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"cinderblock" poems
I was relaxed, and deep in thought The type of talk that silence brought When just in earshot it rocked, tick tock tick tock "Must be a clock" I told myself and resumed my thought Though as the seconds passed I could not, Despite the will with which I fought Do to its incessant knock Tick tock Tick tock I searched for the clock Unable to find the train I sought I grew more and more distraught With each and every tick and tock That find the clock, I could not As the silence grew more fraught With the knock, Tick Tock Tick Tock I knew the pain of Lancelot On and on it ticked and tocked I cursed at the unseen dreadnought It no longer merely mocked But each and every tick and tock Became an unseen onslaught TICK TOCK TICK TOCK T'was 11 o'clock, When my heart felt the gunshot Though the shots I could not block And on and on the bullets poured Further into the fray I bored Each foot a cinderblock Weighed by war I slowly walked Tick Tock Tick Tock How I'd make it answer for Alas With little blood left to speak for Desperately I implored "Restrain your hands that caused such gore; We need not fight evermore!" But when I heard the ceaseless knock Tick tock Tick tock I new my words had been ignored And slowly collapsed to the floor ****** and bludgeoned when I hit bed rock, I had still found no clock But tick and tock it had forgot The church bell rang t'was 12 o'clock, Though mortal wounds the seconds wrought I no longer was distraught And as I lay in the hemlock It occurred in my last thoughts I would miss the beating knock tick..., tock... tick..., tock...
0
Mar 28, 2016
Mar 28, 2016 at 9:04 PM UTC
Pendulum
I was relaxed, and deep in thought The type of talk that silence brought When just in earshot it rocked, tick tock tick tock "Must be a clock" I told myself and resumed my thought Though as the seconds passed I could not, Despite the will with which I fought Do to its incessant knock Tick tock Tick tock I searched for the clock Unable to find the train I sought I grew more and more distraught With each and every tick and tock That find the clock, I could not As the silence grew more fraught With the knock, Tick Tock Tick Tock I knew the pain of Lancelot On and on it ticked and tocked I cursed at the unseen dreadnought It no longer merely mocked But each and every tick and tock Became an unseen onslaught TICK TOCK TICK TOCK T'was 11 o'clock, When my heart felt the gunshot Though the shots I could not block And on and on the bullets poured Further into the fray I bored Each foot a cinderblock Weighed by war I slowly walked Tick Tock Tick Tock How I'd make it answer for Alas With little blood left to speak for Desperately I implored "Restrain your hands that caused such gore; We need not fight evermore!" But when I heard the ceaseless knock Tick tock Tick tock I new my words had been ignored And slowly collapsed to the floor ****** and bludgeoned when I hit bed rock, I had still found no clock But tick and tock it had forgot The church bell rang t'was 12 o'clock, Though mortal wounds the seconds wrought I no longer was distraught And as I lay in the hemlock It occurred in my last thoughts I would miss the beating knock tick..., tock... tick..., tock...
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59
My father is an old truck Sunbleached red Breathes broken bottles A faulty catalytic converter throat All the smoke trapped inside But the nicotine helps his brain function Cinderblock sturdy But skinny A single pillar holding the roof up A man built in a time when you had to tell things it was time to die Leave them in a field somewhere and forget about How do you write a love poem to a car of a man Built in a time without airbags? A car of a man who crashed with you inside so many times You learned about rebuilding from experience From trial and error And how do you forgive a man who can no longer tell you he’s sorry? Trucks Don’t feel Don’t give up Don’t hurt you on purpose Sometimes something inside just breaks And no one catches it And maybe you crash Break a nose Black an eye As far as I know I am not a broken man But I’ve learned where all the parts go And if I am my father’s son A mechanic more often than a car maybe Then I will be fine The truck is dying And beyond repair You forgive it for that It is old and past its time And maybe it can’t say that it’s sorry But there is a field somewhere that you plan on leaving it To collect weeds And rust And be forgotten So you forgive it
0
Jul 29, 2014
Jul 29, 2014 at 4:59 PM UTC
What a Mechanic Knows About Forgiveness
maple-cured, smoked, rawhide hands, tarantula hands bulldozing rice onto tines like an icebreaker ramming through glacial bergs, Holly Golightly on the tv, on mute, and oh those hips, that figure, in that black dress, banana hands cracking Alaskan king crablegs and ******* the juice and eating the meat, legs spindly and hairy and soaked in butter, dripping, liver cooking, roasting, sloshed on gin, cribbage board patinaed in dust, he eats his liver, downs another gin, cracks another leg, crab hair caught in his teeth, Holly talking about getting the mean reds but he can’t hear it, his luck run out, his luck a prize from a box of ******* Jack, and the snarling throb in his head, cinderblock face, cinderblock house, 3-day-stubble, has he had enough (to drink)? not by the stubble of his chinny-chin-chin, liver is gone, crab is gone, so he eats the eyes, dowsing his ******* Jacks in gin, yesterday wine-in-a-box and Cheez-Whiz, sprayed right into his unbrushed maw, a one-person wine- and-cheese fête classy as it gets, he’s Mister High Society, Cheez-Whiz crust in his stubble, and a cinderblock CRASHES to the floor and it’s lights out, and Holly, still no one to hear her, saying she’ll never let anyone put her in a cage.
