I wanted you to admire the
bare bones and brush strokes
that painted me woman

So I disrobed.

But more than wanted,
I desired you to seize me
as a victor does his spoils

So I withdrew my weapons.

But more than seize me,
I craved that you’d relish me
as the chef savors his dish

So I lied and said I didn't love you.

And that’s all you needed
to eat your fill of me
Until gluttony left
nothing but skeletons in your bed.

"The best people possess a feeling for beauty,
The courage to take risks,
The discipline to tell the truth,
The capacity for sacrifice.
Ironically, their virtues make them vulnerable
Yet, they are often wounded,
Sometimes destroyed."
- Ernest Hemingway

I don't care what you want.
I will take what I want.
I will get what I want.
You can't make me open up.
I won't leave myself weak
On an island that no one can reach.
You are testing my patience.
I never promised you trust.
I never said that I must.
Shut up, that's enough!
You don't like this, then tough.
You don't have to stick around.
There is no obligation here to which you are bound.
You can run away anytime, so go ahead.
You are not the first one;
You certainly won't be the last.

my heart, encased in frost
keeping the burning in and the cold out
but the burning is yearning to be set free
do I let the warmth go?
let the cold in?
eventually the fire is going to burn me and ill be one again
vulnerable to the cold of the shadows

I often wonder will things get much more tolerable
Wondering if the future sorrow is enough to swallow
Will I have enough capital for my family to borrow
Wondering if I will be able to say every night,
"I get to wake up next to the man of my dreams tomorrow"
The older I become and the more I begin to live,
The more reality sinks in and showcases an imagery beyond livid
Only 7 when I began to write
That same exact age was when I had to fight over and over for my life
I'm human, yes I say ****** phrases out of spite
But in all actuality I speak what's on my mind to sleep peacefully at night
Words are powerful
Encouraging notions can mend broken hearts
The lack of love and bravery to stand up for what we believe is tearing society apart
I just landed in the home that made me who I am
I felt that I should give you a little bit of my mind so you'll understand WHO I AM
I want you, you reading this to adore me for my kind words
Only because they become powerful once they're heard
I'm human far from perfect
But every word I write and process through my cranium is worth it

It’s easier to wear
My heart on my sleeve
So you can just tear it off
And conflict your damage
Rather than having you rip through
Every other vulnerable part of my body
To make a small scratch on it

What if I told you that I love you to death?
That I'm dying, baby, because this isn't it.
I'm giving up because you were not it
But I treated you like you were.
I threw my hands up for you
I let you across the river that cripples my own journey.
I let you lie next to me.
I let every word mean the world to me.
I let every lie comfort me.
And now all I do is cry because I can't believe it.
I can't believe how the weather changed.
I can't believe how cold it is.
I can't hear you but I see you.
I see you moving along
Moving on with the crowd that passes me by.
Waking across the dirt where I reside.
I see you pass me by without a second glance.
I was the only one who gave you a tenth chance!
And now I'm the only one I have.
Now there are multiple paths but  I'm afraid.
I'm terrified because there are different heart breaks before me and I have to choose one.
I have choose a different way to die.
I have to wake up and breathe and pretend that nothing makes me cry.
I have to pretend that other things matter more
And the more I think about it
The more I realize that I've been dying.
I've been crying
I've been to hell
I've been alone
I've been apologizing.
I've been waking as if i have somewhere to go.
As if there were someone waiting for me at home.
But I put key in the the door
Only to swing it open
And find a ghost.
I  find it haunting because I can hear your heart beating
But it's just noise to me.