrifice alone. I am willing to become it!  "

Matthew Descovia


-Well in my heart, death isn't the answer as in killing oneself or harming others for things they've done. It's unjustifiable, like the prison system where people hurt people who cause harm. Instead of exploring the root cause or trauma triggering those actions._
"Cassandra Lozano

"What questions would you ask the world? If you can speak to everyone at once?"

As wrong as it may be, if you cause pain for the youth. Then I will never be a saint for causing harm to those whom prey on the innocent.

No baby has the skill-set to make life changing decisions.  
Your life matters nothing to me. If you sour the taste of salvation.
When we all live longed praying for truth and eternal life without anguish!

If it was possible without harm. I'd Scatter myself beyond the cosmos, figuring out why Wanda cannot grant a single wish. The blame does not go to Timothy. He too, believes in magic in his heart. He lives by it. Much like we all do. Dream big star, moon, indigo, and rainbow blessing babies!

In a way to heal the broken so that there is peace....

I am not afraid to become the hero needed for this world.

These children will not be led to darkness.

When all of them are glorified light-workers!

I am not only, willing to make this sacrifice alone. I am willing to become it!

Slamming my head continuously against the wall
I felt time and space break and froze
Myself and my Darkside fought
The battle raged on powerful enough
to cause stars to explode!
Shattering through dimensions
Fractals luminated around my eyes
containing Greek numeric codes
Traced everything in motion
inaniment objects morphed in and out of reality.
Stricken by toxins contained
within malice of the human mind
Falling freely from all!
Deprived of emotional attachments!
Relying on adverse forces, in high hopes
of restoring purity! The pressure renders me helpless and discouragement settles in vital organs.

Petrified by the various timeless
effects of this infectious disease.
The screams could not be heard...
Not over his voice. This version of myself
was stronger than any counter part I had to face.

"If you had to destroy
yourself to save everything... What is left of your morale, you choose to immortalize?" To believe we fought
with valour confined to nothing more!

Other than walls we put up as fronts.
Regretfully to acquire honor sought in truth!
Truths that yearn for placement
The darkness shall not assail!!!! "Foolish of me to believe
That we held the same intentions!"
We were part of the same being.

Descovia and Darkness.
Now it's just me in the dark.

This bond by no means
could be stabalized



Blood lust only made you greedy
You have awaken fears buried for ages
I thought,  were protecting each other!
What offerings would suffice?
Hear my voice and remember your place
These words are not evidence
of salvation that we desire to
bring forth into our foundation!

You will not break me...
Bury the chaos within your wrath away!!
Leave the innocent alone!
Your evil intentions
will not shelter another heart!! " I AM NOT AFRAID OF YOU! "

The feeling of my very soul
Imploding within my body.
I feel my head sinking into my heart.
I am s l o w l y .........
Going to into
The pull of an
endless time warp.
Drowning within myself
The intensity was rushing
through me in the form of a headache
sending us on a nonstop, unprepared
breath-taking ride.

The silence which followed the combination of good and bad memories flooded my vision with tears transforming into blood.
A new light awaken in me....

white butterflies filled my eyes
Will I be spared from
The terrors which long for salvation?
Laughter surrounded me
It gave me state of security
Thoughts coming more vividly
Clarity at last... Baby laughter
Filling my heart peacefully with bliss my mind
Eases it way into a calm tide. Everything of love
dissolves into my soul.

Its finally clear around
the hungry darkness and the shadows vanished as color returned.

"Daddy" The voice belonging to a savior of purity restored reality....

I have every reason to live. Even he will not take that from me.

Even if you are me.

To Be Continued....

Please, put my respect on
my name when you think of it
or get caught up in some ****
If it ain't broken then why you're
over here pitching a fit?
I'm no easy target
So, you betta not miss
Try me and watch it go amiss
Up, up, away, in smoke. Set fire and burn all of this!
I am growing tired of cursing in my pieces
but these fools wanna play me like a *****!
I want real one by my side, call us Lilo and Stitch.
I'll be ****** if anyone takes the light from you like a sith.
I be on crazy ****. Never harm a jit. Losin my temper quick. Pop a fool like a zit! . Descovia is the name. Ha! Remember it. Play with my demons. They dismember ****!

I am with problems out the ***.  Call me the "nemesis"
**** suicide, I'll go genocide, I'm going through the tides, I am limitless!
This is for Isaiah, Charlie, Mason, Princess Genesis!
What in hell on earth do you mean? The corrupt deserves all forgiveness?!
If only you can see and feel what's in my mind as victim and witness.
I don't care what it takes, I'm breaking the numbers and chains for a difference
I am advanced at this, and you're only an apprentince.
Make change for your life if what I say catch interest!
Why is it I gotta get loud to get everyone's attention?
I need you to hear me out...
Please, just listen

I can go Batman
Without a bat
Cut the snake’s head off
Like I am samurai jack
I got more tricks than
a cat in a hat
Fire my element
never chill or relax


Fire’s my element never chill or relax
They be doing **** for a react
Get my hands on you it’s OV
The way it’s gonna be straight facts
Push a brother to be on the attack
I am going full metal alchemist
Goblins, titans, pedos, all laying flat!
darkness  taking over, nothing new
Answer the phone,  your child is missing you!
Descovia or Matt which do you listen to?
Am I being too much? What am I to you?
If I left or died what would you do?
The mirror is a curse
I see a better me in my kids
Don’t be like your parents
“Be better and be you
I wouldn’t put anything
on paper not true
that’s word to the youth!
That as real as it gets, no excuse
Don’t give a **** about livin no lie
Cause at the end of the day I will die for these babies as Well as all of my truths!
Let’s finish this!!!