0
Feb 27, 2015
Feb 27, 2015 at 4:25 PM UTC
******* jacks & gin (Dinner at Tiffany’s)
Her laughter pumps the gas, dumps the clutch shakes and rattles from each intersection Her wet feet leave monster tracks long damp claws arching across the cement Her hair grows brambles collecting thorns and twigs with the best of bushes Her senses, corvid, snatching up dropped coins, pencils, paperclips Her tongue unfettered, butterfly breath reels with snips of story and songs Her eyes hold drops of honey, sticky sweet lashes follow the sun sunflower cheeks blush cardamom on yellow velvet glow butterfaced with dandelion kisses Rough, regular under hand, stubbornly slate, unchanged unmoved. if her soul is a garden there is a cinderblock there holding down the sunflowers, along with the grass at her core, it grows roots, but no moss.
0
Feb 20, 2016
Feb 20, 2016 at 2:23 PM UTC
Aspect
Anxiety reverberates through my body. My chest becomes so heavy that it feels as if a cinderblock has been lied down on it. All of my body's involuntary functions pause to listen to the demons that live in the back of my head. The demons announce to my anatomy that I have no worth, no value. The demons mock my lungs, "Why work so hard to keep her breathing when nobody on earth wants her alive." My body receives the criticisms and obeys the demon's demands. My lungs quit. I cannot breath. My mouth quits. I cannot speak, the only sounds escaping are soft screams. My ears quit. I hear nothing, besides the demons. My stomach quits. It tries to commit suicide by consuming itself causing me to curl into a ball in severe agony. My eyes try to fight off the negativity. They push the negativity out through tears, but it isn't enough. They look myself over in the mirror, trying to find some value. My eyes explore my entire body, searching desperately for something beautiful, something worth fighting for. They find nothing, but disappointment. My hands fight too. They find a blade and slide it across my wrist, a demon escapes me through the tear in my skin. My body feels a slight relief, but soon a different demon rekindles my self disgust. I let the blade dance across my body, over and over again, feeling slight relief each time. Eventually my entire body is bleeding and I am still only slighting relieved of my pain. My eyes work with my hands on the search to find a place to help the demons to escape. There is no place on my body left, that I could use to release my demons. My crying has stopped and enough demons have left my system to breath comfortably. I put the blade away, and slip into bed, my entire body aching. The physical pain is much easier to handle than the physical and emotional torture the demons would have caused. I lay in bed, trying to be as still as possible to avoid agitating my wounds. I cry to myself silently, because I know I'm going to have to rip myself open again tomorrow night. I feel numb enough to eventually to fall into a slumber. Will I spend the rest of my life rereleasing the same demons over and over again, just to feel unsatisfied and numb? Are my demons right? Is my life worthless? Especially considering I'm at my best either when I'm unconscious or when I'm numb? I am so tired of being numb. Agonizing numbness.
0
Aug 16, 2013
Aug 16, 2013 at 8:55 PM UTC
Cuts
Anxiety reverberates through my body. My chest becomes so heavy that it feels as if a cinderblock has been lied down on it. All of my body's involuntary functions pause to listen to the demons that live in the back of my head. The demons announce to my anatomy that I have no worth, no value. The demons mock my lungs, "Why work so hard to keep her breathing when nobody on earth wants her alive." My body receives the criticisms and obeys the demon's demands. My lungs quit. I cannot breath. My mouth quits. I cannot speak, the only sounds escaping are soft screams. My ears quit. I hear nothing, besides the demons. My stomach quits. It tries to commit suicide by consuming itself causing me to curl into a ball in severe agony. My eyes try to fight off the negativity. They push the negativity out through tears, but it isn't enough. They look myself over in the mirror, trying to find some value. My eyes explore my entire body, searching desperately for something beautiful, something worth fighting for. They find nothing, but disappointment. My hands fight too. They find a blade and slide it across my wrist, a demon escapes me through the tear in my skin. My body feels a slight relief, but soon a different demon rekindles my self disgust. I let the blade dance across my body, over and over again, feeling slight relief each time. Eventually my entire body is bleeding and I am still only slighting relieved of my pain. My eyes work with my hands on the search to find a place to help the demons to escape. There is no place on my body left, that I could use to release my demons. My crying has stopped and enough demons have left my system to breath comfortably. I put the blade away, and slip into bed, my entire body aching. The physical pain is much easier to handle than the physical and emotional torture the demons would have caused. I lay in bed, trying to be as still as possible to avoid agitating my wounds. I cry to myself silently, because I know I'm going to have to rip myself open again tomorrow night. I feel numb enough to eventually to fall into a slumber. Will I spend the rest of my life rereleasing the same demons over and over again, just to feel unsatisfied and numb? Are my demons right? Is my life worthless? Especially considering I'm at my best either when I'm unconscious or when I'm numb? I am so tired of being numb. Agonizing numbness.
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1
1. if i knew where to get drugs, i'd be a ****** 2. sure, my ribs are visible, but what of it? 3. i lose myself in dreams at night and during algebra ii 4. i'm in lust with a girl with a boyfriend 5. or maybe i'm just paranoid 6. i'm lonely in these cinderblock walls 7. i find myself again under stage lights 8. i'm homeless (although not in the traditional sense) 9. i know i'm loved but 10. when my friends laugh with their other friends, it's about me 11. or maybe i'm just paranoid 12.if i lose it, who will visit me in the hell known as 'psychiatric ward'? 13. i can't hold my own in a fight because i cry into my wounds 14. besides, i don't write anymore 15. what is there to write about besides love and insanity anyway? 16. my demons visit this safe haven and desecrate it 17.their names are sarah kate and victoria 18. or maybe i'm just paranoid 19. but i swear i didn't name the voices inside my head 20. i make endless lists of things that don't matter 21. to do, to buy, to cry about, to write about 22. so i close my eyes when i sing 23.or maybe i'm just paranoid 24. and you hated this poem but 25. maybe i'm just paranoid
0
Oct 23, 2014
Oct 23, 2014 at 10:40 AM UTC
maybe i'm paranoid, but at least i'm cute
carrying Kalashnikovs on their backs, the rebel mules have panic in their eyes and resting at the back? fear filled pupils that dilate with every corpse seen vacating itself of tissue and blood, smell the perfume of gun barrels and those lonely enough to be culled, picked off by a trained eye and a government lie and a man laid down in an apartment block out of sight up high. civilian fathers laying spread on the back of a flatbed, cinderblock walls that offer no protection but that of protecting the dead, sharpen another knife for another internet viral video of another guy without a head and finally, cat walk model rebels wearing beaded shrapnel necklaces, gorgeous and chrome red. and they’ll try give them away around, a daily sound of the everyday so they can have a price that they can pay for the ordinary, for the sane, for America’s definition of the lame.
0
Jun 16, 2013
Jun 16, 2013 at 12:44 PM UTC
BEHEAD VIRAL VIDEO: SYRIA
person feels a wave of heat through their neck and face when struck with a thought of their ex boyfriend. a ninth grader gives them a ***** look. person leans against a cold cinderblock wall and relaxes their face. focus on the empty space between the eyeballs and the brain. feel the limp arms and identify the beat of a pulse running through them. repeat after me: self care is boring. paul laurence dunbar knows why the caged bird sings. he never wanted to be an elevator operator. it's a point of privilege. person asks a ninth grader if a bird could see the wind, the river, the sun. "oh... no..." one thing person notices time and again is that when these students drop something they do not pick it up. they let someone else do it. where person is from it is not like that. students would not help person like that, they think. person remembers one time, when they themselves were in the ninth grade, dropping their lunchbox in a crowded hallway and picking it up swiftly in the next step without slowing down. a tall boy behind them said "smooth". person felt proud at the time. person feels good remembering this.
0
Sep 24, 2018
Sep 24, 2018 at 7:44 PM UTC
person walks past 3 sleeping bodies in the train station at 7:07 AM
You’ll find them in all such establishments, (Be they graceful small-town former Victorian homes, Or cinderblock edifices mindful of some campus multi-faith center) Sitting in the basement, cheek-to-jowl With moldering burial records and banking statements, Yellowed newspaper clippings, faded prayer cards Small squared-off boxes hastily tabbed together, Ostensibly temporary containers which have acquired An unintended and wholly unwelcome permanence. The whys and wherefores of their subterranean placement A mixed bag of foible and outright foolishness: Unresolvable squabbles concerning possession and burial, Families that skipped out on the bill, leaving mom behind, Cases of outright not giving a good-goddamn. And so they remain, in lieu of repatriation and redemption, To sit for something akin to perpetuity in some cases (Members of the profession resolute in their respect For the dignity of life, Though their sincerity enjoys less unanimity) While others wait for mass burial Once legal niceties have been satisfied, While still others, in care of firms not so scrupulous About crossing their t’s and dotting their i’s, Are flung, albeit somewhat surreptitiously, out the back door, The remains to take flight if the grass is dry and the wind is brisk, Otherwise to be left to the vagaries Of curious birds and creped soles.
0
Aug 31, 2018
Aug 31, 2018 at 11:28 AM UTC
the unclaimed
I sat outside Lauren's LS classroom While everyone else was at lunch Chewing up and equal mixture of Soggy bread and lunch meat. I sat outside While my back went numb Against the cinderblock From leaning a little too hard. I sat outside While other kids with different schedules Wrote elongated essays for English Just to make 500 words. I sat outside Of Lauren's LS While she tried her hardest To explain to me Why I got 17b wrong And Of course How to fix it. And I sat outside Doing test corrections For a poisoned class called Geometry I sat outside Because of my 57% score. I sat outside, And I decided to study.