Always feelin, I am in the wrong place
At the wrong time!

Emotionally withdrawn falling far behind
Being torn apart from all that’s mine
All I wanted was love !! (Just love baby)
**** dolla signs!
never wanted your heart in piecesssss
Only wanted a peace of mind.
I know he’s hurting
While I am acting like ***** fine
You’re worth more than media
and live time
Pay attention to red flaaagggss but
All sides of me be crossing lines!
Pray for my recovery or downfall
A man is doing all he can
to stay alive!!!
My fight with my demons!

Snow has covered everything
The unsettling comfort
composed of these
Lonely and cold times
Turns a heart to stone to indulge
In these harsh winter nights
Brought me to become more
pensive than ever before
Because on days like this
I remember how fragile I am!
That time is precious and
I could just melt for you
any given minute!
I’m just a frozen drizzle,
collected on your eyelashes
Just like this snow on this green
The stars that fill the sky of majestic wonder.
Continous love resonates strongly within my inner being. I breathe in your light and it consumes all tainted and misconceived by voices of lies!
Your embrace made me feel secure.
The warmth of your glow gave me infinite energy!
But, soon enough I’ll be a melted drop of snow...
Like the ones on Christmas trees
after the season is over
You will be my glittery ornament,
that embraced me once upon a time
On a snowy day on Christmas Eve.

- DESCOVIA & Instagram: Cinnamonbunpuns

[Chorus]
I follow the code
You already kno
I be quick with it
Like I gotta get it and go...
Hard hitter like head shot.
Flying high. Spacebound. Ya'll be Trippin over Moonrocks.
Big bang. Black super sayian .
Tell Isaiah, his daddy is a Thrill seeker.
For the ****! Go hard as the Game, its all gucci gang!
**** a hater. I am a magician.  I'll make you a believer.
My power level is over 9000 maxed out Gogetta!


[verse 1 Descovia]
I cannot *** with no man
That has no love for his child
My boy is the reason I PUT IN MILES
I laugh, I live and love to make ppl smile
Live your life right or drown in denial
Suffocating for everything I wanted to be!!
From childhood to now
I followed the code the G
You progress or you fail It's
all setbacks on repeat!
I did this, for the fact I needa release!
Play with my fire
Like a ***** wont bring the Heat!
Eat. Sleep. **** the beat.
Faded in smoke
it's all Resting in peace
Memurized from the last moments of magical memories.
Pray for restoration from the mayhem
manipulated by aspects misery
Make connections I am one wit tetris. Don't any of you.
DARE **** WITH ME.
Anybody, i show love to publicily
I swear MOST OF YALL, swear you're bllndly following freely, I am no leaader
Ya'll help leading me, I'll be ****** if another soul leaves without their wings.
Everything aligns in order I am organizing an assembly!
Thank god for Demi Lovato,
for bringing me for my eyes to see
the Demi God in one as me!

[Chorus]
I follow the code
Never needed yo vote
May the universe be with you
for ******, be doing most.
You already kno
I be quick with it
Like I gotta get it and go...
Super sonic. Mind infused to the cosmic
Hard hitter like head shot. Do what I got to  for all my people.
We gotta eliminate all the evil
Big bang. Black super sayian. When I am gone.
Tell Isaiah, his daddy is-a Thrill seeker.
For the **** Go hard as the Game its all gucci gang,
get your grind up. Before your time's up!!!!

[verse 2]
I'll spill blood for protection of every child's name
My chaos is controlled. I'll have you hooked. it's melodic
I am a burning phoenix, get wrapped in phonics
Think twice,it's all phenomenal, it's a process!
Don't rush your time...
Enjoy and relish
in my boy's progress.
**** my existence? I'm just living.
Why you easily offended
by misleading contents?
Take it out of element
Exploit Different contexts!
You got this baby boy, baby girl.
Don't rush it, it's no contest
I am not giving in to the evil.
**** the nonsense, from a Dr...we learned
I have no sense-sincerely
My reflection can't mirror me!
Superior-supposedly, not intimidated by inferiority.
Change your ****. Make your move. Do things differently.
Cold as fire. No Ice. May lost souls wondering find liberty.
Infinity can go in for me, I'll show you all, there's nothing that limits me!

Another day another dollar.
I give everyday my all.
Knock on wood, I not am taken by tomorrow.  Alone in the dark, sitting in a corner. Missing the times being
in my crib, drinking milk from a bottle. Always at my fullest, this world trying, slowly to make me hollow. Now, I am drinking from bottle just to **** the sorrow.

Running in circles. To be consistent on who to follow.
I am persistent at every percent
Everyone to be content, forgive me for  time not being in reach for me borrow.

_BANG_

Glass shattering. Blood stains the floor and ground. Silence fills, sirens sounds.  Running through the city, trying to avoid lights to find you.  It's not the sound of my mind shutting down. It's a sign the Gods in hand with mother nature wanting to keep me around. Get the point? Guess, you wasted a whole round. I treat all as if they are blessed with grace and crown.   A person like Descovia, once lost from your life, can never again be found, he is this, and that. You can associate me as an advocate with any selected desirable adjectives and pronouns.

But
Here I am...
There's no stopping me....

🎶You can't stop the reign
Where will you go now?
No no no..
You can't stop the reign.🎶