0
May 7, 2013
May 7, 2013 at 10:00 PM UTC
I Sat Outside
These streets knew feet in days gone by, bustling sidewalks, crowded storefronts, laughter, light and dancers leaking out of smoke-filled bars. Cars would wind through intersections, blood cells between neighborhoods. From The Corner came The Roar. He remembers how the Autumn sounded                        back in '84 when Alan Trammell brought The Series home, the arcing shot off Gibson's bat, the rolling wave of soaring voices.                       Old English                              "D"               tattooed on the hearts                         of a city      who's been hurting since the 50's. Bless You Boys. Ya did it-- went and Sparked up Michigan and lit a dimming town again in Corktown's widening eyes. In 20 years, though, losses pile up. 55 and starved for signs of trends reversing, luck upending, impending relief or just some kind of                   something. Sickening, cloying rapid decay        as neighborhoods die. These streets know crumbling cinderblock walls and blistered paint coats don't cover ribcages starting to show-- steel girder bones--and windows blown out, like teeth lost from a well-spoken mouth, allow the Lake Michigan wind to howl                       out the tale--             through oxidized bones--        of just what it looks like       when economic war hits home. Heartbeats still find footing in Motor City streets, beneath          the Old English "D," but mind the scoreboard smart; the Tigers lost a hundred games                     in 2003.
0
May 11, 2015
May 11, 2015 at 6:58 PM UTC
Old English "D"
These streets knew feet in days gone by, bustling sidewalks, crowded storefronts, laughter, light and dancers leaking out of smoke-filled bars. Cars would wind through intersections, blood cells between neighborhoods. From The Corner came The Roar. He remembers how the Autumn sounded                        back in '84 when Alan Trammell brought The Series home, the arcing shot off Gibson's bat, the rolling wave of soaring voices.                       Old English                              "D"               tattooed on the hearts                         of a city      who's been hurting since the 50's. Bless You Boys. Ya did it-- went and Sparked up Michigan and lit a dimming town again in Corktown's widening eyes. In 20 years, though, losses pile up. 55 and starved for signs of trends reversing, luck upending, impending relief or just some kind of                   something. Sickening, cloying rapid decay        as neighborhoods die. These streets know crumbling cinderblock walls and blistered paint coats don't cover ribcages starting to show-- steel girder bones--and windows blown out, like teeth lost from a well-spoken mouth, allow the Lake Michigan wind to howl                       out the tale--             through oxidized bones--        of just what it looks like       when economic war hits home. Heartbeats still find footing in Motor City streets, beneath          the Old English "D," but mind the scoreboard smart; the Tigers lost a hundred games                     in 2003.
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45
Underneath the burning building in my gut So much is preserved safely In the memory where you are smiling I find peace I want to be lonely in private But there is no space for that Under the rubble Compound fracture of bitter jawline That same smile a photo Warping in fire I want to preserve you Like a wasp in amber But we are not as slow as that Not as gentle The theory is Two objects fall at the same speed Regardless of mass Except for people We do not fall for each other at the same pace I felt like the man with the rescue dog That heard your heartbeat After the cement settled And the wood grew cold White ash Black cinderblock paperweights Your body preserved under Layers of broken building But you felt safe Because you set the fire And I was the man that found you Some secrets can’t stay buried We were cave people Found and revived I’m not new to this Just rusty Just dusty There are burn marks on our bodies And I have almost forgotten how mine got there There were things you thought you should go back for Things you wanted to leave behind But in the saving you took what you could carry There was baggage in your desperation To save what you thought was important When you burnt yourself to the ground You forgot that fire is a funny thing It lives too And you can’t control it There were some houses Left standing Whole acres unlit for no reason Not everything gets burned And there is a photo of you Cigarette hole dimples A smile that brings me peace And you brought with you Bits of burning ribcage And smoke filled lung To hide your heart minimally I brought nothing Mine is slightly weather calloused now But it works just fine It’s just rusty Just dusty So take this What is left of my burning breast plate Carved message on the inside like an oversized locket Underneath the black and white negative of your film strip “Thank you for trying”
0
Dec 27, 2012
Dec 27, 2012 at 6:01 PM UTC
When We Set Ouselves on Fire
Underneath the burning building in my gut So much is preserved safely In the memory where you are smiling I find peace I want to be lonely in private But there is no space for that Under the rubble Compound fracture of bitter jawline That same smile a photo Warping in fire I want to preserve you Like a wasp in amber But we are not as slow as that Not as gentle The theory is Two objects fall at the same speed Regardless of mass Except for people We do not fall for each other at the same pace I felt like the man with the rescue dog That heard your heartbeat After the cement settled And the wood grew cold White ash Black cinderblock paperweights Your body preserved under Layers of broken building But you felt safe Because you set the fire And I was the man that found you Some secrets can’t stay buried We were cave people Found and revived I’m not new to this Just rusty Just dusty There are burn marks on our bodies And I have almost forgotten how mine got there There were things you thought you should go back for Things you wanted to leave behind But in the saving you took what you could carry There was baggage in your desperation To save what you thought was important When you burnt yourself to the ground You forgot that fire is a funny thing It lives too And you can’t control it There were some houses Left standing Whole acres unlit for no reason Not everything gets burned And there is a photo of you Cigarette hole dimples A smile that brings me peace And you brought with you Bits of burning ribcage And smoke filled lung To hide your heart minimally I brought nothing Mine is slightly weather calloused now But it works just fine It’s just rusty Just dusty So take this What is left of my burning breast plate Carved message on the inside like an oversized locket Underneath the black and white negative of your film strip “Thank you for trying”
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69
The movement of her body was entirely too loud She is desert throat gasps When the water is so good She doesn’t stop for air Can hear her comin’ Her rusty train wreck tremble On loose tracks Her collapse is a cinderblock rain The crumble is so much quieter than the crash Her crumble is so much quieter than the crash Her hands shake as she swipes her EBT card for the fifteenth time She puts back the bacon this time Throws down 5.50 for the Marlboros She talks to herself Angrily Slams ever door she enters Every door she exits Her children think she is crazy She is crazy She is a body built On passive aggression And the threat of a shaky foundation When the earthquake hits Any day could be my last day you know Her son turns up the tv Her daughter plugs her headphones into her cd player Do you all think I am talking just to hear myself talk? And if you don’t stop sleep talking *Telling me you’re going to **** me* I am sending you to the hospital The boy mutes the tv Dries his eyes before they’re wet He shakes his head Begs her not to do that Says he doesn’t know he’s doing it Says he doesn’t want to **** her She walks away And he is left wondering I remind him later That we were not raised on truth So it’s hard sometimes To trust people I put a lock on his door Tell him to shut himself in at night As for the mother We don’t talk anymore Like I said She’s crazy And I’ve got too much of that myself already Somewhere a door is slamming Somewhere cinderblocks are crumbling quiet There is a sizzle like slowly cracking glass I feel it crawl my spine It crawls his The girl misses it Head buried in pop culture Going deaf in trying to drown out Her mother’s noise Do you think I am talking just to hear myself talk? As a poet I ask myself the same thing Ask how far the apple can fall from the tree If any one of us are lucky It will be just far enough
0
Apr 23, 2012
Apr 23, 2012 at 1:20 PM UTC
The Apple the Tree and a Crazy Woman (FLP)
The movement of her body was entirely too loud She is desert throat gasps When the water is so good She doesn’t stop for air Can hear her comin’ Her rusty train wreck tremble On loose tracks Her collapse is a cinderblock rain The crumble is so much quieter than the crash Her crumble is so much quieter than the crash Her hands shake as she swipes her EBT card for the fifteenth time She puts back the bacon this time Throws down 5.50 for the Marlboros She talks to herself Angrily Slams ever door she enters Every door she exits Her children think she is crazy She is crazy She is a body built On passive aggression And the threat of a shaky foundation When the earthquake hits Any day could be my last day you know Her son turns up the tv Her daughter plugs her headphones into her cd player Do you all think I am talking just to hear myself talk? And if you don’t stop sleep talking *Telling me you’re going to **** me* I am sending you to the hospital The boy mutes the tv Dries his eyes before they’re wet He shakes his head Begs her not to do that Says he doesn’t know he’s doing it Says he doesn’t want to **** her She walks away And he is left wondering I remind him later That we were not raised on truth So it’s hard sometimes To trust people I put a lock on his door Tell him to shut himself in at night As for the mother We don’t talk anymore Like I said She’s crazy And I’ve got too much of that myself already Somewhere a door is slamming Somewhere cinderblocks are crumbling quiet There is a sizzle like slowly cracking glass I feel it crawl my spine It crawls his The girl misses it Head buried in pop culture Going deaf in trying to drown out Her mother’s noise Do you think I am talking just to hear myself talk? As a poet I ask myself the same thing Ask how far the apple can fall from the tree If any one of us are lucky It will be just far enough
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63
The restaurant where I often eat has a raw cinderblock shell to show the world It was painted a long time ago, when a new owner bought it out It was meant to beautify, it didn't work But I guess it's the thought that counts. On the East wall, near one corner, is a rectangle of thick white paint in a field of grime. Always fresh, always clean. It is marred by a series of looping black slashes. Stare at them for long enough, relax the muscles behind your eyes, let them slip out of focus And you'll start to see letters In the dipping and diving bands of black. It's writing An alien calligraphy People as woefully uncool as you or I weren't meant to decode it There is energy in the strokes though. It's a performance frozen at it's moment of completion You can see velocity, grace, excitement, a little fear, and a deft, darting contempt. All of these things in the broad and narrow ribbons of paint. When I'm in the right sort of mood, with a full stomach and a lazily sunfried imagination, with the heat from the asphalt making things in the middle distance quaver, I can make out the dim shape of the artist. See where they stood, the sweep of their arm the turn of their head, wary of witnesses. Days in and out, it goes on. Bare white one day, blackened, besmirched, beautiful the next. The snowy rectangle grows thicker. Why the owner never stakes out his restaurant one night, I'll never know. Why the artist doesn't venture beyond that one little pen, or choose a new wall entirely will remain a mystery, probably for all my breaths to come. It's like some mad story penned by a poor, gibbering lunatic. Each is doomed to a war neither can win, and neither can lose. I bend double I'm laughing so hard They take it so seriously. But then, don't we all have our petty conflicts?
0
Nov 15, 2014
Nov 15, 2014 at 9:59 PM UTC
The Great War of Paint
The restaurant where I often eat has a raw cinderblock shell to show the world It was painted a long time ago, when a new owner bought it out It was meant to beautify, it didn't work But I guess it's the thought that counts. On the East wall, near one corner, is a rectangle of thick white paint in a field of grime. Always fresh, always clean. It is marred by a series of looping black slashes. Stare at them for long enough, relax the muscles behind your eyes, let them slip out of focus And you'll start to see letters In the dipping and diving bands of black. It's writing An alien calligraphy People as woefully uncool as you or I weren't meant to decode it There is energy in the strokes though. It's a performance frozen at it's moment of completion You can see velocity, grace, excitement, a little fear, and a deft, darting contempt. All of these things in the broad and narrow ribbons of paint. When I'm in the right sort of mood, with a full stomach and a lazily sunfried imagination, with the heat from the asphalt making things in the middle distance quaver, I can make out the dim shape of the artist. See where they stood, the sweep of their arm the turn of their head, wary of witnesses. Days in and out, it goes on. Bare white one day, blackened, besmirched, beautiful the next. The snowy rectangle grows thicker. Why the owner never stakes out his restaurant one night, I'll never know. Why the artist doesn't venture beyond that one little pen, or choose a new wall entirely will remain a mystery, probably for all my breaths to come. It's like some mad story penned by a poor, gibbering lunatic. Each is doomed to a war neither can win, and neither can lose. I bend double I'm laughing so hard They take it so seriously. But then, don't we all have our petty conflicts?
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33
I would sell myself a bill of goods Before I would ever inveigh The babble That some-have the chutz-puh To accept as some obscure Personal quest That they must compel Themselves to fulfill As the Tower Of Babel was To the intrangient zealots As they go about Invoking invidiousness Binging on the intoxicating inversion Of partisan  opinionativeness Quoting as they go "Do unto me not as I do unto you" When... In a chronometric second Any possible bipartisan thoughts That they may truly possess Has passed through their cinderblock brain Like the ray of light On a birefringent trajectory Unable to acknowledge or accept either one As the refracting action Accentuates the intolerance Invalidating them for The total lack Of introspection Resulting from the Total absence Of any biological binder That on any level would ever Allow even the slightest sprig Of libertarian thought To escape deracination Slamming the lid tightly In hopes that noone  would see The dividends that grow from The derivation as a desideratum People who can't see it Personally.... I don't need em.
0
Jan 8, 2016
Jan 8, 2016 at 2:57 AM UTC
Personally ...I don't need em.
He is red Flakes of skin breaking away from his arms and face He smiles stretching the cigarette stain on his white mustache You young people have got it all wrong Let me tell you a story Don’t worry it’s a funny story He looks behind him to make sure he can soak up my time I tell the cashier to stay and check if anybody comes One time there was this really dumb bird Had a nice beard like yours Real busy guy And he waited til winter to fly south If this story is about me I’m not sure Some of us work real hard And still manage to justify that we have nothing I wonder if he knows I can see the boogers in his nose The bird finally took off for home But it began to rain He kept flying Then it started to hail The hail beat his wings It was getting hard to flap His body began to shiver He smiles again It makes his lips crack and bleed a little Underneath the stretch of yellow He exhales and his breath smells sweetly of beer It began to snow Lightly at first Though it was cold it was easier to fly But the snow fell thicker It coated his body His heart slowed He began to feel really tired He started to descend He was dying He places a hand on mine for a moment His is comfortably rough Shovel callous rough Cinderblock stack rough If that touch was for me or him I’m not sure All these stories are just ways we beg people to stay This poetry is just a way to keep you here Touch you with my rough and tremble So you can look at my cracked broken and ****** A little longer The bird kept falling Until he hit the earth And you know where he landed? Right in a big cow patty *But the warmth of the fresh **** Melted the snow Gave him his life back So he rolled around in it and began to sing He sang and sang and sang And a hawk heard the singing It was winter The hawk was hungry And he ate that bird with the nice beard He slaps the counter separating us Eyes widen to mounds of earth Two big fat piles of cow **** staring at me and smiling I don’t feel like laughing And the moral of that story young man *Is if you’re covered in **** and somehow happy* Keep your mouth shut These stories are just reasons And I don’t feel like laughing I laugh anyway
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May 28, 2012
May 28, 2012 at 5:10 PM UTC
When You're Covered in **** and Happy
He is red Flakes of skin breaking away from his arms and face He smiles stretching the cigarette stain on his white mustache You young people have got it all wrong Let me tell you a story Don’t worry it’s a funny story He looks behind him to make sure he can soak up my time I tell the cashier to stay and check if anybody comes One time there was this really dumb bird Had a nice beard like yours Real busy guy And he waited til winter to fly south If this story is about me I’m not sure Some of us work real hard And still manage to justify that we have nothing I wonder if he knows I can see the boogers in his nose The bird finally took off for home But it began to rain He kept flying Then it started to hail The hail beat his wings It was getting hard to flap His body began to shiver He smiles again It makes his lips crack and bleed a little Underneath the stretch of yellow He exhales and his breath smells sweetly of beer It began to snow Lightly at first Though it was cold it was easier to fly But the snow fell thicker It coated his body His heart slowed He began to feel really tired He started to descend He was dying He places a hand on mine for a moment His is comfortably rough Shovel callous rough Cinderblock stack rough If that touch was for me or him I’m not sure All these stories are just ways we beg people to stay This poetry is just a way to keep you here Touch you with my rough and tremble So you can look at my cracked broken and ****** A little longer The bird kept falling Until he hit the earth And you know where he landed? Right in a big cow patty *But the warmth of the fresh **** Melted the snow Gave him his life back So he rolled around in it and began to sing He sang and sang and sang And a hawk heard the singing It was winter The hawk was hungry And he ate that bird with the nice beard He slaps the counter separating us Eyes widen to mounds of earth Two big fat piles of cow **** staring at me and smiling I don’t feel like laughing And the moral of that story young man *Is if you’re covered in **** and somehow happy* Keep your mouth shut These stories are just reasons And I don’t feel like laughing I laugh anyway
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70
No need for dramatics but cinderblock house arrangment tempo Is not equal to the federal concordance Checking back No No No wait equals What professor 25
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Jan 25, 2013
Jan 25, 2013 at 12:51 AM UTC
smoking the fattest bud of the season in jessies' bubbler
a lament locked on her lips held in place by lipstick its powerful sorrows leak down her chin in a thin red rivulet to fall to the pure white satin sheet pooling there like a lake of fire smouldering there like a woman's scorned heart the song of her eyes has become warped and distorted and distant like the sound of a small child crying in some obscure corner of your house but you cannot place the sound it moves with a religious dignity that defys logic it escapes your grasp for you were never intended to to see her vulnerability his closed fist mouth is drawn taught with all the things he withholds with all the children of his long nights spent pacing and thinking in the small cell of his cinderblock mind these children are but shadows of  thought but he feeds them like starving dogs rabid to be released into steaming hot sun his mask of a ****** expression haunts his brittle dream he keeps coming to a mirror to behold that he is unchanged he is the man the boy wanted to be he is what his mother always dreamed he'd be her nurturing touch is cracked its egg shell surface bleeds its sounds are foreign and i surrender to its relentless devotions bend to the precise course they dictate absolution prostrate to the purchased dream follower of the prepaid horror a lament locked on her lips held in place by lipstick its powerful sorrows leak down her chin in a thin red rivulet to fall to the pure white satin sheet pooling there like a lake of fire smouldering there like a woman's scorned heart and within that punishment box i bleed for the face i am not i suffer the eggshell dream for a tenderness that i did not harm
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Sep 25, 2013
Sep 25, 2013 at 3:24 PM UTC
the eggshell dream
a lament locked on her lips held in place by lipstick its powerful sorrows leak down her chin in a thin red rivulet to fall to the pure white satin sheet pooling there like a lake of fire smouldering there like a woman's scorned heart the song of her eyes has become warped and distorted and distant like the sound of a small child crying in some obscure corner of your house but you cannot place the sound it moves with a religious dignity that defys logic it escapes your grasp for you were never intended to to see her vulnerability his closed fist mouth is drawn taught with all the things he withholds with all the children of his long nights spent pacing and thinking in the small cell of his cinderblock mind these children are but shadows of  thought but he feeds them like starving dogs rabid to be released into steaming hot sun his mask of a ****** expression haunts his brittle dream he keeps coming to a mirror to behold that he is unchanged he is the man the boy wanted to be he is what his mother always dreamed he'd be her nurturing touch is cracked its egg shell surface bleeds its sounds are foreign and i surrender to its relentless devotions bend to the precise course they dictate absolution prostrate to the purchased dream follower of the prepaid horror a lament locked on her lips held in place by lipstick its powerful sorrows leak down her chin in a thin red rivulet to fall to the pure white satin sheet pooling there like a lake of fire smouldering there like a woman's scorned heart and within that punishment box i bleed for the face i am not i suffer the eggshell dream for a tenderness that i did not harm
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53
*standing still feet glued to a floor that’s falling through destined for destruction your eyes glass over you turn your head away you don’t see me you release me from your gentle grasp a cinderblock  falls on my chest  crushes me i can’t breathe all hope is lost but right before  i flat line my lungs fill with air my heart begins to beat you rescue me for a second i’m weightless i’m safe time passes seconds are short and you remember our little  emotionless game the cinderblock comes flying at my head how did i  ever  feel safe he loves me he loves me not it’s like picking petals off a dead rose leaving everything to chance throwing a dice  and hoping it lands on the side you desire you wrap me in your arms yet i still feel  miles away from you love anger sadness envelope my mind sending my thoughts into a whirlwind of crazy emotion drowning in the tears that escape through the cracks of the glassy walls that you constantly break down i’m naked you see through me no secrets nothing just for my mind to know my body my eyes  scream every thought i desperately  want to keep inside i tell myself be strong protect yourself with the glassy eyed distance with which he drives you insane failure must be my strong suit ‘cause having strength when i’m with you--  impossible*
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Feb 2, 2014
Feb 2, 2014 at 6:30 PM UTC
Composition no5
Your long fingers tap on my nervous heart. I love your fickle soul and freckled shoulders. You say you won't find peace of mind in a cinderblock room or on a piece of notebook paper, so you crumple up your doubts and hide your body with mine. My shrunken lungs cannot draw breaths not used to say your name. I will be a blanket to warm your bones from your downdraft hopes. I will comb your hair with my fingers on the days you don't wake. But my heart breaks on battlefields you will never hear of. I lick wounds you will never know to see. I train my trembling hands so they may gently soothe you in sleep. I can love you better than I can fix myself. I will fight becoming what I fear in order to be all that you need.
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Mar 30, 2014
Mar 30, 2014 at 10:04 PM UTC
December 18, 2013
This morning I read your name for the very first time. The sad thing is, any other day, I would have just seen a name. But today I saw a cinderblock on the vital organs of those left in your wake. Laying heavy in the mouths of those trying to remember the importance of breathing, of moving on. Today we are forced to remember that no one is ever just a name. You were a heartbeat. A soul. A vibration of the universe that felt anger and pain and love. Someone should have told you that, the night you tried to find wings.
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Apr 17, 2013
Apr 17, 2013 at 2:24 PM UTC
More Than A Name
It is grey and snowy here And I kinda miss the sun She said Woman I am wishing you the warmth only a lover can offer Via breathy nothings into your ear Fills you like a balloon And stands you so still That your shadow on the snow Looks more like a stain I know you Like the snowy backdrop of my foggy thoughts When poetry is all that is left To know who we are And what we’ve become It is us trapped in the porcelain distance Between scalding hot coffee And your shaking palm So this is me Wishing you warmth And love And burning belly cinderblock butterflies The kind that don’t make you tremble Just settle Into the comfiest spot you know Still cold? I didn’t think so
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Nov 19, 2011
Nov 19, 2011 at 3:49 PM UTC
It is Grey and Snowy and She Misses the Sun
Should have put a bullet in the brain Should have doused it with kerosene and lit a match Should have tied a cinderblock to the worthless wretch and chucked it in the lake But the most rotten things resurface and eat the sweetness that you spent two years building Should have left well enough alone instead of leaving the coffin door wide open for the wickedness to crawl back out
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Feb 28, 2017
Feb 28, 2017 at 4:12 PM UTC
Should Have
Cinderblock ashes and miles a sunder And the crestfallen seas as wide there after The nightingale as she was called Bold, brave and on a journey Searching for the missing piece in her heart She looked and looked But she couldn't find She asked and asked But nobody replied And her words came to deaf ears But the nightingale traveled still Far and wide and never wavering Wandering the great vortex within And asked every possible being But to no avail The nightingale of the dark was lost And in midst of the ever looming Swallowing shadows coalescing To a tapestry of nothing but black She recognized one fateful truth No amount of screaming nor Soothing of her pain will surmount The fact that no one Nobody is going to come help her Find what she was looking for Only herself
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Aug 3, 2016
Aug 3, 2016 at 7:00 AM UTC
The nightingale
Over the bridges to the north side of town fluorescent flickers, the beer billboards are bigger Where you live. We don’t really have billboards on the east side of the rail yard Where I live. But I don’t find you in the elementary school shut down, infested by the deadly spiders. or patriarchs inebriated, stumbling back to cinderblock houses where no one really waits up anymore. Every soul a flickered star. Maybe dying, finding last comforts in the black velvet of night. No, I don’t find you hiding in the hateful corners of your brother’s triangle folded flag that rested on a coffin. Or the alcoholic bottle your mother hands me with a friendly smile. Tiny threads of crumbling concrete barely connect my world with yours I might be dreaming, at night lying in the grass of the tallest hill Where you live Holding me selfishly, the night is black in my eyes and the view is not so clear back to Where I live.
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Jun 30, 2011
Jun 30, 2011 at 10:39 PM UTC
North